first time solo at 63

I am the same age and last October I went to Sicily as a solo traveler. It was great. I put down that I would be willing to have a roommate, but their were no other solo females so I had a room by myself. There were no problems with my rooms. A couple of times, I did things by myself in our free time, but it was because I chose to do so. Otherwise, I was always asked to join different groups when we went exploring or went to eat. I always felt included and everyone looked out for each other.

mbz

Hello jlykins. I'm sorry to read of your loss.
While you would not be traveling alone on a tour, I believe a RS tour would be ideal for a first trip - it certainly was for us. I was somewhat overwhelmed at the idea of trying to arrange all of the trip details on my own for our first trip and we thoroughly enjoyed the RS 21 day trip through Europe. There were several singles on our tour, mostly female, and everyone had a great time together. That RS trip was not an "easy tour" physically but it was an easy tour in that we got to travel so many places and see so many beautiful things. Rooms, transportation, tours, and most meals were arranged for us yet we also had some free time to do/see extra things. On any tour you can always opt out of doing something if it is too much for you.

I would think that any of the city tours would be a very nice (but short) introduction. Some people even arrange two or more tours back to back to make the trip more cost effective. If you look at the tour descriptions there is an activity level note at the top right of each tour page.

First of all, let me give you my sincere condolences. I am also a widow and my heart goes out to you.

I find that I don't really enjoy traveling solo, but I know others that really do. For me 1/2 of the travel experience seems to be about sharing it with others. I have been fortunate in that my sister is willing to travel with me and so I currently have someone to "share" with. When I do travel alone for short trips, I end up sending my kids about 5-6 emails or pictures a day to share the experience. Fortunately, they don't seem to mind too much.

I think the Rick Steves Tours would be a great way to proceed with your first big overseas trip in your new situation. You will have the opportunity to "ease" into traveling as a solo person, but still have company around to share experiences with. I suggest you do some short independent domestic solo trips to see if this form of travel is a good match for you. There are those that thrive on independent solo travel and you may be one of them.

I think you will also be surprised that certain locations that you either went to with your husband or wanted to go to with him, may impact you emotionally in a stronger way than you would predict. I can remember completely falling apart in grief on a beautiful hike in Switzerland, just because I knew how much my husband would have loved it and I so wished he were there. I still get those surprise moments when the grief pushes forward and all of my usual ways of dealing with it fail. Expect that this could happen on your trips and is very normal.

I'm glad that you are learning how to live going forward and learning new ways to travel.

First, I am very sorry for your loss. I have gone on 8 Rs tours as a single traveler. While I am a single traveler, I never felt like I was traveling alone. RS tour members are a very friendly and welcoming group of people. Usually there were several other single travelers .The only time I was alone was when I wanted to be.

That being said, I would look at the countries where there are tours offered and narrow down to which one interests you. Personnely I love France. You might want to look at a City tour as they are shorter and have a lot of things to do. My favorite tours have been Eastern a France and the Best of Switzerland.

So sorry for your loss. I hope you will go on a tour as a solo. I have been on 5 tours and only our last BOE14 had no solos. I have always enjoyed the solos on our tour. We would try to include them in our free time too. If you call the office they are usually very helpful in telling you if other solos have currently signed up. They were helpful when I was asking if other teens were on our trip.

Hope you go

I am very sorry for your loss. I think that it is an excellent idea not to make any major lifestyle decisions until you are truly ready. I also think that a RS tour is a wonderful way to do something enjoyable for yourself. I think going solo is great and many women do it. I have been on 14 RS tours, mostly solo. There are at least a few others or more solo travelers, mainly women on the tours. It is a great way to see things as a solo traveler but still be in a setting with other people and a guide that can help you. You are right, a tour would be a great introduction into solo travel and traveling to places you would not really be able to get around on your own.

Go and enjoy yourself. The hardest decision will be to choose which tour!

A warm welcome to the forums, jlykins00, and my sincere condolences as well.

As you've already seen from responses so far, the RS community is a great group! While I've never taken a tour (as did you and your spouse, my husband and I travel independently) I've no doubt that you'd find yourself amongst friendly, interesting and inclusive folks on ANY of the tours which grab you. If I was in your situation, I wouldn't hesitate to "dip my toes" into one of them to see if they suit a new lifestyle.

Why not spend some time browsing the forum threads to see how people talk about their experiences? Trip reports are a good place to start but all-in-all, I think the approachable tone of ANY of the forums will help you formulate a sense of how comfortable you can expect to feel on your chosen adventure. Really, "Our Gang" is ready to welcome you with open arms and to help any way they can. :O)

Traveling as a solo on a tour, and traveling as a solo without a tour, are two different things. You may find that you like both, dislike both, or like one but not the other. The only way to find out is to try them - when you are ready, and to a place that interests you.

I agree that a shorter tour would be good, in case you find you don't like it. And for a solo trip on your own, I'd start with a major city in North America; these are easy to do on your own, and solo people don't stand out. New York, Chicago, New Orleans, DC, San Francisco, Montreal...and many more, would all work well.

Traveling as a solo on a tour, and traveling as a solo without a tour, are two different things. You may find that you like both, dislike both, or like one but not the other. The only way to find out is to try them - when you are ready, and to a place that interests you.

This.

I'd say a tour (RS or other) would be a good bridge to solo travel where it's just you in Europe or wherever. You'll have free time on a RS tour that you can spend alone or perhaps you'd like to join up with other people on the tour for lunch or a walk. You'll have company on the nites with group dinners, and up to you whether to join others on the other nites (in my experience people usually form small groups on the on-your-own nites so you won't be a 3rd wheel).

I was widowed in 1998 when I was only 47. Those first couple years were challenging as I figured out what I wanted in my new life while the grief was so fresh. It' s wise to take it slow, but I found that I sometimes surprised myself by trying things that I never considered while my husband was alive.

About 10 years ago, I concluded that, if I waited around for someone to travel with, I might never go anywhere! Since then, I have traveled a great deal in Europe and Asia with a couple different tour organizations, a volunteer organization, private guides, and independently. I've enjoyed all these types of travel and have learned a lot about my personal preferences which has helped me successfully plan the next adventure.

I have gone on three RS tours - Istanbul, Prague/Budapest, and Bulgaria - and loved them all. Each of them had a nice mix of couples and solos, with a fairly large range of ages. The solos were mostly women ( but TWO men in Bulgaria!). Some were single, divorced, widowed, but a fair number were married to men who didn't like to travel (lol). I found that most everyone (both solos and couples) on these trips were friendly, and it was easy to find someone to be with during free time, on the bus, to share a meal, and so on. On the other hand, sometimes I just wanted to be alone, and people respected that too. RS tours have a nice balance of group tours/meals, and free time/meals on your own. So you don't feel like you are with a big group ALL the time.

In Istanbul, I let RS give me a roommate. It was only 6 nights and worked out fine. However, most of the time I prefer my own space, so I usually pay the single supplement.

I love that RS handles all the logistics of travel so I can enjoy the trip with minimal stress. However, I also enjoy some independent travel, so I always add days at the beginning and end of the trip, either in the tour cities or elsewhere (such as a layover city). This might be an idea that would work for you. Pick a RS tour that appeals to you and add a couple days of true solo travel.

I wish you the best.

I am sorry for your loss. I have been on RS Tours that have included singles, both men and women. Since you state you want an easy introduction, I would suggest you try the week long city tours. You will be in the same hotel for the entire week. You could unpack and settle in, making it your personal space. That is if you choose to pay for a single supplement. Another alternative, try out one of the England, Scotland or Ireland tours. This would rule out the language barrier, well sort of. ;)

I am sorry for your loss and it is a challenge to know what to do regarding solo traveling. My husband is no longer able to travel due to medical reasons. We had been planning a trip to Ireland this year but when it was apparent he could not make this trip I decided to try and go by myself as that is what he wanted me to do. I signed up for an 8 day RS tour in August and then decided to stay in Dublin a week longer to see if I would enjoy sightseeing by myself. My daughter's schedule changed and she was able to join me for the tour but not the additional week. Mostly, I wanted to see if I would like a tour and then decide if I would take more in the future. I think a tour would be an easy introduction and I hope you try one.

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. All my 7 RS tours have been solo. I started with the Paris city tour since it was short and I thought it would be a good start. Well, I was hooked! I have had roommates on some of my tours but found out that I needed space at night so now I book the solo supplement. I have never felt lonely on any of my trips because most of the tour members are so friendly and want to include me in their dinners and extra activities. I highly recommend it!

It's difficult but you will reinvent your life in time. I believe RS tours might be ideal for you. We were a rarity I'm sure - a retired married male couple but we found everyone warm and accepting, especially the tour guide. We had a 30-something married couple, several single 30-something professional women traveling with their mothers, a group of single 50-something women who were work comrades, a number of retired couples and one 50 year old married man who was traveling alone because his wife hated travel. We found that the single women gravitated to us and we often dined together during the free hours and visited sites together. It's a great way to socialize as much or as little as you like. Sometimes we just went on our way when we wanted alone time. I would recommend a best of Paris tour.

Hi jly, sorry for your loss. I think a RS tour would be a great way for you to "test drive" touring Europe. I like the small groups and learning travel skills so you can (if you choose) travel on your own at some point. If there's a place you've been dreaming of all your life (i.e. Paris, London, Rome), I'd go there first. The advice I got the first time I did a RS tour solo was to pick a place I really wanted to visit. If the tour wasn't what I had hoped for, at least I'd be where I wanted to be. That first tour did work out (Paris in 7 Days) and I've done 8 RS tours to date.

Hi. I have taken 9 RS tours solo. I pay the single supplement as I have found I need and value my space at the end of the day. I am a lifelong singleton and comfortable being on my own. That said, I really value having travel companions. Someone to chat with and share experiences. Most of my friends are not as hooked on Europe as I am and prefer alternate vacation locations. So, I travel solo with RS tours and have experienced a comfortable mix of being on my own and with others. I do start or end a tour with a few days on my own. While I love making and researching travel plans, sometimes by the day the tour starts, I suddenly feel like the real vacation has started. I can kick back and relax. All details have been taken care of. Usually, I have some kind of theme going on, for instance, lately I have been trying to research and identify if and where the Way of St. James has intersected with our tour itinerary. I can attend to that and not have to focus on travel connections, etc.

Since I habitually fly BA, I start and stop in London. I have never been at a loss on how to fill up a few days on my own. In terms of which tour to recommend? Well, of course it depends on your likes and dislikes. I think I would recommend the Venice, Florence, Rome as a good starter tour since it gives three days in each location but also introduces you to what the bus travel will be like. My current favorite is MyWay Alpine. That would definitely give you less structure.

Best, Debbie

Years ago when I took my first RS tour I wasn't sure if I was going to enjoy it. I'd done some independent travel up to then and enjoyed the freedom. I dipped my toe in by signing up for the weeklong Rome tour. I figured it's relatively short at a week and had a fair amount of free time. A few days in I was hooked and have been taking them since. It's a much richer experience having expert local guides explain the history, art, culture and knit it all together in a cohesive and coherent way.

So if you're unsure about group travel then a city tour might be a good option. City tours don't have much if any bus time so it leaves you when plenty of free time.

And of course my condolences on your loss.

Well, I will chime in with the rest of the Rikniks and say GO!

I've done 8 RS tours, 5 solo (3 with my brother and SIL). I am confident enough in travel now that I ~could~ go on my own, and usually do hook on some independent travel to a RS tour. I choose to do the RS tours because I love the itineraries, the amazing guides and the very interesting group of people to travel with. I do get the single supplement because I just need some quiet time on my own.

I would not necessarily do a City tour first of all UNLESS there is a city that just calls to you. I did the Paris tour and did not find the same group spirit with the week long city tour as in the longer tours I've done that required some bus time. I think the bus experience allows for more bonding time - not necessarily chatting on the bus but getting off and on, bathroom stops, food breaks, scenery breaks, etc. You look around to make sure everyone else is there, etc. On the city tour I did people mostly went off on their own. That was fine with me as that was my intention but I'm not sure others were getting together for dinner on the non-group meal nights, etc. Other people may have had different experiences with their City tours and group members.

My favorite tour was the 21 Best of Europe but I have enjoyed all of them. All had solo women travelers.

For a first tour, it kind of depends on what interests you. I would order the 2018 tour book so you can leaf thru it. Yes, all that is on line but holding it and flipping back and forth is wonderful. I would suggest the Heart of Italy if you want a shorter but dynamic tour. If France is of interest, I would consider the Paris and Heart of France tour. It has a lot of different time frames and was wonderful. Consider also Best of Engand if another language is intimidating!

As a back up, I also do Road Scholar tours if they provide an itinerary Rick does not cover. As a rule I find the Road Scholar travelers to be slightly more needy. They meet you at the airport and handle luggage to and from the bus. They do not have a No Grumps policy which I really think makes a difference! However, I did an excellent trip to Brittany and Normandy in May and am doing a tour to Cornwall in October. The Brittany trip was my 8th with them as well.

I am so sorry about the loss of your husband. I admire you for looking after YOUR needs and I think it is splendid you are looking to stretch your wings with a Rick tour!

Go ahead and take Venice, Florence, Rome. Not too many stops but enough bus time to see the things that go on. Great tour but make sure you have some mosquito spray in Venice, especially at night if you leave the window open.

The only person that you have to make happy is yourself. Go for it!

I'm with others who've suggested taking one of the shorter tours (7-10 days) to see how you like it. If you can afford it, I'd suggest paying the single supplement. You don't know how you'll be feeling or what thoughts/emotions you'll want to process at the end of the day and that way you won't have to worry about a roommate with whom you may or may not click.

I think you will enjoy the RS tour experience. Good thoughts and well wishes to you!

Wow. I am so touched by the suggestions and well wishes from the RS community! Your responses have given me motivation and courage to step into the world of solo travel. Looks like these tours attract pretty awesome people. Thank you. Thinking I'll start with Paris. Time to hit the treadmill!

Jlykins00, I too am so sorry for your loss.

I once told my husband that if he died I would spend the next 6 weeks huddled in a corner, whimpering. He said: "Yes, and then you're going to get up and get on the phone to Rick Steves."

So go for it. Paris is wonderful, and the RS tour teaches you how to travel on your own (metro pass, museum card) while covering many of the main sights - Notre Dame, Latin Quarter, Sainte-Chapelle, the Louvre. There's plenty of free time, and the folks on RS tours tend to be very congenial.

Please let us know how you're doing.

It sounds like you've received a lot of great advice from seasoned RS travelers and have made your decision! My wife & I took our very first RS tour to Paris in 2015 (and LOVED it!). We are excited to embark on our second RS tour to London this fall. I will offer my insight as a first time RS participant in hopes that it helps:
1~Our RS group was absolutely wonderful. Everyone really made a diligent effort to get to know each other. Everyone would eat breakfast and group meals with different people. There was a solo traveler in our group, and he was just in the mix with everyone else. I think you will find a RS tour very welcoming.
2~When we broke up from our large group, we ALWAYS just broke into smaller groups of 4-7 (never just the two of us). Whether it was touring Notre Dame or walking (and I do mean A LOT of walking!) in the gardens at Versailles, we'd seek out people that we wanted to get to know better.
3~When we had actual free time or meals on our own, again we ALWAYS informally did things with others from our RS group. For example, when we were in Montmartre and had finished the group portion of our day, my wife and I indicated that we were interested in visiting the Artists Square in Montmartre, and we ended up with a group of 6 of us. This was our small group for the afternoon. We did our sightseeing and had lunch together. As we were leaving Montmartre to make our way back to our hotel, we decided to be adventurouus and instead walking east to the nearest metro station, we walked south so we could walk by the Moulin Rouge! If it was just my wife and me, I'm not sure we would have done this!
4~If you enjoy "researching" things to do, I would really encourage you to map out your itinerary, know when you MAY have some free time, and see what you might want to do in that area. That is how I knew just how close we were to the Moulin Rouge. If you prefer to just wing-it, disregard this suggestion!
5~If part of traveling independently that you liked was being in charge & knowing exactly where you are going, I'd suggest getting a map app for your phone. I downloaded Ulmon Paris (I think less than $5). Prior to going, I marked where our hotel was and dropped pins for the major sites we would be seeing. I LOVED letting our tour guide making all the arrangements and getting us to where we needed to be. I just liked orientating myself to a new city and having a sense of knowing where I am at!
6~If there are things you REALLY want to do but are not on the RS itinerary, I'd suggest you consider adding a day to two to the end of your trip. If you stay at the same hotel, you'll be well orientated to the metro system and can strike out on your own. For us, it was visiting Monet's gardens in Giverny & Normandy. We did a day tour for each. I know this isn't exactly "independent," but we did have to strike out on our own! My point is that if you think doing a tour may be too limiting, adding on to the end (you'll know your surroundings), can let you have the best of both worlds!
Good luck!

I have planned my very first solo tour with RS in October to Italy. I am looking forward to it but also hoping that I will not be isolated and alone throughout the trip. Hearing all the great responses on this site makes me feel comforted and excited to make new friends while I visit new places!

Sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how difficult this will be for you.

I agree with Pam, that I think you should do a bus-based tour for your first tour. I have taken both kinds (city; bus) as a solo traveler and I don't think there are nearly as many opportunities to build camaraderie on a city tour. And given your situation, that will likely be something you will be looking for. Also, I'm not sure that choosing Paris for a whole week may be a good opinion, simply based on the fact that it is considered one of the most romantic places on Earth. Any trip without your spouse will no doubt be difficult, but those feelings may be exaggerated by the fact that you are in Paris of all places. I don't discount going there, but you may want to consider a trip where it's part of the itinerary. Paris and The Heart of France may be a good option for you. You can visit Paris, try out the bus situation, and it's a relatively short tour. All of these factors may make it a good option. Good Luck with your decision.

Hello kindred soul. I just want to join in the group love for you, and your brave inquiry about a tour. I lost my hubby a little over a year ago (I was 52). Like you, we always travelled independently. I decided in my 9th month of widowhood that I would venture out on a Rick Steves tour. I took the Best of Ireland in 14 days. Such a beautiful country, with soulful music, and an amazing tour experience filled me up with new good memories. I did have some difficult times: most significantly, when I first discovered I was one of the only solo travellers, in a group with all couples! That hurt my heart ... but only until I got to know everyone. Then I realized we are all taking separate life journeys on earth. Their paths crossed mine, and enriched my life for a short time on the road. I missed my hubby often, sometimes with a deep ache and wistfulness, but I also had many mental reprieves where I was fully immersed in the landscape, or the fun! Just last night, I signed up for my second Rick Steves tour. I am going to spend Christmas in Rome, and fill up all the loneliness I might otherwise feel, with more new experiences and perhaps, more new friends. I like to think my hubby is looking down at me and smiling at my adventures. I hope whatever you decide, you will learn something about yourself, and about this beautiful planet we live on. Safe and happy travels to you!

jly,

I'm also in my '60s and have travelled both solo and on RS tours (sometimes both on the same trip). To be succinct, my advice would be - GO FOR IT!!! It will be a new experience for sure, but I don't think you'll regret it. More importantly you'll probably learn some travel skills that will help you travel independently on future trips.

The RS groups are very inclusive with single travellers, and everyone gets along (the tours have a "no grumps" policy). You can participate in every activity and day trip, or spend some time touring on your own. You'll have a choice of bunking with another traveller of the same gender (possibly more than one during a tour), or paying an extra charge for a single supplement which gets you your own room. You'll learn a lot about the history and culture of the countries you visit, and enjoy some fantastic meals on the tours.

Your profile doesn't indicate where you're located, but one other point to mention is that RS holds a huge tour event every year, which occurs about mid-January in Seattle (Edmonds). Included in that event are Test Drive A Tour Guide sessions, where you can hear a presentation on whatever tour you're considering, and speak with the guides who lead those tours. If you're able to make it to Seattle, I'd highly recommend attending the event.

Happy travels!

Karin, thank you for your beautiful response. Bless you, and have a wonderful trip to Rome.

First of all, I am very sorry for your loss. It's good you are not making a lot of changes until time has passed/the time is right. Regarding solo travel, I think a tour is a good way to experience travel in your new circumstances. Over the years, my husband & I have done many group land tours, in addition to lots of ocean & river cruises. In terms of land tours, I would recommend Rick Steves or Tauck. Our experience on seven Rick Steves tours is that all/most participants are welcoming, interesting & easy to get along with. I think you will be comfortable, even if you are the only solo traveler in the group. If you are prepared to pay high end prices (for a high end experience), I recommend Tauck tours. We have met several women traveling alone who prefer Tauck to any other company (women who have done 35 or more Tauck tours). They prefer Tauck because they feel safe, accommodations are top-notch & everything is taken care of. While Rick Steves covers Europe & chooses primarily small or family owned hotels, Tauck travels the world & usually includes 5 star, often well known brand hotels & more exotic meals (depending on the itinerary). My suggestion is to start with Rick Steves (well priced, good value, easily accessible locations in Europe, authentic/non-touristy meals). Then, if/when you are ready to venture to more exotic travels, consider Tauck (expensive, but not overpriced for the quality of the experience). I like both companies because groups are not too large, your regular guide & local guides are outstanding, buses are comfortable & you are not required to wear touristy name tags. I loved all our Rick Steves tours, so it's hard to pick a favorite. If you have three weeks, I would start with the Best of Europe in 21 days. It's a nice balance of towns & major cities. If you already like Italy, but have never been to Sicily, this is a good choice for venturing into a slightly more exotic location, while staying in Europe. We also travel extensively on Holland America cruise line...a great way to travel the world, while staying in a floating hotel. HAL is very welcoming to solo travelers (both widowed, single, or people traveling without their spouses). They do short cruises (one week), as well as much longer Grand Voyages (2 - 4 months). All three of these companies are appropriate for your age group. You won't be the oldest or youngest, although with HAL, you might be among the younger travelers on many itineraries, as they cater to a very well-traveled audience of repeat customers, who have the time/money to take long cruises. Best wishes & happy travels!

I see all of the great responses to traveling solo. My husband died when I was 31 and after raising my two girls decided I needed to get going on the travel....no Mr Right seemed to come along. I have now traveled 25% of the world, mostly solo and I have had a wonderful experience. My first solo trip was to Turkey, hotels picked from RS book. I did not do a tour. I had the time of my life!!! The wonderful young men from the hotel took turns taking me out to local places every night. I have made wonderful friends while traveling the world and more importantly, it gave me confidence that I could do anything. I am leaving for Germany in 5 weeks, solo.

I did a tour of Thailand and met another wonderful woman on that trip that we did Egypt together. I know it is scary in the beginning. I remember the airplane door shutting in Chicago as we took off for Istanbul wondering what have I done????? I met a wonderful man from Amsterdam on my first trip to Turkey that we went to Greece and Italy together the following year. I am so hooked on travel and adventure now.....I do two trips a year! Go for it!!!

As one who has traveled solo on many RS tours I can assure you that while you can and will have time to yourself, you will not be traveling alone.

If you want to dip your toes in, well, almost any tour would be good, but I suggest Holland and Belgium. Just about everybody speaks English, the countries are fascinating, lots of great small cities with canals, cobblestones and very interesting buildings, and there is minimal bus time since they are small countries. IMHO, it is a one of the RS 'hidden gem' tours.