4 things I hate about Europe

I couldn't possible count the number of times I've been involved in a conversation with my wife at the table at a restaurant (over here) and, had the waiter(-ress) come up and start asking us "how's everything? Would you like some dessert? Etc" without even checking to see if I was talking. Didn't butting in used to be considered rude. Now, it seems, it just working for a bigger tip.

And, I agree with Liz.

I agree with Liz too. I try to go other places too, but I definitely have the Europe fever...

I also hate that my 1.00 USD = 0.67 EUR

Interesting reading, Kate. I have to say I was surprised by his observations. I've almost always gotten excellent service in Europe, and I find the people to be extremely polite. In general, I have found European's are not as outgoing and openly friendly as Americans. They tend to be more reserved and quiet. But I have never felt people were rude or unfriendly.

As for food, the big cities in Europe (at least the ones I've been to) have food from lots of different countries. The smaller towns, not so much. But isn't that the same in the US?

And finally convenience - the US is probably ahead in having stores open longer hours and on Sunday, but that's not a big issue with me (although it can be a pain when stores are not open for two hours at lunch time or when restaurants are closed from 2-6). Also lots of museums are closed on Monday in the US too.

Oh how could he list all that food and not mention Mexican (or TexMex) or BBQ? Really, when I came back from an amazing 3 weeks in Europe, all I wanted was chips, salsa and tacos.

Other than the part about convenience, I have to disagree with this guy. Yes stores close early in the evening and aren't open on Sundays. But then, I lived for years in Pennsylvania when grocery store had to close on Sunday, and I survived.

Other than that, I can't say for Paris. I've only been there a few days. But he should go to Germany.

When I first went to Europe, I expected service to be inferior. It's not. I find waiters in Germany to be very professional and attentive. I've never had poor service. Tip incentive is a myth created by restaurateurs in this country to get gullible consumers to buy into paying most of their labor costs, so they can show prices that are lower than you really pay.

I love the food in Germany. Their breads are far superior to anything in our supermarkets. I've seen Chinese restaurants in Germany, but I always eschew them for German food. Hardly anything can compare to a good Jäger or Zigeuner Schnitzel with Spätzle or Pommes. No one in this country can make Pomme Fritz like the Europeans. But my all-time favorite has to be Boeuf au Poivre, Pepper Steak, in France.

American "politeness" is largely superficial. I do think our "how are you-s" are insincere, particularly when they don't wait for an answer. Americans presumptuously call you by your first name, like you are their best buddy, even if they hardly know you. In Germany, it's Herr Schmidt or Frau Mayer until you form a relationship.

When was the last time you greeted your store clerk with "Good morning or "Good day"? In Germany it is customary to greet the salesperson in a shop with "Guten Tag" or, in Bavaria, "Gruß Gott". It's also customary to greet everyone in the breakfast room of your Pension with "Morgen" and they return the greeting.

This guy has spent too much time in Paris, I think.

I hate that it is so far away.
I hate that I can't go more often.
I hate that I will never be able to see it all.
I hate that my love of Europe keeps me from exploring the rest of the world well....

Agree 100% with Denver Liz!

I also agree with Liz, 100%.

Lee’s right, and…

You mean there’s something wrong with the artificially friendly, often incompetent, and unbelievably obnoxious wait staff in U.S. dining establishments of all shapes and sizes? I thought Americans loved to know the name of the server, the fact that they’ll be taking care of you tonight (whoa), the concern for how we doin', the reassurance that there’s no problem when you say thank you (used to be you’re welcome), and repeated follow-up visits to ensure everything’s okay? I’m really not trying to beat up on the workers, but the system is bothersome beyond belief. Isn’t bring menu, take order only when asked to, bring food, check in only when asked, and bring check only when asked much better?

Since we're taking a poll:

Convenience: I agree. I hated the "blue laws" in my town when I was a kid, and I love it now that grocery stores and Walmart are open on Sundays. I also like having a few places open all night, or at least until 11 p.m. The late hours in America make it very convenient for consumers.

Service: I've had good and bad service all over the world. I do think tipping gives a good incentive, generally, for good service, despite anecdotal instances of some servers being overly anxious for a tip, to the point of interrupting our conversation.

Food: I did have a miserable BLT at an Amsterdam sidewalk café once, but what should I have expected, ordering something like that in Europe! I can indeed imagine Americans in Europe for long periods who miss the food back home. That's perfectly understandable and, having hosted 3 foreign exchange students over the years, I certainly know that Europeans over here get to missing their own home cooking, too!

Politeness: I like how, when you enter a small store in Italy or France, it's common to say hello to the owner, and get some acknowledgment back. I think they can be just as friendly, or unfriendly, as shops in New York or other American cities. In smaller towns on both continents, you're likely to find more politeness than in busy, impersonal cities. That's just the way it is, I think (of course there are always a few exceptions to every rule).

James: "...have you ever been to Japan? That's a non-tipping culture, and anybody who claims European and Japanese service is similar is naive. Japan is clearly superior (in more ways than one). Or are you going to say that the Japanese are artificial like the Americans?"

No, I'm going to say that the Japanese have "better raising" than the rest of us. Very different culture.

European waiters and waitresses are adequately friendly yet significantly more professional than their American counterparts. This is beyond question.

These discussions can border on being silly. The original article I viewed as being slightly humorous if not a back handed slap at American culture. If he had called it "differences" instead of "what I hate" I bet the reactions would have been very different. Because that is what we are discussing -- cultural differences -- not good or bad or right or wrong. Just differences. And everyone tends to react differently to the differences.

I have lived in the west almost all of my life and I could make a similar list of dislikes about southern folk, some New Yorkers, etc. When I was first engaged my father wasn't real happy about my marrying an "Easterner" -- South Bend, Indiana. It is just differences -- some we like and some we don't.

I love Liz's response and agree with it. However, I did think of one thing that bugs me about Europe -- you have to beg to get the check at the end of your meals; that is if you can find your waiter/waitress. (Where do they go after they serve you the food?) It would actually be nice if you wanted to linger -- a lot of times in the US you get the feeling that they can't wait to usher you out the door so they can get another paying customer in. However, when I'm on vacation, I don't like to spend hours in restaurants; I'm usually in a hurry to see the next thing on my list. Or if it's dinner, I'm in a hurry to get to bed because I'm so tired from all the things I saw during the day.

Cold water with meals. And ice.

I love Europe, but in my experience cold water - with ice - and in large quantities - are hard to come by. It's not because I'm cheap, I just like to drink lots of water and I like it icy. Wish it wasn't such a chore to get this routinely.

David- I AGREE!!! Icy water is one of God's good gifts. I really miss it when I travel. Also water foutains for a quick sip just about anywhere. At home I miss "sparkling" water and good public transportation.

Carroll, if you eat at McDonald, you will not have that problem. I love it. We can finish that bottle of wine at our leisure. BUT, you can also solve that problem by politely says, We need to be at the Theater at 2000, could you bring the check with coffee, or dessert, or whatever. May times they will not bring the check unless you specific ask for it. Why should they be required to read your mind?

Frank: "Why should they be required to read your mind?"

That's a stretch. Carroll never said they should be so required.

Carroll is just bugged that it's sometimes hard to run them down to get your check. That's reasonable. It bugs me to.

In June of this year we had cappuccino and snacks at a sidewalk cafe near the Tower of Pisa. We sat a good while, about 10 a.m - 10:45. When we were ready to leave, I waved to our waiter, who was standing 4 feet from me. He looked right at me, but ignored me.

A moment later he passed by our table. I tapped his arm lightly to get his attention and said, "Il conto, per favore." He nodded.

Five minutes later he was standing 4 feet from me again, just standing there looking off in the distance. I waved at him. He ignored me.

I walked over him and told him we needed to get our check. He said, in excellent English, "Oh, I only take the orders and bring the food. You'll have to get the check from that woman over there."

Grrrrr.

Four things I hate about Europe:

1) It is a long way from here
2) It takes a long time to get there from here
3) It is expensive to get there from here
4) I don't get to spend enough time there.

Chris pretty much summed it up for me!

I agree with Lee, Chris and Liz!

Now we need to add our thoughts on that blog and show them, LOL

It's funny how we sometimes have a tendency to berate our own culture! I was raised to always say "hello" or "good morning" to a store clerk or a shop owner, or be polite to the waiter/waitress in a restaurant. We are not all "ugly Americans". And, yes, I have seen rude behavior all over the world.

But, I have to agree with others...I can't go to Europe too much or too often!

I don’t believe anyone has mentioned public transportation, but Europe’s system is far superior as we all surely know. It’s hard to compare such a small continent to a very large country like ours, but we could learn a lot and rationalize our own systems on both coasts. Instead of borrowing money from China (and then promising phony high-speed rail), financing could come from higher federal gas taxes. It would be worth it to have rail, bus, tram, and metro systems comparable to Germany, France, or Spain. We could even heavily tax SUVs and non-farm/work pick-up trucks to help pay for it and kill two birds with one stone.

Our N. American world has become a place where we don't need to be as organized anymore. If we forget to buy milk on our regular grocery shopping trip, we can get it later--even at 2 am. If we forget to find directions to a place, we can do it on the spot with our iPhones. Does this give us more time to follow leisurely pursuits? Or do we have less leisure time because we don't have to be organized? Hmmm....

I agree with the part about things not being open. In the US you can get anything you want most hours and virtually every store is open into the evenings at least six nights a week.

European stores have significantly fewer hours. It forces you to plan your shopping more carefully. As someone who isn't into living by my daytimer, I prefer shopping at my convenience.

Individual opportunity was always the greatest selling point in the US.

The US has much more open access to higher education than Europe (although the elementary and secondary schools are much better in Europe).

Entrepreneurship and openess to new and better ideas has given America a lot of advances, higher standard of living and more jobs than Europe. I think we're losing our advantages now, however, and that's sad.

Perhaps better access to higher education in the US is a valid point, but it is shameful that the average young college graduate has to start out in life $80,000 in debt (for a public education) to the world’s mega-banks before the ink has even had a chance to dry on their diplomas. Many European countries have a better approach in my opinion.

Also, I'm not sure how scientifically or statistically valid this two-year old “study” is, but NYC is number 1 in the world with respect to politeness. It doesn’t look like this takes cultural differences into account, however. Asian countries are at the bottom, although I must say that Asian people seem to me to be among the most polite people I meet. Who knows, Reader’s Digest does lean a bit to the right. Interesting…

http://www.readersdigest.ca/mag/2006/07/polite.php

BTW, I’ve had the pleasure of working with and meeting many immigrants (documented and otherwise) and refugees from around the world over the last couple of years. It’s amazing to see just how common the American Dream is for these folks. I’ve never met anyone from these groups who didn’t sincerely love America and the opportunity this country affords. Even though they may be marginalized in our system, they feel rich in so many ways…this is very common.

Michael, great post.

I don't understand why we need to have places opened 24 hours in the States. I also don't get why they stay open for any length of time on Thanksgiving day or other public holidays. Why can't people go do their shopping and not wait to run out for last minute things?

When I lived in Europe I sure learned how to get everything I needed BEFORE the shops closed for the weekend (Sundays), and then the half days on Thursdays I believe.

Our people here work too many hours, and don't have enough time to RELAX! No wonder we have so many stressed out folks. We have so much in America, but never have the time to truly enjoy.

One of the reasons I LOVE Europe is because of the lack of "fake sincerities", i.e. the hi-how-are-you people (which I dont even respond to here anymore and people don't even notice). Where I live in Boulder, I think its the fake nice capital of the world. People are polite in Europe, they are just more reserved. When I have needed help finding a place, one man even got out his Iphone and mapped it out for me.
Europeans are polite and helpful,they are just not as rude, presumptious and intrusive as americans can be.

I also don't mind that when I am in London, places close early on Sundays. I just plan to use that day for sightseeing and picture taking instead of shopping.

For everyone who likes to be able to grocery shop in the middle of the night -- I bet you have never had a menial service job that requires such hours for such low pay. I remember when my workplace (public library)started opening on Sundays a woman said how nice it was that she could have family time at the library on a Sunday. I replied that it wasn't very nice for all the staff to have to leave their families on a Sunday. She looked stunned and said "I never thought of that".

The thing I hate most about Europe is.........is that I love it so dang much. I feel guilty because as an American, I am supposed to be patriotic and think that we are the best and be in support of all things American. But I am not, and I feel guilty about that. I have gone to Europe 4 years in a row, and am about to do my 5th trip in 7 days. Each time I go, I think to myself, I really could live here. And it gets worse every time I go. I really just do not want to go back home. The food, the culture, the history, the people, the European way of life.........it is just soooooo appealing to me. It is because I am there as a tourist doing tourist things, staying in tourist areas and not exposed to the events, news, and the nitty gritty that get the Europeans all riled up?

The convenience factor does take some getting used to. My one day in Monaco happened to be a Sunday. Bad idea. Also in some places sit-down restaurants are the only dining options at night.

Politeness in the US really varies. Here in the South, some people are polite to the point of being syrupy. Others (mostly newcomers) look at you as if you came from Mars. And let's not forget that in some parts of Europe, it's rude not to greet the shop owner when you walk in (which some Americans find weird). So it can go both ways.

I hate that it's such a long way from Texas. I hate that we must spend hours in a tight plane seat to get there. I hate that my budget doesn't allow me to go every year. I hate that my friends who have never been fail to understand how wonderful it is. I hate that let-down feeling when you return. I hate...oh wait, that's more than 4 already.

Regarding opening/closing times (and days)... in my neighbourhood in Marseille I know of two grocery shops that stay open all night and one that stays open until 10 pm. All three are open on Sundays and are within walking distance. Also I know which pharmacy is on Sunday duty. The same goes for certain restaurants, bars and other businesses. So it's not impossible to get stuff at unusual times.

However I will agree that it is easy to know of these places as a resident, but not so much for a tourist who would probably have to wander past many closed establishments before stumbling across an open one. Also Marseille is a very large city, the same cannot be said for smaller places.

One last thing about working on Sundays (in the case of France): the law is quite restrictive on it if you have employees, in order to guarantee them a family day off (in some cases it is allowed but their wage must be doubled for that day); but if you run your own family business with your spouse and adult children to help you run it (i.e. a small family grocer's) you are free to pick your own hours and days of work. That's why small shops and businesses are often open on a Sunday and larger ones are not.

I just wanted to add a comment about convenience. And I don't want to really use this place to stir the environmental pot, but a short comment:

We should all be wary of conenience because it comes at a cost. Driving off to the grocery store at 2am to buy milk makes for a jug of milk with a very large carbon footprint. Driving anywhere because it is more convenient adds tons of GHG's per vehicle and adds kilograms to our waistlines. We can buy vegetables out of season, because somewhere in the world strawberries are in season. Even running water and easy electricity cost more than we actually pay. I'm no Luddite, but let's manage our zeal for ever greater convenience.

...steps off the soap box.

The thing I find most nutty about that article is that he talks about Europe as a whole. I am not sure how anyone can generalise about so many countries that are so different to each other (even in a jokey way).

I have been to places in Europe that don't conform to his stereotypes and places in America that do! I worked in one town in America where everything closed at 5 and the shops and cafes all sold the same terrible food.

Kelly, please don't feel guilty about loving Europe.

I have family living in Europe and they will never return to live here. There is something about the way they live across there that is different from us. They work to live, not live to work!

Eli--I can well understand the feelings of some of your family members who decided to live across the pond.

And, maybe the "something about the way they live across there" has to do with their social system, philosophy of life, and socialisation.

Kelly--Absolutely no need for guilt feelings on your special preference for Europe, period.

I think we should all go on a big trip to Europe together. We seem to have so much in common! :-)

my only complaint applies to France (a county that I love)...I seldom have dessert, however, if I do order dessert, I like to have it with coffee. I have asked numerous times to have my coffee served with my dessert, only to have it delivered to the table only after I have finished my dessert. I've been told that the French think having coffee with dessert is "wrong" so they don't honor the request. I don't know if this is true or not, perhaps someone can enlighten us further on the subject.

I think it's really disappointing that he sees Europe that way. It's like he's trying to put the "American template" on other cultures. I personally love Europe for all the reasons he mentioned for not liking Europe - I can get REAL CHEESE and not Cheez-It, and the food quality in Europe blows America out of the water. At restaurants we have the table for the night and we are not constantly disturbed by wait staff pushing more food, drinks, desserts, and the check before the meal is even complete. In stores the employees are (for the most part, depending on the store) professional - they care more about helping you get the right product/right fit/whatever than they are about pushing their store chain's credit card down your throat.

The variety of food may be limited, but I like going to a really small grocery in Germany and not being overwhelmed by mass "food products," but getting smaller quantities at greater QUALITY.

I like that the Germans in particular have a sharper distinction between public and private, that they are reserved in public and not asking you all kinds of personal questions, but in private, once you slowly get to know them (and it does take awhile), they have much greater and deeper levels of personal care for their friends and family. They mean what they say and they are not superficial. They just are who they are. I feel I can be myself in Germany, and not the smiling, phony American.

I like that (gasp!) the stores are closed in Germany on Sundays and people have the time to just enjoy time with their friends and families. Yeah, it can be annoying to not have stores open later (it's even annoying for my German sweetheart), but to me it shows that the culture is not willing to sell its soul for mass consumerism.

I think the comments about the supposed superficiality of American friendliness versus European manners are kind of silly. Those of you who are complaining that American shopkeepers don't actually care how you are doing when they ask "how are you doing" - have you ever considered that European shopkeepers don't actually care whether or not you have a good day when they say "bon jour" or "buon giorno"? Friendliness and outgoing nature are part of American culture, especially in the South, where hospitality is an important traditional value. American culture and traditions should not be considered less legitimate than "Old World" culture - those of us who travel need to shake that inferiority complex. I pride myself on my ability to blend in overseas, and I tend to be liberal, so Europeans tend to like my politics, but I am not one of those Americans who is going to sycophantically tell Europeans how much better I think Europe is. If the American cheeriness is not as heartfelt as it seems, who cares? It makes for pleasant interaction, and I believe if you act cheerful long enough, you'll start to feel cheerful, and that cheerfulness can be contagious.

Jen.

Your comments are completely right on!! I heartily share your views when it comes to the smiling phoniness that you so eloquently refered to. And, your blunt comment on German food quality is so true. Thanks for expressing such a view. I wonder how many American beers can pass the German Purity Law.

Even though I am used to it since I was born and raised here, it still irritates me in a restaurant when they bring the check, sometimes as soon as I finished my plate, and without asking if I wanted anything else. and most of all, before I even ask for the check. It is as if the waiter were rushing you out from the premises. In Germany and France this type of behaviour is viewed as an insult. Here they regard it as efficiency.

As a traveller in Europe, especially in Germany when I arrive at a store near closing time and miss it, I am a little annoyed; but, it is good that the store closed at 18:00 or 19:00--it should be that way.

I agree with Mark.

I like almost every European I've ever met. I also love Americans. Plenty of Americans are both friendly and sincere. Different cultures are interesting; none of them are perfect.

I'm with Mark also. Just because someone is smiling, friendly, and cheerful does not mean they are phony. Maybe some people feel phony themselves when they smile because they are not being their true grumpy selves, but I'll smile if I want to!

Fred writes that he hates feeling pushed out of his table at restaurants. Certainly you, not the establishment, should be able to set the pace of your meal. I would like to point out, as a former waitress, that it is because SO many people are always in a hurry, that the servers tend to present checks quickly. Americans are much less likely to linger over dinner. This is not because they are being pushed out-it is just our nature to hurry, hurry, hurry.

If our cultures were not different, would we enjoy our trips as much?

Karen hit it on the head "If our cultures were not so different would we not enjoy our trips?" ~ We should celebrate the differences, experience them with open minds and hearts. That does not mean that we have to adopt all we see, nor does it mean we cannot change at all. Simply be and let be and see that as a positive!