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I don't even want to write this trip report (Poland)

But here I am, and here we go.

SAS flights through CPH to WAW uneventful. We paid for meals that were... OK. It's something to do on a long flight. What I like about SAS is the 2-4-2 configuration, so Mary and I got the 2-seats and imo it was like premium economy. I'm just under 6-feet tall and had ample legroom. Yay.

Observations: The infrastructure was amazing. The interstate highways had no potholes nor even rough patches, as were most of the country roads (cue "Country Roads). Barely any trash whatsoever along the sides of the road. From my observations it was nearly immaculate. Cars would take turns merging into traffic like clockwork. Pedestrians have the right of way at most crosswalks and that was respected by drivers, who also slowed down near puddles of water so as not to splash pedestrians. What? I was impressed. Sidewalks everywhere even between small towns. You go, Poland.

I won't bore you with "this museum was wonderful" and just skip to some personal notes.

Mary and I shared meals, which typically was fried, breaded pork, potatoes, and some type of vegetables. I'm pretty sure it raised my cholesterol 50 points and added some plaque to my arteries, shortening my lifespan, but man it was good. I don't know how people can eat a typical meal by themselves. It's a lot, at least to me.

At our hotel in Old Town Warsaw during breakfast, the cutest little dog ever ran in from the open door to the kitchen, got his treat, and then flashed out of there. Made my morning.

I made the mistake of falling asleep on buses and trains, especially the 2.5 hour train to Krakow. Result? I woke up at 0300 three times. Dummy. So, instead of lying there bemoaning my fate, I went outside for a walk, returned at 0400, and slept fine until 0700. It really ended up being a rather special experience along the not so quiet streets. Lots of stag and hen goings on.

In Krakow during one of these walks, I was approached by a muscular young man who asked if I would like to see some strippers "take their shirts off." I said, "Sure!" Kidding. Actually, I put my hand on his shoulder and said, "I've been very happily married for 41 years, so please excuse me." He laughed a bit and I moved on. Whenever I heard some noise or commotion I walked toward it, but it was exactly what you'd expect--young people partying, etc. I did get the "Who is the old dude?" look.

On at least three occasions I was asked, essentially, what the hell is going on with American politics and violence. I said I was a man without a country in the current political environment, which got me thinking about Lincoln and the "better angels of our nature" that is sadly absent today. I did mention that the country was roughly split 50-50 with each side quite certain the other side was stupid and evil. A recipe for disaster in the event of a spark to set things off.

We took a private tour with a highly regarded guide whose name will go unmentioned. I'm a gentleman. It was a tour of Kazmierz Dolny from Warsaw. The guide took three timeouts to talk to his wife, once for an extended period of time. Then he went to a store that did not interest us at all to buy his wife a gift, taking pictures and texting her, etc. It was a comically bad tour from again, a supposedly prestigious tour guide. On multiple occasions he rather violently swung the van around for no reason I could discern, and then complained about being tired from so many back-to-back tours.

More later after work. I know you can't wait.

Posted by
610 posts

Keep going. Please!
Everyone has bad days, but that tour guide was a doozy. Wow.

Posted by
16367 posts

I put my hand on his shoulder and said, "I've been very happily
married for 41 years...

Mike, I'm sure that made the Hot Wife very happy too. :O)
Loved the report. More, please.

Posted by
3392 posts

Unless the guide apologized profusely and refunded your money at the end of the tour, I think you could mention his name and retain your gentleman status.

I'm always slightly suspicious of the "one and done" folks who post an extremely negative review of a guide, hotel, airline...whatever. But at least one other poster on this forum considering a trip to Poland values your opinion.

Posted by
4426 posts

Unless the guide apologized profusely and refunded your money at the
end of the tour, I think you could mention his name. and retain your
gentleman status.

I was thinking the same. He deserves to be outed as a warning to the rest of us.

Posted by
4554 posts

For what private tours cost, the guide should be excellent. You are doing the other tour guides in Warsaw a disservice by not giving this person's name. Not knowing who to avoid, I would probably avoid them all.

Posted by
6464 posts

Perhaps Big Mike would agree to disclose the guides name in a Private Message, to people who did need to know.

Thanks for the report, Mike. I'm looking forward to more.

Posted by
1035 posts

Mary and I shared meals, which typically was fried, breaded pork, potatoes, and some type of vegetable.

I assume this was due to choice - it should not be inferred that pork kotlet is one of the few choices available in Poland. In fact, it would be entirely possible to visit major cities in Poland and never order traditional Polish food.

Over a two week visit, I ordered pierogi just once. On the other hand, I ordered Zurek several times. Italian, Thai, Vietnamese, Indian & Mexican cuisine were all available. There are a number of upscale steak houses in Krakow. Excellent seafood in Gdansk. There is also contemporary Polish cooking.

I did have an excellent yet inexpensive pork kotlet at Bar Grodzki in Krakow.

Posted by
209 posts

Mike, I'm really enjoying your trip report. Eager to read more.

I don't consider Mike a "one and done" poster as he has posted over 2,500 times.

Traveler Girl

Posted by
944 posts

It's quite possible to eat Vietnamese, Italian and Mexican food in Poland (along with that of many other nationalities). The question is: Why? Polish food is just so G-D tasty.

I love to read Big Mike's posts. I'm thinking his trip to Poland isn't the first time he's eaten pierogies.

Posted by
3104 posts

EP, if someone is looking at a private tour guide from Warsaw they can PM me, but I'm just not comfortable posting that here.

At the risk of redundancy, I found Poland's infrastructure and cleanliness far superior than what we generally have in America. As you can probably tell I still can't get over it. More pride in their country?

Another thing that struck me was the lack of homeless people. During my 0300 walks on three separate nights through the old towns of Warsaw and Krakow, I counted two people sleeping on benches, but I suspect they had to much to drink as I didn't notice much in the way of personal belongings. Maybe one of you could weigh in on why that is. Cultural differences? Law enforcement not allowing it?

During our 8-hour layover at CPH we took a walking tour. Copenhagen in some ways reminded us of Amsterdam with the canals and cyclists. I mean cyclists by the hundreds, maybe thousands. Parents had kids in little trailers being pulled behind them. No wonder there was a quite noticeable lack of obesity compared to the U.S. Even in the pouring rain they were still out there. The tour guide said taxes on cars (new and used?) was 180 percent. Yes, I'd ride a bike, too. With the trailers you could get groceries, etc., and transport the kids around town.

At our local Wal Mart there are a lot of people in those scooters doing their shopping. I saw none at a large, Target-like store near the Chopin Airport, we twice ate at Burger King, I'm embarrassed to admit. There just just wasn't much else around our hotel. Yes, it's the same as what you'd get in the States. And yeah they have KFC, Starbucks, Subway, and so forth.

Those I spoke with about geopolitics were still concerned about the security of Poland for obvious reasons. They site promises made to them during the late 1930s that were, in their minds, unfulfilled, leaving them at the mercy of Germany, and then Russia. I reminded them that 10,000 American troops plus other NATO forces were stationed in Poland, and it would be insane for Putin to even consider invading a country that is far more militarily robust than Ukraine, but they were rather skeptical.

One Polish fellow witnessed the mobilization of tanks and assorted military vehicles soon after Russia invaded Ukraine, and said it gave him goosebumps of joy to know that Poland was not alone.

All I will say about Auschwitz-Birkenau is the faces of the victims has stayed with me, particularly that of a lovely little girl holding her mother's hand, and knowing their fate. I made it a point to look into as many of the eyes of those pictured as possible. I don't know why. Survivors have said the reality of the camps was worse that is depicted in the movies. How can that be, I wondered? Worse?

My unsolicited advice is to bring an N or KN-95 mask for the flights. We had a couple behind us coughing and so forth, and I think the masks kept us from getting sick, or so I'd like to think. Hardly anyone else wore a mask except for a couple sitting directly across from the sick people. Fancy that.

One last thing: I found it hard to differentiate the dress and appearance of Poles (and maybe Europeans in general) from Americans, with the possible exception of team baseball caps. I mean, you can notice unique Slavic facial characteristics like you would see in Scandinavian countries. We all more or less dress the same nowadays, which is sort of a disappointment to me as I'm old enough to remember distinct differences from days gone by, particularly in Bavaria. Vive la difference? Not so much any more.

Posted by
3104 posts

Thank you for your replies.

Kathy, as I understand it the "stripper bars" are some sort of scam where they lure in unsuspecting men, and then extort them for ridiculous amounts of money. There is also an opportunity--from what I was told--to invite the ladies back to your hotel room or home, although hotels generally frown on this type of behavior.

edit: OK, enough culture. Would like to see the Oasis reunion tour in the UK, but those tickets could make Taylor Swift shows look cheap. Now taking over/under bets on how many shows before Noel and Liam exchange punches.

Posted by
7779 posts

BigMike, thank you so much for your report, even though you didn’t want to write it. Is it regrets about eating such tasty food. revealing your waking up at 3AM part, dread about their political and safety concerns, or what? We’re going to Poland this coming April, our first time, and it’s helpful … even if the stripper bar wouldn’t be part of the plan.

Was the middle of the night a particularly enjoyable time to view the city, not just because your sleep schedule had been altered? I’ll PM you to ask for the guide’s name, so we don’t wind up with a “tour” with him. Thank you, again, for taking the time to make a trip report.

Posted by
7052 posts

At the risk of redundancy, I found Poland's infrastructure and
cleanliness far superior than what we generally have in America. As
you can probably tell I still can't get over it. More pride in their
country?

Poland has been the recipient of much investment from the EU and Germany. There is certainly more pride since Communist times, but the key is really $$$. I don't know if you took the Warsaw metro, but it's fairly new and very clean (same with new trams and buses)

Re: homelessness, it's similar to Asia (i.e. cultural). Families take care of family members (they are used to sharing small/er spaces with others). Only hardcore alcoholics (or very extreme cases) would be out on the street, and there are no significant drug/ opioid/ fentynyl/ mental health issues there that drive what you see in the US among the homeless population.

Posted by
3104 posts

Cyn, I'd guess it was a rather up and down trip and I didn't really want to relive some of it by writing a review.

Yes, it was a completely different vibe walking at night with only a tiny fraction of the daytime crowds. I'd highly recommend it if you're so inclined. I mean, it was a far better experience than lying in the bed awake for an hour, and I believe the walk helped me sleep better afterwards. It was only an hour.

Agnes, thank you for the education. Really appreciate those insights. What did Bob Dylan say? Money doesn't talk, it screams.

Posted by
8827 posts

I put my hand on his shoulder and said, "I've been very happily
married for 41 years...

BMWBGV, forgive my sense of humor for noting that your answer could still be interpreted in either way.

We noted the dominance of pork in Poland, Germany, etc., as there not being the more land-intensive cattle industry we have in the US.

Posted by
6464 posts

We were in Poland just a few months ago, for the Rick Steves tour, and enjoyed it very much.

Big Mike is dead on about the cleanliness of the cities, and what seemed to be a feeling of pride and optimism.

However we did note a number of beggars, a couple of whom we thought might be homeless, especially in Gdańsk and Warsaw. That rather surprised me.

And the food is indeed incredible. We love Polish food, having lived there for a while many years ago, so were pleased to find we could still get some of the simpler, homier dishes. We also found outstanding Italian food, in Gdańsk, Torun, and Warsaw.

Posted by
14767 posts

I fully enjoyed my 3 big trips to Poland in the early 21st century, covering Warsaw, Krakow, Gdansk, Torun, Malbork, Chelmo, talking the people we encountered, be that in English, French (the mrs did that), and German...very friendly, lovely people and approachable . The minor afternoon trips crossing the border towns across the other side of the Oder were interesting, ie from Frankfurt an der Oder or Küstrin-Kietze

No problems sleeping on the trains day or night. After 20 years the present train are presumably far superior than those in operation in 2001 and 2003.

We had with the exception of a meal in a Chinese restaurant in Krakow the lunches and dinners in Polish restaurants, mostly ordering pork in some fashion, the borsch was good to great everywhere.