Dealing with Rude & Obnoxious Passengers on Flights

Steven Slater is definitely a folk hero for every traveler! I wish I had a good answer. Most of the flights I've been on have been okay with regard to planemates, but on my last transatlantic flight I was seated next to a mom and her 4-year-old daughter. The mom slept for maybe half the flight and she didn't bring any toys for her daughter to play with, so the kid rolled around in her seat next to me and sometimes put her feet on me. Occasionally, when the mom was awake, she would sit next to me (I was by the window) with the daughter on her lap and they'd watch part of a movie. I wondered why she didn't sit in the aisle seat, just so all of us could have more room. I finally got so irritated that I went to the back of the plane and stood by the restrooms for half an hour, to get away from them and also to stretch my legs for a little while. The situation wasn't so bad that I had to say something, but it was bad enough that I needed a break from them.

I try and avoid the situation to start with. For instance I pre-booked my seats for my upcoming flight, so I am only sitting next to my mom. I also made sure that it had in seat entertainment. If I have headphones in and am watching a good movie, I am happy and generally oblivious to whats going on around me.

I do not control my sense of outrage, but I do control my behavior in response to it. I try to stay polite, as I don't think escalating the situation is going to help.

Once I had a window seat and the woman behind me put her bare foot up between my seat and the window and rested it on my arm rest. If I turned my head slightly toward the window, her toes were up my nostrils. I turned and said, "Pardon me, but your foot is on my armrest." She said, "YES". I said, still politely but more firmly, "You will need to remove it now, please." She reluctantly finally moved it. My next step would have been to ask the flight attendant to speak to her.

Now, if it's the flight attendant who is rude and obnoxious, I don't have an answer.

Sooo, due to my lack of planning I ended up with a window seat (3 across) coming back from France. Teenage boy picking pimples for two hours next to me until he fell asleep (gross but there it is) and rather large dad on the aisle seat. Four hours into the flight, well, I gotta pee. Tap tap on Dad's shoulder...sorry but I need to get up and use the bathroom. Dad, very irate "we do NOT wake up sleeping teenagers so go to sleep yourself." YIKES! Call button time. I do NOT escalate confrontations but call in the professionals. The Dad made many rolling eyeball movements and such but I was able to step over the troll and Dad got up out of his seat. Ditto on return. I calmed myself by imagining that Dad was probably returning to his equally troll-like wife and his demanding but unsatisfying job in the fast food industry and so who could blame him for being, ah, rude.

I haven't really ever had a major issue with anyone flying. I did have a man who sat in middle seat next to me who took up both armrests and "oozed" onto both seats( meaning he was big) but I chose to ignore him mostly.

I tend to always book an aisle seat so I never have to feel "trapped" and I although loud or whiney/crying children are annoying, I am always grateful I am not the poor parent trying to cope with it, and they generally have my sympathy not anger. I do however rather dislike it when others think it is cute to let their little ones peer over back of seats alot,, (not just a cute peep) ,, or when they decide its ok to let them try and engage strangers in conversation when it is obvious the stranger is trying to sleep, read or eat( in other words ignoring the child hoping it will stop) .

I have never encountered a rude drunken jerk yet,, knock on wood.

How about the ones who want you to change seats so that their group can ALL be together. Go away, book your seats earlier and leave us alone!

I recall a flight from Chicago to Seattle sitting next to an older "gentleman" who spent a good portion of the flight ranting to no one in particular about the ills of society - namely those rude, disrespectful young people (I was 19 at the time).

Usually, when confronted with annoying people, I whip out my sketchbook and let them inspire some great carricatures. If I don't feel like drawing, I just turn up my headphones and try to distract myself from any annoyances unless they are physically invading my space.

And at the risk of starting another this vs. that argument, I do wish airlines would enforce the "if you don't fit into one seat, buy two" policy. I have in several instances been stuck next to a larger person who did not conform to the boundaries of their seat. Weight aside, it's not entirely fair that we each pay for 1 seat, but I only get to use 3/4 of mine!

When someone asks me if they can switch seats so the "group can all be together" I have different responses. If it's reasonable, say I move from one aisle seat to another the answer is always sure. If Dad wants to set next to his wife who is holding the baby on her lap for an 8 hour flight....oh you're sitting in the middle of a 5 across between four huge people...humm, gotta think here. Large groups touring together...can you exchange this seat for something in business class for me? Just a little humor here people. Always try to take the high ground, you'll feel better. Never ever let an idiot/jerk take up space in your head...save head space for wonderful memories of the old couple that invited you to join them for dinner in Florence etc.

I fly a lot and have encountered all kinds. The most momentous was a flight returning to Chicago. I was in business class and evidently a passenger slugged the flight attendant. I saw the bruise! In this instance, the pilot asked everyone to stay seated as we were going to be met by the police. The passengers were escorted off the plane and then we were allowed to deplane.

My flying life vastly improved with the noise canceling headphones. Flights to Orlando can be brutal any time of year, but at spring break they are particularly difficult. I was on one where there were children behind me--I was in the center section--and up a row and across the aisle. They held conversations amongst each other and over us the entire flight. Loved the ear phones. The guy sitting next to me was headed to buy a set before his next flight.

I too am totally sympathetic about the screaming baby. Most of the time there is not much that can be done. But I too can feel really outraged at parents who ill-prepared or have older children that they don't control. We experienced this on a train recently where a 7 or 8 year old child had total temper tantrum that lasted for a half hour. At one point a mom sitting near us went up to see if she could help. It turned out that Dad had taken away one of her toys as a punishment which we too were now all enduring.

I do continue to be amazed by passengers who just think that they are so special that none of the rules pertain to them. Ah well, that when it's time for those headphones again. ; )

Pam

I sat next to a very huge woman on an international flight. I am sure the stewardess placed her next to me as I am petite. The lady immediately raised the arm rest and spilled on onto half my seat. I was smashed in. We all know how small the seats are.

I insisted on having the arm rest down. Needless to say, they moved her.

When she checked in I am sure the airline personnel saw how huge she was. They should have made her buy 2 seats as she could easily fill both seats.

I feel sorry for rude and obnoxious people - because I know they're angry and unhappy people who are going to go to their grave never having enjoyed life.

I don't recall any really rude people on a plane, but I remember one in the airport. This was after a trip from hell from Boston to Pittsburgh. Arrived at airport in Boston at 10:00 am and hit the ground in Pittsburgh at 2:00 am the next morning, only to find our luggage didn't make it. We had to wait in line for half an hour to report the missing luggage. One reason it was a half an hour is because there was a guy in front of us who kept demanding the airline get him a hotel room because he had "a very important business meeting." He was so obnoxious. The fact that the airline rep told him several times there were no hotel rooms in the city did not deter him. He kept it up and up. He apparently thought if he just said it a little louder and a little more indignantly, the woman would crumble to the floor and beg his forgiveness and get a limo to take him to a 4 star hotel. There was a young woman behind him with a little baby who had missed a connecting flight, and she was totally calm and pleasant, and I wanted to say to this guy -- look at her. You could maybe learn something. You know, about grace and humility and good manners.

I've been pretty lucky too. knock on wood Although I would be sympathetic to the parent with the crying baby, or cranky little one. I have more patience with the little ones (even the pre-teens and teens) than the adults. Although I might have tried to find out where the pimple popper went to high school and tell him that if he didn't quit grossing me out, I'd tell all the girls at his high school that he spent the whole flight popping his zits. ;)

More than one person mentioned the noise cancelling headphones. I've seen headphones that fold up and I've seen the ear buds in catalogs. I'd like to save as much space as possible and buy the ear bud ones, but I wonder if they REALLY cancel out the noise as well as the headphones. Has anyone tried the ear bud ones? How much space do the headphones really take up in your bag?

Have both. Good buds are OK but the over the ear head phone is much better but you pay a price in size.

I had an experience once on an international flight - we had just taken off when the man in front of me (window seat) put his seat back, and it went down virtually into my lap (to top it off, he smelled terrible). I felt totally claustrophobic! I called the stewardess to mention it, and she said she was sorry, but his seat was broken - nothing could be done. I'm not sure I would have lasted for 11 hours that way! Another stewardess was called, and she apologized to the man but said he would have to not recline during the flight. He was fine with it, thank goodness.

Anna this one is for you:

Drawings of what to do on a flight from New York to Berlin

Jon, your link was so good!! I especially loved the inflatable neck pillow - hilarious. And George Carlin...genius.

I would much rather have my dog in the cabin, especially on a long flight. And yes comparing dogs to children is silly. I would take the dog any day. Karen, if you ever need someone to take the seat next to you and your dog- call me!

At the time, my seatmate indicated to me that he liked the dog. But you're right, we were not in compliance with the rules. My dog is very small, and very well-trained, and as such is allowed to travel in the cabin in an approved carrier. The baggage hold is not temperature controlled, and recently in the US several puppies died in the baggage hold as a result of that. Almost all airlines allow small animals to travel in the cabin, the rules vary slightly, some are more tolerant than others. I make reservations in advance, and the flight crew know there will be a dog aboard. I reserve my seat in the last row where we're out of the way of other travelers and have very specific plans to deal with whatever problems may occur. I have my health certificate and all neccessary precautions in place. I work closely with his vet to ensure his well-being both during the flight and while traveling. I choose dog-friendly B+Bs to stay in, and follow whatever rules they may have, and I am fully prepared to pay for any damage my dog may cause - which has never happened.
As to why I travel with my dog, maybe thats a personal choice I make. I am not comparing dogs to children, merely saying that the annoyance factor of a screaming child is pretty high.

I've stopped being surprised by the behavior and actions of a certain few with a sense of entitlement. It's sad to say that civility has dropped a couple of notches over the last several years. Blame it on "reality TV" or the over-the-top talking heads on radio, MSNBC or FOX. It still brings a smile to my face when I see random acts of kindness, though. We all have our moments of aggrevation, but we should take pause and place things in proper perspective. Mr Stalter's actions, though amusing in retrospect, were the actions of a very troubled individual. As for what's come to be known as the "bag nazi," there's someone that should garner the attention of federal authorities.

The most "civil" flight of my life (and I've been on a few hundred) with the nicest "FA's" and fellow passengers was coming home from Tan Son Nhut Air Base in 1969 with a plane load of my fellow Marines. You'd think they'd be the rowdiest/nastiest bunch from the images portrayed by Hollywood, but it was the quietest, most peaceful flight of my life. Most of those men were completing 13 months in "aggrevating" conditions and were still in their combat gear. Then you read about some idiot complaining about her carry-on bag. That's proper perspective.

If the dog is quiet, doesn't do its business on the plane, and isn't jumping on anyone or running around, who cares? I'll take it over a screaming baby or some entitled parent's demon child.

I have heard so many comments about Steven Slater but nothing about the passenger who hit Slater in the head with his luggage and then cursed him out. Why is this behavior apparently acceptable and Slater's isn't?

I stick my earplugs in and think evil thoughts about the person doing it! It does astonish me how people are so inconsiderate of others and then are astonished when people ask them to stop.

The worst person I have encountered was a woman making a latch hook rug on a crowded economy flight. I was sat across the aisle from her. The rug was draped in the lap of the person next to her, took up the whole aisle and was draped over my lap too. She was very angry when the stewardess told her to put it away. The rug was well over a metre across!

I few years ago Budget Traveler printed an article that was written by a flight attendant on some of the wackiest, rudest things she had experienced in her 20 years as an attendant. One of the things that popped out at me was the man who took off his shoes and socks and started to clip his toe nails. Whether or not if this is completely true, if that happened in my proximity, I would pull a Steven Slater and FREAK OUT. I do not think I could contain myself. That is sooooooooooo gross!

Flight attendants get the brunt of the flak from everything that happens to passengers when they fly. We were on a domestic flight a couple of years ago which was delayed by about an hour, and ended up being delayed even more when we boarded, and some people were quite rude to the lone flight attendant, who was doing her best to stay perky. It's not her fault that there were problems with the plane, but she's the one that has to handle all the angry passengers.

We fly standby, so we have to be flexible and patient. On the above mentioned flight, we were in the airport for 12 hours with our kids before we finally flew to Madison. Our kids were much better behaved than most of the adults, but I come well prepared. Atlanta airport also used to have play areas with the kids (remind me to complain that they don't anymore -- lots of places to smoke and drink, but nothing for the kids to do). I do take a bit of offense on kids being referred to as "brats." When our son was small, he never went to sleep without a fight. I'd tell the people around us to bear with me for a minute, he'd cry for about 5 minutes, then he'd sleep and we could all sit back.

We're also those people who might ask you to move. With flying standby with a family of 4, we rarely get assigned seats together. We don't mind splitting up 2/2 (in fact, after a couple of weeks of vacation together, sometimes that's preferred), but I can't really have my 3-year-old sitting by herself, next to a stranger for 8 hours. We'll take the middle seats, we don't care.

I think flying standby gives us a different perspective on these "people". It almost makes me laugh how demanding and entitled people can be when they fly (don't wake a sleeping teenager? Seriously? He's not 2 anymore!). We're all stuck in this situation together, I just try to make the best of it.

I find it interesting that the subject dealt with "rude & obnoxious" passengers, yet several people mentioned having to sit next to large or overweight passengers. Do you consider them "rude & obnoxious" because of their size?

I realize that the issue is a difficult one - I've had to sit next to larger passengers, and it can create problems - but I would not classify someone as rude or obnoxious just because they have a weight problem.

Can you make the slider gizmo deploy in flight?

Not without opening the door. When armed, the slide will deploy when the door is opened. I’m not even sure physics would allow for a door to be opened during flight, but crazies have tried it. Cargo doors have opened in flight before, causing crashes or near crashes…the old DC-10 had a history. Regarding large passengers, of course one’s size doesn’t make him or her rude, obnoxious, or a bad person, but I can see how some might think it obnoxious when a fellow passenger is using their own seat plus a quarter of another. I was stuck in a middle seat between two football coaches of large girth once. In fact, the whole plane was loaded with huge football coaches going to a coaching convention. Neither arm rest could go down…their bellies literally prevented it. Talk about uncomfy! The only saving grace was that I was in the first row with plenty of legroom. That was sort of an obnoxious experience. BTW, I fly often, and I can assure you that FAs are unfairly abused every day. Can you imagine if you were verbally assaulted every working day at your own job!

When a large number of people are confined in a small space such as a plane, it is essential that people show some consideration. As a parent I am sympathetic when babies cry, but I have seen parents make no attempt at all to comfort or entertain their little ones, or to teach them proper behavior (such as not kicking the back of the seat in front of them). And of course it is not rude to be large, but when people fail to purchase enough seating to accomodate their size, and then take over a large portion of the seat I paid for, I find that very inconsiderate. They may not consider it their fault that they are large, but it is surely not mine, either. I also find it inconsiderate when people behind me stand up and lean on the back of my seat, pulling my hair and thumping me in the head.

By contrast, I have encountered many polite, considerate, cordial people. People have helped me with my bag, stood aside and motioned me to go in front of them, offered assistance in many ways. Bless them, and I hope others count me in that category.

As for FAs, I am sympathetic to them, to a point. They certainly have to deal with a lot of troublesome people, but one of the primary requirements of their job is to be able to handle that. If they are unable to do so, they probably really should be in another job. And there is a proper way to quit a job when you are unhappy.

First, I don't consider this Slater guy a hero. He went way over board and abused airline property. This country is in bad shape if this is our idea of a hero.

Second, rude passengers. On a flight from Munich to Dulles, the women in front of my wife reclined her seat practically into my wife's lap. At meal time, the lady ate quickly and then - FLOP - back went the seat and almost dumped my wife's meal all over her. My wife said something to her and all she got was "I paid for my seat and I'll recline it all I want." So, every time my wife got up, she grabbed the seat back to pull herself up, thumped around to be sure to bump into the seat, and generally made sure the inconsiderate wench didn't get much shut eye. Maybe not the most mature thing to do, but she asked for it, in my opinion.

Are there more children on flights than 20 years ago? I thought part of the vacation was leaving them with the grandparents!

Well, flying is much less expensive than it was 20 years ago, so families have lots of travel options for vacation instead of just the old station wagon with no seat belts and baloney sandwiches in the cooler. Especially on domestic flights, I often seem to somehow sit very near a crying baby. I don’t care for the noise, but I feel sorry for those little buggers. And, I’ve never really had any issues with kids on a plane in all my years of flying…adults on the other hand can be freakin’ nuts! Some of them simply should be removed and barred from ever flying again.

I also don't consider the FA a hero, although I don't doubt he had a lot to deal with. He should have walked away if his temper was getting to him, and not engaged the emergency slide.

We were gettin on a long delayed Amtrak out of Chicago. Once we were finally on the train, after an hour new engineers had to be driven in because the current ones were over their time limit, so there was another hour delay while we sat on the tracks. The passengers were ticked off and complaining. The car attendant suddenly went off and yelled at all of us, that he'd been working 12 hours and would still be working when he got to DC, and that the engineers were just SO special they didn't have to do that. It was a 5 minute rant, and he was standing about 2 feet from me and my young kids. I actually was frightened. It was poorly handled, although it did shut us all up!

I really like sitting in the last row, on the aisle, where I feel sort of out of the way of everyone else, and the only carry-on luggage I have is the dog, since with a dog you're not allowed anything else. I ask to board early so I can get the dog crammed in under the seat without being stepped on. I am acutely aware that I might be one of those annoying passengers, fussing with the dog, which is inevitable, so I try to stay out of the way. On one flight, Schatz escaped from his carrier and crawled into the lap of the guy sitting next to me, a large man from Poland, and promptly fell asleep, but the gentleman was so nice about it and let him stay, and even covered him up with his own jacket so he could sleep undisturbed for the whole flight. I try to be calm and accepting of others annoying behaviour. I figure - an eight or nine hour flight is a day at the office time-wise, and I'd much rather be on a flight to Europe, no matter how uncomfortable it is.

What if he has to pee or poop (your dog, Schatz, not the Polish guy)? What do you do?

To Kelly:
I don't know if the FA whose story you heard was on our flight to Japan in 1987 or there's more than one toe-nail-clipper-in-public guy, probably the latter. Anyway, we were in a 3 across section; and, yes, the fellow in the 3rd seat pulled out his clipper and gave himself a pedicure.

If a dog crawled out from under a seat and up into my lap, I would be more than just annoyed. Unless it is a service dog, animals do not belong in the cabin of a plane. Ever!

People ask that question alot..and the answer is:
Before we get on the plane, I ask security where I can take him outside, and arrive extra early at the airport so we have time. I am prepared with enzymatic cleaner that every dog owner knows about, and paper towels, and, since I'm on the aisle near the restroom, I take him in the restroom, and if he has to do anything I'm ready to clean it up thouroughly. BUT that has never happened. He waits until we get outside when we arrive. He's not eating or drinking anything-I offer him little sips of water during the flight, but since he's mildly sedated on an herbal pet sedative called Rescue remeby, he's more interested in sleeping. Take-off and landing unsettle him alittle, alot of whining and scratching, but I bend over and place my hand on the mesh covering of his carrier so he knows I'm there and that soothes him. But the pooping and peeing has never been a problem.

This doesn't involve a rude or obnoxious passenger. My husband and I were on a flight to Rome. My husband is very tall and was able to procure a bulk head seat. My aisle seat was one row behind. My husband turned to see that I was ok. The gentleman sitting next to him asked if I were his wife. When my husband said yes, this gentleman graciously got up and offered me his bulkhead seat so that I could sit next to my husband. I did not want to take his seat so I said I was fine where I was. He insisted that it was not a problem and that I take his seat. So, I did. But not after thanking him profusely. We had a great flight and I'll never forget that nice man.

I pay alot extra to travel with my dog. I make every possible effort to avoid being annoying. I don't particularly like screaming children but don't deny them the right to travel. My Poish seat-mate was not bothered at all-if he was, of course I would've done something about it. But I've never had anyone complain about the dog, to me or the flight attendant. I don't complain about other people, and i expect that as long as I comply with the airlines regulations and have paid for my dog to travel, it's nobody's business.

If your dog was in the carrier, how did he crawl up on the lap of the man sitting next to you?

Children are people, and comparing a child to a dog is silly. You can put a dog in a kennel and have them ride in the storage area of the plane, but you can't put children in baggage, now can you?

Don't get me wrong here, I like dogs, I like them alot, but they still do not belong on a plane sitting with human passangers.

Dogs are around humans all the time, I don't see a problem with it...in fact, if I were to fly with my dog, I would not want her in baggage...I'd pay extra to have her with me. Actually, that might make long flights more bearable.

Camille: I’ve actually seen that sort of thing happen more than once. I recall a time right after 9/11 when a first class passenger came back to a young (like 18) sailor in economy and insisted he take the first class seat. At first, the sailor looked kind of embarrassed and declined. The first-class passenger insisted, the sailor moved, and everybody cheered. It was moving.

I find it very annoying to board the plane, find my seat only to see someone already sitting there. If it's just a mistake - no problem. However, there was one occasion where a woman was sitting in my aisle seat and when I told her she was in my seat she told me that she wanted to sit by her husband and she didn't think I would mind switching seats with her and pointed to her empty seat up front. Well "MY" wife was on the aisle seat next to mine so "No" I don't want a different seat I want the seat I reserved 6 months ago. The lady in my seat raised a ruckus and slung her carry-luggage up to her real seat and gave the rest of the passengers quite a nice show of childish rants and raves. Her husband was embarrassed beyond belief and apologized to everyone...even told his ranting wife to calm down.

Good grief lady, if you want to switch seats with me at least have the courtesy to ASK before you just take it!

Some folks see hearing aids as a handicap, but many times on airplanes with noise disturbances, I just turn them off. Before the hearing aids, I would put in may ear phones and listen to my iPod. Speaking of crying babies, when I started to fly (1946) smoking was allowed on airplanes. Well, eventually the airlines put all of the smokers in the back of the plane before they banned smoking altogether. Now, how about putting all the folks with small children and babies in the back of the plane so they can all have "fun" together? Regarding the reclining seat issue when food is served, numerous times when the person in front of me insists on reclining their seat all the way back when food is being served, I politely ask the FA to request the person put their seat back upright so that I can use my tray of the food. That has always worked. Also, at 6'3" and flying coach (I still dream about hitting the lottery so I can afford to fly upfront)
I always tell the person sitting right in front of me to please warn me if they intend to recline their seat as my knees are already imbedded in the back of their seat. Usually makes for some kind of accommodation.

I agree - what part of "reserved seat" is hard to understand? If one has the forethought to reserve a seat on a plane, or a train - a similar thing happened to me on a German train - especially if you've paid for the reservation, then that's YOUR seat. I'd move if there was a really good reason for it, but I have my reasons too, for reserving a seat in the first place.

No one has yet mentioned the funny business that starts when the plane lands. I can't understand the shoviness that occurs. Listen, we all want to get off the plane, but I choose to sit in my seat because standing in a half crouch is undignified and kinda weird. I stand up, drag my carry-on out of the bin in one motion and start walking. So why are there always these jerks who seem new to the concept of an orderly progression off the plane? I have been known to short-arm people who apparently have a laser-like focus on the exit door. Our family will now exit our aisle since it's our turn, thank you very much.

I totally hear what you're saying Neil, and I agree with you. But there are people who wait until it's their turn, stand in the aisle blocking the way, and then start to gather up all their stuff and take a very long time to do it. Meanwhile, there may be people waiting that have little or nothing and would just like to go by but they can't. And some of those people waiting may have a very short amount of time to catch a connecting flight. You never know. There's two sides to this one.

Good for him! I wish flight attendants had the authority to arrest passengers if they don't comply with the rules.

I'm amazed the number of obnoxious passengers who don't think the rules apply to them. From continuing on their iphones/blackberry's etc after multiple times of the flight attendant saying anything with an on/off button needs to off. To the idiots who think turning over their electronic devices is "turning them off.

Then there are the rude ones who get up when they aren't supposed to. I was on a flight where they announced due to FAA regulations we weren't supposed to get up within 30 minutes of landing in the US and this moron gets up immediately after. The flight attendant just stood there and looked at him.

They had to announce it multiple times because others kept getting up.

I'd say they should threaten to have the passengers arrested if they don't comply

I haven't had really bad experiences, but my mom and sister have a not so funny anegdote from their trip to Paris a couple of years ago.

They sat behind a pretty "hefty" couple who had their seats to the reclining position almost the entire flight and my mom and sis could barely eat their meals. But that's not the bad part. The worst thing is that this couple kept "flatulating" the entire night. How do you ask a flight attendant to tell the couple in front of you to kindly stop passing gas? :)

Rather have a dog in cabin then a poorly behaved or supervised child.

I also resent people who ask to change seats when I booked ( months in advance) an aisle seat,, and they are offering to switch me for their middle seat( fat chance) . I book an aisle seat since I go to the washroom alot, and I don't like disturbing people by crawling over them often. I would only consider changing seats if it was a mother and child seperated. If two adults travelling together want to sit together either book it , or tough it out, its not like it would kill someone to be apart for a few hours.

I have worked as a shop assistant, and in that job you can deal with rude customers. I have even had to evict a group of kids who were vandalising the store. That is nothing compared to what flight attendants have to deal with. If they have a rude passenger, they can be stuck with them for hours. And in the admittedly rare cases where passengers have turned violent they cannot call the police, in the way that shop staff can.

Sarah ~ That's what I've been wondering. What happened to the person who was up and getting her luggage out when she was supposed to still be buckled into her seat?

I worked as a clerk in a grocery store in high school. I can't imagine being trapped in a relatively small, enclosed space with some of customers I had come through my checkout line. I was always happy knowing they'd be gone in a few minutes, or I could call a supervisor.

I know some people have connecting flights or have meetings to get to. They may also have bags to pick up and might be worried about someone else taking them. I'm fortunate that I don't have to fly as part of my job, I'm able to get non-stop flights, and don't need a team of porters to carry my luggage ;). I usually just wait until nearly everyone is off the plane and then get up get my bag and leave. Otherwise, I'm just stuck in a traffic jam.

I wouldn't want to suddenly find a dog in my lap, but I wouldn't mind it being on my neighbor's lap (assuming it's my neighbor's dog of course.) My only concern about pets on planes is if other passengers have allergies.

I'm glad you all are sharing your stories. I'm starting to feel more "flight prepared." Now I just need to pack noise cancelling headphones, a good eye mask, and a gas mask in my seat bag and I'll be all set. ;)

With as many things as the airlines are selling to make revenue, I'm surprised that the flight attendants don't walk up and down the plane selling noise-cancelling headphones. They'd make a killing!

Charlie - my wife complained to the FA and the FA asked the passenger if she could raise her seat a bit. The passenger said "no" and the FA apologised to my wife but said there wasn't anything else she could do - the passenger was using the seat as designed.

I don't think of Slater as a hero. He lost it. I have sympathy for attendants because it's a horrible job but, like we used to teach bank tellers, you can't control other people but you can control your reaction to those people.

I always wonder if rude people realize they are being rude? Many behaviors can be considered rude, many of those are rude in one culture but not in others.

Some examples off the top of my head:
Not brushing the toilet behind yourself in Europe. Using water/energy as if it were cheap.
Not queing up and pushing your way to the front (rude in the West but not in Asia).
Not closing the bathroom door when you leave (especially France).
Not greeting someone before you ask for something.
Not greeting shop keepers when you enter their shop.

I am so surprised that the airlines haven't thought of this because it's right up their alley. The solution to having people stand up when they aren't supposed to, not turning off electronics, etc, is to fine them. Twenty bucks here and fifty bucks there. We could all have little bar codes around our necks. As a bonus, they could credit us for being good. It's like construction zones on the highway. No one slows down because they may injure another human being-they slow down because they may get 1000's in fines.

I was one of those parents with a cranky child. We were going to my wife’s grandmother’s funeral in Northern Nevada. My daughter was 2 ½ at the time. The flight we were taking from PHX to RNO was late, so this was the first problem. The second problem was my daughter refusing to take her nap. The third problem was that unbeknownst to us, since we had bought a ticket for my daughter, she had to be in her seat for take off, and my daughter was in the throws of a major tantrum. We were asked to leave the plane. Luckily the pilot having heard our story asked the passengers if they minded our crying child, and allowed us to get back on the plane. When we arrived in Reno all the deplaning passengers were very understanding and offered use their sympathies.

I was on a US bound plane from Seoul, sitting in my aisle seat where young man in the middle seat pleaded with me to switch with his girl friend, in the middle seat in the row just ahead of me. I refused--I've had a DVT episode in the past so I book an aisle seat to make it easier for me to walk around during the flight. The two of them whined and pouted about it, then during the flight stood up in their seats and started kissing! I tapped the guy on the shoulder and suggested they knock it off and he wouldn't so I whipped out my digital camera and started snapping away. They sat down again pretty fast! I know, pretty rude of me but still...

Ruth - yes, thank you for your response. Isn't it against the law to disobey a flight attendant? At the very least it's a serious issue. If I were on that plane, I would disapprove of the passenger's behavior a lot more than I would of Slater's.

This book cam out a few months ago and it sounds like all of us would enjoy it: "The Titanic Awards: Celebrating the Worst of Travel" by Doug Lansky. It was discussed on NPR (Talk of the Nation) a few days ago.

Yea, JER!

Just imagine what might have, ummm, 'occurred' had they sat together...I say, 'snap away'!!!

That's an entirely different topic that FAs have to deal with...let's leave THAT one alone LOL!

I'd actually like to rent a lap cat for my overseas flight - I could finally relax and dose off a little...but a puppy dog would be just fine ;-)

Do moms and dads notice their kids kicking the seat in front of them, or what? I would have been hit upside the head if I relentlessly kicked the seat in front of me back in the day. Philly to Munich, 4-6 hours of kicking, mom decided to not know English when I turned around and pointed out that her kid was kicking our seat.

I've never had to use this idea, but years ago my mother told me that the best way to keep kids from kicking the seat in front is just to take their shoes off. They are a lot less likely to kick with vigor if their toes are getting crunched! Has anyone tried this?

The most rude/obnoxious thing that has ever happened to me was on a flight from LA to Cleveland - I'm in the window seat, the flight is completely full, no place to move to, and the guy in the middle seat next to me chewed tobacco the entire trip. He had a glass jar with a lid in his carry-on bag stowed under the seat in front of him. He would periodically reach for this jar, unscrew the lid and SPIT. It was so gross, I couldn't avoid seeing it because I could see what he was doing out of the corner of my eye. I ended up having to turn my body toward the window so I could not see him at all and ended up with a sore back and neck when the flight was over.

On an early morning flight from Cleveland to Detroit (1 hour), a woman insisted on changing her 12 month old child’s diaper. She had the window seat and the child was lying all over the woman in the center seat (a stranger) while she was trying to accomplish the task. The lady in the center was really upset and called the flight attendant. The FA directed the lady to the restroom. I was in the aisle seat and jumped up to let everyone out. The mom was angry, yelling, kid started crying… what a mess.

CNN.com is reporting that Slater wants his job back with Jet Blue...

"I don't think of Slater as a hero. He lost it. I have sympathy for attendants because it's a horrible job but, like we used to teach bank tellers, you can't control other people but you can control your reaction to those people."

I have to agree. The end result is that he is out of a job that he supposedly loved. He is more a poster child for bad decisions than a hero to me.

Flying from CDG last January was very difficult because of an unruly child and parents who didn't care to be disturbed. I love how the father kept his Bose noise cancelling headphones on while the mother simply continued reading. You gotta love parents like that!

I did buy a Bose noise cancelling headphone set before my flight to Hawaii (got back on Saturday), and it is worth the hefty price tag!

Re the guy dipping & spitting -- Yuuucccckkkk! I'm sure he would have had to deal with my puke in his lap.
The worst we ever had to deal with was a newlywed couple who demanded to sit together -- in seats already reserved for a mom and two small children. The couple refused to get up despite the pleas from the FA. Finally the pilot walked down the aisle and informed them that the plane would not take off until they went to their assigned seats. The guy kept arguing with the pilot who kept firmly repeating himself. Finally the guy gave a really huffy shrug and made some derogatory comments under his breath and the couple went to sit in their respectively assigned seats separated from each other for all of 3 hours! I'm sure they've suffered from mental anguish ever since.

I've found that passengers who don't dress like they've just rolled out of bed; who truly understand the "2 items carry-on" rule; who smile and are pleasant to the airline employees and other passengers, are the ones who are going to be treated better by both other passegners as well as airline employees. That's the bottom line. I've found that when I practice these things, it sure makes taveling a lot more pleasant.

Yeah, James - 'pish pish pish pish' from the cymbals, and it's Never Real Music LOL! You can hear some of that stuff from the aisles!

Kelly, Gulfport, I'd been whacked, too! Actually, I knew better than to kick the seat, pull people's hair, etc. in the first place. But one look from Mom...OR the person I'm annoying...I'd be a (quiet!) puddle of tears!!!

And Kim, I'm with you, too. FAs aren't your punching bag, you aren't going to a sleep-over, you KNOW what a carry-on looks like (LOL!). FAs can make-or-break my flight (and vice-versa); I'm gonna be an a** to them?!? Don't think so! It hurts getting whacked with a beverage cart ;-)

I used to watch the Southwest Airlines TV show, "Airline" but after approx. 7 mins my blood pressure would cause my temples to throb and I wanted to strangle something! (same thing for "Airline UK"!) And besides, there were really only about 4 episodes; people kept doing the same stooopid things over and over on each episode.

And while I'm at it, it's sure going to be a LONG WALK to Europe when the airlines allow cellphones...(clawing my own eyes out)

Oh, and to answer your question, Ed, about how I control my sense of outrage...so far, it's involved my iPod jammed into my ear canals, and perhaps an extra bottle of wine...In the future, it may involve an emergency slide...;-)

People are stupid.

Except us.

Sarah, I don't know if it's against the law not to follow the directions of an FA but I know that the Captain has the final say and can throw you off the plane, or inform the authorities to have you arrested if you are an unruly passenger. I think Janis's story illustrates that.

Also, I've been hearing a lot of stories coming out now that Slater had that gash on his head when the passengers were boarding the plane and that he was being a jerk throughout the flight. Perhaps this is why the offending passenger that supposedly rude passenger was never charged with anything.

I'm always polite to anyone whose place of work I enter. I liken it to another world or culture where there are or may be (slightly) different rules and (especially in the case of an airplane) the FAs are there to help you navigate it. They are even there at the door to welcome me to this world, so naturally, I smile and say hello back. Now that I'm reading this thread, I'll bet that they are really sizing up each passenger to see who the possible trouble makers will be. ;)

I like the idea of the fines. One warning and then a fine. Unfortunately that won't get that jerk's seat out of your lap. :/

It seems to me that the seat switchers, the carry-on rule breakers and the troublesome children (except the crying little ones) could easily be prevented if the people involved would just take the time to anticipate possible problems and take action BEFORE boarding, they'd be less intrusive on the nerves of the other passengers. The internet is full of site explaining all the rules and if they don't have internet access, I can't see why they can't call the airline and ask. They're just plain thoughtless.

P.S. I heard years ago that one of the reasons babies cry on the plane is because of the ear popping. I know it hurts my ears until they pop, but I'm aware of it and know how to make my ears pop. I can't imagine how painful and frightening it is for them.

I always try to me a model passenger and my tolerance is high. So far, I haven't experienced anyone rude. Maybe once, during a domestic flight home where a brother and sister were arguing and insulting each other. They were adults, family members and trading insults at each other and it seemed like they wanted everyone to hear it. <br> If it's a short flight, I don't mind swapping seats with another. But I don't like giving up my aisle/window seat for the middle seat. But if I must, then I hope good karma will find me. I don't even think twice on asking someone if they want to trade their good seat for an unfavourable seat. I do get a bit annoyed when someone is already sitting in my spot. If it's an honest mistake and you find your right seat, all is forgiven but don't sit in my spot and tell me I have a new seat# without asking me first. I'm telling the teacher on you lol <br> I recline my seat slowly to avoid sudden drops and not hit the person behind. I've seen it happen to others before when a lady suffered a bleeding nose. If I happen to be sitting near the window, I do my best to limit my trips to the restroom and besides I don't really like using the restroom on planes. Or if the person beside me needs to go, I'll get up, smile at that them and tell them it's no worries...nature calls right? <br> Crying babies, I've had times where I sat next to a mother who did her best to calm baby down. What can I do other than smile? I may see myself in that jam in the future. Luckily, I have my noise-canceling earbuds. They are Audio-Technica CKM-70 and I stumbled on them when in Tokyo. Cost me a pretty penny but are fantastic and I never blast my iPod.

I'm an American living in Germany, so I fly around Europe a lot and back to the US. Regarding dogs-if the airline allows it, then it's ok. I took my small Yorkie in the cabin in 2002 (the other 2 were with the luggage, and none the worse for wear) and he was so good. When it was time for him to "go" I took him to the bathroom, and put him on a disposable potty pad, wrapped it up so it wouldn't smell (only urine luckily) and put it in the trash. We left the bathroom smelling fine, certainly no worse than after some people used it. Or no worse than some Europeans smell. Another time, a guy didn't want me to recline my seat as it cut into his legroom. He had moved to the seat behind me so he could sit by his friend, albeit a seat in between them. After a nice discussion, I called the FA and she told him I could recline my seat, and if he didn't like it he could move to the middle seat, angle his legs to the empty middle seat, or move back to his original seat. He shut up. Other passengers clapped. And as far as large people being rude or obnoxious, yes,if you know you can't fit in those seats, (and you know who you are) it is rude to not buy 2 seats or go first class. I should not have less than a whole seat (especially on a transatlantic flight) because of you.

PS to Jo about not putting children in the cargo section but dogs should go there-my dog was MUCH better behaved than MANY children I've seen on flights. I suspect many people would put some kids in the cargo section during flights if it were possible, I know I would!

"Flying from CDG last January was very difficult because of an unruly child and parents who didn't care to be disturbed. I love how the father kept his Bose noise cancelling headphones on while the mother simply continued reading. You gotta love parents like that!" Eli....It sounds like we were on the same flight! I flew back from CDG in January and we were right behind a little girl that was horrid! She even kept trying to bash the window out! Yikes! The parents were oblivious,for the most part. That was the worst flight I had ever been on. I was really hoping a FA would try to put a stop to it, but it didn't happen.

I just got back from Colorado (ran the Leadville 100 mile Trail Run) and was surprised to see this thread still alive and kicking. Anyways, on my flight back from Denver, I got to talking to a woman sitting next to me who used to be an FA for PanAm back in the 70's and 80's. She said her "fantasy" was to be armed with a roll of duct tape and to have the authority to use it at will. To the verbal abuser...duct tape across the mouth. The child jumping in the seat...duct tape. The moron that pulls on the back of seats to get up...duct tape their hands behind their backs. The guy who gets up every 15 minutes to pee...duct tape a depends to him. She was cracking me up because she was truely sincere in her comments. She said that on a per capita basis, the worst passengers, by far, were the "pigs" (her words) in first class. On top of being R & O, they were loud, demanding, demeaning slobs. She said, "Next time you take a transatlantic flight, notice just how nasty the floors and seats in the first class cabin appear as the rest of us in steerage class file by to the exit door." You know, she's right.

This is a great topic. I to have had some awful experiences. The worst was when I had 3 small children behind me. They also had the seats across from me as the were a family of 5. They kept trading seats the entire flight. Everytime I feel asleep one would get up and grap my seat and wake me up. It was beyond frustrating. I got no sleep at all. It was a non-stop flight that I paid extra for, which was even more annoying. I finally asked the flight attendant for some assistance and all got was a very rude flight attendant, no help at all. What would you like me to do???? I also am very sympathetic to children on a flight, but a little consideration and discipline was in order!

Oh, First/Business Class looks like a disco-gone-bad somewhere around 5am LOL!!! Good Heavens! It looks like a stock-trading floor at closing bell - I can't even make out what some of it is! And the Goodie Bags on international flights? Strewn about everywhere. Toothbrush here, slipper socks there, bottle of hand lotion under there...Yikes! Instead of bringing those little-bitty rolls of duct tape, I'm upgrading to a full-size roll...;-) You go, girl!

My pet hate is people who stretch their feet so far in front of them that you look down and see their feet between your own.... always seems to happen to me... I find a well placed accidental stab with a stiletto tip causes a quick retreat though!

Thee most obnoxious are those who should know better- set their seat back as far as it will go, so they are lying in youyr lap. "Entitlement". Flight attendants will not move them

I love to fly, and if there's a way to fly to where I'm going, I'll gladly pay a bit more. With that being said, I do have some pet peeves. 1)I do not want to share my life story with the person sitting next to me. I hate it when someone starts chatting, and doesn't get the hint even when I say, "I'm sorry, but I'd like to try and rest on this flight". I'll usually put in my earbuds and listen to my iPod, or start reading. 2)I have absolutely no patience for adults travelling with their children who do not bring any form of entertainment for their child. Come on, throw in a coloring book or a stuffed animal or something! I will ask to be moved if the child starts screaming, throwing things, kicking the back of my seat or starts throwing a temper tantrum in the aisle. (Yes, it has happened.) 3)It drives me absolutely crazy when TSA, the airline and flight attendants allow someone on the flight with 3-4 carryon items. I had the unfortunate pleasure of sitting next to one of these morons, and she was trying to cram stuff under the seat in front of me since the area by her feet was full. (I had a small TravelPro flight bag under the seat in front of me already, so there was minimal room.) This woman then proceeded to attempt to shove her roller bag into the overhead next to mine, and surprise, it didn't fit. She started to take my bag out and move it further back in the cabin, but I told her that my bag was staying put. I made it through the flight, but did ask her if she knew how to read as we were deplaning, since she had too many bags and her bags were not within carry-on size/weight guidelines. I don't think she appreciated that!

As annoying as Easyjet and other budget airlines can be about their pickiness over bag size, I think some other airlines could learn from them. Someone could be looking for bags that are oversize for carry-on and make passengers check them.

I roll my eyes, close my eyes, and go back to sleep.

i don't see the problem with reclining the seats. come on now, the seats don't recline THAT much, believe me, i've spent enough sleepless overnight flights to know that.

I ALWAYS have someone in front of me who reclines their seat all the way and I HATE it. It invades my space. My last trip to Paris, I purchased a few inches more legroom on United (Economy Plus?) and it made a huge difference.