Meeting the locals

Grocery stores, festivals, beaches, night clubs, stores, restaurants, churches, etc.; pretty much the same type places one would seek out locals in the states. While we may be on vacation to another location, the locals are living their daily lives, so just sit back and watch.

It's very easy to talk to people sitting across from you on a train, especially on journeys that last over 1 hour. One nice, rather elderly man talked to me (in Italian, since that's the only language he knew and I could understand more or less) during almost the whole train ride in Sicily from Siracusa to Ragusa. It was a regional train (slow, made all the local stops) so the locals-to-tourist ratio is very much in favor of locals. In Italy in general, old(er) men always seem to latch on and want to talk, including personal questions like why am I not married or traveling alone, etc. I was also on a bus in Catania and was the only one on the bus for a while. The bus driver also couldn't stop talking (he was very friendly too) since I was sitting upfront.

I've met people on many forms of public transport - trains, ferries, planes, etc. A confined space and a captive audience makes it easy. It really helps to speak the local language though.

In Paris the sidewalks around the Seine were great for people watching, but actual interaction is a different story. The best interactions were in the aforementioned Germany. In the States I've found no real parallels to that.

So Agnes I'm guessing the train is quite different from the tube, metro, and subway, where eye contact and conversation is avoided at all costs. I recall riding with grandpa on the NYC subway when he remarked to a lady nearby, "Ma'am, that's a fine looking boy you have there." Now , grandpa was the most decent man I've known, but doggone if that lady didn't look at him like he was crazy and quickly moved away. Live and learn. This event occurred back in the 70s.

By the way, Big Mike, how is your dear friend, Leroy/Dwayne? Perhaps he has made friends with “locals” somewhere and is living happily after. One can on,y hope.

Norma nothing happening on that front until May. The good news is Dwayne is optimistic of getting a factory/delivery job starting at $15/hour with benefits. Fingers crossed! He hates the cold and Europe can be darned cold even in May. Fortunately Italy has not entered the conversation.

BTW we had a couple of nice conversations with cab drivers in Dublin.

So Agnes I'm guessing the train is quite different from the tube,
metro, and subway, where eye contact and conversation is avoided at
all costs.

It's not only the train that's different, but the passenger profile and trip purpose is different too. Folks traveling for leisure on long distance trains in off-peak hours are a different category of travelers than those traveling on a subway at rush hour for a limited number of stops. For one thing, you're unlikely to get a seat on a crowded subway like NYC's MTA because it's too crowded. Also, you're not likely to converse with someone on really short trips because well, the time duration is too short. I'm not talking about conversing with people who are in their business suit in a hurry to get to work or have headphones on or are buried in their cell phone or responding to work e-mails.

If you travel on a regional train in a place like Sicily (much slower place than elsewhere) where you're facing someone else for over 1 hour at a time (you have to keep in mind, there are no assigned seats here to isolate you from others), it's hard to ignore them and vice-versa. A retired person or one who is not in a hurry or otherwise predisposed with something else is a better candidate for striking up a conversation. And like I said, elderly people are easy to talk to for a number of reasons, and they're less likely to be tethered to cell phones or laptops.

My takeaway is that you and the other person kind of have to "size up" the other - you can basically tell who is likely to be open to conversing and who isn't based on their body language, where they are, and whether their disposition is relaxed or in a hurry.

In the US people are in Walmart or Target, but they’re not going to be as open for a conversation when they are busy running errands. Similarly, I like to shop at local European grocery stores in each country, but it’s not a great locale for conversation - ever try to slow down someone in their checkout lines!

We’ve had the most success while riding the trains or buses to smaller towns - both while riding & while waiting to board. Personally for us, the smaller the town, the more we feel like we have been able to interact beyond a tourist greeting.

Local events, especially outside of the main tourist route, have been a lot of fun. Examples: Grosseto, Italy - an evening locals’ music celebration in their church, piazzas, etc. which was everything from choir singing to kids’ dance recital to excellent guitar. Torino, Italy - the MITO, which ended in Piazza San Carlo with over a 1000 people singing Italian songs in every genre from books they passed out. Wengen, Switzerland- attending the Jungfrau Marathon; locals were very entertaining! Nerja, Spain - the Féria had so many local events for the “average person & families”; we felt very local in the audience.

Another avenue to have a local experience is to take cooking classes where you can learn so much about local life from the instructor as you’re learning to cook. I think about my Verona teacher sharing about the difficulty being a female chef, along with stories of the local life in Verona as she walked us through the steps to make a real Italian coffee (which I’m still doing!)

Trains are the main place, maybe even the only place where I have had long conversations with locals. I like that it comes naturally on a longer train ride, especially if you happen to be sharing a table seat with someone.

It should not be a planned or forced event.

Well said Emma!

Cities in the UK, particularly in central London are not the social hubs that people seem to think they are - it will most likely be work colleagues having a quick drink after work before they undertake the 60-90 minute commute home. The only social interaction in pubs is with those that you have gone there with, as people tend not to speak to strangers. It’s not that people are antisocial, but it’s just not the norm to strike up a conversation with a stranger.

Village pubs are more relaxed, but relatively few on this forum visit villages, it’s just London/York/Bath etc.

What's your hobby? Find similar on your travels. For example, I quilt and am a birder. I might work a quilt show or conference into an itinerary. Sure, some will be tourists, but as many will be locals. A chat about a quilt can lead to a shared lunch, then both on their own way. As a bird watcher, even if I hire a guide for a day, they are local and a one on one day means discussing a lot of other things waiting for birds to appear. Or there are groups like Audubon Society Chapters that offer field trips with 'non professional' birders, or a website where you can approach local birders to share a few hours birdingon their turf.
I would rather talk with a stranger on a shared interest, than stumble along making small talk with Joe Local on the bus.

Why does Emma always get the "well saids"? Yes her posts are outstanding but it's not like the rest of us are hamburgers at a steak dinner.

Love and peace :-)

I think Emma gets a "well said" because she is right on point. This topic has been discussed over and over. Living like a local is a myth and meeting locals is a daily occurrence in restaurants, hotels, small shops, etc. Just don't expect a long conversation, after all, they are working.

Some of my most humorous interactions with locals was on the city bus in Columbus, Ohio. Completely different experience than riding a bus in Germany. My son and I still laugh about it. Pointed out a Popeyes and the lady sitting across from us was astounded that we don't have Popeyes where we live. Told her we lived in Frankfurt and that there was a Popeyes on Base in Wiesbaden, but we hardly ever make it there. Her question - What's a Base. Her little boy was all excited about Halloween and chatted with us for about 30 min. There were more interactions and eavesdropping on conversations on this bus were like gold.

In the US, I would go to a dog park to meet people. If you play chess, go to a park where the seniors are sitting playing. Local festivals, fish frys, quilt shows, black powder shoots, pow-wows are all good places to go and meet locals.

Our best interactions with locals have been on European cruises and occasionally when forced to share a table in a pub or packed restaurant.

Laundromat! You and the other guy(s) are there for an extended period, not much else to do.

In Germany and Austria it isn't that hard to meet with the locals, at least for a bit of a chit-chat, to strike up a conversation, ...just depends on the mood, the person(s), and timing and the place.

I have talked to locals the most on trains, ie, other passengers, probably, but also in train station eateries, night train compartments, hostels after dinner, riding the day trains in compartments in Austria, obviously, at breakfast in the Pension, talk to the restaurant staff or the proprietor when it's slow, etc...all depends.

Do I make it point to engage in conversation with locals (only in German)...yes, sometimes more than others.

How American tourists meet the locals in yurp.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkzx-48zCt0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vs0D4-pVQdQ

I avoid the quiet carriage after I travelled in one where a fellow
passenger reprimanded the person sitting next to me for eating crisps
which were apparently too noisy. The situation wasn’t helped when I
got the giggles.

Having my own fit of the giggles here.

I think getting reprimanded for improper behavior technically counts as meeting the locals.

Comes to mind a time I was on the bus in Rome, at "rush hour." I met my friend. We hopped on the bus to go to our destination. I bumped into a passenger getting on, said excuse me in Italian, he replied no worries in Italian.

At one stop, a woman near me was ready to depart. I moved to the side of my friend as close as I could to let her pass. Another woman standing at the pole started to reprimand me in Italian. I answered her in English. Anyway, she went on and on about the etiquette of people getting off the bus. She told me I should step off the bus to allow passengers to get off. I told her that was a bit silly since others were trying to board at the same time. And, what if I could not get back on due to the rush?? Oh, and I also asked her how come she did not move to depart the bus since she and I were "inches from each other,." No answer.

She looked to another passenger, said something, but the other woman rolled her eyes and looked away. The man I bumped into, who was still standing (near the door), ignored her. My friend said something to her in Italian. She shut up, lol, and got off two stops away -- neither the man at the door (he had some type of uniform on or the other woman next to her "stepped off the bus to allow her to pass."

Of course there is a difference between people watching and interacting.

I don't think anyone is suggesting approaching some random Wal Mart shopper and trying to engage them in conversation, although it would be pretty funny if a late night comedian did this for a skit. Still, if you want to see a good cross section of Americana, Wally World and McDonald's would present a reasonably accurate portrayal.

And yes, a train or tour group also presents an opportunity to engage others in brief conversation. I sometimes find myself a bit reticent as I don't want to open the door to conversation only to regret it an hour later.

I'd love to see a video of an American tourist randomly chatting up a Brit in a pub, like Rick Steves apparently does with some success.

Mike, aside from the "bus lady," lol, I've had a ton of great interactions with locals in Italy (both trips) all over -- stores, restaurants -- two Italian men sitting near me struck up a conversation with me; on the auto bus, at breakfast at my hotel, there were a couple of Italian businessmen (curious about my traveling alone, lol.) Actually, I got that question a few times. I didn't get into the ins and outs of plans changing traveling with someone; no need to. I went solo and that was that.

I also met fellow Americans here and there. An elderly couple were so sweet -- they stopped me to ask directions to Piazza Navona. I had just come from there! So, I felt really good to help them out. The man had a cane, navigated it okay, but was grateful "they were close." I guess they got a bit lost.

My first trip to Rome, as I was standing in line for the Vatican Museums, the group I was in had 4 people from England traveling around Rome for a few days, and then they were off to Florence.

Both times, for different reasons, plans changed with traveling with someone. Thinking back, recalling my adventures, meeting the people I met, the experiences I had, seeing what I saw, I may not have had those pleasures had I not been by myself. I don't regret it.

Emma is getting many "well said" comments, etc., because what she wrote is spot on. A couple months ago, someone asked, in part, where one can meet the locals in Boston. When seeing it asked about the city I live in, the question was curious to me. If people are visiting Boston and wanting to meet locals, are they seeking those who are natives? Moved here from elsewhere? People who talk and look like characters from Ben Affleck movies (i.e., white people with accents from certain Boston neighborhoods)?

The locals abroad are in the same places they are you live - shops, events, restaurants, discount stores, libraries, etc. The best bet is to consider how you would interact with locals where you live, as well as any local customs that exist where you're going, and interact accordingly.

I typically travel solo, and as others have said, I've had several wonderful conversations and interactions with "locals" on trains over the years: A young German man on his way to a football match in Nurenberg, which led to a conversation about the Nurenberg trials (he brought it up!); a young French nun on an Italian train, who shared her picnic lunch with me and chatted about everything imaginable (in English and French). Then there was the memorable for a different reason encounter with a young Italian couple when I was traveling from Italy to Portugal; this was in the '90s when most of the seats were in couchettes (where the 2 rows of seats could fold together to form one big bed-like area); the 3 of us were in one for an overnight portion of trip and had pushed the seats together to sleep ... or so I thought until I wake up with the woman's foot in my face, and then on my neck, as she and the guy eagerly engage in "not sleeping."
It helps a great deal to speak some of the local language ... I often travel to France, and French is the only other language I can "get by" in. I've lost count of the wonderful conversations I've had over the years with Parisians: with a young man at a late-night bakery/cafe who, when I told him that I'm from North Carolina, talks about how if he makes it to the U.S. his dream is to see the Great Smoky Mountains (how often do you hear that from a foreigner??!), so I tell him about Asheville, Savannah, and the Blue Ridge Parkway. Or the conversation with a bouquiniste in 1998, who tells me that "Saving Private Ryan" has just opened at a theater and the line for tickets snaked down the street for blocks ... he then told me that his father had been in the Resistance, and at that point he got choked up, looked me in the eye, and emotionally said how grateful he is to America for what they did in the war. A few years ago I was in Turin, Italy, and popped in to a small antique shop. As I pointed at a few small objects in the window, in my horrible Italian I told the shopkeeper I didn't speak Italian ... she spoke no English. I laughingly asked "parlez-vous Francais?" We proceeded to have a one-hour conversation in French (granted, I only understood about half of it) >> it was one of the most memorable experiences of that trip.
I could go on but you get the picture ... in my experience, you can meet people just about anywhere as long as you are open and friendly, be aware of cues, and it doesn't hurt to learn even a tiny bit of the language.

Emma, noted lol.

I would be completely hopeless trying to chat someone up. Polar opposite of Hugh Grant.

Having read this thread about “meeting” with locals, and all the others just like it, I have to conclude that I am the least friendly, least gregarious contributor on this forum. It never occurs to me to “chat” with a stranger nor do I want a stranger trying to chat with me. Of course, I never travel solo so maybe that is partly the reason........ I have companions to talk to. Anyhow, if you are unilingually English, you would have to be pretty lucky to engage in a worthwhile conversation, or even a minimally interesting conversation, in say, Italy or the French countryside, or a small town in Belgium. So, there you are, a different take on the “chat with locals” thing. I await the slings and arrows.

As Laura B pointed out, a laundromat. That assumes you are traveling longer than a week and don't wash your underwear in the sink. The real answer to this question is not where you are but how you are.

Pretext. There has to be a pretext, and in the case of interacting in any meaningful way with locals going about their daily business (that is, in a way that affords you some insight into what its like to be a local), thats nearly impossible. In my lifetime I have lived in several places where others come to vacation, and I have worked in places that support the tourist industry. In those situations, I have interacted a lot with tourists (I am the local) and I am interested in them and vice versa. I enjoy hearing what brought them to my town and what they do in their 'normal' lives, and they are interested in what life is like as a local. But these conversations have the pretext of us both being in this tourist economy relationship. I do enjoy very much having conversations about where people live and why they live there. I am truly interested in the appeal of political/cultural/physical geography that lures people or holds them where they end up living. So if that kind of conversation were possible in some naturally occurring way, Id love it, but its rare. We have broached many conversations with brits through conversations about futbol and TV. But that was in Greece! I spent a day talking about Yorkshire with a couple from Yorkshire because I am obsessed with Sally Wainwright and we got chatting. My husband has zero interest in American sports but can tell you every last detail about european futbol teams, so that open up a lot of coversations. But to just crack open chatting on a bus with no pretext; absurd

lol, Perhaps I was in a "different Rome, Italy." I didn't have to work that hard to have a conversation anywhere.

Have kids. Seriously. Locals had absolutely no problem approaching us and talking to us and especially our kids.

And if you’re in Texas, feel free to start a conversation with a stranger in the grocery store or anywhere. That’s just something we do everyday.

How about this line for chatting to some random guy or gal at a pub: "Hey buddy (or bloke or blokette), you English sure have done well for yourselves. Shakespeare, Newton, the Beatles. What is it something in the water?"

In that one line I've injected humor, charm, friendliness, and knowledge. What's not to like?

It never occurs to me to “chat” with a stranger nor do I want a
stranger trying to chat with me. Of course, I never travel solo so
maybe that is partly the reason

There are a lot of "nevers" in there (you know what they say about saying "never")...by the way, some people do travel solo and may be more outgoing and sociable. There's nothing wrong with striking up a chat with a willing stranger - it's a two-way street with zero commitment implied. If it's reciprocated, then great! If not, then hardly any loss. That's the beauty of being human - wanting to connect with others extends beyond one's immediate surroundings. Some folks here should lighten up, it's just a conversation, not a life sentence. Traveling solo makes you generally more open and accessible to meet others, that's a given.

In the US, I found Texans to be probably the most friendly and easy to talk with (in just about any setting). Overseas, obviously there are different cultural norms but I've personally never found it that hard to meet a local, even if superficially.

feel free to start a conversation with a stranger in the grocery store or anywhere. That’s just something we do everyday.

Agreed.

Perhaps most of my best memories of travel involve people. The taxi driver in Dublin. The waitress in Cork. The VRBO owner in Paris. Our German neighbors in Heidelberg. Random people I met during a volksmarch. I could go on...

If I see one of you fine folks down the road, depending on the situation I may chat with you a bit, but I won't be tedious nor overbearing. If you're disinterested in talking that's fine, too.

Out in American rural areas it is common to strike up a conversation with strangers. Start with the weather.

I call to mind riding the train. Yes, most are business people riding early. But, during the summer months, there are the visitors. I've had conversations with them, answering their questions or maybe giving suggestions. And, if there is a little kid, watching their excitement telling me "I'm going to the Prudential Tower," lol. Cute. I don't mind. And who knows, maybe I can learn something from them too. It has happened.

At the beginning of last year, I traveled to Pittsburgh and Grand Rapids, two cities I had not been before. I had lovely and unique experiences. Perhaps being approachable and very friendly can play a big part.

In Pittsburgh, I met a couple of nice people I had chats with. One worked in the Dean's office at the University.

In Grand Rapids, the woman who ran the dining breakfast buffet every day was so nice. We had fun conversations after the crowd moved on with their day. I had leisure time in the mornings to talk with her for awhile. We exchanged numbers...she talks fast and is very funny! Good woman!

Richard, for efficiency I travel with old socks, undershirts, and underwear that I just throw away.

I met some nice locals in Korea who I had lunch with and I impressed them with my ability to read hangeul and my basic spoken Korean. Then they tried to recruit me for their cult.

Mike, the restaurant I went to had its share of locals. One gentleman was a regular. He'd see me come in most nights, sit at my little table and order...chat with the waitstaff.

One night, one of the guys came up to my table and leaned in. He asked if I had any plans the next evening. I was not sure where it was going. He went on to explain that the gentleman was interested in taking me for a drink." The man was retired from the Carabinieri (a man that wore a uniform, interesting...) The man was sort of shy, spoke no English. That took guts. I was impressed.

I found out that a couple of nights when I wasn't there, he asked about me. I asked how we could communicate. I didn't speak enough Italian to have a full conversation flow. He knew no English. Don't think google translate would really work or make sense for full on conversations. Well, there was a solution. The man would bring along his friend who speaks fluent Italian and English. The man was willing to do that "to take the lady for a cocktail." A lot of very nice people!

Laundromat! Exactly. Over the course of two trips we have cruised by narrowboat for Middlewich to Llangollen. Both time we (the guys) ended up doing laundry in the laundromat in Ellesemere. The wives explore while the guys do laundry. Most of the time in the laundromat is spent doing nothing. This last time there was also a older local gentleman doing his laundry. We initially spoke to him to change some bills to coins. Once things got going we spent about an hour talking to the fellow. He was retired and chose of Ellesmere because he enjoyed the kind of singing they do there. We discussed his life and and finally the discussion turned to Brexit and why he had he voted for it. A very interesting conversation. A laundromat is a pretty low key environment.

Another way to meet locals is to do something that locals do. We did not meet any other Americans on our net of three weeks of narrowboat cruising. The women, who the operated the locks, had plenty of opportunity to talk with other women as they waited to work their boat through the locks. The men got to talk to the other men as we waited, tied along the canal, to take our boat through the lock. At least once the conversation started with a comment “I can tell from your accent that you are not from around here”.

A lot of people walk and dog walk along the tow path of the canal. On morning we had a long conversation with a older couple (older than us, we are 70ish) about living in the country during WW2. Very interesting.

We have found that taking a cooking class is a good way to meet locals. A four hour class in a local lady’s kitchen gives you a lot of time to talk about things other than cooking. Such as the instructor’s still living grandmother who had survived one of Hitler’s concentration camps.

Hiring a private tour guide for a 1/2 day gives you a chance to talk about a lot stuff more than the tour. Such as why Spanish boys wear sailor suits for their first communion.

Riding on a train as a couple makes it a little more difficult to strike up a conversation you are not really sitting next to anyone. But when I worked in Norway and often rode the train by myself, I would often have extended conversations with young Norwegians who were happy to practice their English on a native speaker.

Hobbies also give one a conversation starter. As a fisherman I have often initiated a conversation with someone sitting on the bank with a fishing pole. One time a fellow initiated a conversation with me because he thought my small, retro styled digital camera was a film camera. He was film camera enthusiast.

Girasole, have you ever read 1000 nights in Venice by Malena Di Blasi? She married the man who phoned her at her Venice restaurant table asking her for a drink. I enjoyed her Italy books.

Nice! No Maria, I will look it up. Thank you!

Mike, sort of hijacked your thread, but, any time I come across something inspirational, well, I like to share!

People, wherever, whatever, local or abroad, have fun and live your dreams :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdkVzkIGjp0

I never think about “ meeting locals “ , sometimes I have some pleasant interactions with them , but it’s not why I personally travel , I love history , seeing historical sites , eating local specialties, drinking local wines, seeing world of art , enjoying beaches and walks , locals live their lives I live mine and if we happen to chat in a line up or cafe , great !! But I am so happy I am not preoccupied with this need to interact in some mystical way with strangers just for the sake of it .

But I am so happy I am not preoccupied with this need to interact in some mystical way with strangers just for the sake of it .

I don't think that's true. A lot of interactions are happenstance or just naturally being friendly. From those, come some nice friendships.

"mystical way?" Maybe some divine intervention to bring people together.

Girasole, that was lovely. Thank you. What's the rest of the story with the Italian guy?

As for interactions or lack thereof, maybe we're products of where we're from? People living in the country or more rural areas tend to be more engaging with random strangers, and perhaps others are just naturally reticent.

Thanks Mike! It was really nice, a good time. The man was sweet, quiet, humble.. We had fun. No regrets.

Meeting the locals is a part I always look forward to in all my trips. It helps me truly connect with the place and sometimes the story from the tours. Public transport is a good place to meet people so I use it when it's convenient. Also, sometimes, parks and public spaces can be a good avenue to make friends. Some of my friends sometimes go as far as making friends over social media before visiting a place but I haven't tried that yet. Some travel agencies also are comprised mostly of locals. I once had a local friend who I made from a travel agency, he invited me to have dinner with his family and it was a delightful experience.

It helps me truly connect with the place and sometimes the story from the tours.

True in many situations. I love churches, museums, etc. St. Peter's is etched in my mind for many reasons. But, the memories you make with people, those stay long embedded, or at least for me.

Maria, if you're following the thread. I looked up the book. Looks like a fun read. Goodness, so many heavy critics though. In quickly scanning the content, it seems the writer just wrote from "her heart." It seems she ended up on the right page...sorry, corny, yeah....

As we've seen on the forum, it's a lot of hard work and sacrifice to leave your 'home country' to go abroad. I applaud those who've done so!

finds the home she didn’t even know she was missing. < LOVE that!

Kindle edition is only $2. I'll order it and have fun reading vicariously.

"In an authentic way in their natural habitat" sounds like the locals are zoo animals...

I'm one of those city people who, depending on my mood and what I've got going on at that particular moment, will either a) take pity on lost tourists struggling to make sense of the streets around here; b) completely ignore them and go on about my day; or c) become extremely annoyed they walk at a snail's pace, side-by-side, completely holding up people who are trying to get past them to get to the T. Because I live somewhere that experiences a good chunk of tourists, I don't have this pressing need to try to chat up the locals when I'm on vacation or traveling on business. I let them be - but I will say I've noticed when I travel solo I inevitably end up peaking the interest of some locals - much more so than when I travel with someone.

I also notice that my interactions with them frequently involve one or more of the following: cigarettes, alcohol, dirty clothing, small art galleries, dance, theater, concerts, soccer and public squares/parks or other green space. Not suggesting you take up smoking, but whether it's Timbuktu or Turin if I step outside to light up I almost always get a local approaching me (in their local language) looking to use my lighter and join me. Once they realize I'm not from there, they often start asking lots of questions and talking up their city giving me lots of suggestions. Same with the laundromat - Europeans aren't used to seeing tourists hanging around doing their laundry and it's such a dull chore that people are looking for a distraction. So stop dumping your underwear in trashcans along the way and instead stop in your local self-serve laundromat. Even if no one talked to you there, at least you'd walk out of the place with clean clothing, so it's not a complete waste of time.

I am like Pat, in that I don't try to meet others and don't make people interactions part of my travel experience. In fact, I will admit that posts like this and those gregarious types that do chat with folks easily, actually led to me feeling self conscious because during 3 weeks in Spain pretty much no one talked with me and I didn't chat with any others - including tourists - except on my birding days. I had 'places to go, things to see'. Not that I am not approachable, but I clearly wasn't in places that make casual conversation easier. Perhaps I need to actually dine out at dinner instead of lunch - and at the same restaurant. Or test the ciccheti bars in Venice....at least to see whether chance conversations improve travel memories.
I was surprised as to how friendly San Antonio folk are - walk up the neighbourhood street and folks on their stoop will call out a hello and 'haven't seen you around before, where are you from? How do you like the city?'. Though not all the locals are that friendly :-(
Girasole, yes, Marlena gets criticized, but I enjoyed the escapism. She has other books as well along a similar vein. As a sewist, I enjoyed all her clothing creations out of draperies :-)

One sure fire winner is when the local team is playing (Football, Rugby, Cricket, Hockey, Curling). Most of the average people aren't at the game. They're watching it with others at a local watering hole. I've found people are already chatting with others they don't know. It's easy to become part of the conversation and end up with new acquaintances. I was in Paris during the most recent World Cup. One night France was playing an early match and the crowd was cheering for them. I ended up knowing maybe ten new French people.

A couple nights later England was playing. I went to the same place and saw some of the people I'd met earlier, and met some English expats who were working or studying in Paris.

I had a similar experience watching the Lyon football team at a watering hole in Lyon.

For your philosophical amusement, here are a couple random theories about meeting locals.

I am a native San Diegan (there aren't that many real ones but not quite zoo animals yet). Part of being a "true" San Diegan (pardon my logical fallacy) is being pretentiously unpretentious - in other words we look down our noses at anyone who is pretentious. Friends always comment on my outgoing nature and how I will talk to anyone, anywhere - whether it's a U.S. Senator in DC or the lady cleaning the toilet in the train station. I always answer, "You should see my mom. She even embarrassed me."

It also helps to be an introvert, yes introvert. Many people (myself included until recently) believe an introvert is shy, retiring and not likely to talk to strangers. While that may be true in some cases, the core of an introvert is you're happy with yourself so aren't concerned whether others see you favorably or not. An extrovert might be outgoing generally but literally needs to be received favorably. The risk of talking to strangers, to them, is much greater than I perceive it to be.

I agree that as an introvert, or one perceived as such, a person has certain advantages in meeting locals if he wants to at that moment, all the more so when one is traveling solo especially on trains, guided tours, train station eateries or waiting on train platforms, and obviously in hostels.

While that may be true in some cases, the core of an introvert is you're happy with yourself so aren't concerned whether others see you favorably or not

That is very true. (I am an introvert who writes about being an introvert.) However, sometimes if I do get the urge to talk to a stranger I don't because I'm so aware that I might feel, in their place, "being bothered."

Perfect example: We don't get that many foreign tourists in the town of 1000 people where I live in rural Massachusetts. But once I heard two guys in their thirties conversing at an outdoor snack bar in a language I did not recognize, from the 8 or so languages I know and the others I can recognize even if I don't speak them. I really wanted to ask them what language that was. And we would probably have had an interesting conversation. But it would have meant interrupting them, so I did not do it. If it were one person alone who had, say, spoken the language on their cell phone and then put it down, I probably would have spoken to them.

Interesting discussion but I think it is the personality of the individuals involved. As a former faculty member, elected public official, and a wife involved in public education, we are very comfortable moving through a crowd of strangers, introducing ourselves, shaking hands, kissing babies, initiating conversations and moving on is very easy for us. I think we have developed body language, facial expressions, that invite interactions. And I think we are good at reading the body language of the other person to know how to continue. So we have no problems of interacting with locals at their level without being overbearing or boring. It is fairly second nature for us so we don't think a lot about it. We make eye contact and try to make you feel important.

...see whether chance conversations improve travel memories..... Some of our best memories are the interactions with locals. Or, more accurately, what I learned from these interactions. We don't go looking for interactions in a forced way but if the opportunity occurs, we are eager to take advantage.

Here's a good topic for an introvert to open a conversation with: "What is the tipping custom here?"

But my favorite, is to say "Sure, I'll sign your petition."

I have hesitated to add to this discussion but I have to agree with Emma. Though I'm sure that's not how it was intended, wanting to meet and talk to locals in their natural habitat sounds like we view residents of of other countries as either people in a human zoo or as people who are there for our entertainment. We have traveled quite a bit for decades and have had many interactions and conversations with others. Often when asking for directions, sitting on a bench, in a cafe or restaurant. Most often the conversation is started by others who are interested in where we came from or our opinions on something. Sometimes they are tourists from a different country. Yes, we are interested in meeting others, especially people who live in other countries. Their views, opinions, and information about daily life in their countries are interesting and add to our understanding of the world,and the conversations are usually entertaining. But these interactions are usually spontaneous.

I hope these comments are not misinterpreted. Most of us like to interact with others and,from reading the responses, have had lots of interesting experiences. But generally, these cannot be forced.

I am just sitting here wondering if I can make some money out of being a local in my natural habitat.
maybe set up a tour company so you can come to my work and see me working away or follow me on my way home walking the mile or so from my work to my home, come and have a cup of tea,help me with the dishes and maybe cut the grass while I get the Barbie out. You could also watch me washing my clothes and then help me hang it out on the washing line if the weather is dry..Maybe I could show you some of the other locals I interact with on a daily basis, the local bin man, the local postie, the local shopkeeper and the local alcoholic tapping you for 50pence. maybe we could do a tour of the dog crap covered streets and have a real interaction with a local dog walker and discuss why they let their dog crap where they do ( oh what fun that could be),so much to see and do with these locals in their natural habitat I am sure there must be some opportunity to charge people to experience it all.

folk visiting Edinburgh will only have a 1 in10 chance of interacting with a local ,we avoid the city centre as much as we can ,too crowded and too expensive and most other tourist cities will be the same.

I am beginning to hate the word “locals” as used in the context of this thread. It makes the residents of a foreign country sound like a different species of human being.

Despite the disparaging remarks, aside from chance encounters, there are some organizations of locals willing to meet tourists and introduce them to their city. Not sure that will include discussions with the dog walkers or opportunities for hoovering the stairs, but I am sure one can ask to spend time in the local laundromat or ask about their favourite hole in the wall restaurant.
Global Greeters works in several cities and offers free 2-3 hours with a volunteering local. They don't do guided tours - so don't replace the tour guides - but they can wander you around a neighbourhood, chat over a cup of coffee and a more 'day to day' perspective of a place. (Uncle Gus, maybe you can volunteer there with your concept of a fun time ;-)). Is this authentic enough? Not sure, but if it leads to a discussion about the neighbourhood, politics, family and community make up, it would be 'authentic' enough for some.
Though this is article is about 'free tour guides', there are recommendations that really encompass 'meeting the locals' (she gives permission to share links)
https://solotravelerworld.com/solo-travel-free-guide/
There are other organizations that get global travelers together with the intent of sharing lodgings and reciprocating opening their home to others. I am sure if you want to offer to hoover or do laundry, they would be happy to oblige, but just chatting over the breakfast table might be authentic enough.

Frank, always good to shake hands and kiss babies - just don't get them mixed up.

Locals is a term I grew up with. Some surf spots were "locals only". If we want to be international, we can say les habitants, los habitantes or die Bewohner.

I guess I'm one of the exceptions. I'm not bothered by visitors, (it goes with the territory) nor do I view the term 'locals' as derogatory or insulting. Good thing when I needed help in Rome, people didn't feel put out.

BIGMIKE,

Come to NJ. We started opening “meet the locals zoo”. Talk with us. Buy some food and feed us. Walk around with us. Pet us. And so on.

Point well taken, say it in a foreign language instead...totally agree...en français, auf deutsch.

One of the advantages in not using a Smartphone in Germany or Austria is that when it comes to asking for directions, no need to rely on the Smartphone, etc. but ask the local who happens to be living right there, in which case, that's the "Anwohner."

That offers me the excuse to engage the Anwohner, be it a guy/ woman working on the car, walking the dog, or riding by on a bike, etc. in German, even if it's perfunctory conversation.

In smaller cities and towns, this works very well.

Interesting thread! I recently realized with a start that I am a "local" for visitors to California. Last month I waved two young (foreign) women into seats I had "sort of" been saving at a crowded food place in the Ferry Building – and when they looked so grateful, it occurred to me that such interactions might have some bearing on how pleasant their trip to SF was. (So I resolved to try to be more courteous! haha). Near the Maritime Museum we had a delightful conversation with three young women from Australia, Indonesia, and Senegal when they asked us to take their photograph. (It turned out the young lady from Australia was studying for a year at my son's alma mater – quite a coincidence – and the other two are exchange students at the SoCal uni where my brother teaches.)

I've posted in other threads about how some of our (unintentional, un-sought-out) interactions with "locals" in the UK have provided some of our fondest memories. A lady I met on a long-distance coach ride from Lincolnshire to London is insisting I come stay with her in Grimsby (!). She had many interesting stories, including that her brother's RAF uniform is in a museum in Texas b/c he had saved some pilots from crashing during WWII pilot training there. A sheep farmer in Devon and his wife invited us in for tea and shared lots of local gossip (apparently there is lots of intrigue in their tiny "chocolate box" village – who knew?) when we met at a small Remembrance Sunday observance – they had lived in the U.S. and been the "recipients of acts of great kindness from Americans". I exchanged email addresses with a woman I met at an adult ballet class in Berkshire; she looks so English you'd never guess she was a graduate student in Los Angeles many years ago and had swum in the Pacific Ocean and attended games at the Rose Bowl. We attend local church services when we travel because we enjoy it, and have had memorable conversations during the inevitable tea and cookies after the service – one lady at a tiny church in Cornwall asking what our president's hand gestures meant (I haven't a clue!); people at a church in Muddles Green (now there's a wonderful name!) asking if we were moving to the area (I wish!); travel advice and stories from the folks at a tiny historic church in Oxfordshire. A farmer in Cornwall asking us what kind of cows we have in our semi-rural area (ummm .... they are black and white?).

What these interactions have in common is that we did not seek them out; people with some kind of link to or interest in the U.S. sought us out. BUT they saw that we were interested in their lives (reading the council news about converting phone boxes into defibrillator stations, for example); AND we were in small towns and villages, doing mundane, real-life activities like taking a National Express coach; attending church; taking a ballet class; going for a walk and poking around, puzzling over signs about "dogs worrying sheep". Pursuing one's hobby (one of my husband's colleagues took a ballroom dance class during his latest business trip to the UK; we did a course in tower-bell ringing at an Oxford church) leads to natural interactions and some life-long friendships.

But you'll get these interactions (if you want them or not; sometimes we've been desperate to get away from a chatty "local", haha!) at a small village in Dartmoor, not in the Cotswolds during high season; at Mên-an-Tol or Lanyon Quoit, not at Stonehenge; at a small village in Lincolnshire, not in London! As PPs said above, Londoners, like New Yorkers, are just trying to get to work on their long commute, plus they see hordes of tourists all the time.

I recall riding with grandpa on the NYC subway when he remarked to a
lady nearby, "Ma'am, that's a fine looking boy you have there." Now ,
grandpa was the most decent man I've known, but doggone if that lady
didn't look at him like he was crazy and quickly moved away. Live and
learn. This event occurred back in the 70s.

I believe it! The 70s were rough! Today when I've seen something especially cute in a child with his/her parent on the subway or bus, I've smiled and said something like "simply adorable". The parents always smile and say thank you.

I live in quite the tourist city and tourists do come to talk to me typically initially when asking for directions while waiting to cross the street and then they segue into something else if they are curious about something. I don't mind at all. That doesn't typically happen on the subway or any train.

The first step is to get out of the comfort zone. Do not look for your nationality or franchise in another country. Approach to locals, show your interest and go with the flow.

One guaranteed way to "meet a local" is to go to a non-touristy place, preferably somewhere small without much to do.

People will be so confused as to your presence that you will get to interact with people, even if it's starts with, in effect, "Why the hell are you here?"

You'll be an object of curiosity and may find that you get to interact with the locals way more than you ever wanted.

Or just go to Yorkshire, they will not leave you alone up there, I swear.

There's always one who wants to shoehorn some commerical spam into a thread!

*Edit. The post has now gone so mine is now redundant!

Like Richard said:

The real answer to this question is not where you are but how you are.

I talk to strangers at home and abroad or they talk to me. I likely have conversations with more people I don't know than those I know, each day. Equal on who starts the conversation, but in all activities I treat people in a polite, friendly way and things usually go on from there. Although, there are some I won't talk to at any price. It's all body language, being aware of what's going on around me and who's open, who might need help, etc. So, I don't treat people in foreign countries like museum pieces that talk, but just like people at home that I converse with as I/we go thru our days. Solo gets more conversation, but my husband seems to attract people as well...he's an extremely nice person. Why only enjoy strangers while on vacation? Oh, and I'm an introvert, which just means we recharge alone vs with people. It doesn't mean we don't like people.

Where you are is definitely a factor which increases your chances of talking to a local, especially if that is to be done in the local language.

The few trips I found that taking the train in Austria and the CD train in Czechia especially when it's a six seat compartment enhances the possibilities of getting into a conversation. I've had that happen several times be it a day or night train.

One guaranteed way to "meet a local" is to go to a non-touristy place,
preferably somewhere small without much to do.

People will be so confused as to your presence that you will get to
interact with people, even if it's starts with, in effect, "Why the
hell are you here?"

You'll be an object of curiosity and may find that you get to interact
with the locals way more than you ever wanted.

Really....I love neighborhood & college bookstores and enjoy getting myself lost in the shelves. No locals (or tourists) probably even know that I am a visitor let alone wonder "why the hell are you here?"

Thus I am lost as to why you think someone would see another person perusing through books as "an object of curiosity".

Thus I am lost as to why you think someone would see another person perusing through books as "an object of curiosity".

There is such a thing as being obviously out of place. Some of us can't help it because of our race, size (my brother-in-law is 6' 8" and was woefully conspicuous in Guatemala), inability to speak the local language, manner of dress or simply not knowing where anything is. Or just being a stranger in a small town where everyone knows everyone else.

I remember once on a cross-country road trip in the USA, somewhere in Oklahoma or Kansas, we got off the main drag and drove into a small town to have lunch at a local diner on the main street. I felt we were very conspicuously out of place and that it would have been obvious to anyone that we were outsiders. I can't pin this down to a definite, rational reason, but it was something I strongly felt the way you feel positive or negative vibes in a place for no apparent reason.

If you are in a place , eg, a small town, village, a certain site, museum, or some esoteric place, where it is highly unexpected to see foreign visitors, you will attract attention or at least be noticed by the locals as the outsider, all the more so, if you can't speak the language and have to rely on someone else's English.

I've been in numerous such places in Germany over the years going to places as Wesel am Rhein, Siegen, Porta Westfalica, Seelow, Dortmund-Hohensyburg, Frankfurt an der Oder, Schleswig, Rheinsberg, Neustrelitz, Albstadt Lautlingen south of Hechingen, etc, etc. tracking down museums, sites,

To get the maximum assistance, when needed, exposure to the locals, I just freely speak German to them.

Rick Steves has an article and a video on this website.

When you're at a bar or pub, engage someone in conversation, just like you would anywhere else, like in the States where you might say, "Hey, how about them Bears?"

The one of the best “off beat” experiences we had with connecting with people was in a self service laundry in Bayeux, France. The small laundry had no attendant, instructions totally in French and were configured such we no previous experience. As we fumbled around a lady came in with a load of sleeping bags to be cleaned. She did not speak English but sensed our plight, took our coins and showed us the way. Soon pictures of families were shown and rough communication evolved. It was lunch time so I went around the corner for drinks and sandwich jambon for all. We helped her, she helped us and we said a warm, friendly good bye.