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"I can't believe you're going now"

Has anyone had this type of reaction from people when you mention possibly traveling internationally soon? "Now" meaning covid, and I suppose Ukraine. Does it make you stop and second guess yourself?

Posted by
490 posts

Had that reaction ever since I first started travelling in the 1980s. Last time it happened ? solo trip to Sichuan, China in October 2019.

Whatever - go, don't go, its nothing to do with other people's opinions.

Posted by
1473 posts

Yes, I have gotten that reaction. Even before COVID when traveling to Turkey.

No, no second guessing.

Posted by
3874 posts

I can't believe you're NOT going now, Europe needs American tourism more than ever, think of it as an investment in the European defense fund.

Posted by
14482 posts

Two relatives are flying out on Friday SFO (non-stop ) to Paris on a relatively short trip only to France. No time for anywhere else.

My question is: why would such a question be raised now? If so, so what? They got their shots and the booster too with no issues wearing the needed masks.

Posted by
352 posts

I have had a variation of this question for many years after I started my solo travels
" can't believe that you are traveling by yourself " or "you are so brave"
and "you mean your husband lets you go?" Which is offensive to him....
And sadly from a female friend "I would love to go but my husband won't let me"

Posted by
2380 posts

@Aimee - I love your comeback. I’ll have to remember that one.

Posted by
4023 posts

Most of my friends are already travelling or have plans. Of those that haven't made the decision yet, it's more of a curiosity question to gather their own information as they psyche themselves up to also take the leap.

Posted by
1570 posts

In 2017 we spent the month of September and the early part of October in France and Spain. We hosted our daughter's baby shower at our house about a week before we were due to leave. Several weeks previous there was the terrorist attack in Barcelona. A guest/friend at the shower told me she couldn't believe we were going to Spain because of the terrorist attack. She said there are "snakes" in Spain. We live less than an hour from Boston. I reminded her about the Marathon bombing in 2013 in Boston. Does that mean we should never go to Boston any more? So there are "snakes" in the US, too. She commented that there are more "snakes" in Europe.

We had a wonderful time in both France and Spain. And obviously we weren't killed. When we were in Seville, we learned about the mass shooting at the concert in Las Vegas. So, where were we safer? Seville or the concert in Las Vegas?

I don't listen to people who tell me not to go somewhere, never have, never will. Use your own best judgement. Don't let other people's fears scare you and dictate your life.

Posted by
2942 posts

It depends. It would be reasonable to be hesitant to travel now to Poland, Moldova, Lithuania, Latvia, and Estonia.

Personally, I wouldn't travel to China due to genocide. I mean, that's a clear red line for me.

What perplexes me is people who do not travel, or go to the same place every year, year after year. I'd be bored to tears. (I'm not referring to people who can't travel for whatever reason.) It's mystifying to me.

As for COVID, I believe we need to learn to live with it like any other pathogen. I have no problem with masks inside, or an airplane, where you will likely catch whatever virus those nearby might have.

Posted by
8377 posts

Some people's just have to say something, and their default is always negative.

Posted by
2599 posts

"I can't believe it's been 2.5 years since I visited Europe". No second guessing here. I already feel I missed some small windows of opportunity last year as it is.

Posted by
3067 posts

Yes, some people think I'm mad to travel solo...though I nearly always meet friends for part or at least two thirds of a trip.
They think I'm "brave'.
No....just curious about the world beyond my back yard!
I went to Paris two months after the terrible bombings of 2015, and felt very safe.
No one would come with me.
Their loss.....

Posted by
336 posts

"Fortune Favors the Bold". I've said before in the forum, unless I am actually forbidden to travel, I will travel.

Posted by
4256 posts

No one has asked us that-yet. I would be tempted to answer that I want to be in Europe if/when Putin decides to nuke the U.S. I bet that would shut them up.

Posted by
2942 posts

It's all about one's risk-reward criteria. At the extreme you have Americans volunteering to fight in Ukraine. On the other side is someone hiking alone with a mask and nobody is nearby.

Posted by
3948 posts

Yes, some people think I'm mad to travel solo…
They think I'm "brave'.
No....just curious about the world beyond my back yard!

LOL, SJ - this! And sometimes from surprising friends who DO travel independently - just not solo. I also tell them I am opinionated and want to go wherever I want to go ….. ha!

Posted by
15 posts

I travel sometimes solo to countries in Europe and Japan. And some of my friends say, you’re so brave and look at me as if I am tracking to the wilds of the Amazon or the waste land of the frigid Arctic. . But no I’m just traveling to a cultured beautiful place with wonderful museums and art and music and usually excellent food and drinks and also sometimes even wine festivals.

Posted by
152 posts

I have a family member who always expresses great concern and fearfulness for my safety every time I travel outside the U.S. That's a lot of fear as I have traveled many, many time since I started in 1982 and not just to Europe. Every time I tell this individual I feel much safer in Europe than I do in the U.S. But the individual doesn't buy it. I don't second guess myself. No surprise this individual has absolutely no desire to travel anywhere outside the U.S. ever. I reply to this comment made every time I travel that if I die I will die doing something I love. There is no reply to that. I plan to travel to Europe again as soon as possible. Not sure when that will be due to caregiving responsibilities. But I'd leave tomorrow if I could. Covid would not stop me. I will say I would not travel to Ukraine right now, but I'd like to someday if I live long enough for it to be a safe place to travel.

Posted by
14482 posts

Most of my trips since the first one were solo trips, including the very first in 1971 at 21.

I most certainly never saw myself as such, ie , "brave" when going solo regardless of the trip's duration. "Bravery" has nothing to do with going solo. I am not "brave" in this regard.

Posted by
2898 posts

Last time this happened to me was from friends, family and even from myself! LOL We had a flight NYC to Munich 4 weeks after 9/11/2001. Went and had a nice time.

Posted by
2111 posts

I have not traveled in over three years...we purposely slowed our travels when we adopted our dog as a puppy four years ago today....but, I have also not discouraged others from traveling. It is an individual choice to travel, as long as one is following safety advisories and doing their homework re: traveling in current times.

I have read some posts where individuals will mention: "We have (or will buy) travel insurance."

Even though I would always suggest (even in the best of times) one understand their travel insurance policy...what is included and what is not included....I seriously offer the advice to read carefully the language about any exclusions due to "acts of war" or "civil unrest." Obviously in these times, it could be a POSSIBLE concern. Hear me out on this:

1) Could a cyber attack on an airline's or multiple airlines' system(s) be considered "an act of war" if it were lobbed as an attack from a certain nation identified for specific retaliation? ASK!
2) Ditto for a power grid shutdown somewhere in the US or a country to which you are traveling? ASK!
3) Ditto again for a cyber attack on the financial system (or select parts thereof)? Granted,this might not interrupt your travel, but might cause issues with accessing cash/use of credit/debit cards, etc.
4) What if you are unexpectedly delayed returning home? Someone lined up to check your mail/water your plants/feed the dog longer/check on your house (eww....the freezer) if the power is out for a period of time?

If the POTUS has met with and urged corporate/governmental leaders to be seriously on guard for cyber attacks and to take whatever precautions possible because such attacks could be "consequential," it MIGHT be worth checking with your trip insurance carrier (before you purchase trip insurance) and definitely if you have already purchased such, just to understand any exclusions.

Should you not move forward with overseas travel? I think you should evaluate your own risk tolerance. Uncertainties are uncertainties, and if we all allowed every single uncertainty to rule our lives....well, we would do very little in life.

Just understand WHAT would be covered and what would NOT be covered should something truly unplanned happen before or during your travels.

It has not been uncommon to read people advise to "just use the ATM" to get local currency upon arrival, etc. Okay, what if the ATM network were suddenly shut down for a few days due to a cyber attack? Ditto for your credit card? What if your phone network did not function for a short period of time? We saw an airline system issue or two in previous years...it was not pretty, and I do not recall really hearing what the "cause" was of those issues. But a deeper, purposeful cyber attack might take a bit to unwind....or not...who knows? Our country has some really good cyber people, and I am sure they are in overdrive right now.

Uncertain times MIGHT require a back-up plan .... if you find yourself in a position that you could not count on Plan A, what is your Plan B to pivot?

Better to invest an hour or so to double check the "what ifs" with your trip insurance than to have to post on this Forum later saying how shocked, disappointed, whatever, that your trip insurance policy did not cover you.....or that you were in such and such place and the ATM network was down or your credit card would not process and you had no money for breakfast...or you just woke up the morning of your flight and the power was out (but the electronics that normally inform you....well....they were not working.) You get it!

Let's hope/pray none of this happens. But, good planning always includes some contingencies........not only in travel, but while staying home, too.

Be safe! Let there (please) be peace in the world and in each of your hearts/minds/travels. But, remember the Boy Scout motto.

Posted by
2380 posts

@Maggie The following is per Rick Steves -

US dollars: I carry $100–200 as a backup. While you won't use it for day-to-day purchases, American cash in your money belt comes in handy for emergencies, such as when banks go on strike or your ATM card stops working. I've been in Greece and Ireland when every bank went on strike, shutting down without warning. But hard cash is hard cash. People always know roughly what a dollar is worth.

I plan on carrying a bit more. I also know that trip insurance is only going to cover some things and not others and it will be my responsibility to handle the rest. We flew a month after 9/11 and people thought we were crazy. Whatever happens we will deal with it as it comes.

Posted by
343 posts

I've pretty much just stopped telling people. My husband and I went away last summer to Spain and Portugal and his mother was so worried that it was hard to be around her. We were fine.

A girlfriend from middle school and I are going to Ireland for 10 days in April and I haven't even said anything yet to my family (well, of course, my husband knows). It's just so much easier not to listen to their worries.

Posted by
2291 posts

I've pretty much just stopped telling people.

This is probably it in a nutshell. I think I'll do the same, minus one specific friend who also loves travel.

Posted by
201 posts

I've always felt safer in Europe than in the US, much to the dismay of my provincial family. Fewer guns, stricter Covid protocols, etc. And, in interviews the greatest regret that octogenarians and older repeatedly state is that they didn't take more risks.

Posted by
104 posts

Traveling to Poland in May with Rick's tour. So many people have questioned my going now that so many Ukranian refugees are crossing the border into Poland. They seem dismayed that I still want to go. They think the trip will be cancelled. I wish I had never told them.

Posted by
2291 posts

I've always felt safer in Europe than in the US

Me too. My American husband is slowly starting to understand this as well.

Posted by
17639 posts

This is one I dont want to dive into, but from a purely travel point of view I would advise against any newbee from thinking "I am in Europe (anyplace in Europe, All of Europe), therefore I am safer than in my upper middle class suburb in the states". It will just get you into a situation you might regret. When ever you read "Europe is" giving the impressions that "all of Europe is" stop reading. Its like saying "all of America is" and you know your neighborhood isn't the same as the neighborhood on the east side of town. Do you research and plan a safe trip.

Posted by
201 posts

James E., you are right. Feeling safe in Europe is dependent on where one is traveling. We don't travel into war zones or places that are in the news every night. I do believe the average American planning a trip to Western Europe--and I emphasize 'planning' in the sense of doing research--can do a lot to guarantee that they will be as safe, or safer than, they are at home. Knowledge is power and gives a lot of control over the unexpected.

Posted by
14482 posts

Naturally, it depends on where you go in Europe, obviously, not into war zone or somewhere hazardous. One would not be going out to les Banlieues in major French cities..

Going to "normal" places, tourist and non-tourist makes up the itinerary. Most of my visited, explored places in Germany were non-tourist, based on the people I saw around me , ie, locals in towns and cities where no US or international tourist go to, such as Magdeburg, Duisburg, Wesel am Rhein, Hamm, Pinneberg bei Hamburg, Minden, Eutin,/Holstein, Krefeld, Butzbach, Leipzig, Weimar, Meissen, Halle, Jena, Dortmund, and so on., including the eastern Berlin suburbs. Of course, I went around, walked around by day.

Just by the odds, perceived or real, I know getting jumped or jacked in the streets , in subway stations, wherever "American style '" are far, far less likely to happen than walking around in American cities where I have, as in Germany and particularly in France, tourist written all over me.

That phrase, "I feel safer in Europe than I do normally in US cities" is, under the same circumstances, applies to me. It is a valid assertion.

Posted by
17639 posts

Susan, I come across at times a bit sarcastic. Not my intent. My apologies. Just not a great communicator.

I have an issue with over generalizations, and so I always push back on them. Especially here, where we have newbees that post questions like “I’m going to X, what should I do” which sort of implies that they don’t have a clue and maybe if we aren’t a bit more precise, we could really mess someone up.

My US Benchmark is the community in the US that I live in where I can walk to the 0-24 Market at 2 am, alone and safe and I can leave my doors unlocked all night. That is my life reality. I can do the same in my home in Budapest but only because of the neighborhood I live in. Ehhhhh, probably not a good idea to leave the door unlocked. Heck there is a wonderful part of Budapest where I go to religious services where I wouldn’t walk alone at night.

Now, you have said Western Europe. Okay, there are suburbs of Paris I wouldn’t walk alone at night to name one example of many, and there are major tourist cities in Western Europe that are notorious for pick pockets and assorted street crime; all below my benchmark standard in terms of safety (but I still go, knowing the odds). So, I don’t want to give the impression if you aren’t going to a country at war you are “safer”.

Then maybe one might be concerned with potential issues. If one’s threshold is low for that, stay out of Bosnia & Herzegovina. The problem is the US news does a lousy job of reporting on the world. I suspect the invasion in Ukraine was a total surprise to half the US population while the rest of the world has been waiting since 2014.

For COVID, many countries have responded like Blue States, many have responded like Red States. So “Europe” hasn’t done a better job than the US, but certain countries one may assess have.

I always emphasize that Europe isn’t a place, it is a collection of places, each unique and that’s what make the travel so spectacular.

But you are completely accurate that the overall, the crime statistics in Europe on average are better than the crime statistics of the United States on average. We just don’t live in or travel to the Average.

However, “on the trips that I have planed to Paris, London and Rome; I have felt safer than I do in my own home town” is a very valid statement.

I just never want to see a post that says “You guys told me Europe was safer than the US, and I got carjacked and robbed in Lazarat” LOL

Posted by
201 posts

It's OK, James. I am guilty of both sarcasm and over-generalization.
In our midwestern city there are 2-3 shootings every night. We don't go out after dark. Yet in Naples, identified as one of the most crime-ridden cities in the world, we are perfectly comfortable going for ice cream after sunset. We don't frequent the dicier areas of the city, but we know where those are because we have done our research. In my thinking, one of the most important travel skills that RS has identified is doing the necessary work before the trip so that there are no/few surprises on the trip. That also enables an intelligent response to questions about traveling in these times.

Posted by
17639 posts

Susan D, I have you beat on the sarcasm. But I can overly generalize too; Budapest is the most beautiful city in Europe. I am reminded of this as I look out the wine bar window.

Posted by
96 posts

Susan --i am with you. I live in a big city with multiple murders every day! That's how our news starts --"breaking news" and then discusses shootings and murders every day!
I feel much better in all the European cities I have visited and I travel solo most of the time. I NEVER go out at night here, but I do in Europe--and I take Rick's advise--no jewelry or easy to grab purses etc. I can't wait to go back in June.

Posted by
2291 posts

My husband was talking to his brother last night and told him of our upcoming travel plans for later this year (Belgium, The Netherlands, and Italy), and he responded with "What?! Aren't you scared?" My husband replied "Of what?" and his brother didn't know what to say. It was kind of funny.

Posted by
1936 posts

Covid yes. Cases are rising and I've postponed until next year.

Ukraine war-no. Other than refugees in Germany and Austria, it's really not a danger. But then I've gone to Turkey, traveled to London a month after 9/11 and the 7/7 Tube attacks and gone to Madrid when they had the strikes.

Everyone has different tolerance levels. No answer is right or wrong.