Rebecca & Wray......
Make it easy, seriously just pack carry-on....you can do it. We've done it many times.
For the dressy nights, here's the trick:
Ankle-length black knit skirt and a plain black top (long-sleeve light t-shirt if summer, heavier t-shirt or dress sweater if winter/spring/or chilly evening weather). Take a choker of pearls and then a princess length of pearls, and take 2-3 dressy shawls (some of which can also flip to scarves). Plain black ballet flats, and you are pretty much set for even a black-tie evening :) Have done it many times!!! It works. Black is black, knits are wrinkle-free....splash of color with the shawls (use a very, very light-weight one for summer).
For men, it's a bit trickier. Most cruise lines that still do the formal nights (although many have now dropped them) have black-tie optional. If your guys want to do the tux bit, the biggest pain is lugging those darn dress shoes for men. But, with a sports coat and trousers, the second pair of loafers can work for semi-formalish nights. For lugging a tie, what I have found works best for packing is to roll the tie in a half sheet of tissue paper (using the tissue paper for the point part that actually shows) then putting that in a round plastic tupperware-like container (certain size small sour cream/yogurt containers also work great)......perfect, no smooshed or wrinkled tie. Or, if your guys are comfortable with a bow tie, that's even easier.
But, Wray, you are right, normally there are dining venues that offer the non-formal option (or there is always room service) for those who don't want to lug the tux stuff. On our last Silversea cruise, on formal night, we arranged for our butler to serve us dinner (with the couple with whom we were traveling, along with the Global Perspectives speaker) in the lounge right up in front of the ship with huge windows, while we sailed out of St. Petersburg. We timed it for 20 minutes after all the pre-dinner guests had cleared out, and we had the most wonderful, quiet, lovely dinner and the on-board speaker was fascinating one-on-one., pointing out sights to us that no one else knew to look for that night (since they were all in the main dining room or elsewhere on formal night). Sometimes those special set-ups are available just for the asking ;)
No one else will remember what you wore.
