Rome and Venice from Cruise Ship

If he doesn’t like cities, perhaps you should choose a different cruise itinerary?
In Venice, do not stay near San Marco. Stay in Cannareggio or another neighborhood that is away from the crowds, mostly from the cruise ships. Warning:He will be in a crowd if you stay with the cruise ship passengers.
Rome: stay in Travestere or another neighborhood away from crowds that are near Spanish Steps, Pantheon. You have a real challenge here. Good luck.
The Italian Lakes are beautiful. Stay is less visited towns on Lake Maggiore, Como or Garda. Saló and Malcesine on Lake Garda were not terribly crowded when we visited and it is closer to Venice.

Better yet, cancel cruise and book Rick Steve’s Village Italy in 14 days, a much,much better fit for you both.

It's unclear whether your husband will include the Roman Forum and the Coliseum as "big city stuff". When the Roman Empire was around, that was "big city stuff"! Did you mean to say that he hates museums too? I don't consider Venice to be standard "big city". Every part of it seems magical. Since you chose a cruise, it's unclear whether you are willing to rent a car for the Italian lakes? If you take an organized tour, you will always be in a crowd. But you are right that from May to September is high season in both the lakes and in Rome and Venice.

One practical approach would be to go to your library and look at Rick Steves "Italy". When you read the material about Rome and Venice, you may have a better idea of how he will react to independent travel in those two places.

I find World War II to be much more visible in western Europe than it is in the United States. How many people know there is an important war memorial in 30th Street Station in Philadelphia, for example? It takes extra effort to get to rural war sites, but many people take trains to places like Viterbo (which has lots of other history visible.) Are you willing to take trains on your own? (This [i.e. independent local travel] is discussed extensively in Rick's books.)

The cruise is the part we are excited for. Greece and history. Thanks for the other, Lake Maggiore was the one I was looking at.
We generally take public transportation when we travel. Small group tours or guide books are fun. I don’t mean to sound antisocial, not at all. He can talk anyone’s ear off; more claustrophobic maybe!? Museums (not art) are his favorite. He can spend hours in one.

OK, Lake Maggiore. Close to Malpensa airport for a flight home to US.Stay in Stresa, ferry to the Borromean Islands one day. You can also take a ferry to Locarno, Switzerland at the north end of the lake. Drive up to small, nearby Lake Orta, or take a bus there. No WWII sites.
For an ingetesting WWI and WWII histoey site, not far from Venice, can take a train, go to Bassano de Grappa, alpine setting, learn about the Alpini troops. We were there during their annual reunion.

Does your husband not like the crowds of a big-city or, the tight movement of big cities? I get it if he's more of a country mouse, than city mouse. Keep in mind, tourist season in Italy is all year round, there really isn't an off-season.
There's areas in Venice that have the small town vibe, just don't go to the popular hot-spots in the middle of the day, that really goes for all over. If you stay around the perimeter or, even the outlaying islands, that might help turn-down the intensity for him.

Rome is going to be packed at all-times, no way around it. Wandering at night I've always enjoyed as there's less crowds and the lighting at night in the narrow streets gives the city a timeless glow. There's plenty of history in Rome, for WWII history, check out this link.

Tuscany or, the hill towns may be more of his thing, as there's endless small towns, villages and hamlets to drive around and explore. It'll be a slow pace than Venice or, Rome. Same if you go more South, the pace slows down,
Might be worth picking this book up, as it'll interest your husband and get him more involved in the trip planning rather than you researching and presenting endless options and him turning them down.

Have you cruised before? Cruises are one big crowd.

Zcorsair, that pamphlet looks interesting. I have bought the book, I haven’t received it yet.

Thanks for all the input. I have been scouting this forum for awhile before I asked and I had some ideas. He’ll have to spend a couple of days in Rome for me.
We have been on a few cruises, we do enjoy them. We don’t do mega ships, but this is the smallest, only 1230 or so passengers.
Does 5 days before and 5 after the cruise sound reasonable to see some of the areas? Only one sea day for big relaxation.

If your husband is interested in WW11, he may like Anzio which is a short 1 hour train ride from Rome. The 442 Neisi division was the most decorated in that war. The American Cemetary is a short taxi ride away.

Does 5 days before and 5 after the cruise sound reasonable...

Yes. You will be able to do justice to both cities with that amount of time.

In Rome consider a day trip to Ostia Antica to escape from the hustle and bustle of the city itself. Easy and quick to get there using local public transit and very few people. In Venice a day trip to Verona will be nice change of pace as will going out to the islands of Murano and Burano.

We've cruised in and out of both cities so let us know if you need specific information.

Forgot to mention: research your preferred means of getting to the very distant Rome cruise port. This is an unpleasant surprise to many first-time Rome cruise departures.

Tim, thanks! I have looked at that and as very surprised. I am researching it, depending on what we decide to do. The UBER or taxi is out—$$$$$$$

Check with your cruise line. They may have transfers available, for a price, of course.

We don’t do mega ships, but this is the smallest, only 1230 or so passengers.

And that's small? Oh my goodness.

I like your idea about getting into the country. There's so much more to Italy than the big cities. Consider traveling to Orvieto. It is an easy train ride from Rome and is a charming hill town. You could stay at a nearby agriturismo. I bet they can arrange for someone to pick you up at the train station and shuttle you into Orvieto or nearby villages. I don't know how much WWII history is in the area, but you can't throw a pebble in Italy without hitting something of historical significance.