So frustrating paring down the clothes!

Why don't you just check a bag and do away with the fretting?

I agree with Lin C. Check a bag. Life’s too short to stress over packing.

Use the incentive I use with my wife, if you get there, and find you really did need one more shirt/dress/slacks...then go buy it. Even I, on longer trips, might pick up a shirt to liven up the mix.

Shopping is a great cultural experience. Then you donate everything before you go home; another great cultural experience.

The positive is that you’re probably the only person on your trip who will notice what you’re wearing. : )

I'm sure your son won't mind ;-)

I'm trying to decide whether to bring a cute dress for dinners during the trip I leave on tomorrow. It weighs so very little and would be a nice change of pace.

I've enjoyed picking up a new article of clothing during my trips, which then become a souvenir. I find that is easier to do with daytime clothes than evening. So I guess I'll go swap out a shirt and swap in my cute dress!

Jean, I very much dislike those types of responses.

As far as checking a bag, it would just ruin my trip if it didn’t arrive. I know several people that has happened to, and I just won’t do it, especially when it’s not a nonstop,

Is there something you have packed other than clothes that you can leave behind that you value less?

And I get the carry on. I have a male colleague who was missing his bag for his entire three week trip to the US. I am not very easy to fit and it would not go well. When we went hiking in the Dolomites last summer, we packed our hiking poles in a nylon bag and checked it. We wanted our poles obviously but it was much less of a problem than losing our suitcase.

Lulu, I totally get your need to vent.

While I can tell from your previous posts that you are much more fashion conscious than I am, I do care what I look like. If I'm in jeans and a tee, I'm probably also wearing a blazer or jacket. It took me forever to find a packable raincoat that doesn't looks like I'm camping. I'm still struggling with shoes. I haven't found the perfect combination of walk all day for miles comfort without looking like I'm headed for the gym. I get so close, but the search is still on.

And I am carry-on only for the outbound flights. I've traveled several times with others that have lost their luggage for days. Years ago traveling with a group to Hawaii everyone gave me grief for not checking my bag. Well, their checked bags were left in Chicago and I was the only person not wearing gift shop tees and Hawaiian shirts the first 3 days of the trip.

Enjoy your trip!

The positive is that you’re probably the only person on your trip who will notice what you’re wearing. : )

Yes, that is very likely the case. However, back when we took more pictures than we do now, my daughter was looking through them, and commented that we saw a lot of things in a day. I was confused, looked at what she was seeing and laughed. The pictures were over 3-4 days, only the outfit was the same.

@CWsocial, since you described your dress as “your cute dress” vs. “a shirt”, I would take the dress! Take the clothes that you like the most. : ). I like each outfit to be a favorite when I’m traveling.

My clothing standard is clean, functional items in decent condition. My sense is that no one gives a fig as to what tourists wear. Pack what you wish and have a fabulous trip.

I would take the dress!

Jean, done! The shirt is out and the "cute dress" is in, along with a tiny bit of cute jewelry!

Take the clothes that you like the most. : ). I like each outfit to be a favorite when I’m traveling.

That's the thing that I enjoy, within practical limits of what I'm willing to carry. And I like picking up new pieces during my travels, which often become new travel favorites!

Bruce is a male --- He doesn't get it -- nor do I. Women dress for other women. For men it just has to be relatively clean worn for less than a week. I will put a PS on this later.

Have found a kindred spirit in Lulu. Pack your outfit in your son’s bag. I had planned on a major shopping spree in Florence and Paris last August/September, but it was the wrong season for me and ended up buying only 3 pair of shoes, 2 jackets and 2 dresses. It was disappointing. For me, it is the toiletries which take up the space, plus my pillow. I pretty much wear the same clothes when travelling as I do at home, because although other tourists may not notice, European shop assistants certainly do. Am a great fan of Alquema smash dresses which pack down to very little and do not need ironing. Took 3 on my last trip

Oooooh Frank! That is a YIKES from me! 😂

My husband and I are the exact opposite of your characterization.

I am happy to wear the same black leggings, black top, Doc Martens creepers, and leather jacket every day - as long as everything is reasonably clean.

My husband has oodles of clothes and when we travel he brings white leather sneakers, his navy suede Chelsea boots, brown leather city boots, and sometimes a pair of nice monk straps - plus a wool topcoat, his waxed Barbour jacket, a long periwinkle blue cashmere scarf AND a couple of other scarves… he’s styling at all times.

Not sure who either of us is “dressing for,” but I think I am dressing for comfort, and to look a little bit Goth. Which is easier now that I am getting old and crumbly. :-)

packable raincoat that doesn't looks like I'm camping

jeanm, care to share which raincoat you have? I currently have a boring black raincoat with no shape whatsoever, but it's big enough to fit over a regular coat if needed, yet small enough to tote around everyday while I'm out exploring. Occasionally I see someone wearing a cute raincoat and briefly consider walking up to them and asking what brand it is.

Lulu, I've come to the realization that my clothes are dull, but they are easily packable and washable, so they're practical. Still, I need to make more effort to find cute tops that are also easily packable and washable. Surely they must exist. I've never for a minute considered that anyone might think less of me because of my clothes though.

I like that we can all do what works best for us, so I think you should squeeze that outfit into your son's bag!

I do agree with Frank that most of the time women dress for other women. But I also dress for my husband. Actually, he’s gotten into elevated dressing in the past 10 years.

So, on this trip during the day, I’ll be wearing my coat, so daytime dressing isn’t as important to me. Even then I try to elevate the look with snazzy scarfs, gloves and a hat. I don’t like boring, can you tell?

Even during the day mostly in a coat, I still like to look nice when we stop in stores or stop to eat. I can’t recall the poster above, but I try to elevate my daytime wear with a scarf, or blazer as she does. What I was referring to in my post is evening! And I totally disagree that no one notices what you are wearing, especially in the evenings.

I think I will ask my son to pack that extra outfit.

Jeanm…I have found a pair of booties that are so comfortable. They are Dansko, the current version looks like it’s called Dansko Faith. Expensive, but very roomy in the toe box and looks stylish on. If you have wide feet they are wonderful. I’m a 10 wide and I had so much room with the medium width, the salesman told me this one is known for that.

I can relate to so many of these issues............my biggest problem is that when we travel, it's easy for me to fall into the trap of aspirational packing, and add in lots of options for outfits I think would be stylish, cute, help-me-blend-in-with-the -locals, forgetting that the reality is I will reach for the same tried and true, comfortable outfits on our trip and never end up wearing these other options :~).

It’s definitely a learning curve to just take what you know you will wear. I have to say, I’ve gotten pretty good at it, my husband has not. I’m retired so I can take the time to redo, rethink, trial pack. He works long hours, so he’s tired and has a hard time deciding the weekend before and takes twice as many tops as he needs. I get on him because I’m the one steaming or ironing them when we get back. I do help him though , and he’s gotten great at limiting pants and just taking one blazer.

Tbh I've never given a hoot about clothes...like furniture, worth 10 pence on the pound the moment they're bought. But if I were a clothes person I reckon I'd tailor my travel wardrobe toward mix-and-match...minimal core pieces I could wear in different combinations to create the illusion of having packed a multitude of outfits.

Lulu348, thanks for the Dansko recommendation. I'll take a look.

KRS I have the Eddie Bauer Cloud Cap Rain Parks. I see it's been discontinued, but Sierra has it available in black and topaz. Mine is boring black so I can wear it to nice restaurants, hits mid thigh, weighs about 11 oz. and has kept me dry in downpours. I sized up so I can wear my Blazer or puffer under it.

Regarding women dressing for women. This woman dresses for myself.

I love a good packing discussion, but there is no right or wrong way to do it.
I live in a west coastal place where no one dresses up, except for weddings, ( sometimes not even then around here..☹️) so I’m not going to be doing so on a vacation.
My rule now is that every top has to go with every bottom.
Three colours only, in the mix.
Everything I pack has to be used at least three times, or it stays home.
I have tons of teeny containers that I’ve saved over the years for toiletries .
I practised years ago filling a tiny container with say, shampoo and counting how many days it lasted at home.
Then I knew how much and what size to pack for however many days the trip will be.
Two pairs of shoes, and one light slip on pair for the accommodation , also good to use for slippers, such as Skechers or Tom’s.
I pack a carryon size suitcase, but I do check it.
I’m tired of hauling stuff through airports.
If it’s lost, my travel insurance can dress me till it shows up.
Spare set of unders and t-shirt in carryon bag.
I don’t worry too much about how I look to others as long as I and my clothes are clean!
No one….repeat…no one, is looking at me.

And remember….the shops in Europe are wonderful!