People that don't travel

My sister refuses to fly, which greatly limits her travel options. Her rationale is that she has panic attacks. I lived in SC for 25 years and only went to MB once, for a professional conference. WV to SC is a long drive!

Tucson to Seattle. Seattle to Indianapolis. Seattle to Elkhart Lake WI. And back from all those to the starting points. Now those are long drives!

My husband did all those last summer for his racing. I was only along for the Tucson to Seattle and return drives. I flew to the other locations to join him and flew back to Tucson.

He opted out of European travel after our trip in 2014. He really hates to fly. Even though he retired after 27 years with Boeing. Even though our son is a Captain with SkyWest. Go figure.

Most of my friends and family who don't travel say they don't because they can't afford it. Not one of them is poor. I say they choose to spend their money on other things. One of my former work colleagues once asked me how I could afford to travel. I looked out in the restaurant parking lot and pointed to her BMW. Our daily driver is a 2005 Toyota Highlander with over 205,000 miles on it.

You can learn a lot about a person from how they spend their time and their money.

Just a little story from another part of history: when Berlin Wall was opening up of course people explored the other side of the city for a sunny Sunday walk but it needed a lot of time to make people more confident about the other side to even have a lunch, a dinner or even visiting an opera or museum.

Big exception was the young techno scene - even all the other young scenes stayed in their eastern and western part of the city for the first 2-3 years.

One additional info and irony: people from West Germany still needed a visa with a complicated application form in the first weeks after opening (still two countries) while people from East Germany were allowed to travel freely - visa when crossing the border.

What a time :-)

Everyone is different with different interests and priorities. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying to go to the same nearby spot every year for vacation. There’s nothing wrong with not liking to travel at all. There’s nothing wrong with liking to travel to Europe and not to nearby places. Whatever floats your boat. Just be glad everyone doesn’t like to do the same thing or imagine how crowded these already crowded places would be!

I know people that haven't been more than 50 miles from where they were born.

Also, I know people that vacation to the same identical beach or mountain resort every year.

Some people thing Las Vegas, with all its fake Venice, Egypt, etc. is wonderful, to me it is tacky and crude. However, the shows are good and there are things outside the city to visit.

Travel is wonderful, I love it and continue to do it every year. I have been to 78 foreign countries and have much more to see and do. Life is an adventure and travel is at the top of the list for adventure.

Why don't some people travel beyond the tried and true, and familiar?

My recent travels in Europe have taken me further and further from my earlier travel comfort zones. Still, when I returned to Prague this past fall, it was nice to already know the currency, to already know my way around, to already know the transit system. There was a certain ease in having one destination on that trip that I didn't have to "figure out" from scratch.

I imagine that when my sense of adventure for new destinations reaches some peak, I'll be happy to have loads of "familiar" places in Europe that I can comfortably return to.

Not everything is for everybody.

There are a lot of people struggling to pay their bills in the US. Without being a downer, many people work two jobs and a trip to Disneyworld or car trip can be a once a year expense.
Add to that, plane tickets aren't exactly cheap anymore(traveled to Europe $395 roundtrip).

Finally travel doesn't really make you openminded. I have friends who go to Europe and other foreign countries that wouldn't set foot in a museum but sit in a beach resort drinking all day. And I have other acquaintances who have traveled the globe yet are the most close minded. Different strokes to different folks.

RE: Canada is not that much farther from Morgantown, but there's little interest in going there: "They speak French or something?"

While it may be true that approximately 20% of Canada's population speaks French, many more of us speak English (approximately 56% according to one source). So language is not a reason to rule out travelling to Canada ... there could be any number of reasons or preferences for destination choices.

However, it's interesting to note that US residents made 24 million trips to Canada in 2018. This was the fourth consecutive year of increased travel from the United States since 2014. Compare that to about 12 million US residents who travel to Europe annually... to each his own, as they say.

A few reasons. Realistically, to justify the cost, you need a minimum of ten days on the ground. In some offices, that’s almost impossible to get. Even if you have plenty of vacation time, negotiations for that much time off can be more complex than peace in the Middle East, especially if you have lots of coworkers who think vacation is 5 days at Disney for the kids and taking the boat out on the lake for a few 3 day weekends in the summer.

The insane worries about terrorism and crime abroad. Too many people get scared out of their minds every time there’s some incident on the news. They’re probably the most scared while driving home 20 miles over the speed limit after a couple of double gin and tonics at happy hour.

And, people are just different. My friend R is a wonderful person and a perfect wife to her husband. We’ve been friends all these years even though I’m passionate about politics and she’s never voted in her life and never will. I doubt she’s watched the news since 9/11. She and her husband take their main vacation at some all inclusive resort in Cancun and that’s all they’ll ever do. I hope they enjoy it and if I ever tag along, I’ll be the one leaving and going to explore the city.

But, I admit, I tend to return to the U.K. more often than my travel bug friends think I should. Part of the reason is because I’ve got so many friends there that I’ve made from traveling there and I want to see them. And, when they come to the USA, I’m either busy with work or they’re with family. And, it’s not like I can just pop over to California on a Friday night and be back in Chicago by Sunday night. I guess I could but that’s a lot of transit time and money just for maybe a day and a half and that’s assuming no flight delays.

Interesting question, and a bit uncertain, in part because of the forum in which the question is asked, as to whether the question is truly why don't some people travel or why don't some people travel abroad.

Travel requires a curiosity, money, a desire for excitement, and a willingness to experience something very different, which involves some risk of discomfort. For some, time away means a chance to relax, often with family. For those, time at a beach or a resort is the perfect vacation.

I fall in the former category. But increasingly, I am considering travel in this country more than travel abroad--not because travel in this country is so many ways easier, but because it seems evident that I do not know as much about this country and its diversity as I once thought and events in this country seem more interesting than those in nearly every other country.

Joel may have said it best, but I'll admit at first I thought "inchoate" was an Indian tribe from Oklahoma

Seriously? Sounds like a knock on my family and my state.

"They speak French or something." What's that something is what would ask to one saying that sentence.

It's exactly "they" speak French that I am traveling there, be it France or Quebec City on the priority list.

Sorry Mike, but Myrtle Beach is Pittsburgh South.

I have tried to get my step-sister to visit me in Germany for over 30 years now. She simply has no desire to see anything in Europe at all. Not Paris, not Rome, not London, nothing, nada. Her life revolves around her circle of friends, family, line dancing, bowling, and going fishing with her husband in Canada. I gave up asking her.
Now, my other step-sister from a different mother would love to come here, but her husband is afraid of security at the airport. Why? Because he looks Indian, even though he was born in the US. He is fearful of TSA and Homeland Security and doesn't want to be embarrassed by their possible questioning. I guess I would feel the same way if I looked like his family and had a nice Indian name.

Some people just like an ordinary regular no frills life with no surprises. Sometimes, that is all I want too. But other times I just want to travel. I like seeing how ordinary daily tasks are done differently elsewhere. I like discovering how to communicate with someone where neither of us speaks the other's language. I like trying different foods, whether I ever want them again is irrelevant. I like waking up in a different bed every morning.

Not traveling to me is like working at the same old job for my entire working life -- it is not for me. But if that is what makes someone happy, then I am OK with that. We are all different and should all do what makes us happy while we can.

What does it matter where people travel? She who pays the piper calls the tune. Whether someone visits Myrtle Beach or Omaha Beach, who is anyone to judge others?

It's hard to explain why some people don't like to venture too far out of their usual "comfort zone". I know people who travel to North American destinations for short trips or perhaps to Mexico / Cuba / Dominican Republic / Arizona / California in the winter, but they seem to have no desire to experience the culture and history of Europe. Their idea of a great holiday is sitting by the pool at an all-inclusive resort drinking fancy cocktails with an umbrella sticking out of the glass, or perhaps booking a spot at a "wrinkle ranch" in the south somewhere, and playing Bingo every afternoon.

In one case that comes to mind, one spouse is really interested in Europe but the other has no desire to go there. I thought I might pique the interest of the reluctant party by showing some incredible videos of the scenery and so on (Visions of Europe and RS videos). The reply at the end of the show was, "gee, thanks for showing me those, now I don't have to go there". So much for that idea!

It doesn't matter where people travel. I was simply curious about the motivations of doing more or less the same thing throughout one's life. This is about understanding, not condescension. In that light I've admitted to being rather low brow about where I eat, such as Subway and Applebees being just fine.

I lived in Heidelberg and then Bitburg for eight years and could never get my parents to visit. They never really explained why other than "one of these days."

A good friend loves Sandals all-inclusive resorts and sitting around drinking and eating, which would bore me to tears and leave me feeling awful.

My husband won’t travel. He’s just not interested. No amount of cajoling from me or friends will get him farther than a 2000 mile round trip road trip occasionally, always to see friends in the WA/OR. No cruises, no “foreign country”. Twice to Hawaii in 40 years was enough and then the highlight was seeing friends. I gave up. It’s not worth the battle. He doesn’t have fun. He’d rather putter in the garage with his old Studebakers while I can’t wait to go to (haven’t decided) next year.

Interesting discussion. I believe that, much like the eternally argued 'how to pack" discussion, the why and where people travel has no single correct answer. Grew up in NH, spent 2 years after college on a small island in the Western Pacific, have gone to the same beach in Maine for a week every summer for 30 years - taking my kids and now my grandkids, within the last 18 months have spent 3 weeks in Quebec Province and 3 weeks in China. Pack what you want and think you need in the way that seems best to you. Travel as you want to the places that seem best to you. There just isn't a BEST way.

Emma, you made me laugh because I said almost that to my mother, who has no idea why my sister and I love to travel. I told her that with things the way they are at our jobs nowadays (both public service, me in a public library, her a school principal in Ontario) is it any wonder that whenever we have a bit of time off we try to get as far away as possible?

But to answer the question, I'll give an answer -- or maybe no answer at all. A close colleague at work goes to Dominican Republic All-Inclusives every year. She and her husband both long to go to Scotland. Me and my best friend (who also works with me) have traveled multiple times to go to Scotland and have offered her all kinds of guidance, since she doesn't know anything about planning that kind of trip.

She says the airfare is too expensive. I found an airfare well within her stated budget.
She says she they are afraid to drive over there. I said take a tour, or day tours from home bases. She says those itineraries won't cover the kinds of places they want to go to (she's a bit of a "ghost hunter" and wants to stay at some haunted places.
She says hotels cost too much there. I said stay at these B&Bs, or self-catering. They would fall within her stated budget.
She says her husband doesn't want to stay at a B&B (envisions grotty rooms and nosy owner/operators), and they don't really have interest in self-catering.
She wants to use a travel agent for the whole thing. I suggested the travel agent might not be the best resource of a trip that she says she wants.
We went over every issue just after Christmas, and at the end I just told her that since she seems to put up a roadblock on every solution offered that I don't think she actually wants to go.

Why won't she bite the bullet and make it happen? She's been discussing this trip for years with me.

So I think people don't travel because they either lack interest, or lack the ability to overcome the nerves for that first trip abroad. I recall our first trip -- it can be a bit daunting if you didn't travel with your family growing up.

You could turn the question on its head and and ask what is so lacking in people's lives at home that they have to travel to the other side of the world for stimulation?

We've been in small metro Florida for 20 years now because of the Spousal Unit's job and have discovered there is actually a limit to the amount of time you can spend at the beach. So if you're going to have to get on the plane to see some mountains, might as well make the trip to really cool mountains, even if it's across an ocean or so.

I had a former coworker who was terrified of flying, even though I don't think she'd ever flown. She finally took the plunge and flew to Toronto for a weekend (maybe for a Jays game) and that was enough to convince her she wasn't going to die.

For my parents - 4 kids within 7 years pretty much put a damper on travelling. Mom goes now to visit my sister in the UK pretty much every year. Dad always wanted to see Nfld, but passed away before doing that. Mom came to Italy with me and hubs in 2014 and she loved it. She's going to come with us next year when we go back and already she is talking about it and making plans.

My mother in law was the kind who would say - why go see these places when you can just watch a show on tv about them? Father in law was in the RCAF, so he'd been to Australia and places like that, but when he retired, I'm guessing the fact that m-i-l wasn't fond of travelling meant his seeing the world days were over.

I've had a wandering heart since I was a teen. Our big reason for not travelling earlier - $$ of course - not making much money and mortgage to pay. We did some driving trips to Maine and Boston, got down to Rhode Island once and even made it to Toronto the first time in 2001. We finally had our first Europe trip in 2008 when we were able to save up enough to go. I've been addicted to Europe ever since and we've been over in 10, 12, 14, 15, 17, 18, 19 and are going again this year and next year (barring health issues).

But even going to Europe we hit some predictable spots - London every trip, Venice 5 times, Paris 4 times...and I like the familiarity of revisiting these places - we're used to the public transport, we stay in the same areas (sometimes even the same accoms), revisit fav restaurants, shop in the same stores. I like the exhilaration of new places, but like the old standbys as well, because I don't have to 'think' about how do I use the subway or how far a walk to such and such a place. It makes the journey that much more relaxing.

"In one case that comes to mind, one spouse is really interested in Europe but the other has no desire to go there."

This is one I will never understand. Why would one spouse not travel just because the other one is not interested? My husband is not a big traveler and is only interested in visiting certain countries outside of the U.S. This does not stop me from going and he would never expect me to forego what is important to me. I either find a friend or take my kids. If I ever can't find someone to travel with (hasn't happened yet) I plan to either travel solo or take a tour. Of course like everything else, this does require compromise and I do have to visit places that do not interest me sometimes :)

I have the travel bug, always have and always will. I remember a friend almost 30 years ago saying that she went to the Grand Canyon in her early 30's and went to the rim. Along side of her was a busload of older tourists (I won't say elderly since I am getting up there) with walkers and shuffling to see the Canyon. She talked to many who indicated that this was their first trip. She and I both agree how sad to wait so long. Who knows the circumstances of why they waited to travel. My friends think I am nuts for the amount of travel I do. I say if I am not hurting anyone then why should they care where and when I go? Most of my family and friends that don't travel due to finances, young children or unable to commit to a time and place. I remember being in that place and am happy that I am able to follow my dreams. So I say do what you want whether you stay or go, just don't regret it later...

maybe some people just have a high tolerance for boredom and routine.

For some people from the northern US and Canada who go to Hawaii every winter for a few weeks, the same beach, the same activities, it is not boredom and routine. It is relaxation in paradise.

Repeating a highly pleasurable activity can be an elevated life strategy, not something to be scorned.

For some people, travel to new places is stressful and energy-sucking and therefore not the way they want to spend their vacation time.

Don't be so quick to judge them. They may be happier and mentally healthier than you think.

I lived in New York City for a couple of years long ago. One memory that has stayed with me is being on a westside subway with a number of older, Eastern European-looking women, who had probably lived in NYC for decades. They were speculating about what Manhattan was like above the Columbus Circle stop. I had the impression that these women lived their whole lives in, say, a 25 x 10 block area, but they seemed to be content and happy.

Let's face it. Travel is a bug that doesn't infect everybody.

Reading this posts, I can find something I can relate to in almost all of them.

My brother and his wife go to the same all-inclusive resort in Cancun every year. Yes, they enjoy the beach, but they spend most of their time off the resort, Sometimes they sign up for excursions, some of which sound wonderful - wildlife reserves or Chichen Itza, for example; other times they'll just hop on a city bus and see where it takes them. They have a wonderful time every year.

They are planning to broaden their travel horizons a bit, though, as they get closer to retirement age. They're planning an Alaskan cruise this fall, and my s-i-l, who took Girl Scout troops to Europe about 20 years ago, has been lobbying ever since for a trip to Europe. But they both work full time, and really can only get away for a week at a time.

On the other hand, my sister and her husband (until health issues got in the way) would take long trips to fascinating places - in Europe, Polynesia, Africa - then spend the whole time in their luxury hotel.

My DH and I love to travel in Europe and in the US, although family matters have hobbled us a bit the last few years. I do enjoy returning to familiar places from time to time, because with a basic understanding of a place, we can see and appreciate even more on a return journey. We're going back to Italy this year, and will revisit some old favorites, spend some time in places we've visited only briefly, and spend time in towns we've never before seen.

No joke, I have a cousin in her early 50’s, single, no kids, has not had a job since her early 20’s, has millions and has not traveled outside US in over 6 years. She has the magic combo-time and money and yet, goes practically nowhere. I love her, but I don’t understand her.

We visit the same resort in Mallorca most years because it's a timeshare and we're guaranteed a week or two at a time of our choice. We love the resort, we love the freedom and space of a two bedroomed fully equipped villa, we love the tranquility of the the place. We also love the island and enjoy exploring it during every visit whilst combining it with relaxing downtime days where we'll lounge by the pool, have a barbeque and just generally do very little.

What we benefit from in the UK is a minimum of 28 days annual leave a year. When I was working I was entitled to 35 days but often more because I banked the frequent overtime and used it for annual leave. My wife had a similar amount so that gave us seven weeks a year to use for holidays. Those two weeks in the same resort every year were a pleasure but we also had ample time to explore other destinations, we were/are tied to the school holidays so typically we will travel during Easter, a week in May/June half term, two weeks in August and the October half term or over Christmas.

I can understand the allure of familiarity, somewhere you know well, you know what to expect, you're comfortable and enjoy the location however I'm not sure I would have the same approach if I was restricted to one week's holiday a year. I still can't fathom why there is no statutory leave in the US.

You can get to Myrtle Beach from Charleston, WV in something like 9 hours, but it's longer in a tractor, believe me.

JC: 7 weeks. Wow. As you know many Americans get two weeks, or nothing if they're hourly workers in many cases.

Nancy (green triangle) - your comment about the older folks on their first journey reminds me of when we were at a birthday for my husband's aunt - it was either after our 1st or 2nd trip to Europe and one of her friends there (who was prob pushing 80) said she and her husband had always talked about travelling when he retired - and not long after he turned 65, he passed away, so she sadly said she never got a chance (I guess she didn't want to go on her own). She said - go while you're young and you can.

Travel is like any other interest, not everyone shares it, and nor do they have to. I have friends who talk endlessly about wine. It makes my eyes glaze over. A former workmate of mine actually got two work trips to Europe, one to Belgium and one to Paris. This was because we worked for a French company. He seems to have liked the trips, but it did not cause him to have any desire to travel. He still prefers to spend his holidays quietly at home. My late mother did travel to Europe once, which was to visit me when I worked in London. But otherwise she was only really happy travelling to Hong Kong where she grew up to visit family.

I think Big Mike may have hit on something most of us had not thought about: most people in the US get only 2 weeks of vacation time a year and they don't want to "waste" it so they fall back on familiar, dependable, easy to reach, destinations where they know they will have whatever type of activities they want with minimal stresses.

It has been so long since I was in that type of job (yes, I have been very lucky in my career path and my most recent job gave me 6 weeks of vacation a year plus the 10 standard government holidays off), I didn't even consider it. Having six weeks spread through the year, I had gotten in the habit of taking 2 weeks at a familiar place where I could relax, 2 weeks on a tour to somewhere I had never been, and the remaining 2 weeks to handle tasks around the house and other things requiring me to take time off from work. That way if the tour was a complete bust for whatever reason, I knew I still had the 2 weeks of relaxation and could probably fit in some vacation activities on the remaining 2 weeks as well.

This is a good question. What makes us into different types of travelers, if we even travel at all?

When I was growing up, we rarely traveled. My father had one whole week of vacation which we used to drive 4 hours up to see my mother's family. It was still in the same state. At the time, though, this felt exotic to me because my mother treated every trip out of the house with the same seriousness and intensity as if we were packing a covered wagon to cross the plains on our way to the wild, wild west. Would we make it to our destination intact? Heaven only knew.

[Spoiler - clearly we made it since I'm typing this.]

For a long time as an adult, I also had the conflicts of time and money. When I had the time to travel, I didn't have the funds. When I did have enough money, I didn't have the available time. I think for many Americans, that is a familiar story. And if you've never traveled outside your own comfort zone and aren't the bravest of people - like me - it's hard to know where to begin. For me, watching the RS shows gave me the courage to take that first step outside the US. He made it look/sound easy enough for even me to give it a go.

In all honesty, I still have a moment of gulping and wondering what will happen on each trip...but then I grab my bag and go. I'm no longer afraid of leaving my known world, so to speak, but sometimes you can't turn off feelings which you've had since childhood. Now I recognize them as simply relics of the past and keep going. What makes me want to see what's out there? I don't know, but it's a desire which brings me great joy while taking its toll on my bank account. ;-)

When I was finishing flight school in the Air Force, we hundred some Lts. submitted our Form 90 "Dream Sheets" requesting the aircraft and base assignment we wanted. I was amazed how at least 9 of 10 fellow "adventurers" requested the base closest to home. At the time I asked them, "Why join the Air Force if all you want to see is your home town?"

Much later I owned a small restaurant that wasn't part of a chain. Consumer tastes in the U.S. are interesting for restaurants. American consumers will go to McDonalds, rather than try a locally owned restaurant, not because they think it's better but because they perceive less risk in the decision. They know what they're going to get, even if it isn't good. I think there's a little of the same with traveling to unknown destinations. If I go to Myrtle Beach, I know what to expect. If I fly to Dubrovnik, I might not like the flight, food, lodging and/or crowds. The potential downside outweighs the potential positive for a lot of people.

BTW, I asked for a fighter to Europe and was given a bomber to Guam. It turned out, even though I was near the top of the class (and supposedly had preference) another Lt's dad was friends with the squadron commander so he got my fighter and I got his bomber. The upside was I enjoyed some travel around Asia and I learned that the Air Force wasn't going to be my last career.

Both my wife and I are euro-oriented. I lived in Germany as a child of 5-10. When I go to German areas, I feel quite nostalgic, and somewhat at home. My wife loves all things French, and spent a year abroad learning French and Spanich in SW France. We travel to see those places again. We also are interested in history, and in seeing the historical places directly. My family history is in the Balkans, so we go there a lot. My wife has Scandinavian roots, but little knowledge of specific places. We may go there eventually.

I am also, as one person noted above, traveling more inside the USA. There's a lot to see here.

aquamarinesteph-my mother was the same way. I will never forget her packing for a trip to DisneyWorld as if there were no grocery stores in Orlando! Brad, I'd much rather take a chance on the unknown in Dubrovnik, than experience what I think I know about Myrtle Beach!

Sorry Mike, but Myrtle Beach is Pittsburgh South.

This cracked me up! I was born in a suburb of Pittsburgh and lived there until I was 13. EVERY summer we took a road trip to Myrtle Beach - 3 days to drive down, one week there, 3 days to drive home - and that was pretty much the extent of the time my dad took off from work each year. We stayed at the same hotel and ate at the same restaurants every year. As soon as we moved to another state those trips stopped:)

I think I'm adopted. Growing up, my Dad took the same 3 weeks off every July, and we went to the same campground in Sicamous, BC and set up camp at the same campsite. When we pulled out 3 weeks later, he'd stop at the campground office and make the same reservation for next year. My brother and his wife go to Hawaii every year at Christmas, other than that, nothing. Their excuse for not traveling more-too busy...they're retired. They love the photos my wife and I post on Facebook but are never curious beyond that to broaden their horizons. Different strokes I guess.

For many people me included it's about familiarity. If early in your life you were used to traveling then that is familiar to you, if you didn't travel in that formative period then it's not familiar. Some people are thrill seekers, others worry a lot. The viewpoint of your partner may be an influence one way or another. Once you get started down a road some people just continue on it (traveling or not traveling). Then your own opinions may be reinforced by like minded friends (birds of a feather flock together). These are generalities. Some people dream of traveling for many years before they get the chance. Others dream of staying put once they can. Some people try traveling once or twice and decide it's not for them. Others try not traveling for a time and find that they can't stand it. People are diverse.

I also see these different perspectives here in France. It is of course much cheaper and easier to travel abroad from here, and holiday time is less of an issue than in the US. But still, many people like their routine.
For instance: I am just back from Switzerland for a short winter break, and I got quite a few comments along the likes of "but why Switzerland? We have the Alps in France too!". Followed by looks of disbelief when I explained that, well, if I am going to travel for an entire day to get somewhere, it might as well be somewhere that feels different from home!

"Travel is a bug...." How true. I am very glad (and lucky too) that I was infected with this travel bug at 21 in 1971 when making my first trip to Europe solo and have stayed infected to this day, regardless if it has been 25 trips. The 26th trip is being planned for this summer, landing in Paris, Frankfurt or London.

Tale of Two Sons. Once upon a time, both born to a French father and American mother, dragged between the two countries, cultures, languages, grandparents, holidays. One was traveling alone in NY and Paris from 14 on. The other finds 10 days in an Airbnb in Paris too long; after a week he's ready to be back in his hip Brooklyn. Same womb, same genes. And the parents are travel nuts.

Just remembered how my dad hated to travel. ‘I didn’t lose anything there’ was his favorite excuse.

I think a lot of his hatred of travel came from boring business travel in the 1970s and 80s. It may have been the golden age of travel, but there wasn’t much to do on a long flight besides drink, smoke and read for 8-10 hours. And, he was the engineer often picked to travel along with the salespeople when his company was negotiating deals. So, he’d fly overseas just to watch the salespeople doing their schmoozing while he was there to answer any technical questions. And, of course, factories aren’t in city centres so the evening entertainment either consisted of more alcohol or watching Gilligan’s Island dubbed into German on the hotel tv. Plus, his idea of food adventure was getting tater tots rather than fries so he generally hated the food overseas.

I wish I had traveled more when I was younger and I encourage people to do so. And, although I might get flamed for this, but start setting boundaries with your friends and family. I know it’s hard, but turning down going to your cousin’s wedding in Poughkeepsie saves you vacation time and money. It sucks setting boundaries but it’s easier to do it when you’re younger.

And, it’s something you should discuss early on with a significant other. I had a coworker who was surprised by his wife when she bought some tickets for an all inclusive trip without even telling him because she was sick of the Chicago winter. Thus he had to sacrifice 5 days of vacation and negotiate peace with me since that week happened to be my birthday week and I had to work it with him being out of town. I hope they’re still married, but I don’t think he relished the idea of having thousands disappear from their bank account just because his wife got cold in Chicago in January and she wanted to clap her hands and have someone bring her a cocktail with a umbrella in it!

I actually think Emma is on to something-at least in my case. I went to Europe for the first time in college and twice with my husband before we had kids. Then no more European travel for years.

Our kids are grown now. Life is pretty calm. I have been in the same job for 20 years. I obviously loved traveling from an early age. But now planning a trip with all the advantages of the internet gives me a distraction from the hum drum of daily life. It amuses me. I can endlessly read about different options and I enjoy learning about history more when I am going to experience it. We watch documentaries and tube videos on wherever we are going to visit. I collect and read travel books. It is a project.

And I love the actual travel because it pushes me out of my comfort zone.

I have colleagues who took jobs in new locales to get themselves out of the rut of doing the same thing. It is easier to keep the same bank, doctor, and gym and travel.

So this thread has me wondering, "What's the difference between 'rut' and 'routine'?" Attitude, I guess. And sometimes a cozy safe routine becomes a rut, and vice versa.

Or perspective. I may see my neighbor's routine as a rut, whereas she sees it as a happy, comfortable life. Hmmm.

Rut vs Routine.

I’d say a routine is something that is either neutral or even good. I put my medicines and vitamins on the left side of the counter before bed every and move them to the right once I’ve taken them that day. Or, I put my phone down in the morning and do a physical crossword while having my coffee.

A rut I’d say is a negative thing, such as a job that’s just there, showing up every day but no challenge and getting the annual 3% raise with no chance of advancement. Of course, not everyone wants to change jobs, so you have to figure out other ways out of the rut.

I’d say for travel a routine example may be always be picking the same hotel. For me, a hotel is a hotel unless it’s part of a romantic getaway. I don’t need charm, quaintness, or a cat in the lobby. But a travel rut would always be doing the same thing on every trip. And this is fine for some attractions. No one can see all of the Prado or the Louvre in a 3 hour visit, so it’s fine to return to see more of the collection. But. I’d hate to use the exact same itinerary from trip to trip. Sometimes I just have to let weather drive it. My last U.K. trip was very museum heavy because I finally got caught with nothing but rain for most of the trip, whereas the previous time, still in early May featured gorgeous and near record temperatures so my museum time was very limited.

Dale, sure but only because you've decided one is a routine (positive), and the other a rut (negative). You could just as easily say drinking coffee and doing a crossword every morning means you're in a rut and need to get out more. Or you could say going to work, not expecting a promotion, but getting on with work and having a regular pay rise means you're in a cosy routine we'd envy.

Personally, I think the rut vs routine argument is as pointless as the travel vs don't travel discussion. People are different, that's all there's to it.

I like going on holiday to new or newish places. But travelling a bit doesn't make a better person, despite what some on here seem to think.

I have problems with people who have more than enough money to travel, but use that as excuse why they don’t travel. I can accept other reasons, including not having the money to do it, but when I know the money is there at least be honest on why you don’t travel and that includes traveling in the United States.

I live about 300+ miles from Yosemite, which is my favorite place anywhere, but can’t believe why people who live so close haven’t visited it. Yes, it does take some effort to get reservations, but effort is so worth it. So many of my friends who don’t travel, finally make a decision to go and think they can book a tour or River Cruise for Europe a month before the plan to leave. I have tried to convince them to plan on going much earlier, but no, they wait until the last minute and them are disappointed that they couldn’t get a reservation anywhere. Same thing happens the next year. It just so frustrating to see them get so excited only to be so disappointed when they can’t get a reservation.

Excuses/reasons I have heard from various friends and family members:

Simply lacking the energy and curiosity to go a-wandering
Don't like flying or afraid to go on such a long flight
Mobility issues
"Everyone smokes in Europe"
It's dangerous--this one ramps into high gear whenever there is an incident of some kind
It's scary to go so far from home and be surrounded by foreign people
They prefer a lazy beach-type vacation in HI or Mexico
It's expensive (hard to compare as I travel solo)

My favorite: "How do you know what to do every day?"These folks are unable to plan their way out of a paper bag.

We’ve had a fair amount of US visitors since our arrival in Italy in 2018. We knew that odds were high that certain friends or family would definitlety plan a trip around seeing us. But we were thrilled that our presence here prompted a few of our friends to fly to Europe for the very first time. While it did take some pre-trip phone calls, and a little handholding and lot of planning, it was great fun to see them experience Italy for the very first time!

I think discomfort with the prospect of being surrounded by people speaking a foreign language is a major negative factor for some people. For me it's a plus, because I love being in surroundings that feel different, and the language is a big part of that.

I didn't grow up traveling, and none of my relatives talked about foreign travel. But I read a lot as a child, including books set in foreign countries. By 10-12 I had graduated to reading guidebooks to Europe. I fell in love with foreign travel at least 8 years before I had the opportunity to experience it.

One of my brothers is more interested in scuba diving trips that the typical foreign vacation; I think he's only been out of the country once on a non-scuba trip. The other one had to do a fair amount of foreign business travel before retirement, but he would never leave the country voluntarily if his wife weren't so gung-ho.

I have a feeling that more (American) men than women are travel-averse, but I've never seen statistics to back that up. Given how crowded much of Europe is, I guess I should be happy not everyone wants to go.

When it comes to solo traveling in Europe, it's basically about comfort, security, safety, flexibility, discipline, etc. Solo traveling grows on you. Maybe guys travel more solo than women, although I have seen numerous women of all ages, both US and European doing solo travel. I've always done it and still do

I travel because it keeps me sane. I work hard and knowing I have a trip to look forward to for RR and adventure is a carrot at the end of the stick.

First trip, first flight, was as a high school Senior when my High School‘s football team was invited to play in Hawaii. I was Rally Commisioner so Mom and Dad coughed up the $250 for the flight. Had to organize what the cheerleaders and flag girls would be doing during the game....great sacrifice on my part....😉

2 years later my then college beau invited me to accompany him on a 9 city European business trip. He was standing in for his father. To this day the excitement I felt seeing a windmill while looking out the plane window as we were landing in Amsterdam still elicits a smile.

Each year I try to drive up to Yosemite. Refreshes me to walk or hike among the granite lined valley. From my perspective it’s one of nature’s cathedrals.

Being there or in the Hampstead Heath or getting lost in Venice or camping out at Chaco Canyon, or walking along the Seine, or in the Burren or along Havana’s Malecon is how I worship and connect with the world around me.

Travel is a privilege that I whole heartedly respect.

"I travel because it keeps me sane". This is a good comment but you can also substitute plenty of other things for travel. I will again bring up the example of my late mother. When she and my father visited me in Europe, they also joined a rather rushed Trafalgar tour of Europe. They enjoyed parts of it, but found it all rather rushed and tiring. My father could not say enough bad things about Trafalgar, but that is another story. After that trip my mother always said she preferred working in the garden to travelling. So for her it was gardening that kept her sane.

It's like anything, you can't do or have it all, all at once or something suffers. My family had a group of summer houses, so summers were already claimed, and I wouldn't have missed it for the world. Sadly, I don't believe those environments exist any more or are an extreme rarity. As summers were claimed, my parents concentrated on the necessary domestic family vacations, for example, Washington, DC in April, that type of thing. While they didn't travel like I do, they traveled as they wanted. In the end, the year my mother became incapacitated, she was pondering a second trip to the UK in one year, so there are different seasons for everyone.

For me, I remember in detail when my sixth grade teacher said to our class "All of you will travel to Europe in your life time". I remember the feeling of excitement that I had, and for years, I kept that in the forefront of my mind until I was able to go for the first time during college. For me there are many different reasons to travel, and many trips address a segment of those reasons. For me, the feeling of going with no reservations and managing just fine, gives me a thrill and sense of accomplishment that nothing else does, being away from one's safety net is freeing. That being said, as others have some say in my travels these days, whether they are with me or I'm traveling independently and solo, they want me to have a safety net so I compromise. I enjoy my travel none the less and will travel now, while I can, because life can pitch a curveball to shake things up.

As for some of the other kids in my sixth grade class, I'm sure most of them do not travel like I do. And while it would likely open their minds a bit, I'm just as glad not everyone travels where I do.

I must say that the first time I traveled to Europe I was terrified, as well as exhilarated. I was a college sophomore, heading to the Soviet Union for summer classes at Leningrad State University. I had never traveled on my own at all, other than the 50 mile drive from my hometown to college.

I joined a group in Helsinki, and went with them to Leningrad, then Moscow and Kiev after the summer school session. Then we were on our own until the group reassembled in Amsterdam about a week or 10 days later. I was absolutely broke. I think I had $10 to last me until I got home. Luckily, one of the other students tore pages out of her "Europe on $5 a Day" (Remember that one?) and I used it to find hostels. By eating breakfast at the hostel, and one other meal per day, I made it. I visited Vienna and Munich on my way to rejoin the group in Amsterdam. I remember sharing a train compartment with two other students, neither of whom I had met before. It was one of those where the seats folded down to make a sleeping surface in the compartment. The guy was the tallest - he could fit diagonally; the other girl and I curled up in the corners.

Went home to marry my sweetie - that was a long time ago. Now we travel to Europe once a year, and laugh about the days when we cried with joy when we found a $10 bill in a coat pocket.

As to the different priorities - my older sister thinks nothing of dropping probably $400-500 driving 3 hrs away and spending a weekend to see a concert in New Brunswick 3-4 times a year - or going to Maine for a long weekend and spending prob another $1000. Yet, she says she can't save money to go England. If she just wouldn't do the shopping/concert trips for 52 weeks, she could def head to England, but that's not her priority, I guess. She's happy with what she does.

So my cousin married an Eskimo near the Bering Sea, raised her kids in a village, husband hunted and fished. Spent summers in fish camp. Had the dogs, snowmobile, etc. Has never traveled except down to the lower 48 a few times in forty years, but she started the village library, extracted teeth for others via radio instructions in her early years up north, lobbied for her village and family. I'm thankful she doesn't look down on me and my cushy jet rides back and forth to France.
I think this thread reeks of judgement.

I think this thread reeks of judgement.

Yikes, I didn't get that impression at all. I interpreted it as friendly curiosity about human nature. I posted a comment earlier in this thread, that my Dad chose the same 3 weeks every year at the same campsite in the same campground for our family vacation. On the other hand I don't sit still and am always exploring new places. Am I judging my Dad when I wonder why we do things in a different way? No, but thinking back, I do wish I would have asked about his motivation for doing it that way.

Let me dial that back Allan. Some posts tend to be judgemental, but, (and now my mind wandering is going toward Emma) whenever this subject comes up, it’s often the one who travels who is put on the defensive by the non-traveler who questions how they can partake in such extravagant ( in the questioner’s eyes) enterprises. “You’re going to be broke in your old age and I’m not going to help you,” or, “that’s so unnecessary to do,” or, “why would you want to go there?” Anyway, the traveler often finds him/herself defending or justifying their lifestyle.

So maybe letting off a little steam after being put under that pressure is Ok, but this is a fine line to walk.

To me it comes down to, how could I wonder about my cousin who’s spent 40+ years in the rough frozen north, not cushy Anchorage or Fairbanks, but went to Denali for the first time just a couple of years ago? Who am I to wonder why when her life has been so full in other ways.

Admittedly, I could not have gone to Europe as a college sophomore in 1969, even if I had had the finances. Bottom line was I was not ready for such a trip emotionally, psychologically, certainly linguistically, and most likely, I would have ended up going solo which was not my preference.

When I went two years later as a college senior in the summer of 1971, going solo was no problem, and emotionally, psychologically, and language wise I was much more prepared and fit.

Fred, I went as a sophomore because the opportunity presented itself. My Russian teacher suggested that another classmate and I go on this educational tour, he helped us apply for scholarships through the sponsoring university, and my parents graciously offered to help pay the balance. And yes, I was much too immature, and my language skills were marginal. But it opened the world to me in a way that I came to appreciate much later.

It was also a chance to meet and interact with other American students from all over the country. Now that was intimidating. One of my roommates in Leningrad went to Yale, another was the oldest of 7 children and was the chief caretaker of the younger kids. And a third was a semi-professional ballet dancer. Now those folks were poised and mature!

It was a great experience. Had I been older, I would have gotten more out of it, but I was about to be married (two weeks after I got home) and this was definitely a "carpe diem" moment.

Wray I have to laugh because no teacher in my small Georgia town would ever have said that. When I was in 6th grade there were no international commercial flights out of Atlanta! In high school, I set myself a life goal of making a (singular) trip to Europe-our lives can be very different from what we expect!

Maybe those people have other priorities/commitments in life. For example, they may donate A LOT of time, tutoring underprivileged students, working at the local abused women's shelter, transporting dogs to no-kill shelters, delivering Meals on Wheels to seniors who cannot get out but who light up when they see them at the door, or maybe they are training puppies to progress to the training for special assistance dogs.................there are all sorts of ways people may choose to spend their time or make commitments. Or, maybe they just are not interested in traveling. Or maybe in a crazy world, they just love the comfort/peace of their own home....the familiar. I would have no interest in going to the Super Bowl, likely not even if someone gave me tickets (sports fans would think "what? is that lady nuts?")

We all have different interests and sometimes at different times/points in our lives.

Let's not judge anyone. Just relish in the tapestry of life that is created by our friends/associates that make it one big colorful world of different talents, interests, etc.

And, think HOW CROWDED places would be if EVERYONE wanted to go there. Note how many times people post/complain about crowds.

I have personally traveled A LOT....all seven continents (repeats to Europe), most of the US states, VI and BVI. Besides Antarctica, our favorite trip of all time was 5 nights we spent on our second visit to the (now destroyed by a hurricane) Caneel Bay Resort on St. John. Woke up, walked the beach, snorkeled, went to brunch, sat on beach under palm trees, snorkeled, sat on beach, watched boats from covered balcony on the beach, went dinner......repeat, repeat, repeat.........relaxing and totally wonderful....never left the resort. We are normally go/go/go on touring vacations, but I learned the art of relaxing on that trip, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that art :)

Two years ago, after returning from a second trip to Asia, we decided to adopt a puppy and now he is a big focus of our lives. His 2nd birthday was earlier this week, and he knows which ball is his "birthday ball" when I tell him to go get it :) :) Lucky for anyone reading this, I am not able to post photos......I am a doggy mom :)

We took a short National Geographic trip to the Sea of Cortez earlier this winter, but I just cannot (yet) get excited about another trip. Oh, the catalogs come....6 and 7 a day (seriously), and we will travel again.....more places we still want to see....but I am just not excited to plan anything right now. Taking a break. Nothing wrong with that....other priorities right now. We may travel in another year, we might wait 2 or more, but we will not force it until we are excited to do it. If Caneel were rebuilt to its original form (and likely it will not anytime soon), we would be there in a heartbeat.

So, Mike to answer your question. They have other priorities or they simply just are not interested right now. Accept that and them.

@ Jane...my compliments on your choosing Russian in college, certainly much tougher and linguistically challenging (ie, 6 cases as opposed to 4 in German), than German which was what I was tackling as a college sophomore.

If I had known what was up against, I might have chosen differently. But Russian was my first foreign language (other than high school Latin) so I didn't know it was hard. Did you know Polish has effectively 5 genders? Masculine is divided into three separately declined categories, plus feminine and neuter. Yowzah!

Edit to add: And seven cases. It's beautiful. Eventually. :-)

At the risk of oversimplifying, there are people who have ordered nothing but light beer their entire lives, though they may be surrounded by micro-breweries and vineyards. People like to stay inside their comfort zones. It's strange sometimes to realize that my wife and I feel we never travel enough in world where most people never get far from their homes.

I've driven cross the US 22 times. Did that in my teens till i was in my forties. Tried like hell to convince the rest of my family that this was something they should experience, to little avail. Literally, just had to force people out of their comfort zone: "Get in the freaken car, it will be Okay." The first 500 miles seems to be the most difficult: Out side anything familiar to them. But I knew where stuff was after doing it the first 6 times. They got the feeling it wasn't so bad to be un-tied to the familiar. This gave me all the travel skills I needed to explore the rest of the world. I would help people in need on the road. My passenger sometimes would say, "just drive by," and I'd reply, you don't understand this," and stop any way. Met lots of very interesting people that way, and maybe there is some pay it forward in my philosophy. One time it was a member of a very famous band that had to make a flight, we gave them gas from our reserve, they got our address and sent and entire set of all their albums: A band I liked. If you get in trouble, its not so bad. Don't be afraid of that stranger: Don't be afraid to ask, about something you don't know. Local People are generally good, if they can see you, as generally good. Its that way, of what I've seen in Europe. So many locals have gone well over, what we think is socially required, to help us. They did, and I thank them. They reinforce this sense that people are basically good. So don't be afraid to get out of that comfort zone.

I think curiosity plays a big part in whether people travel or not. Yes, there's limited vacation time and travel is expensive. I live in Seattle and other than Canada nothing is really close...you either fly or drive for several hours/day.

Also, there are people who are uncomfortable in different situations. We can travel all over the US and Canada (a vast area) and electrical outlets, faucets, money and how toilets are flushed are all the same. The first time I visited Europe everything was different from country to country and while I found that fascinating, I think, many people would find it very uncomfortable.

We hear about how Americans are sadly lacking in the ability to speak any foreign language and I think many people assume the language barrier is greater than it is.

I live in a pretty affluent neighborhood. My neighbors vacation but always within the continental US. They would like to travel abroad but are convinced it’s simply too expensive.

Reason #2–Language. Some neighbors are afraid that they won’t be able to get around because they don’t speak the language.

There's more than a little condescension and virtue-signaling in a few of these answers, but I won't get into that...

I used to travel quite a lot. For about a decade, I visited Europe at least annually, then when I was lucky enough to live there for several years, I took every chance I got to explore (within the constraints of a work schedule).

But I haven't been back since 2015, and it will probably be several years before I go again. What changed? In short, now that I have a kid, I have different priorities. My wife and I both live far away from our respective families, and we use our vacation time to either visit them or pick a cost-effective and logistically feasible destination where we can all get together (our old family stand-by of Ocean City, NJ fits this bill quite well). Although I still have the itch to explore Europe, at this stage I place a higher priority on my son creating connections and good memories with his family.

Sure, I would love to plan a family get-together in Europe. But considering that only two members of my family visited me when for several years in Europe I had free lodging to offer that could accommodate a fairly large number of people, a large family reunion in Europe is probably never going to happen.

@ Jane ...Yes, With 7 Polish has one case for than Russian, both much more daunting and linguistically challenging than German with its 4 cases. The Mrs decided to take up Polish in 2001, (with no knowledge of Russian), got to a basically conversational level and stopped.

Maybe people don't travel because they didn't have role models to teach them and if they are risk averse, unlikely to try on their own.

I cannot answer why people do not travel but I will tell you why I travel. I am a product of my experiences...my home, my education, my religion. I grew up in a world of art, music, and history. I enjoy traveling in Europe because of my understanding of the arts and religion of that part of the world. I believe that is why I am student of Rick Steves. I thrill at singing in an old cathedral in Dunkeld, Scotland, or in San Marco, Venice, or in the Vatican on a Sunday morning and playing my flute in Edinburgh, Siena, and Rome. I stand in awe in the museums...Paris’ Orangerie dreaming in front of Monet’s lily pond, or the ancient mosaics from Pompeii in Naples, or the well-preserves Mary Rose in Portsmouth. I am carried away to the past walking on the streets of Canterbury, stomping around the prehistoric stones of Merryvale in Dartmoor, and meandering on the desolate Burren in west Ireland. This is why I travel. I am not a person of means but I find a way to experience that which I know and love before I am no longer able to. Thanks for reading this and “Keep on Travelin’” (if you are so inclined).