"If it makes you feel better to think you are a traveller or ( heaven help us!) a pilgrim good for you, but you are still a tourist..."
Yup. And no matter how intensely you wish to understand "European life" or "the European perspective", the wannabe traveler/pilgrim searching for generalizations is fighting a losing battle. Conversations with locals - even if you share the same level of language skills - may make your visit more interesting, but they will also be...
- random and few in number (extremely anecdotal evidence gathering)
- conditioned by one's own pre-conceived notions - whether accurate or inaccurate - about country X (confirmation bias)
- conditioned by one's status as a tourist (locals aren't necessarily going to interact with you like they do others; outside observer's paradox. Also... there's a commonly-recognized European tendency to be less open with strangers.)
You could spend 8 hours a day interviewing locals during your 2-3 week visit - and still have nothing but junk for evidence to mull over.
If the French bakery gal treats you dismissively, or tells you to take your imperialist backside home, what do you conclude about that? That the French are rude, or hate Americans? That our government in fact must be imperialist?
This notion that you can contribute to international understanding, or be an ambassador for your homeland, or see your homeland through the eyes of the average European just by traveling for 2-3 weeks and staying 3 days here and 3 days there, is a lot of wishful thinking with no evidence behind it - a lot of presumptuous bunk, IMHO.
Do Swiss, Italian, and Swedes vacationing in the USA gain enhanced understanding of the American experience and actually acquire it - whatever that is? I doubt that hitting NYC and a few national parks or similar can achieve that. It's no different in reverse. It sounds noble. It might make us feel better about having the financial resources for European travel, or feel more knowledgeable about the planet and it's people than those who do not or cannnot travel abroad, but I think intellectual modesty and honesty have to play a role here. I enjoy interpersonal chats with locals when I am able to have them in my travels. I still think about the chat I had with a Belgian guy and my girlfriend at the time on a train trip through Yugoslavia to Greece 50+ years ago. But I can't pretend, beyond what they mean to me personally, that these one-on-ones have the potential to end wars or pollution.