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16 Year Old Daughter Going to Italy

I just read all the posts about traveling in Europe and wondered if anyone could weigh in on this scenario? My 16 yr. old daughter would like to go to Italy in September for 9 days with her high school. There are 15 students going with 4 chaperones. They are going to the town where her Italian teacher grew up and each student will stay with a host family. We hosted a student in Sept/2008 from that same town and it was a great experience. Now that it is time to make the decision for her to go my husband is quite apprehensive about letting her go. He is concerned about saftey issues, supervision at night.etc. Any opinions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks! Mary

Posted by
1317 posts

I agree with BG's comments. This sounds much better than a few recent posters who asked about their daughters going to Italy alone. This will be the experience of a lifetime for her.

Make sure she knows basic information--wear a moneybelt, don't go with strangers, the usual common sense items. It's safe on the streets in Italy a good deal later than in the U.S. I walked around Rome alone at 10pm and there were plenty of people around. Also, school trips are usually pretty strict about supervision.

She'll be 18 and able to move out on her own in 2 years. This will be much safer than that, and she might develop some good life skills as well.

Posted by
515 posts

Nine days in Italy? If it were my child, and there were plenty of trusty chaperones, I would let her go in a heartbeat. When on our trip a couple of summers ago, we saw several student groups, including choirs singing in St. Peter's and other churches. These are experiences and memories of a lifetime.

Posted by
2030 posts

If you have confidence in the chaperones, and your daughter, I would let her go. It should be a fabulous experience.

Posted by
689 posts

Encourage him to look at the facts. The violent crime rate in Italy is a fraction of what it is in the US (you can find stats on the internet)--she's going to be a lot safer there than she is here! It would be terrible shame if he let vague, unfounded fears keep her from what could be the experience of a lifetime.

Posted by
416 posts

I traveled through Austria, Germany and Switzerland with my high school orchestra some 27 years ago with few chaperones/student. I WISH we could have stayed with families while there, but we stayed in hotels. It was like being on one of the big bus tours. :-) At any rate, we all survived the experience (14 days for most, 21 days for those of us who elected to do the extended tour) and had a blast. The ages ranged from 14 to 18 among the students. So here I am at (cough, cough) 45 to say let your daughter go for it. It sounds like she will be well-supervised--far more supervised than my group was--and as someone else pointed out, the crime rate isn't horrible in Europe. I wish I could tag along... (suffering from severe European travel withdrawal)

Posted by
416 posts

Oops! That should read, "fewer chaperones/student."

Posted by
416 posts

I guess it would have made more sense to say more students per chaperone... Tough day at work.

Posted by
1589 posts

4 to 1 ratio? Good odds in your favor, Poppa. Let her go.

Posted by
671 posts

I would let her go. (I am extra-protective, so I would volunteer to chaperone, but that's due to me not the situation.)

Posted by
2773 posts

Europe is a lot safer then the US. You should let her go, it would be a great learning experience for you. Our daugher went to Sweden with a group by the name of CISV for a month when she was 13 and she stayed with a host family, she had a great time.

Posted by
331 posts

Fully Chaperoned, and living with host families? I say YES, Let her go. She will have a Wonderful Time.

Posted by
62 posts

I'd say yes, I went with a school group when I was around 16 to Europe for 10 days and had a blast. There were 3 adults with 20ish kids, and we were all fine. We were not supervised at night but nobody went out and got in trouble, maybe we were too exhausted after traveling all day?

My sister also did a 3 week exchange with a family in England when she was 14 and also had an amazing, safe experience. Host families seem to do a great job taking care of the kids.

Posted by
199 posts

My freshman year in high school we had a german exchange student stay with us for a year. The following year, 2 weeks after my 16th birthday, I went to stay with his family in Frankfurt for a school semster. I went by myself, your daughter will be with chaperones and will only be there for 9 days. As a mother of a 16 year old boy, I would have a hard time sending him. I would be worried and I don't like my kids far a way from me like that, but I would hope to give him the wonderful opportunity that I experienced. I think my parents were jumping for joy when I went. I had, according to my parents, a bit of an attitude problem at 16. My mom use to take students (middle school) to Europe every summer, though they did not stay with a host family, they had rules and curfews etc... Talk with her teacher, find out what rules the will have. I am sure that she will be in safe hands.

Posted by
32171 posts

Mary,

I would definitely let your daughter take part in the trip. It will be an incredbible life experence for her and undoubtedly a crushing disappointment if she was left behind and the rest of the group went.

IMO it would be a good idea for her to have a look at Europe Through The Back Door so that she has some idea on the "differences" she will face in Europe. You may feel more comfortable if she packs a Cell Phone along, so that you can keep in touch if necessary.

With a Chaperones ratio of 4/1 and the fact they'll be staying in private homes, I'd probably make sure the "ground rules" were understood clearly. With everyone staying in different locations rather than at the same Hotel, it will be a bit more difficult to keep track of the group.

Cheers!

Posted by
668 posts

Everyone seems in favour of letting your daughter go. When my son was in grade 9 he went with teh school to the USSR (as it was then) and Finland and my daughter went to Hong Kong and China, each with their school. I do not remember the Student chaperone ratio, but was nowhere as low as 4:1. Nothing serious happenned, though our son was uncomfortable when tehy landed in Moscow, he with a UK passport and a Russian visa issued in Canada, trying to explain the situation to a Russian who spoke little English and a soldier stood nearby with an automatic rifle! His teacher was not allowed to assist him.

Both son & daughter had a great time and had their horizons widened and a love for travel born.

Definitely let her go.

Posted by
5 posts

Thanks so much for all the feedback about whether to let our daughter go to Italy or not. Unfortunately, I don't think there is anything anyone could tell my husband to allay his fears. Although I have concerns and fears myself I think I could let her go. He is not ready and I can appreciate how he feels and our daughter will have to understand if it turns out that she has to pass on the trip. Again, thanks for all the input!!

Posted by
191 posts

It sounds like the decision has already been made, but when I was a 14-year old girl, I did the same thing (except it was France, not Italy) and had a wonderful time. Gave me the travel bug.

Posted by
435 posts

I traveled in Italy as a 16 year old girl. It was absolutely a life changing experience, just wonderful!

I think Italy is safer than the U.S. and what an experience she would have.

Posted by
956 posts

When I was 16 years old, I had a very similar experience but in Germany. We spent about a week with host families, and then traveled for about two more weeks. I think there was about 10-12 students, a teacher and a college-aged chaperone. Myself and another girl did a little sneaking and could have gotten into some trouble. But the chaperones were heavy sleepers and the ratios weren't as good as what you're saying. But on a positive note, that trip was life-changing. I loved Germany so much that I spent a year abroad my junior year of college and now I speak German. (Not fluently as I don't speak it much anymore, but when I go back, a lot of it comes back to me.) If he's not going to let her go, you have to at least let her study abroad in college. I don't know why he wouldn't let her go unless he doesn't trust her. If she's a responsible young lady, then you should have no fears and he's being unreasonable. Like they've said above, the crime rate there isn't like here. And if you don't have problems with her drinking/partying/sex, etc here, then she would probably be fine over there. Unless it's an issue he's having trusting the chaperones that are going. Perhaps there are other children that participated in previous years and maybe he could speak with their parents and find out how it went. If the school has done this trip previously, I doubt they would go year after year if there were safety issues during those trips. This is an experience she will miss and she may never forgive him for it...