I will be the contrarian here because I disagree with the posters who do not like Malaga. I agree with your plan to spend 3 nights in Malaga. We spent 2 nights there and wished we had a 3rd night. Rick Steves doesn't give any time or credit to Malaga. He gives it one page in his book and treats it primarily as a transportation hub. We really, really liked Malaga and think it's an under-rated city.
Some highlights of Malaga:
The vibrant and beautiful city center with gorgeous architecture, nice stores, and lots of cafes and restaurants.
Malaga Cathedral: beautiful with a mix of styles (Renaissance, Gothic and Baroque)
Atarazanas Market located in a 19th century iron building
Picasso Museum and there are tons of other art museums
Alcazaba and Castillo de Gibralfaro. The Alcazaba is a Moorish fortress on a hilltop. Slowly walk to the top and enjoy towers, pathways, gateways, Roman columns, patios with fountains and lush greenery with exotic flowers. And the views of the port and the Mediterranean are stunning!!! This was one of our highlights.
Walk along the Promenade by the port and enjoy drinks overlooking the harbor.
I think Malaga will be a wonderful place to get over jet lag with its coastal ambiance.
Granada - I think 3 nights will be enough.
Cordoba - I agree with acraven that you should take one night from Granada (so 3 nights instead of 4) and add it to Cordoba. Spend 2 nights in Cordoba. The Mezquita is magnificent, but there is a lot more to Cordoba than the Mezquita. Such as the Alcazar, Palacios de Viana, Mercado Victoria, leisurely explore the Juderia, Roman Bridge, and more. And Cordoba is so special and charming at night when the daytrippers have left and the city is illuminated.
Sevilla - 5 nights is good with a day trip to Ronda
Madrid - 5 or 6 nights is good. Haven't been to the day trip places you mention.
Toledo - definitely spend 1 or 2 nights in Toledo. So if you spend 5 nights in Madrid, take one night and add it to Toledo. DO NOT Visit Toledo as a day trip. As with Cordoba, Toledo is so charming at night when the tour buses have left and the city is illuminated. If we saw Toledo as a day trip, I think my opinion would have been "what's the big deal?"
Haven't been to Zaragoza.
Barcelona - I would spend 6 nights in Barcelona.
And spend 2 nights in Girona. You can take the train there. Girona is a medieval walled city. You can walk the walls. If you were willing to rent a car, I would suggest 5 nights in Barcelona with a 3-night car trip to Girona (2 nights) and Cadaques (1 night). Cadaques is located on the Mediterranean and is lovely. Looks like a Greek village. Dali's home is nearby in Port Lligat. I don't know if it's possible to take public transportation to Cadaques so you might need to rent a car if this interests you.