The Fun Of Gluten Side Effects, Lactose Intolerance & IBS On Flights

IBS. Lactose intolerance. Gluten side effects. I never imagined these things existed so long ago in the 90’s. But now, it’s a battle I prep for well in advance every time I plan a trip. Of the three socially debilitating conditions I am lactose intolerant and thinking about cutting gluten out of 75% of my diet just to see what happens. I remember back in 2014 on my first ever trip to Ireland the flight there would be long. After a lay over in New York City of which I had a proper Irish lunch with a Guinness somewhere downtown to start off my journey to the Emerald Isle I got on the plane for the final leg of the flight to Shannon Airport. On that flight there were maybe less than 20 people. The stewardess came by and said I could lay across the seats or sit wherever I wanted because there were so many open seats. I took her up on it. I thought it was great. And it was a good thing too because by then my gas just kicked in. Thinking back it was probably from the lunch I had in New York. Needless to say the whole flight there was root’n-toot’n. Thank goodness it was a small flight.

Before flying anywhere I watch what I eat and drink. I time it just right the day before I board a plane. Sometimes two days before. No lactose. No legumes. No carbonation. No red meats. And now no spicy foods. Ugh. It seems I’m only left with water and Jolly Ranchers.
The meals on the flight have gotten a little better since. There are options of main courses if you don’t want to eat something prepared with milk. But then there are the side dishes to contend with of which I always find one or two things I shouldn’t eat because of the ingredients. It’s tough for me when flying.
There’s guaranteed to be seats shoulder to shoulder unless I get first class. And I never fly first class because I’m cheap that way. So now the dread always loom near when I get to an airport. If I’m hungry or thirsty I make sure not to drink any coffee or eat rich foods before I board. I even avoid fruits such as apples and pears. Being constantly mindful of the wrong kinds of food can get frustrating but in the end it helps immensely.
By the time I reach my destination it’s game on. Avoid crowded places. I’m aware of where I’m at. I let my guard down for a while to enjoy some fish’n chips. Possibly have a stout beer to wash it all down. Or if I’m in Tokyo I’ll have a large bowl of yakisoba or ramen. I’m never 110% perfect about my diet. I will have a cup of ice cream once in a great while or put down a rock’n bowl of hearty rich stew when I crave it. Nothings holding me back. No sir. Not even the slithering vibrating sea of people on the Ginza strip or Shibuya or the Royal Mile in Edinburgh. I’m outside. There are many smells. Some scents wisp into your nostrils and then it’s gone and some linger longer than you want it to. At any rate I made to the city where I’ll be staying. Doing more sightseeing. Definitely eating more foods I shouldn’t be consuming. It’s all good because I’m not 35,000ft up in a flying metal tube.