One less roadblock on the way to a Europe trip

Baby steps....but steps nevertheless.

You only live once, the master bedroom closet and garage will still be there when you return. I always say "travel when you have your health, your income and or assets (whichever is applicable) and the time off." I say go for it now! Happy travels!

Yay! Keep on working on it. We had hoped to go to Europe in 2010 when my husband retired from active duty military service. The Icelandic volcano erupted. It's taken 6 years for us to pull the trigger and take a trip to Europe. Money, time, taking the leap--none of this is easy for us, either. In the last year we've decided that this is something we want to do; we should do it now.

Keep going! You've got to have the desire first. :)

Ray, I totally agree with you. However, we really don't want to start travelling much until our son is done with high school in two years, so that gives us some time to get the house in order. Its not a big deal for me, but is for my wife and she would enjoy things more if she wasn't as concerned about the house. In general though, there is that "someday" syndrome that leads us to put off things until the perfect time, which of course never arises. I'm definitely aware of that danger.

Pkskow, hope you guys are able to travel soon.

Hey Rob,

You know with this plan and mindset you're never going to Europe. There will always, always, be one more thing that needs to be done. The garage, etc. can be cleaned, organized, whatever, any time. Travel while you can and are able. Trust me, things can change very quickly and you can then watch your dreams getting away from you. Happened to us, it can happen to anyone at anytime. Seize the moment.

Hi Rob,
I also think you should seize the moment and go ASAP, but do what you have to do. Look at it this way; by waiting til your chores are done, you will have time to save more money and have a longer and grander trip. Maybe start some early planning now, and plan more as your chores near completion. No TV except travel shows. 😉 Good luck and happy travels!

I appreciate that you have circumstances that you feel are keeping you from travelling right now, but I have to agree with Ray. Life is not predictable--it can throw any of us a curve ball at any time, and some of those curve balls can make travel impossible. A travel agent I have known for years has told me that one of the saddest parts of her job is when someone has put off their planned dream travel until it's too late, be it health, wealth, or some other unforeseen circumstance that has waylaid their plans. I realize this is Debbie-Downer stuff, but the harsh reality is that none of us is guaranteed a tomorrow. Just my two cents.

I have left the " garage from hell" and the like in order to travel. Felt uneasy about that beforehand, but, once the trip was underway, any thoughts about the state of my house vanished completely! You can probably tell that I'm with the 'don't put it off' camp.

rob,

I agree with Ray - the paper pile will still be there when you get back. I've also got a mountain of sorting to do throughout the house, so I know how that works. One can always find that "one more project" to do before taking a holiday, but at some point it's time to take the plunge.

I suffered a serious leg injury several years ago, and that made it abundantly clear that if there were things I wanted to do in life, I'd better get cracking as one event can change the picture in the blink of an eye. After the surgeon gave me his blessing, I took off to Europe for two months!

Is your son capable of looking after himself for a few weeks? If not, is there a relative he could stay with while the three of you are on holidays? Even a short two week holiday would be a good place to start.

Let me start by saying any forward progress is good. But...

I have to agree with the majority - clutter and messes will still be there - don't put things off. All too often stuff happens - we were planning a major trip - one morning my husband woke up and had a sudden problem - turned out to be cancer, 18 months, chemo, 2 major surgeries and a boatload of complications later he is finally doing well and we are back to planning. I am grateful everyday as there were times it could have ended very different.

Three weeks ago a friend of mine threw a blood clot - died two days later when fam disconnected life support - she was only 60.

If you can do it sooner - do it and do not let petty issues get in the way.

I think the key "house" that really needs to get in order before lengthy travel is the "financial house" (not the physical one). That (should in theory) truly give a peace of mind when traveling. The other stuff may be proxies for something else...people will put up all sorts of interesting roadblocks to stand in for the "real" one which may be as simple as fear of the unknown or anxiety toward travel. I don't know for sure of course, just a speculation about human behavior I've seen.

Rob in Cal: Simple question: when you and your bride sit around in the evening with an adult beverage reminiscing about life, what will bring more great memories: having cleaned out the garage making space for the second car or having walked hand-in-hand in the evening in Florence or sharing a glass of wine on a boat on the Seine at sunset with the Eiffel Tower on the horizon?

~Darrel

Postpone nothing!

I, also, am a carpe diem type of traveler. No one is promised tomorrow. When my 94 year old Mom died a few years ago after a very full life, her only regrets were not getting to the Great Wall of China and not going on an African safari to see the wildlife. While I have no interest in either of those destinations I am traveling as much as I can while I am able.

Your wife might be interested in the FlyLady website. Her decluttering and cleaning methods help people not burn out on big tasks.

Oh my goodness. Of all the reasons not to travel, having to clean out a closet or the garage is the lamest. I'm teasing. Sort of. Are you sure your wife really wants to travel? If she doesn't, that's fine. If she does and you do, and there's nothing else stopping you, get moving! If you need to wait until your kids have graduated, you can at least start planning. Go while you can! The mess can be cleaned up anytime. Or never.

Bribe her to come to more Panera meetings! The enthusiasm may be catching.
We are returning in about four days after a great 8 weeks -- and the closets will STILL be waiting. But maybe you could turn the garage cleaning into a garage SALE to generate cash for Europe ??

I don't think any of my professional items older than 3 or 4 years would be worthwhile to maintain. I recycle them rather than fill up space that could be used for more useful things. How likely is it that something 16 years old would ever be referenced again? Large collections of paper goods are fire hazards even if they are not in a hoarder's home. Also, people on their deathbeds seldom wish that they had filed more years worth of paper goods but they will likely wish that they had traveled and learned more about the world. In my personal experience, such postponements were simply due to people not really wishing to travel. Some people are more content with status quo and routine. People really need to set priorities and filed papers never make my top 10. I would rather pare down and I have had some success selling items from my music collection. One Supremes album alone sold for $400. I'd never play vinyl again anyway so why not use the money for some fun in the Marais?

I was sort of in the same mindset. There were so many things I needed to do to my home. But one day I realized I was fast approaching 60 and my health and physical agility might start to decline. "Stuff" at home will always be there, you health might not.

Thanks for the replies everybody. I do feel that my wife is less interested in travel than I am, but whenever we do travel she enjoys it. I think once we go to Europe and have an enjoyable time she'd want to be a regular visitor. We'd both want to go to Europe for a fairly long trip instead of a short one, so we do want to wait until our son is old enough to man the home front on his own, or develops a travel interest as well. This year my wife and I are going to do a one week Alaska cruise without the kids (a week is manageable, I think) and also a Yosemite long weekend for all us.
Life is very unpredictable, and as I approach the big 50 in age, am focusing on trying to live a fuller, more meaningful life. Financially things seem to be coming together to give us a lot of potential travel opportunities, so I do want to incorporate that into our lives in the years ahead if at all possible. My wife hasn't changed her wish list of things to get done since I started talking about future travel in 2014, so I don't think its an excuse, more a desire for a better peace of mind, and yes, we are throwing away a lot of paper. I've got to start getting rid of my surplus of books that I'll never likely read again. Hard for a book lover, but it can be done.

I guess I can get what you are trying to do, sort of, kind of, maybe.....but really, I fail to understand how cleaning out the clutter in your home (we all have it) will give your wife peace of mind to travel and enjoy a trip to Europe. One reason I love to travel is to "leave it all behind". As others have said, it sounds like some reluctance on her part and excuse making. And, as others have said, it will all be there when you get back and probably will always be there, it's life!

If she is not an enthusiastic traveler, I suggest you look at Rick's 21 day Best of Europe tour. Another Rick Steves tour guide told me he went on this tour as an assistant one time and loved it because there are blockbuster sights every day. He was so right!

It is a busy tour and can be tiring BUT everything is taken care of for you. You do need to do some research on what to do in your free time but even then the guides always have some great suggestions.

You would want to fly in a couple of days ahead of time to Amsterdam or Haarlem and perhaps stay a couple of days after the tour ends in Paris. I took this tour in the Fall of 2014 and I actually think about it every single day AND I've done a bunch of tours since then!

Pam, we've thought about tours a bit, but I think our pace might be to do a local city tour and then travel around on our own more, so we wouldn't be tied down to a definite schedule. One advantage I have is that I speak German pretty well, and feel pretty confident about how a trip to German speaking Europe would go, and I think my wife would enjoy it alot. Its great that you think about your tour every day two years later, must have been a special time for you.

rob,

Perhaps one of the My Way tours would be a good fit, such as the My Way Alpine Tour in 12 days as that visits mostly German-speaking countries. You'd have to plan your own sightseeing in each location, but transportation and hotels are taken care of by the tour. It might be a nice way to "get your feet wet".

Rob, I understand waiting until your son can take care of himself. We did the same thing. But the other stuff...don't put things off for those reasons. I'll tell you my story if you're going to be at the meeting next month.

Rob our first trip my husband was convinced we would end up lost, broke and with everything stolen! The language barrier made him nervous and being somewhere so foreign was unsettling. After the first week of our three week trip he wondered why he'd been so hesitant!

I fully understand the book thing. I am a huge fan of coffee table books and had quite a collection along with a large collection of hard bound and paperbacks. Our local library was delighted to take them all - what they didn't keep they sold in their annual book sale. I am now all digital - love the Kindle! Four years ago we went full time in a 40' motor home - "un-stuffing" was one of the hardest but most freeing thing I have done.

I can understand both points of view here. My husband and I wanted to do a trip to England for many years, but some more pressing financial need always came up. The time we waited made the actual trip even more precious when we were finally able to take it. We had a great time!

He passed away a few years later with no warning and at an age far younger than anyone would expect. I really treasure those memories from our trip and was so glad we had finally just gone.

Sometimes waiting for a trip can work out. The challenge is, as others have mentioned, that life can change beyond imagination in a heartbeat.

"He has a 16 yr old at home who doesn't like traveling-yet. Leaving a 16 yr old alone for 2 weeks is not a great idea in today's world."

I think that depends on the 16-year-old and other circumstances. At that age, the 16-year-old may never want to travel with M&D? If they have a good level of maturity (which some do at that age) and there are other family members nearby to help them (or provide a place to stay), then it shouldn't be a problem for Mom & Dad to take a short holiday. I have three Sons so have some experience with that sort of thing.

Of course, none of us here have a complete picture of Rob's situation.

Yeah, I don't know if my son will ever get the Euro travel bug. I do want to go to Springfield Mass and Canton Ohio to see the basketball and football hall of fames with him. A short trip to Europe could work sooner rather than later (we do have family in the greater area to help out if needed), but I don't know if either my wife or I would really want to do that. I'm thinking along the 4 to 6 weeks range right now, but of course that may change.

I would not let the filing stop you or slow you down. We have clutter at our house too, but we still go to the movies, out to dinner, art museums, etc. and we still travel. Like Rick says it's all a matter of priorities, and if I were in your shoes I would not take very much satisfaction in having done the filing but missing out on travel adventures. Having said that, I can empathize because my wife is not as enthusiastic as I am about travel. Over time I have to admit my own zeal for it has declined, guess it's diminishing marginal utility of the next strip when we have taken around fifteen to Europe so far. All the more reason why you should do it when your interest is running high.

rob,

I agree, traveling with your Son sooner rather than later will probably be the best idea. Once teenagers get to a certain age, travel with M&D just isn't going to happen. Some have the attitude that M&D are just too "dorky" and they don't want to be seen in public with them (unless the teenager can wear dark glasses and be incognito, so that none of their "cool" friends can see them with the dorky old geezers).

This is not true with all teenagers though, so you're the best one to judge that.

Rob,

I have nothing to add in terms of travel advice ( it's already all been said), but I will say, add Cooperstown to your list! It's only3 hours for Springfield MA and is the granddaddy of all the Halls of Fame! Even if you guys aren't big baseball fans, there are some pretty cool artifacts!

Enjoy,
Gretchen

@ rob...I agree with the others that time is precious. Remember, you make the decision (to go) or time will make it for you....an unpleasant alternative where choice is no option any longer.

Life is too short to dawdle.

And especially too short to worry about a clean garage unless you guys are fodder for the TV show "Hoarders."

Begin the process. Buy some guidebooks.

Start small. Head downtown and enjoy a meal at Cafeteria15L then walk through the Rose Garden and then tour the Capital.

From there drive along the Delta to the burg of Locke. Its historical and often overlooked as a nice day out.

Just saying leave the cleaning and explore.