Travel like you'll be back again

BMWBGV, "travel like you'll be back again", is the one piece of RS advice that I think is only appropriate for people who are young, with money. Maybe because he came up with that when he was young and had an infinite travel future. Or his target audience was the post-college adventurous type. For the majority of people I know (who are neither) who have any interest in foreign travel at all, Europe might be a once-in-a-lifetime thing.

For me, I'd love to go back and see more of places I've only visited once (Paris, Rome, Krakow, Vienna), but I'm running out of good travel years, and need to cover more places I haven't been. Yeah, its more about time than money. Spouse has other ideas, so its always a compromise.

We do a mix. We want to see new places but love returning to our favorites such as Lake Como, stayed there four times, and London, also four trips there. Our bucket list is shrinking as we have traveled a lot. The only place high on our list that we have missed and now will not visit is Burma due to their treatment of the Rohingya and more.

Stan, I take your point.

Suki, I like the mix, too. If you truly loved a place why not return?

For us it's tempting to revisit, say, Bavaria, perhaps the most beautiful place in the world, or should we use our limited funds to see the Panama Canal?

I have lived overseas twice (Saudi Arabia and Germany) working as a civil servant for the US Army during the 80s and early 90s.
I had only been to Canada and Mexico before I moved to Riyadh, Saudi Arabia in 1981.

I traveled a lot during that period and never had a sense that I would be back to some places. As it turned out, during that period, I was able to go back to places like Rome, Paris, Venice, much of Southern Germany, Austria and Switzerland.

After retiring in 2010, we have taken overseas trips frequently, generally 2 or 3 a year except during the two year COVID shutdowns. I have been back to some places, but most of our travel has been to places that we haven't seen. Now I have been to 78 foreign countries and still have a wish list for a few more.

When I first traveled to Europe in the 80s, fewer Americans did so. They were either military or civilians stationed in Europe or wealthy people. This has changed a lot. Way more people travel overseas now. Airfares are comparatively lower (considering inflation) than they were in the 80s. I remember paying $1200 for my Son to fly from Georgia to Germany for the summer in the late 80s. Until recently, I could beat that price.

Example, I love Italy and have been there several times. Been to Rome twice and Florence twice. Been to Venice 5 times. Frankly, having been to Venice 5 times, I have no desire to return there, however, would love to return to Rome once more.

At first, my travels focused on historical places, but after much travel, visiting scenic places has become more a factor. Scenic places like the Galapagos Islands; Cruise to Alaska visiting Glacier Bay and the Hubbard Glacier as well as Denali post cruise; up the coast of Norway to the North Cape; visiting the Great Ocean Hwy in Australia; cruise around the Horn of South America; visit to Hawaii.

I know people that have cabins in the North Carolina mountains and only go there for there annual vacations. I can't imagine doing that at all.

At age 68, it’s not realistic to assume I will be back. If I really love someplace I can go back (assuming I stay healthy etc.), but that means giving up going someplace new.

I used to have a long list if places I want to return to, but it is getting shorter because there are so many places I want to see that I haven’t been to yet.

As for Ricks advice to assume you will return… Even if you won’t be able to return, it’s not necessarily bad advice. It might keep you from running yourself ragged and being too tired to enjoy your trip. Or it might keep you from fretting over every place you didn’t have time to see.

You can’t do it all, so just enjoy what you can do. It was hard for me to learn this lesson when I was younger. But once I accepted that I’m not going to see everything in the world that I want to, I happily adopted this as my motto.

Carroll - my mantra for foreign travel has always been “you can’t do it all”! I think by ‘leaving something for next time’ it is an optimistic way of believing that, yes, one day you’ll be back. But advancing years, declining disposable funds and maybe waning will (the latter hasn’t caught up with me as yet), make the likelihood slimmer by the year.

But I travel hopefully, so at the moment, you never know. Mitigating against that is that there is still so much to see and do!

Ian

I don't know what Rick means exactly, but I assume he may be saying that you could have a higher-quality trip if you don't treat it as your "one" or "rare-in-a-lifetime" opportunity because it removes all the pressure of trying to make it "perfect" or trying to cram too much in. You can even be completely honest with yourself and know full well that you would not return, but still take it slower and with a quality-over-quantity frame of mind. I don't think that's crazy at all. On the other hand, overcramming and overplanning a trip (or putting too much pressure on its sucess) can make it pretty unsatisfying, even if it's your only time at some destination. It's not realistic to think you will see everything you want in a single trip anyway, so why pretend otherwise? You just have to prioritize and makes sure you won't have regrets if you never return.

Agnes, well said. Instead of running oneself ragged cramming in all of the must-sees in Paris in 48 hours, perhaps time would be better spent absorbing fewer locations. At the same time I get it -- travelers who don't anticipate returning want as much bang for their buck as possible.

As part of my post-trip reflections, I make a list of "things to do next visit." When a place I've already been to fits nicely into a new itinerary, I can pull up that list and see how much time I'd like to spend on my return visit.

I enjoy the mix of revisiting a place - which feels comfortable and easy - with a predominance of "new" on the itinerary.

I rarely repeat a location unless transportation demands it. I always like something new, but I will admit I have a few places I will return in the future. I treat travel like a buffet, sample a lot and when it is time to slow down, focus on the favorites.

Travel like you’ll be back doesn’t mean you literally think you WILL be back. That’s dependent on all sorts of things, money, age, time, philosophy on repeating destinations, and luck. The saying to me is more about how to look at your trip. Do you want to run around worried that you will miss your one chance to see x,y,z or do you want to slow down, enjoy your priority of y and figure maybe you will get to z another time? Whether you actually do return is beside the point. It’s more about slowing down and not trying to jam everything in out of a “once in a lifetime” mindset. The best once in a lifetime memories are often in the more low key moments anyway, at least for me.

Whether this is a GOOD philosophy is another question. I feel like I have taken it too far and missed things I might have liked but that realistically I’ll never get back to.

It also makes more sense on a choosing destination scale. You have 2 weeks, do you do the 10 cities in 14 days death march or do you pick 3-4 places in the same or neighboring countries and enjoy more of a focus. If you pick Italy and end up dropping France, well that’s fine - assume you will be back. It makes less sense if you do something like skip a top museum thinking you will return to the city. You might not. If you don’t care that much about the museum, that’s one thing, but if you will regret skipping it then maybe assuming you will return isn’t the best.

I find it ironic that RS says that, but runs his tours the way he does. I've only been on one, and loved it, but it left me wanting more in some locations, namely the Dordogne region and Cote d'Azur. I guess it can depend on your mode of travel. Our first two European adventures were via Cruise and I'd have been frustrated by lack of exploring time if I hadn't heeded the advice of a friend to accept what a cruise is and make a list of the places I want to visit again for a longer period.

I was still a college senior when going over the first time in the summer of 1971, never occurred to me that this 12 week solo trip was going to be it...period. While I was over there, almost exclusively in Germany, I knew I would come back on another trip, as soon as I got the next opportunity, ie, after finishing grad school before doing another trip, a self-imposed reward and additional incentive. I had to anyway since this first trip didn't include Paris. Two years later I went again, SFO to Paris and after that week, Germany again and Prague.

All the trips include the new and some old familiar places, two in particular stand out to be visited on every trip or just about, Paris and Berlin. Unthinkable not to return / revisit Berlin, but Paris I have missed it a few times...not anymore.

I travel in Europe now believing I will return, ie staying healthy, etc. My travel budget is limited but directed at going back to Europe in general. I know I can go a lot more cheaply, ie, staying exclusively in hostels in dorm rooms, the absolute cheapest, a lot more picnics at dinner, more night trains, , ie but this also cuts into the level of min comfort.

One has to choose, basically it comes down to that....see DC or New York over and over or see Paris or London or Berlin.

It probably has different meaning to different people. Sometimes these questions are asked and then we try to stuff everyone into four or five categories. But ever response is almost unique. The reality is that travel decisions driven by personality of the individual or the couple. Our first trip in 72 to Europe was totally unplanned with four day notice and no passports. The first day in London I was surprised when my wife of four years says, "We will see that next time." "Next time ??" And over the next ten days that was her frequent response and I just fell into the groove of says, "Ya, next time." Next time was 21 years later ('93) for our 25th anniversary. Since then we have been pretty regular visitors.

What I notice is that some posters put a enormous amount of stress into their planning. Constantly ask the question, " Is this too much?" But my guess is that they may well do the same thing with their routine life planning. Some people do not deal well with flexibility. Maybe it is a sense of control. I have a sister-in-law who absolutely falls apart when something does not go the way she planned it. There is never a plan B with her. And, we are often accused of having no plan. But, same SIL says, "You are just lucky. Things always break your way!" But we always have a plan and part of that plan is -- No Plan.

Now we tend to visit old sites at the beginning and drift to new territory at the end. Almost always have a cruise or a pretty relaxing period in the middle or towards the end of our travels. We like to return to former sits just because it is more relaxing especially to start a trip. It is a way to ease into our European travel mode and deal with a little jet lag and then on to new adventures. We all develop our own travel style that serves our interests and personalities, As long as it works for you should be the primary test.

Our first trip in 2010, we crammed a lot into 23 nights: 7 locations in Italy. Since then, we have adhered to that mantra and frequently discuss during a trip the places we do want to return to in the future and those about which we would say “once and done.” We have found ourselves going back time-after-time to our favorites, our happy places, but we always include somewhere new, an expanded stay in a location we only touched on lightly, or seek out places within the area that are new-to-us.

Longer stays are an entirely different experience than the normal 3 night stay whether in a large city or a smaller town. Two weeks in the Alps gives one an incredible vacation and a full week in Venice makes one appreciate that strange and lovely city that a 3 night stay will not do.

Rick’s “Assume you will be Back” is consolation for not seeing everything in the short time someone has the first time somewhere. It also suggests that it’s OK to move on to yet another place on the same trip, seeing a bit of it, before moving onward. See lots of places, at least a little in each place, then return if/when you can for a more thorough visit.

With the time, funds, and prioritization for going places, we have been able to revisit. For a few years, it seemed as if Nice, France was the only place I went. Now, maybe I won’t be back for some time. We just got home this week from an African safari (wow, was that new and different!) and I’ve already been considering how, and when, to return to Botswana on another trip. But there’s also Scandinavia that’s calling. And this fall, we already have reservations for the exact same apartments in Rome, and in southwestern Tuscany, where we stayed last fall.

Go back to some familiar places, and add new discoveries. That’s almost like having your favorite cake, and getting to eat it, too, with some new flavor ice cream on the side.

Like most older posters, time is our enemy. Turning 65 this year and still have a long list. But, after so many trips we have learned to slow down, stay longer, and not worry if we miss something. We were in krakow for 6 nights and never got to
See the Lady with Ermine. But we did take a pierogi class, tried glass blowing, waited on line with locals for kielbasa from the Blue Van, had dinner through eat away at a lovely woman’s home, you get the picture. Fun things, lots of laughs. We return to
Croatia once a year now to Visit family but I always throw in a small town to visit for a day or two. This June will be Karvalac. At this point in our life we want to have fun on our trips, no stress.

A lot of interesting, thoughtful, and entertaining perspectives here. I wonder what percentage of people who visit Europe, a small minority I would think, are able to return either financially or otherwise? Let's say a family or couple has a budget of 10K to 15K, or whatever, for a couple of weeks in France. I'm guessing not many people can afford to spend that much money very often. In that event I could understand packing more stuff in, within reason, compared to repeat visitors.

Something else to consider: When we were young a busy but fun day for us would be a "death march" for others.

Money is naturally the big issue, if not the deciding factor. I hardly ever take a taxi in Europe. That is an additional expense that could be eliminated, relative to the situation at hand. Stay near a train station you cut out the taxi expense to/from the airport or hotel to train station.

One reason for my staying at Paris Gare du Nord, admittedly, very few Americans are seen there; the tourists. visitors are other Europeans, Indians, or other Asians, (you wonder why/), a junction for bus lines and the 2 Metro lines and the RER from CDG. .... likewise in Hamburg and Munich, the S-Bahn goes to Hamburg airport and MUC.

One has to balance the level of comfort or luxury one wants with one's desire to sacrifice, ie, to do without, such as AC, elevator, etc. if the budget is limited and your bottom line is to return to Europe as often as possible. My standard is to stay in B&B, and small hotels and Pensionen walkable to the train station.

It’s more about slowing down and not trying to jam everything in out of a “once in a lifetime” mindset.

Mira hits the spot for me. I just want to enjoy my time.

However, at the time of my first trip to Europe, I was convinced I would not get there, let alone ever go again. I had dreamed of going to Europe my whole childhood and arranged it my senior year in college between semesters for almost a month. And as my dream was coming true, I was convinced something would happen and I would never get there. In fact the night before I was flying out, my doctor called and had me rush in for some additional blood tests in the morning. My mother talked to him when those results came in by noon, and the dr said to let me go and an hour later I was at the airport. I didn't know it at the time, but they thought I had leukemia. I went and have returned many, many times. So, every one is a gift.

I have always returned to most countries so my countries are limited, but countries are large. I don't want to hit Paris and say I've been to France, etc. (And I will return to Paris as many times that I can before I die!)
I've been working on my bucket list for some time...since 1976, and I guess it is fairly limited compared to other people, but I like to get to know a place. It's all a matter of personality. I like to know a place. Others like to touch places. Others like to count places. There's no right or wrong.

As far as money is concerned, I've always felt it costs less to vacation in Europe than it does to vacation in the USA. That's assuming independent travel, which is mainly what we do...but I love the value of my RS tour as well. They are just different. So, I do travel like I'll be back again, as I have many times, but sometime will be the last, but I don't want to know when that is! I'm 68 and I'd like to think I have another 15 years, easy. At the end at worst, I will hobble into Paris and spend the day at the closest cafe just watching people. All is good.

We'll all be back again as long as we've thrown a coin in the Trevi fountain, right? Right?!

roubrat, according to science and the laws of physics, yes.

On going to countries only once in Europe: since the second decade of the 21st century, I have been back to every country not merely for reasons of transit but visiting a place or site, with two exceptions , Belgium and Sweden, not necessarily by design either.

Obviously, numerous small towns and cities I have no desire to revisit in Germany, France, Austria, but on the other hand, there are numerous places in Germany I always feel drawn to and/or want to revisit: (Kiel, Neustrelitz, Potsdam, Munich, Weimar, Eutin/Holstein, Berlin, Schwerin, Lüneburg, etc). In France....Paris, Amiens, Bayeux, Fontainebleau, Strasbourg, Arras, etc. Likewise in Poland and England plus Austria.

I take it to mean that you can’t do it all on one trip, so it’s ok to miss things. I’ve seen some travel plans that look more like a military drill than a vacation.

I’ll have some thoughts on my my current U.K. trip once I get home. It definitely required me to be extremely flexible with my plans

Dale: looking forward to your trip report.

Some places have a very strong hold on me and thus I have already visited more than once, and will likely return before going to other places for the first time: Budapest 5, London 4, Vienna 3, Tallinn 2. Ideally I try to combine new places with an old favorite, but this year, for my first international trip in 2.5 years, London was the only place I considered, I needed somewhere absolutely familiar yet delightful...I don't think I will ever tire of England, so much yet to see.

Wherever I go I make a point to see what is truly important to me, in case I never do get to--or want to--return.

Christa: "You really got a hold on me." That's a song lyric, I think. Maybe it's, "You're gonna lose that girl" by The Beatles, but I think that's a different song.

BigMikeWestByGodVirginia, I think you're thinking of Smoky Robinson. https://youtu.be/AdDnqSFYXFs

::We'll all be back again as long as we've thrown a coin in the Trevi fountain, right? Right?!

roubrat, is that what the magnetic pull between myself and Rome is? I don't know whether I should go fish my penny out or dump in a bag of change.

When I saw the thread title, I thought of it more as in one's conduct in the places we visit. I cannot afford, with either time or money, to assume I can return to places it took me 20 years to get to. When I prioritize what we will see and do, I definitely consider what I would regret missing and move it to the top of the list; but I also know that my judgment can only take me so far since the unexpected often becomes the best memory.

When I think of traveling as though I'll be back, I think about treating everyone I encounter as though I will see them again. About leaving apartments, hotels and restaurants how I'd want someone to leave them if I was coming next. This meant booking time on the rooftop at T Fondaco in Venice since we won't be staying somewhere with a view, but allowing the opportunity to slip by when the attendant insists our reservation is fake. I'm not sure why one would fake something that's totally free, but there's no way we would have enjoyed the view after arguing our way onto the terrace anyhow.

It's an impossible goal, of course. It's hard to be chill when you have so much invested and want to make sure it's "worth it". And, by definition, one is ignorant of what they are ignorant of, so there are always faux pas, but I make an effort and insist my kids do.

roubrat - while I defer to no man in my admiration of Smokey Robinson (and indeed, his Miracles) most of us on this side of the pond first got acquainted with ‘You Really Got A Hold On Me’ when it was covered by the Fab Four. In fact The Beatles helped popularise US music here to some extent with their covers of the originals - see ‘Anna’, ‘Please Mister Postman’, ‘Roll Over Beethoven’, ‘Honey Don’t’, etc., etc. As has been noted before the port status of Liverpool meant it was an easy access point for records to be brought over from the USA which had been hitherto unheard of or just plain unavailable in the U.K.

roubrat: What a great song by a great singer. I miss the old Motown sound.

Smokey Robinson was thrilled to be covered by the Fab Four. The Beatles did a fine job in covering "Twist and Shout" and "Please Mr. Postman," of all songs, not to mention "Anna" and "A Taste of Honey." My first proper album purchase was "Sgt Pepper." Wow.

Like many others, I'm running out of time relative to the places I still want to see, so I lean towards the new but am not adverse to doing a repeat if the opportunity presents itself or if new just won't work out ... but I do think there is a third choice, a hybrid of 'new yet familiar' ... I have been to Munich 4 times (Oktoberfest twice, once for their Christmas Market and once in late May on our family trip) ... all 3 times were a different, new experience ... I didn't do the things I had done on a previous visit due to the times of the year I was there, so while I was somewhat familiar with the locale, it was new ...

Speaking of Beatles songs, from A Hard Day’s Night, there’s “I’ll Be Back.”

. . . But I’ll be back again . . . I wanna Go,
But I hate to leave you, You know I hate to leave you, Oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh . . . But I'll be back again. . .

So that settles it - plan to come back, even if situations make it highly unlikely. John’s gone, George too … but Paul turns 80 exactly a month from today. He and Ringo don’t seem to be going away any time soon. But then, if you don’t go, you can’t come back. Still, travel, and look forward to returning … some day.

Then again, Smokey & The Miracles have recorded “I’ll Try Something New,” not to mention “Shop Around” !!!

Cyn, I'm still trying to figure out the amazing chord that opens "Hard Day's Night." Can you help? E-flat?

Perfect juxtaposition of Lennon singing the verse with McCartney in the chorus.

We had such a great time in Liverpool, between the Scouse attitude and humor, and visiting the Beatle homes.

On McCartney's last tour he said he would be back, and indeed he "Got Back." On this tour he says, "See you next time," which is perhaps less committal?

Mike -

Re the opening chord to ‘A Hard Day’s Night’. I’ve read that it’s an F with a G on the first string played by George alone on his Rickenbacker 12 string. However, as with all things Beatles it’s likely more complicated as this You Tube piece illustrates - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNnIPpLZaUg

I’m strictly a non musician (“He thought that Rickenbacker was a pilot, he couldn’t tell a Gretsch from a Les Paul…..”), but I’m intrigued by how they did all that stuff!

Ian

Thank you, IanandJulie. Cool stuff. Don't get me started on the feedback of "I Feel Fine" along with Ringo's outstanding drumming on that track. "Rain" is Ringo's masterpiece.