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Recent HS graduation solo female trip

I would like to buy my daughter a solo trip around western Europe (Ireland, Scotland, England, maybe Belgium, etc.) for graduation. She will be timid about finding her own way, but makes friends easily. I was looking into some of the hostel tours and would like to know what people think about them. My daughter won't be 18 until the end of Sept next year so we are looking at October 2015 for the start of her trip. I would like for her to spend at least a month there. She doesn't know a second language so places with strong English are a must. I am also looking at getting her rail passes. Any advice would be wonderful!

Posted by
7277 posts

Sounds like an exciting opportunity! I can't offer any first-hand thoughts about hostel tours, although having a group setting with knowledgeable guides would seem to offer more security than simply having her strike out on her own for the whole trip.

Western Belgium (and Holland, too) speak English widely, and are both great bicycling countries, if that helps - we did a great bike tour on own own in June 2008.

Knowing at least a few basic foreign words and phrases (please, thank you, good morning, where are the toilets) can help immensely - even in Ireland, Scotland, and England :-D -- and having a phrase book or electronic translation resource could help make her trip more worthwhile.

Although trains were a primary component of our first several trips, and we still use them, cheap flights (on easyJet, Ryanair, etc.) are increasingly available for getting around Europe, and might offer an option for moving around quickly and/or inexpensively for part of the trip. Of course, the Eurostar train (which has discounts if you purchase early) can get her from England to Belgium fast, as well.

Posted by
16893 posts

Will this be her first trip to Europe? Any smart, aware person can travel alone in Europe, with advance preparation, preferably starting with reading Europe Through the Back Door. I don't know that it's common for 18-year-old young ladies to make their first trips solo. Back in the day, Rick took his first after-high school trip with his best buddy, and had also visited previously with his parents. My first solo trip to Europe (three weeks in Great Britain) was when I was 25, and I had previously warmed up by making a few solo trips in the USA. (It was a success, so the next year, I tool off for six months in Europe, when visa agreements allowed such a thing.)

See also:

Tips for traveling solo: http://www.ricksteves.com/travel-tips/trip-planning

Audio: Rick & Gene recall 1973

There's not much need to think about rail passes before the itinerary is planned. Passes for Great Britain are separate from those for Ireland (which has more limited train routes) or the continent.

Posted by
9363 posts

You describe her as "timid". How street smart is she? Does she want to do this, particularly solo? I have traveled alone there, but not taken a tour. I have heard that some of the hostel tours can be very, um, party-oriented - how will she handle herself around alcohol and people who have been drinking? Solo travel is fun but can also be lonely at times, and a month is a very long time to be away from home on a first trip. You need to have a discussion along the lines of "what will you do if..." to see how comfortable she will be alone. It's not for everyone.

Posted by
2261 posts

It's an excellent idea, as long as she is enthusiastic about it, and is completely integral to the planning process, i.e., not handed an itinerary and told 'here's where you're going'. I would second Nancy's cautions in view of the fact that you said she is timid. Perhaps there is a well-chosen friend she could invite who would enhance her experience. I agree that a full month could be overly long for a first, and solo, trip, depending on the person.
Apart from that, I would point out that Paris, as a true world city, would be a good choice as well. A few words of French will easily get you by in central Paris. It's a very safe city and has a ton to offer.
Rail pass is probably not necessary, it seems hard to make them pay, and they add complexity.

Good on you for doing it!

Posted by
7126 posts

I'm agreeing with comments already mentioned and wondering if she would feel comfortable spending a couple of weeks in the USA in an unfamiliar town - as a comparison.

IF it is something that she is desiring, I would recommend that you move the date up to summer when more people her age are traveling in Europe. Also, if she's timid, what better way than a RS tour for her to feel part of a group immediately without the scariness of a timid person finding her own way. I'd start by showing her the tours and see what interests her. A 2nd language isn't necessary if she's traveling with a RS group, so it would broaden her options.

Posted by
551 posts

Great gift and I'm sure she will appreciate it more than you will ever know. There are already some good comments so I will try not to be redundant, except to echo Laura’s suggestion that you get her a copy of Europe Through the Back Door. It should be noted that this is not a guide book in the true sense of the word, but THE textbook for traveling in Europe, especially for a new traveler. It is meant to be read and used before and during the planning of a trip, not after you get there. There are other guide books for that purpose.
I have a few questions. Did your daughter choose the countries you listed or did you? Was it only because they speak English there? If so, while there are many good reasons to go to all of them, language is not one of them. There is no appreciable language barrier in most of Europe if you can master a small group of local phrases to use when needed.
If you did pick them for that reason I’d suggest you ask your daughter to tell you what was her favorite country that she studied in school and does she have any travel dreams of her own. When my son was 15 and a high school sophomore he came home one night and asked if we would go with him to a meeting at school about becoming a foreign student. Seems his German teacher thought he was an excellent candidate to go to Switzerland and live with a local family for a year. After recovering from the initial shock we did go, and because he was able to choose the country and exchange program he had the most rewarding year of his life to that point. I can tell you from personal experience that your daughter will get much more out of the trip if it is some place that SHE wants to see.
Since this is a solo trip for your daughter I echo others who highly recommend a Rick Steves tour. You might suffer sticker shock when you first see the price, but look at all you get for the money and what you DON’T have to pay for that you do on other tours. And regardless of where your daughter wants to go in Europe there is a RS tour that goes there. Good luck.

Posted by
2 posts

Thank you for all the information guys. To answer some of the questions, I must say first of all that my daughter does not know anything about this yet. I have a limited budget (about $6000) and don't want to bring it up to her until I have an idea of what she should do. She has no idea that anything like this would ever be possible for us to afford, let alone me offer it up to her. We have traveled here in the states to various cities where we have utilized the subways, buses, etc so I don't feel that will be a problem for her. I was limiting the suggestions to English speaking countries, just because I think it would make her more comfortable. I don't want her to go there alone, but unfortunately we can't afford for anyone else to go-that is why I was looking into pre-planned trips so she would only have to worry about getting from city to city, not planning out her whole itinerary. She is not planning on going to college right away, so I want her to experience more than the drudgery of working everyday and hanging out with the same people she has been around for the last few years. I'm not looking for parenting advice, I wouldn't force my daughter into doing this if she didn't want to. I just need a "skeleton" of a plan before I present this to her and have an idea of what I can offer her.

Posted by
11507 posts

Ok first off.. rail passes are not the be all end all.. in fact they can be economically poor choices.. and some trains require reservations ( even with the pass) and charge an extra fee. So.. I would skip that idea.. find 3-4 places she wants to visit and buy point to point tickets.

I would also involve her in planning.. really .

Also.. I would not limit it to English speaking places only as most big spots ( Rome, Paris , etc) still have enough tourist English spoken she will manage just fine.

I do think 4 weeks may be a bit much for someone alone on her first trip, especially if she is timid.
However if you she stays a week in each place.. at a well reviewed hostel.. she will be able to meet other young folks to bum around with a bit.. very hard to do if she only stays in places a night or two..

I think London, Dublin, Amsterdam are all easy.. but would also suggest Amsterdam and Paris.

OF course she may have completely different wish list.. which is why she really needs to know about this so she can do research herself.. which will also help her feel more confident on the trip , shes done the homework and will have a better idea of what to expect.

There are some good hostels.. and some less then desirable ones. So pick an itinerary then do the research for those..

I think its a great idea.. but I really wonder if you let her know well in advance she may be able to find a friend to come along.. give her a chance anyways.

Good luck.. I think your heart is in the right place.. but Europe is large.. and she is not experienced.. so do listen to some of the advice.. does not mean you have to follow it all though..

Posted by
11507 posts

PS I also do not think every kid has to trot off to college right away.. or at all.. .its not for everyone.

Posted by
7277 posts

Rick Steves' guides are tops, especially for prioritizing sights and activities, and for making the most of one's time and budget, and are full of hints and suggestions for experiencing the culture in new places. Prospective travelers should also watch his 3-part Travel Skills videos with more information to help make for a successful trip.

Other guidebooks that might help in the planning process include Lonely Planet, Rough Guide, and Let's Go!, which lean a bit more to a student/young adult orientation. Let's Go! books are written by Harvard University students, but don't contain nearly as much detailed info about experiencing a place as Rick. Rick's books don't cover every place on earth, though, which is why other guides are often needed, but again, for the places you outlined above, his books are the best. He also updates annually, while Lonely Planet books tend to come out every few years, and Rough Guide is the same. All or many of them might be available for loan thru your library for a test-drive, without having to invest in a substantial guidebook collection for starters.

Posted by
32171 posts

tish,

I'm not sure if it would work with her age, but perhaps she could tag along on the same tour as this group.....

https://community.ricksteves.com/travel-forum/tours/22-year-olds-on-boe-21-day-tour

It's great that you're doing your "homework" before presenting this to your daughter. If she's "timid", a tour may be the best idea on this first trip. I agree with Laura - don't bother about rail passes or things like that until you're got a more detailed plan in place.

I'll ponder this for a bit, and may have some further comments later.

Posted by
15560 posts

Spend some time looking through hostelworld.com . You can locate hostels by city, then browse the information . . . prices, descriptions, reviews. This will give you a pretty good idea of a budget for lodging. Some hostels offer day tours.

It's pretty easy to manage anywhere in Europe in English, especially in cities, though it helps to learn a couple of phrases to use - hello, please, thank you, etc. just to be friendly and polite. On my first visit to Belgium, many years ago, it seemed like no one spoke English, on a visit a couple of years ago, everyone seemed to know English - at least enough to deal with tourists.

Lastly, I'm with those who suggest including your daughter in the planning sooner than later. You have set the dollar limit. Together you can work on where to go and for how long. Your daughter may even want to save or earn some of her own money to add to the trip.

Posted by
1954 posts

Tishingleton – Nevertheless I have the idea that your plan is basically still patronizing and keep doing that, I think you won’t make here independent even if you finance a trip to the moon. At eighteen most want to find their own way in life. With this plan you give the impression you want to make her independent, but you give also the impression to want to control that. That’s the contradiction I see. I think it must be clear you are going to accept here independence in the first place and for that she will go make up her own mind, many things you won’t agree with, but that are the growing pains.......

Painfull opinion: Stop doing the thinking work for her.

Posted by
11613 posts

I think it's a beautiful idea for a gift. It sounds like you are doing some preliminary research and plan to talk to her about it once you have some options. My suggestion would be to look at the RS tours first, look at some scrapbooks on this site, and perhaps cut the time down to 21-22 days or so. Most tour with people her age would take place during the summer months.

Have you thought about a shorter mother-daughter trip?

Again, a great idea.

Posted by
121 posts

I don't have the links, but a good google search would find links for what I'm suggesting here: A co-worker of mine does hiking tour groups with his wife. They did one in Ireland a year or so ago; they will do one next year in Iceland. Also, a few years back, on my flight home from Rome, I sat next to 2 women who had just done a bicycle tour with a tour group of rural Italy. I believe these tours are usually 10 days to 2 weeks. For her first trip it may be preferable.

Another thing she could do is: do a hiking (or biking) trip in Ireland (or where-ever) first, and then after the group trip is over she could stay in Dublin (for example) by herself for another week; or go on to England/Scotland for a week or so. The group would give her a taste before she does her own thing. While she is with the group, she can ask the guides for advice for her subsequent travels. She may even meet people on the group tour that she can travel with for a couple of days after.

Also, my understanding is these groups arrange all the hotel stays and most of the meals. So, it may save her some stress as she gets used to European travel.

On my first trip to Europe, I traveled a month by myself in Germany and Austria when I was 20--but I had been there as an exchange student for 2 months or so first before I traveled. Those two months with a host family got me acclimated before I ventured out on my own. So a group trip followed by some solo travel may suit her.

Posted by
2081 posts

tlshingleton,

This is just my opinion. I think the gift trip idea is great, but i would think about letting your daughter in on the secret. She may have different ideas on where to go/do/see things and she may not feel as shy about going to someplace that doesnt have English as a primary language.

Also, from my experience and where i have traveled to so far, i have been able to get by with my English and limited local language. i do try to learn some of the local lingo to be polite and such, but in the end, ive made it out alive of everywhere i have been - so far.

Also, getting outside of your comfort zone is good and helps for the next trip.

good luck in whatever happens.

happy trails.

Posted by
8091 posts

There are very few 17 year olds, male or female, that are truly ready for a solo trip to Europe.

My first trip was when I was 20 years old--with my university. They took 200 students for an residence program at the University of Innsbruck where we stayed in the dorms. We took weekend trips to Venice, Vienna, Munich and Switzerland. And I still return every few years to the mountains I truly love.

If your daughter's going to college, I would suggest you try to find a university that is going to have a trip for credit to Europe. She'd find others on such a trip to pal up with, and the trip would be a much safer proposition.

Posted by
2597 posts

It took me until I was 45 to feel confident enough to travel to Europe alone, and when I did I started with London and Edinburgh and had a fabulous time. The part about her being timid makes me nervous, if you're alone you need to be able to speak up and ask questions or who knows what all might happen--it could be an adventure, or something scary could result.

A month seems like a long time, too, given her age and lack of world experience. I suggest 2 weeks at most and perhaps keeping it to England and Scotland, fly in to London, train to Edinburgh and then home from there or a bit of traveling by train in between the two big cities.

When I graduated our parents sent me and my best friend to Honolulu, we were still 17 and had fake IDs so we could drink and thought we were a big deal, though we couldn't get into trouble no matter how hard we tried.

Posted by
1806 posts

Interesting to see the armchair parenting advice from people who don't know your daughter at all. I strongly disagree with sending an 18 year old on a Rick Steves' Tour. Sure, they have "family" tours (but no guarantee the other younger people will even be remotely close to her age - she could be on a tour with a bunch of 12 year olds and their parents). Watch the Rick Steves' Tour Video and take a good look at those groups - the average age seems to skew around 55-65.

Agree that rail passes might not be the best method to get from place to place (but it depends on what countries make the final cut). Rather than an organized "tour", you may want to get her a ticket on some hop-on/hop-off backpackers bus circuit. It's a good way to get from city to city but gives her the flexibility of staying as long as she likes in one place before moving on as buses will come through daily. It's also a good way to meet lots of different solo backpackers from all over who tend to be younger - 18 to late 20s seems to make up the age range - she'll still be a bit on the young side, but at least she'll have more in common with someone in their early 20s vs. a group that is middle-aged or seniors. Many backpackers bus circuits also will help book a bed for your daughter at their preferred hostels, so she can have someone else make the arrangements and not have to worry about where she will sleep when she gets to the next town. She could also do a combo of a bus tour (ex. Paddy Wagon Tours in Ireland) for a week or two and then head someplace where the rail connections are short, easy and fairly cheap. For example: London to Paris to Belgium to Amsterdam is all easily connected by trains, has good signage (in both languages in France, Belgium & Netherlands) and a large portion of the population (particularly those 45 and under) speaks pretty decent English, so she doesn't need to stress about finding her way around. She could easily spend a full month on that - a week in London with a day trip, week in Paris with a day trip, base in one city in Belgium (like Ghent) and take local commuter trains to other cities like Brussels, Bruges, Antwerp, move over to Amsterdam for a week and take some day trips to other places like Utrecht, Rotterdam, etc.

There are more younger people traveling during summer months, but there are also some hostels that won't let her stay alone if she's 17 (some will, some won't - so check carefully if you book a trip before she turns 18). You might also want to think of sending her somewhere outside of Europe. Australia and New Zealand are full of solo backpackers from all around the world taking gap years, both have excellent hostels and plenty of backpacker bus circuits that make getting around a breeze. There is no language barrier and the seasons are reversed, so our Fall & Winter is actually their Spring & Summer. The exchange rate is fairly equal for Australia and actually skews in your favor for New Zealand.

Posted by
9363 posts

The main problem with the suggestion of Australia or New Zealand would be the airfare, since they have limited funds.

Posted by
11507 posts

Stick her on a Contiki tour.. she will be with all young folks,, and have a blast.. ( my nephew who lived in a very rural area up here,, never even been on a public bus , took a tour with them only a few weeks after graduation and turning 18) . He was/is a timid type person too.. even has a bit of a stutter.. but he made friends quickly on the tour.
She may even see Europe( the tours are whirlwind, and tend to party type atmosphere.. but nephew made friends for life ( he is 24 now) that he still travels to States to visit ) ..

Posted by
1520 posts

First, your desire to make a financial sacrifice in order to open the world up to her is to be applauded.
Second, ignore the parenting comments as I suspect you have done well for so many years without the need for such guidance.
Third, do you think she would enjoy having the opportunity to jointly plan the trip?
Fourth, October is a great month to travel.
Fifth, does the $6k include the cost of airfare?
Sixth, a month is a long time for seasoned travelers to be on the road. A challenge will be lugging her own luggage to all points, without a partner it can get tiring.
Seventh, perhaps you may desire to toss this idea directly to a Rick Steves travel expert via a phone call. They may be able to craft a financial rewarding memory creating journey by connecting several tours together.
Regardless of the result, kudos for desiring to open the world to your daughter!