Sensitive question: bathing

Sure is. Don't know why but can say getting into a closed room with some of the guys I work with is not fun. Add in the fact that they'll wear the same clothes for a week at a time and they don't use deodarant and it's pretty rough. Now, that's not all Italians but it's certainly more common than what you expect in the US.

The U.S. used to be in the same boat. One of the first Japanese visitors to America in the 1860's remarked that all the Americans he met were surprised that he wanted to bathe every day.

Okay, but Will, really, that was back when you had to pump the water, carry it in to the kitchen and boil it on the wood stove, then pour it into the tin bath. We're talking about NOW, when everyone has bathrooms with hot and cold running water. Daily showers are certainly the norm in my country. Even with all our water shortage problems, no one suggests fewer showers, just shorter ones. So I'm in the "don't understand the European mindset on this one" camp.

Water is expensive. Heating water is expensive. Washing towels is time consuming and expensive. And the customs of fewer baths/showers have persisted. Daily showers/baths are just not as common in much of Europe.

I have to disagree with that somewhat. We're a family of four (yes, daily showers) and average less than 40 euro a month for water. As far as doing laundry.......yeah, it can be time consuming.

'Daily showers/baths are just not as common in much of Europe.' Here we go again. Europe is not a homogeneous mass of humanity. How can anyone who doesn't live there know what everybody does? How can anybody that lives there even know what everybody else does? Whycome the stores sell towels? Whycome you see towels on clotheslines? Whycome the stores sell soap? Whycome when you go in somebody's house, it doesn't smell like dirty sneakers? Whycome none of my friends stink? How big is the sampling on which the statement is based? How do you introduce the question, anyway? Excuse me sir/madam (as the case may be), but you smell a bit musty/rank (pick one) - - did you take a bath this week/today/last year (pick one) ?

Laura, we have spent several weeks in Italy the last ten years, and we've never experienced any problem with bad hygiene. As someone who routinely takes a couple of showers a day while in Italy during warm weather, I would have noticed.

Well, I have stayed in the homes of European families on several occasions, and my experience, with these particular families, was that they did not shower every single day, as I believe most of my friends and I do....
trying not to generalize too much, but there are cultural habits that are generally the norm...

My experience after traveling in Italy for 31 years is that it depends. Some of my family there bathe every few days and some bathe more frequently. Years ago we stayed with my cousin Guiseppe and they were upset that we showered every day and used a lot of there cistern water. Now when we go to Calabria we stay in a hotel and go visit everyone. We have friends in other parts of Italy and this is not an issue., so my response is still depends. Buon viaggio,

Let's not forget that it is possible to get entirely clean by filling a sink with water, taking a cloth and a bar of soap, and having a good scrub and rinse without using the amount of water required by either a shower or tub. Also remember that many Europeans understand the purpose of the bidet - and not for washing socks!

Water and electricity are much more expensive in Italy than the U.S., habits reflect that. They have bidets to wash what's necessary between showers.

Depending upon their personal situation, bathing once a week or so may be perfectly normal, and you would be considerate to treat it so. Not all areas of the world have access to extensive natural resources that we take for granted, nor are they influenced by our marketing driven perceptions of what is normal. It is not an indicator that they are any less "civilized" than we are if their daily hygiene routines don't mimic our own. Live with it, don't make it an issue and look forward to learning more about a culture other than your own.

Just to clarify: I have lived in Europe and know a number of Europeans. My comments were not intended to mass all Europeans together, but rather were a generalization. On the whole, Europeans are less likely to shower every day compared to Americans. But that's not to suggest that most don't. And it's pretty easy to tell when someone hasn't showered for a couple days without having to ask them or even that they smell stinky (there is a reason perfume and cologne are popular there). It may also be a matter of habit, location and facilities. Many people have full access to showers and no financial constraints. But others have no shower and only a hand held spray in the tub. Water and heating costs will vary as will someone's ability to pay. And as some have pointed out, there are other ways of getting freshened up without a full shower or bath.

It's true energy costs are higher in Europe, so wasting hot water is frowned on. Space is also more expensive, so Europeans have smaller closets and wardrobes. That said, Europeans I've known shower daily (but long showers and soaks in a tub may be less common) and use deoderant. They are at least as committed to their hygene as I am to mine.

I have had a good laugh reading all these posts about european hygiene! I have lived in europe (continental) for 30 years and travelled extensively in many european countries; of the friends I have lived or stayed with, most take showers every day, or every two days, depending on weather and activities! However, it is a known fact that washing too frequently actually makes you more suceptible to germs; before going to Mali, in Africa, I was a bit worried about picking up something unsavoury; an Iranian student of mine reminded me that I should not wash too often and that would build up resistance! (Having been brought up in the far east in the days before showers, this was not a foreign idea). Americans sometimes have weird ideas about europeans... like the girl I met on the plane to the USA who had not expected to find flushing toilets!!!

Perhaps your relatives are sneaking in some sink bathing, so as not to use up too much water (an issue in some parts of Italy). Imagine their surprise to find no bidet in the bathroom (I'm just guessing here)! Probably less daily bathing/showering during the winter months, too.

Maybe this has nothing to do with culture. Maybe your relatives are just slobs.

You should go straight to the source and ask them why they smell so bad. Find a gentle way to broach the topic. Perhaps over breakfast you could ask if they're interested in learning about American style branding/advertising, and then pull out a bar of Zest and a stick of Degree?

I did not say that they smell! I just wondered if anyone knew WHY some European's don't bathe every day like Americans do......I didn't ask because I didn't feel comfortable doing so. We had other relatives visit several years ago and it was the same thing. My friend had relatives visit from England and said they didn't bathe much either. My cousin DID say that electricity and fuel are very expensive, so perhaps the water cost is a factor..also the fact that they have bidets in their bathrooms would eliminate having to clean one part of the body! I know that they eat a much more natural and healthy diet than we do (much less processed food) so perhaps this is part of that reasoning too.................just curious!!