Lessons Learned the Hard Way

At least you're learning. Some people don't.

I think your number two is an especially valid point, but I think most folks coming in from 12 hr plus flights should not start off on a car trip that day unless they are experienced.. jet lagged is not a good time to figure out a whole new road system Don't agree completely with number three, I like summer travel , do it alot , and other then Rome is way too hot in summer , I haven't found much negative ... I actually try and time my Paris visits for August as they often have hotel deals on them.

I think those points have been the common sense recommendations on this site for long time.

1) Stay in a centrally located hotel central to the sights and places you want to visit. We stayed up in the Alps(Muerren) for a whole week using our timeshare (to save money) and while it was an awesome experience, staying there for 2-3 days would have been enough. We travelled all over Switzerland and our Mueren location restricted us time wise. We had to plan our day-trips round the vagaries of the gondola. 2) Everyone has a different way of travelling and its hard to please all when u're planning a group trip. Last year I planned a trip to London and Scotland for 4 people and it was mentally exhausting trying to convince people of certain things- (time is money, logistics of planning the sights to see vs just winging it as we had limited time etc etc.) These people had not even done their research and didn't want to listen to someone who ahd done her research. Never again. We still had an awesome time but I was drained by the end of the trip. 3) Take an enormous amount of food and water for toddlers. Then double the amount and take it. This July I travelled with my 4 year old to DC from Seattle by myself and though I had taken plenty of food (or so I thought). She literally wanted food like every half an hour.

- Review your flight times occasionally after you book them. Sometimes these change. - An hour and a half to change planes at Heathrow Terminal 5 might work but will be very stressful. After the passport control there's a tram that leads to your next gate. - Review your plans about a month out. You might learn a museum will be closed for renovations while you are there. You might learn that the Anne Frank house has timed entry passes that skip the lines but you must order in advance (I'm not sure how far in advance, at least a week). - two weeks is long enough for adult children and parents to travel together. Three weeks was pushing it.

1) One week is long enough to spend on a tour or with travel partners. The confinement and socializing begin to wear. 2) Don't expect things to go perfectly, no matter how well you planned. 3) Expect the possibility of some sort of: injury, work strike, disappointing food, unpleasant weather, crowding, loss of belongings, imperfect hotel conditions, and missed transportation. 4) The best experience is often the one you weren't expecting. Be prepared to appreciate the people and events that appear. Drop your plans if something better comes along.

1. When searching online for airline prices, when you find a great bargain, book it right then! Do not change pages or go to another website to compare. When you come back to the site where you found the bargain fare, it will be gone, never to be found again. 2. aRies is right; (reread her number 2 item) beware of planning trips for large groups of friends, most of whom have never been to Europe before. Once you have all agreed on a country, and a rough outline of what everyone would like to see, consider choosing, as a group decision, a Rick Steves Trip, and have everyone sign up. That way, you don't get blamed or stressed out as the Trip Planner. Arguments within the group are reduced, since the itinerary is set. This also helps with Marty's item number 3; the Rick Steves tour will know which museums are closed, etc., so you avoid lost time on your group trip. Also one of Swan's number three items is covered; missed transportation.

1. Don't slow down for snags. If you have a problem, lower you heard and blast through it or ignore it. 2. Don't believe anybody. If something seems good to you, see or do it. If somebody says you gotta see X and you think it probably sucks, it will. 3. There isn't a problem that money can't solve. Travel cheaply, but when it's time to open up with the money gun, use it like a fire hose. 4, Don't waste time fretting about where to sleep - - there's always a bed somewhere. Spend the time saved reading history and everything else about where you're going. 5. You can't know a place unless you walk it. 6. Get lost regularly. 7. Trolls and goblins don't exist. Go everywhere.

I'm going through the trip planning for a group right now. Ergh. Next time, everyone is on their own! :) Honestly, the group I'm dealing with (my siblings) are all very easy going and are just happy to be on vacation, so every suggestion I've made they've said yes. But, I would like it if they would do a little research instead of me doing it all! Thanks for letting me vent! LOL Great thread too, can't wait to read more advice.

1) Don't return a rental car to the middle of a large city. 2) Especially if it's Brussels. 3) Don't forget a map.

What Ed said... Don't make too exact of a plan and you have no reason to be upset when the 'plan' falls apart, and if it's not life- threatening then don't stress over it.

Am so with Ed on the Money Gun. Even if you are a student. There are times that you need to spend Dad's money. :) I would add on a generally flying front, always take an earlier flight if offered. And I'll second the comment about not worrying where you'll sleep, something will turn up. You can always move on in the morning! Pam

Don't agree about not fretting over where to sleep and that you'll always find a bed somewhere. For me, where I stay is part of my vacation experience. I don't want just a "bed." I have that at home. I've been to Europe enough times to know what I want to do and what I want to see. We never schedule every minute of every day because it normally doesn't ever work out the way you expect. But I like having an itinerary and book all of our hotels in advance.

Ed is so right about snags and the money gun. Last month I was in France and somehow got it into my head that I could daytrip to Vezelay from Autun. There is no way without a car. I didn't have a night to spare to stay over in Vezelay, so I went as a daytrip from Paris (expensive trainfare and five hours travel roundtrip). I would not trade that day for any other. If you can, be prepared to give up something. If you must see something, it may cost you, but you won't have to deal with the "if only..."

My two top rules, learned through trial and error, are as follows: 1. Never assume anything will be true. I try to stick to this even when doing something new at home, such as riding a new bike route. But here is a European example: when we were climbing Notre Dame, I wanted to stop at the gift shop on the way up. My husband (who has only learned to follow this rule because I force him) said that surely there would be another one on the other set of stairs, on the way down. I couldn't be sure, and anyway I needed a break from the steps, and it was the right thing to do because there was not another. If I'd wanted to know for certain whether there was another, I would have asked someone. Never assume that something will exist/be open/be available. Similarly, I always check into a plane in advance if I can, after having been burned when my husband said we didn't need to bother and we were ONE minute late for checking in at Laguardia. We didn't get on another flight till the next morning. 2. This is really an iteration of #1, but important on its own: when you see a bathroom, go. You never know where the next one will be. I formulated this rule after spending 75% of my time on the Paris streets looking for somewhere to go. I was never so happy to find a McDonalds in my life....

1. Don't lose your passport. If you have 2, don't lose them both. If you do lose them both, let it be when you are staying with friends who have a large house and love you. Corollary: do not have any contact with U.S. passport offices if you can possibly avoid it. 2. Don't expect planes to be on time. Don't expect your checked luggage to arrive with you. London theatre tickets purchased online are transferable. 3. Learn to sit for more than 2 minutes at a time. Your feet will thank you. 4. Don't eat gelato more than twice a day, after that it's not quite as good. Corollary - don't eat gelato in Rome, it's not great and there are other things that have just as many calories and taste better. 4. Pack a couple of days before your flight. That way, if you suddenly find out that your flight halfway around the world is leaving 24 hours sooner that you remembered, you won't miss it. 5. If you are going to the Netherlands in July, be sure you pack winter gloves, hat and scarf. 6. Don't drop your camera more than 2 or at most 3 times. It will retaliate. Never drop your camera on a 2000-year-old Roman road. After surviving that long, the road always wins. 7. Know before you go. The more research you do before the trip, the better prepared you'll be and the more you'll see and do. 8. As you leave your hotel, put one of their business cards in your pocket, just in case. Corollary: don't go anywhere without a map. 7. Relax. You can't see everything, so don't try. Enjoy the moments. Talk to people, tourists and locals. Take lots of photos. 10 years from now, you'll see that picture of yourself with Joyce and Jon from Timbuktu in a random encounter in Fiesole or Giverny or Delft and a flood of wonderful memories will billow forth.

If someone tells you that it is too dangerous for a single woman to be in Saint Petersburg by herself, don't believe them. I imagine the same is true for a lot of other places. Most people give advise based on their fears and abilities. You may have very different skills and concerns. Do take into account other people's actual experiences.

One simple lesson, BE PREPARED!!
As everyone else has detailed, curveballs happen. The more prepared I am with details in the guidebook the easier it is to adjust on the fly. I always do my homework and know what my options are. That way the only curveballs are the ones out of your control (i.e. strike) and not self inflicted ones because you did not plan properly.

4. Don't eat gelato more than twice a day, after that it's not quite as good. Corollary - don't eat gelato in Rome, it's not great and there are other things that have just as many calories and taste better. You lost me at don't eat gelato.....

Before ordering dinner from the chalk-written blackboard, confirm that the prices listed are actually for dinner ... not lunch. That was an expensive little lesson!

My list, in no particular order 1. Whenever possible, schedule flights with long enough connection layovers. 4h-stay in an airport terminal if flight is on time beats the headaches of being reschedule/rerouted if a tight 90min connection is missed because of delays. 2. If you rent a car and is unfamiliar with its operation, drive around a bit on the lot of on a quiet street. Be attentive of auto-stop features and make sure you know how to operate the tank fuel lid/door before heading into a fuel station. 3. The best GPS is the one you operate, at home, and is familiar with. 4. If TripAdvisor has repeated specific complaints (noise, something broken/missing), it is likely true, and you will be disappointed. 5. Always carry some coins for using restroom, you never know when you will need it and the only one available requires coins. 6. When organizing a trip with someone other than a girlfriend or close relative you know well, make sure not to put yourself in a position of becoming "accountable" if something doesn't go as planned like bad weather, delayed train etc. It pays off not to over-entice people to travel with you if they are not involved with planning the trip themselves.

All hard learned lessons: The little colored dot on the gas cap cover of your rental car is the color of the fuel pump handle you want to use. Green is not diesel in Europe like it is in the U.S. Don't use two modes of transportation in one day if you can avoid it. For example a train and rental car. Don't plan on more than two train connections in one day. France and Italy are two different countries for a reason. Even though they seem close on a map they are not easy to travel between with ground transportation. Better to fly. Don't leave with a full suitcase. If you are you have packed to much. Plan on a laundry day after a week or so. Don't go to a restaurant because you are tired and "there are plenty of people there so it must be OK". Take the time to plan your meals around RS recommended places (or several other guide books because they all overlap. The train to "Gare de Lyon" from Avignon is NOT the train to Lyon even though you are on the right track that four separate employees said was correct but the change of tracks was in French and you didn't know it. That was a fun day! The prompts on your cell phone to retrieve messages or add time or anything else are in a foreign language and useless. Get a British sim and pay the roaming charge.

When you book connecting flights, book them on the same itinerary. This way, if you miss a connection (and it will happen) the airline is way more accommodating and in some cases may automatically rebook you on a later flight. On one of my first trips, I booked different legs of a flight through different ways to save money(one leg using miles, one leg on travelocity, etc). My first leg of the trip was delayed and I missed my connecting flight. When I didn't arrive for my connecting flight (because I was still in the air for my first flight), it got cancelled. So I arrived in a foreign country and had to pay an arm and a leg to buy a ticket for a new flight. My flight home for that leg of the trip had also been cancelled. And I had to buy THAT flight too. Now I just book one airline, one itinerary. Costs a little more up front but it is so worth it. I also never fly though Heathrow without allowing 4 hours for a layover.

1) The map is not the territory. 2) Just spend the goddam euros to see the stuff you want to see. Don't waste time stressing out about it. That's what they (the goddam euros) are for. 3) If you fall into a bad attitude somehow (Was it closed? Did it rain? Were you late? Was it a rip-off? Whatever), it happens to everyone. Treat yourself to a decent meal and move forward. 4) If you are in a place that has a tower or steeple or other high place, climb it.

Bad things happen (transportation strikes, record-breaking weather, etc.) so vent, evaluate options and move on.

1. If you aren't traveling carry-on only, make sure that you carry a change of clothes, clothes that are comfy enough to sleep in, and a few basic toiletries in your carry-on in case your luggage takes a day or two to catch up to you. Yes, you can buy stuff there, but it's nice to not have to spend your first day there shopping for clothes. I was super thankful I had some clothes in my carry-on when my luggage got stuck in Frankfurt and didn't catch up to me for a day. Goes without saying, pack any medicines/valuables/essentials for your trip in your carry-on. 2. I'm with others in allowing 90+ minutes for connections, preferably 2+ hours if you have to clear customs and/or it's a large airport. See luggage left in Frankfurt above. 3. Try for flights earlier in the day. They're often less likely to be running late and there might be later flights they can bump you to if you miss a connection, instead of having to stay over a night and catch a flight the next day. 4. Agreed on the money gun. Always have enough resources available to you to buy an emergency ticket home or to change hotels or something if it becomes necessary.

1. If you're driving (and maybe even if you're not), bring a GPS from home, that has current maps, and that you know how to use. 2. Bring a paper map, too. Your GPS may die (or be stolen), you may lose your map. Do not rely on having just one or the other, you're gonna want both.
3. Bring a small compass. Yes, a compass. A tiny, cheap one is fine. You're not bushwhacking across Australia, but being able to check which way is (roughly) north (by taking a furtive glance as you're walking) can be invaluable in finding your way around an unfamiliar city on foot and staying oriented. Useful even in big, "modern" cities (London, Paris) but worth its weight in gold when plunging into the twisty little streets of a medieval old-city (the medinas of Marrakech and Fes, to name a couple). 4. Always bring at least two cards of any type (ATM/credit cards). ATM systems and credit card readers can be finicky; sometimes my card/account won't wrk, but the wife's does. The list goes on...

Chani, great post except for the gelato in Rome comment - next time go to Giolitti. Hard lesson: I had six train connections in one day. The first train was ten minutes late. The second was an hour late, and I lost a day. I was gas-bombed by the Paris police while they were chasing a group of thieves. Very uncomfortable for a minute, great story for years to come.

But do read the negative reviews on TripAdvisor to make sure they aren't all complaining about things that are irrelevant to you. (For instance, no lift, no air-conditioning, no free car parking, no cooked breakfast available...)

Amen Christine - on the Paris McD's washroom - lol - I did the exact same thing - was it the Champs Elysee one? I don't care if I went an hour ago - if there is a free bathroom, I'm using it - hubby always shakes his head - but one of these days, he'll pay...teehee Oh...and Zoe - we were going from Genoa to Bologna, with a change in Milan - we had a tight change...of course, the train arrived with only a few min to spare - we couldn't find the train on the big board (look for final destination city!), missed train (it was pulling out as we were running)...had to wait an hour - had gone into the trenitalia office to fix ticket, the lovely (said sarcastically) woman then wrote down the wrong train on the ticket - hour later, got on the right train, showed ticket to conductor, he's says no - you want the other train, changed trains...which was indeed the wrong train - ended up in Verona...missed our connection there (our train was late - quell surprise!), another hour wait...that day was a comedy of errors, our first 'big' trip, like day 6 I think - what an experience...

No, it was at the bottom of Montmartre, I think. Probably on the Boulevard Rochechouart. I recall it was on the corner of a main drag and had a lot of discount stores around it. There was some lovely street food across the street, I forget what, but we definitely ate that instead!

Lessons learned the hard way that come to mind: 1. Pack light 2. Keep your bag organized 3. Keep your valuables secure 4. Don't plan everything to the minute.
5. Don't sweat it when your plan doesn't work out. I like Ed's comment about seeing the stuff you want to see and not relying on other's recommendations. My standards, however, have lowered somewhat over time. I'm more likely to see something that's a marginal sight for me these days - primarily because I've come all this way, I might as well visit it now. I still won't waste time on a sight I know I don't want to see.

Thanks for the warnings about trip planning for family members. Not that I could afford it, but I have found myself lately wishing I could take my daughters and their families along on a trip. Not such a good idea, after all; we might never speak to each other again! I will mention one other hard-learned lesson: Take Helpline advice, even this, with a grain of salt, and add an extra tablespoon for advice from TripAdvisor "experts." Every mistake I cited above came after getting reassurances on these boards that there was nothing to worry about. At least, the Helpline folks were writing from experience; I am not so sure about some of the TA "experts." Just because something always works for others, does not mean it will work for you; just because they never had a problem does not mean you won't. There's always the law of averages. Seek advice but, in the end, trust your gut. Going off on a tangent, one thing that seems to be missing in these comments: For all the talk on Helpline about moneybelts, there has been no mention of them; no one so far seems to have had a problem with pickpockets. I haven't, but I now use a hidden pocket to keep from losing passport and credit cards. Maybe my luck will hold.

Junk: reservations and money belts. I've spent more than half my life (right at three quarters in the last dozen years) outside of the United States and have seldom found a need for the former and never for the latter. The law of averages be damned.

Roy, I thought everyone used money belts. To me, it's like saying "wear shoes in Italy." Zoe, I'm sure there must be some good gelati in Rome, but after I found the canoli in Trastevere, even the best wouldn't have tempted me. Next trip, I'm finding a room in Trastevere!! I think the shop also had gelati, but I only had eyes for the canoli.

Okay Roy, here you go - Keep your valuables secure. Using a money belt or similar is up to you, but be aware that in very crowded situations (metro, buses or any other crowd) it's easy to be picked and you won't even know it. Fortunately when this happened to me it was on the way to the airport to go home. I was able to recover the money spent using my debit card, but running to the bank, DMV, etc. was not what I had planned for my first day home. And if it had happened earlier in the trip or my passport had been in my wallet, big problem! Use what kind of bag you prefer. Wheels or no wheels is a personal preference. But do make sure you pack lightly. Your hotel may have an elevator, but it might be broken. Don't count on help getting up those steep stairs to the train. Have an idea about what you want to see, but don't plan your day down to the minute. Stuff happens. Don't be disappointed if you don't get to something. Just plan on going back another time if it's that important to you. Take time to enjoy the place you are visiting. Don't just rush from site to site so you can check things off your list. Your trip will end up being a big blur. Choose your travel companions wisely. If planning for anyone that's not a spouse or minor child make sure they approve of the destinations and lodging choices prior to booking. Then if they are unhappy with the result they can be reminded that they signed off on it and the blame shouldn't go to you. Be prepared, but expect the unexpected. When things don't go as planned it usually makes for the best stories later! Always have change for the bathroom. When you see one, use it. Take grocery bags to the store with you. I always pack a couple of bags that crumple up very small and put them in my purse.

Always have change for the bathroom. My wife didn't believe me on her first trip abroad. She learned fast. That is now at the top of her list.

Are you ever right about #1! My first trip to Europe had a connecting flight out of CDG and I don't know if I've ever been as upset and confused as I was when I was set loose in an enormous mass of people who seemed not only equally confused but all speaking in foreign languages. No discernible lines, no sense of where to go and my connecting flight leaving in 10 minutes. I grabbed an airline employee and magically they whisked me to the right security line and somehow got me through and had the plane wait as I ran, shoe-less and sweaty, through the terminal. Never again.

Roy, I think it would be possible for you to plan a trip to Europe for a very small group of family. What I was talking about on page one was a trip I had tried to plan for a large group of friends that I had known since college. Think "The Big Chill" with twice as many people. The bickering started immediately; the first meeting we all had to talk about an itinerary. That's a bad sign! I think if it were you and 3 other close family members that wanted to go, it would work. Let's say, if you have two adult daughters, and their husbands didn't want to go. That might work; you, your wife and two daughters. When the group grows large, that's when people start having a difference of opinion. It might work, as you say, to include all members of the daughters' families. You could test the waters by getting together with the family members you are thinking of taking on the trip, have a general discussion, and see if any arguments start developing. It's a good sign if everyone gets along well in the first place. You said, "Not that I could afford it, but I have found myself lately wishing I could take my daughters and their families along on a trip." It is more than generous to offer to pay only a portion of the kids' trip. There is no need to break the retirement savings account; that is our thinking. Our kids can pay their portion of the trip, say, their airfare and food, if we pay for just hotels. We were going to take our grandchildren to England with us one summer, but they just weren't interested. They decided they'd rather stay at home with their friends. So don't be surprised if your family trip turns out to be adults only. Some kids are involved in Little League or swimming competitions in the summer, and want to stay home.

1. Skip CDG for connecting flights; if no better option, either set a three-hour minimum or, best option, spend the night in Paris and take a train out the next day. (Same to a lesser degree with some other large airports.) /quote] thats a no brainer. after my trip to london late last year, i always try to book the connecting flight at the minumum 3 hours after my flight arrives. also, after my last trip, i am staying in AMS on my way in and out. I dont want to do it since i loose about a days worth of sight seeing, but its cheaper than not. 2. If you must book a car (or train) for the day of arrival, build in extra time in case of late arrivals, missed connections, etc. Preferably spend the night in the city and pick up the car the next morning. /quote] when i booked my trains last year, alot of it was "unknown" and i didnt use this site. so i always booked with 2+ hours "layover".
3. Don't travel to Europe, except for, maybe, the north, in July or August; if you have no choice, see item 4./quote] i try to travel in spring or fall. so far. i believe when i head down south, i will have to change my travel months. no biggie. every trip is a adventure and learning experience! happy trails.

1) ditto the "go when you can, not when you have to" rule for bathrooms. Everyone should take small packs of kleenex for the inevitable times there is no paper or they want to charge you for each square (really, this happened in a small town in Italy) 2) Despite an immense amount of teasing by friends, family, and tour mates, I have never, ever regretted bringing a small roll of duct tape, spare watch and alarm clock batteries, and a small screwdriver (intended for fixing eyeglasses).

Amongst the many good reasons to use a money belt, money belts are your key to peace of mind. And, No, I don't sell money belts.

So what does one do when you don't have money to throw out at a problem? That's when real problem-solving skills come in. My biggest "learned the hard way" advice is not useful for most travelers - almost every travel problem I used to have has been solved by having a smart phone with data in Europe. But that's not realistic for most people. It is, however, a lifesaver.

When planing everything online or over the phone from the U.S. changing things while in a foreign country without fast Internet access can be a big challenge. When you only get to go to Europe once every year or two things like hotel reservations so you can rest assured that you have a nice place to stay is a big deal. When you are Ed and you travel so often that you don't care then you have a different perspective. When loosing your valuables on your very limited travel time is a big deal the added peace of mind of a money belt is cheap insurance. When you are multilingual and not frequenting major tourist attractions like Ed than the perspective of using a money belt is quite different.

1) If traveling separately to Europe, everyone should know where the hotel is. In the "you can't make this up" category, on my first trip to Europe I was going to meet a friend in the Rome airport. He had made the hotel reservations, and we agreed on a meeting spot in the airport. With his flight arriving only 45 minutes after mine, seemed fine to me. Except he missed the flight! Hilarity ensued... 2) If you need to connect on your flight from the US, try to connect on the Continent. If your plane takes off at all, when you land you are in Europe and if worst comes to worst can take trains. Also there are many more flights within Europe in case you are delayed and miss your scheduled flight than their are flights over the Atlantic. 3-4 hour delays in takeoff happen more than you think. 3) Use a moneybelt. People basing a decision on how rare pickpocketing is (and I'm not so sure of that) are missing half the calculation. Rarity is not the only factor, the other is consequence. I've never seen a sport parachutist jump without using a reserve, even though parachutes almost always open normally. 4) Each change of location takes about 1/2 the day, even if its only 1 hour away by transportation. By the time you have breakfast and check out, get the car or to the train, travel, find the new hotel, check in -- its probably lunch time or later.

1) Always try the local beer. 2) Be Flexible. Rarely does everything go as planned. 3) If something doesn't go as planned, don't get mad, get creative. 4) If you travel in the height of tourist season, expect crowds. Plan your time accordingly. (In March, on a weekday, I counted 81 tour buses around Notre Dame. Can you imagine what it's would be like in July?) 5)Slow down. Rushing to see everything means you really don't see anything. 6) Every now and then, plan a down day for a little R & R. 7) If you don't like beer, try the local wine.