Does gender matter?

I never thought about it much, but if I had to make a guess I would say that the gender ratio of folks here I have helped has been pretty close to evenly split.

Your theories might have some merit. On the other hand, I think stereotypes would suggest female planners would be more likely to enlist a travel agent (asking for help) while male planners would be the do-it-yourself types that would consider anything done on the internet for free (like this) counts as do-it-yourself.

But then that's just my off-the-cuff guess at a stereotype, so I could be wrong.

Another reason might be in the different ways most women and men use the internet. Speaking in general terms, men are more likely to use the internet for straight forward information while women are more interested in the internet as a communication tool. Thus, women frequent discussion boards more than men do.

My husband certainly checks out websites to book flights or hotels, select travel guides at amazon ... but would not dream of asking a question in a forum like this one. Since my job is currently very part-time I simply have more time on my hands to do the majority (not all!) of most trip planning tasks.

The can of worms?? It is the first warm night in Denver since last Fall and I am not sure Lee can not handle the heat. I have no idea but I will start counting.

I have no opinion, but oh boy, I can't wait to see where this one goes, seeing how the post concerning talking about travel has degenerated into quite a flame-war... and if it doesn't, I'll try to stir the pot a little. I love how the one little snipe I inserted about Vegas has torn that one open!

If I had to pick one, I'd go with your theory #1. That was always the case in my house when I was married, though it had nothing to do with his thinking his job was too important to be bothered with trip planning - he just didn't want to do it.

Hmm, I think I will take what is behind door # 2.

What are directions?

And the number of posts does not mean long time here....there are such things as "chronic posters."

I think its funny that we all think we know a persons sex from their screen name. I have posted over on TA( another forum) for many years,, and only a few days ago realized one of the regular posters is not the gender I thought they were.... too funny really.

I have also had my gender mistaken ,, here, several times.

As for your point # 1 Lee,, you don't really think that do you, LOL I mean,, even cave women work nowadays ,, and guess what,, they can make as much or more then their hubbies. Then too , there are the freaks like me who plan the trips cause they pay for them, and they take them alone sometimes. There is a whole world of women solo travellers out there,, not on this RS board,, but on others, and many of us ARE married.. Some women quilt ,, some travel, its a hobby . LOL

. I think your point number 2 may have more value,,

Beatrix "Another reason might be in the different ways most women and men use the internet. Speaking in general terms, men are more likely to use the internet for straight forward information while women are more interested in the internet as a communication tool. Thus, women frequent discussion boards more than men do."

I am in complete agreement with you. My husband likes to travel as much as I do, but he goes about it a different way. Very straight forward as you said above. So he is responsible for finding directions from one to place to another, figuring out when sites are open, booking hotels and plane reservations, etc. While I work the itinerary and ask each person in the family what they would like to see or do and then work it in to the itinerary logistically. I am the one asking questions on the website as I consider someone's personal experience worth it's weight in gold.

Lee - If I HAD to choose between #1 or #2, I'd pick #2. Good question, and I too am looking forward to some interesting posts!

Okay, I admit I took the 5 mins to make a rough count of posts by gender, those asking questions (OP's) versus those answering questions: Based on the posts from May 19, about 30% of the original posters, i.e., those asking questions, were men; and about 40% of those answering questions were men.

Note: This was based on the last 24 hours or so, which may not be representative, since one frequent poster (who happens to be male) is hors de combat since he's in Paris and his frequency of posting has been slowed down somewhat (we love ya, Steve, you're on vacation, big guy, just keep drinking wine). What I'm saying is, in a typical day in the last 6 months, before today, I'm guessing that the % of men answering questions would have been somewhat higher than the 40% observed in the last 24 hours.

I'll read with interest the theories proposed here by others to explain this--but I thought some empirical data might be useful (I know, don't confuse me with the facts).

Jumping into the worm can....

My husband mostly just doesn't want to be bothered with planning the trips. I don't think it has anything to do with how important he feels his employment is -- it was the same when I was making more than him than when I was making less -- it's just not something he wants to do. He'd be happy with just jumping on a plane and doing everything on the fly, not doing any research at all. Heck, if it wasn't for the fact that he works for the airline and has to get the tickets for us, he wouldn't even do that.

We took a trip around Florida years ago with my brother-in-law and his brothers. We barely had plans, no reservations. Every day the brothers would fight over where we would go, where we were going to stay, plans would change several times daily. My sister and I are planners, we thought it was the worst vacation ever. The guys were perfectly fine and thought everything was great.

Ever seen the Mr. Wonderful doll? That's the action figure of me. ;)

For those who have never heard of Mr. Wonderful, it's a stuffed doll that looks like a little man in business casual dress. He has a button inside his hand that prompts him to make statements - among them "I think I'm lost. Let's pull over and ask directions." (Others include "Let's just cuddle tonight" and "You're going shopping? Mind if I tag along and carry your bags?" LOL!)

I love travel and (probably because I'm cheap) want to make sure I get the most out of every trip - so I plan a lot. When I'm on the road, I might appear to be super spontaneous, but that's only because I've studied all my options for transport and sites carefully.

My wife likes to travel and generally lets me do the planning although I bounce ideas off her regularly.

My household fits neither theory. Both my husband and I work full-time. However, I plan everything for a trip except he picks what kind of places he wants to eat. I think this happens because he didn't travel much as a child and would be comptely overwhelmed with everything that went into it. I did travel a lot and knew the kinds of things you had to do to get ready. Either way, I plan every trip and try to keep his interests in mind. They generally turn out successful in his mind too.

I guess we fit more into the #1 theory. By the way,I'm a female Terry and have been thought to be male several times too (on this board..thankfully never in person!) My husband has a job and I don't, so I have endless hours to do whatever I want in life and travel happens to be my hobby. I do all the advance planning and research, occasionally asking him for input on his interests. But when we arrive at our destination, he has to take charge more, implementing my plans. I have no sense of direction so he actually finds the places, figures out the metros of each city, deals with foreign currency and is better at languages. He would never think of using a board like this one since he uses a computer at work all day and doesn't want to use it at home if he can avoid it. We have vastly different roles, but work extremely well as a travel team.

It would be interesting to compare answers provided here with answers provided to a similar question in another forum altogether. Generally speaking, I think you might find that the demographics of those who contribute to the Helpline are vastly different than those of, say, young backpackers in graduate school who travel the globe. I’m betting that gender probably plays a much less significant role with that group compared to this group with respect to who does the planning and why. Alot of Traditionalists & Baby Boomers here.

I'm the one who does most of the research and planning, because her job is more important than mine. When I have an itinerary that looks ok, I then bring it to She that must be obeyed for tweeking and final approval. This plan of attack has worked well for the past 23 years.

I am the female version of Brad ( except for the
the Mrs Wonderful part). I love planning
our trips, my husband actually says I spent to much
time on it, but he always loves our trips and gives
is input on our itinerary. He would never invest as much
time as I do, I guess the planning part of it just does not
interest him that much.

Wow -- I'm coming into this the day after, and no one has said anything offensive yet. Although perhaps Brad's wife would be offended to learn he thinks he's Mr. Wonderful. :)

In our house I'm the planner because that's just my personality. My older son, whose personality is similar to mine in many ways, is getting married next month and he's the one planning their honeymoon. That said, he's done a lot of research online, and I'm willing to bet he hasn't posted any questions on any forums.

As a VERY general rule, I think men don't like to ask for help (or perhaps they don't think they need it?), so I'm voting for #2.

I can only say so much, since my significant other simply hasn't traveled as much, but in my case I'm just an over-thinker, over-planner, and a worrier. I don't know that that is a mark of my sex, though. I get it from my father, but he, being of a different generation, probably would not automatically turn to forums such as these for advice, or at least would maintain a lurking status rather than asking questions.

I do think women tend to be more likely to use forums, though, but I have no real evidence to back that idea up. I believe it's more about how we expect women to be more chatty, while men are expected to simply research rather than ask. I simply prefer to include real human beings in my research process.

Maybe it is because Rick Steves brings all the ladies to the yard. Maybe more women watch the show compared to men. I am the planner of my household, so of course, I am going to do all the research and if I can't find what I want online, I am going to post my question on the RS forum. Before a trip, my boyfriend can't even get thru reading the RS book once, mostly because there are not enough pictures (he reads Umberto Eco books but can't quite get thru a RS book, weird huh?). In fact, when he does read it, it is on the way home on the plane, after our trip is over, maybe as a way to recap all that he has seen. So I guess, my vote is number 1. I don't think he would know what to do if I left it up to him to plan a vacation. If number 2 is the reason, could this lead us to the next question: are most ugly Americans men? Usually confusion(and not being well prepared for trips) will make people act out, talk loud, forget manners, forget pleasantries? When I research my trip, I almost want to feel like I have been there because I have planned intensely. And I do this so I am not an ugly American!

I completely disagree with Randy...."that most women would go to a travel agent".....wrong!! I always do all the planning..because it's fun and I enjoy it. I ask for my husbands imput while planning it. I enjoy contacting differenct hotels by phone, email etc., getting responses back, making notes of things we want to see and/or do....all fun.

:) I am the head of my household and female. If I were married I probably would not been able to travel internationally.

"Okay, I admit I took the 5 mins to make a rough count of posts by gender, those asking questions (OP's) versus those answering questions: Based on the posts from May 19, about 30% of the original posters, i.e., those asking questions, were men; and about 40% of those answering questions were men.
Note: This was based on the last 24 hours or so, which may not be representative, since one frequent poster (who happens to be male) is hors de combat since he's in Paris and his frequency of posting has been slowed down somewhat (we love ya, Steve, you're on vacation, big guy, just keep drinking wine). What I'm saying is, in a typical day in the last 6 months, before today, I'm guessing that the % of men answering questions would have been somewhat higher than the 40% observed in the last 24 hours."

This survey is invalid since it was taken during a weekday. Obviously men are working at important jobs which women don't work and have more opportunity to goof around on the internets.

Things must be slow on the Traveler's Helpline. Let's see if this topic beats "How others view us...," which is now at 113 posts.

I, too, disagree with Randy's suggestion that women sterotypically are more likely to use travel agents. I have traveled internationally both with family and alone, I have done all of the planning for said trips, and I have never, ever used a travel agent. Women can be just as much DIY travel planners as men.

Hey, Hey now...

I simply GUESSED that that might be the STEREOTYPE that women might be likely to enlist a travel agent. I did not say it was true. That's quite a stretch. Just for the record, NO, I don't think gender matters at all. I don't want to go into unnecessary detail, but in our household the STEREOTYPE gender roles are 100% reversed.

My wife claims to love to travel but would not read a guide book if her life depended on it, nor has she ever clicked on this web site though she knows I do. She is very good at her job, but in every other part of her life, "we should..." means I should.

And here I thought Randy was a female. . .

My wife and I like to travel but she doesn't like to do the planning. I do all of the planning and she happily tags along.

But I think there are more women posters because they are more concerned about things like what to wear, curling irons, flat irons, hair dryers, etc.
Where as men tend to analyze the information that is already available online and in books versus asking for opinions.
My wife is that way. Instead of reading a guide book about Germany she'll just come here and post a bunch of questions about Germany.

Just different ways of getting to the same conclusion I think.

Unless some develops a survey with statistical validity we'll never know whether or not even the original supposition is true. I haven't posted responses for the last week or so because I've been on the road. I am sure that there are many other alternative for the appearance that women post more often than men. Pam

My vote is for 1.75. I do the planning since hubby is a "spontaneous" type and I don't function well that way! However, my father and son both plan trips so I think the "planning" part doesn't reflect gender. However, IMO the asking for help probably is easier for females for several reasons--some previously posted. But then again, I very seldom ask questions and tend to "lurk" and search for answers to my questions. Hmmmm, maybe my name should be gender-neutral.

Pam's post about a valid "study" is right on. "Our" very presence on this help line skews any validity. ;-)

I want to know if gender matters on how people judge you and your trips and what shoes I should wear in Europe so I don't look like a tourist.

Really good question, Lee. And good answers all round. My tuppence: My wife does most of the guidebook reading; I do focussed spot checking and cross checking. When RS goes where we are going I try to read between the lines and use one of his. Always, always, check it on TripAdvisor though. Use other guidebooks and TA when he doesn't.

I like to share (see that feminine side coming out?) and help folk, I like to be the tour guide in the group, and because I work in the British railway system I like to share that specialist knowledge.

Number 1 or number 2? Maybe 2; but I think we have all shown that it is deeper than that.

Yes, Tom, in that case gender matters. If you're wearing women's high heels, you will be judged. :)

Thanks Frank II- I got all the way through this very refined, very mild talk of gender roles and got to your post and cracked up!

I don't think it is gender, I think it is personality. Generally speaking, one spouse is more of a "nerd" (pays bills, is organized, etc) and one is more of a "free spirit". My free spirit husband couldn't imagine "planning" a trip like I would. His idea of planning would be to buy the airline tickets. He is always worried that I will have an hour to hour plan of our trip since I'm more of a planner and "nerd". But, it balances out. I plan and he keeps me open minded to change.

"If you're wearing women's high heels, you will be judged. :)"

And I thought people were looking at me funny because I was an American wearing shorts!

first, as my husband and i both have the exact same job--we're both english teachers--and we both have small part time jobs as well, i think it is fair to say that at least for us it is not number 1. but it is also not number 2 (though i like that theory), as my husband has done zero planning for this or any other trip we've done. he will say something like 'gee honey, i'd really like to _____', and then i race into the office to start researching how to make that possible (on two teachers salaries). so he does have input.

however, he takes care of the trip-related bills (and, actually, all other bills). not that he pays them with only his money--we make about the same amount of money and all is shared--but he literally pays them as they come in. i recently complained to him that 'you never do any of the planning--what would you do without me? like what if it was tuesday night and you were in paris--where would you go and how would you get there?' and he replied simply 'what is our current credit balance?'. check mate! so he's in charge of that part of the trip--the part i'd rather not deal with (though of course i have everything budgeted out--teacher salaries, remember!) it is kind of like how we deal with dinner--i plan meals and cook them (because i like doing that) and he cleans up the dishes. maybe we're mr. and mrs. wonderful?

I see this thread is still alive and that the statistical validity of my previous survey has been questioned. I agree that the prior survey was flawed: it was conducted on a day when our Helpline Special Paris Correspondent was out of action, or as they say in Paris, hors de combat. I've adjusted the prior results by adding 30 posts to the male side of things--this being a conservative estimate of the number of answers our Paris Correspondent would normally have posted in an average day, if his posting frequency had not been impaired, somewhat, due to his being on airplanes or otherwise impaired due to jet lag and/or sleeping in a different time zone.

When the prior survey results are adjusted, it turns out that 70% of those asking questions on the Helpline are women, but only 502% of those answering questions are women.

These results appear to prove, without question, the superiority of the female gender.

For the math-minded out there, have no fear: Frank II and Lee are, as we speak running correlation coefficients on the survey results [edit: Lee added after 1st sentence of Frank II's reply--see below]. Stay tuned.

What's a correlation coefficent?

Should I figure it out in advance or should I wait until I get to Europe?

If I figure it out in English, will I be considered a tourist?

Can I wear shorts while figuring it out?

Frank II: Wait until you get to Europe to run the correlation coefficients--it'll give you something to do over a romantic dinner with the wife.;)

And yes, you can run the stats while wearing shorts, as long as you don't do it while in an Italian church.

My husband and I both work full time, although he is home more days because he works 24 hour shifts. Neither job is more important than the other in terms of the effort it takes. I also pay the bills, shop for groceries and cook 99.9% of the meals, do most of the laundry and much of the yard work except mowing the lawns. I also take care of my disabled brother, his bills, grocery shopping and do what it takes for him to live independently. On the other hand, my hubby does a lot (but not all)of the house work and cleans up after I cook. I would say we are co-heads-of-household.

I do ALL the trip planning. He watches travel shows with me, but has no interest in planning besides occasionally mentioning a place he would like to go. At the beginning we talk about where to go, then I make it happen. I do all the research, make all the reservations, etc. I know ahead of time what each place has to offer, but I don't have a daily hour by hour schedule or anything like that. I do keep in
mind what may be closed to figure out if we need to do something on a particular day.

My guess is that most people on this helpline are the major planners in their family. They are either asking questions because they are the planners, or they are answering questions because they have information based on their planning.

I do agree with the theory that men are more reluctant to ask for help or directions. That is not necessarily because they research other ways and women don't. I don't think that most of the women are only concerned with what to wear or if they should bring a curling iron, like one person said.

I definitely don't think it is #1. There may be some truth in #2.

Kent...I knew that posting to this helpline while at an outdoor cafe in Paris would have her swooning. But the suggestion to run correlation coefficients over dinner, well, I just might have to hold that until our anniversary.

Kent, correlation coefficients show if Y is related to X, and how closely. For example, in 2004 I found a high correlation between college graduates in a state and votes not for GWB, or percentage of HS dropouts, and votes for George. But just the number of female posts? Correlated to what? Nah.

My husband and I both work full time. He leaves the travel planning to me as he knows I enjoy it---and he likes the results.

He does tease me about the amount of time I spend on travel websites (mostly answering questions, not asking them). But then I point out that I saved us almost $500 on train tickets between Zürich and Milan with a tip I learned from the travel forum on Fodors.com. I feel the time is well-spent, for that and many other reasons.