Restaurant Food Sharing Etiquette in Italy

Yes, they are fine with sharing, the expectation that you will each have four courses is long gone, particularly the places you will eat. That said, a more formal place might be a bit miffed that you are taking up a table and essentially one of you not ordering, more casual places really don't care.

That said, most casual restaurants in places you will go open earlier than you might think, so a meal at 6 or 7 is not unheard of. Also, portions do tend to be right-sized, not mounding plates of pasta, especially the more expensive the place, so each ordering a pasta or a secondi is not an overly large amount of food.

If nothing else, do what is more the tradition, eat a larger meal at 1:00 PM or just after, and just have a light meal in the evening.

My Italian friends say that you should always order at least two dishes each. So I usually get a pasta and a side of vegetables and my husband a pasta and an antipasti or salad. We share but each order two dishes each.

And we usually eat earlier than 8 pm.

If you'll allow me to be blunt and opinionated, sharing courses anywhere decent in Europe is crass.

miuccia probably saw my post in the solo dining thread too, but what I was getting at there applies here I think. Commerce in Europe (particularly in this context in Italy I think) works differently to the US. There's a little bit more give and take. Sitting at a table and not ordering food is disrespectful.

I'm happy to do it in my neighbourhood Turkish place, the big meze grill platter is portioned for two. I certainly wouldn't do it anywhere Italian in London or anywhere with standards of service.

Thanks for this information, it really is helpful! While we are doing a tour in Florence & Tuscany; we will have meals on our own AND are traveling to Varenna (Lake Como) & Cinque Terre (Vernazza) also.
I like the idea of a bigger meal for lunch AND snack/Appertiva in the ealry evenings. I do appreciate that if you are in a restaurant for dinner- you respect the customs! Can't wait to try all the amazing dishes of the regions!

Thanks miuccia! Super informative to know.
Also loving the restaurant suggestions. We travel on a budget & usually eat in restaurants no more than 1x per day. Doing the Rick Steves Tuscany tour- so stopping in Florence, Chianti, Sienna, Pitigliano, Maremma, Volterra, Lucca

You are free to share whatever you want. I always share dishes with my wife. Tell them in advance so that they will bring an extra plate, and sometimes they even split the dishes in two separate dishes for you when they bring it to the table.

Restaurants generally open at 7pm or no later than 7:30pm for dinner, in case you don’t want to wait for the Italians who usually come between 8:30 and 10pm, depending on locations (from Rome south dinner is later than the north). Restaurants that open for dinner before 7pm are probably trying to cater to North Europeans or American tourists, so I don’t go there.

We ate at Billy's in Manarola. Absolutely loved this place and cannot recommend it enough. There is a view of Manarola and the sea from the restaurant. It is very popular with locals and travelers. Make a reservation. There was a variety of food options, pasta and seafood. If I go back to CT it will be to go back to Billy's.

In Varenna, we ate at Bar Il Molo. Gorgeous views. Food and service was good. Very casual. I think I got pizza and my husband got pasta or risotto.

Sitting at a table and splitting everything in two may be considered rude in some part of italy, but you have to eat what you are craving.Consider that if it is Saturday and you are occupying the table of a small restaurant for a pasta in an un-touristy location you are taking away the opportunity for the caterer to work on the most important day. It is always best to ask for portion sizes and let them know you want to split it between two beforehand.

For me, I would think that good manners dictates that two people should order two main courses, or primi, each.

We often share share starters, or antipasti, and sometimes desserts, but always have one main dish each, plus wine.

It doesn't matter which country we are in, that rule seems to work and portions are much smaller everywhere other than the US it seems.

There are some cultures where food is amost always shared. I havent seen that yet in Europe, but there may be places. Dont know.

Sit down, look around, if you dont see the locals digging into each others plates, then I wouldnt do it either. Its crass in proper society in the US and where I currently live.

I did see a group of six tourists (not Americans) at dinner a few nights ago. The parents were scraping food from one plate to the next, the kids had all brought their own candy and everyone was drinking the water thay had brought. The waiter, who i sort of know, was disgusted and said that it was common with people from that particular country ... that and he was certain that he wouldnt be getting a tip. He actually joked that they tip worse than Americans.

I am yet to see Americans acting so poorly.

When I travel, I am on my best behavior. Do as the locals, and when not absolutely certain, do better than the locals.

Lots of interesting points made in this thread. I especially like miuccia's deep insights in how dining in Italy is different in more ways than just the food on the menu. And that tourists change things by being there and expecting things to be done as they are at home. Every time somebody asks for "non-touristy" restaurant recommendations, I wonder if the tourist recognizes their presence requires respect for the "non-touristy" customs.

That being said, even though portions in Europe are generally smaller than the US, I still cant eat all those courses.

portions in Europe are generally smaller than the US

That's what I had recalled from previous visits, but so far this summer I've not found it to be the case. Servings have been huge in England, Belgium, Netherlands, Berlin, Denmark and Sweden. Perhaps we fat Americans are leaving an unfortunate legacy vis a vis European restaurants.

portions in Europe are generally smaller than the US

Maybe on average. But as noted above there are exceptions. "in Europe" rarely works. Europe just too diverse.

In local eateries where I live in Europe the portions are very large. In the nicer places they tend to be smaller. Same is pretty much true in the US, or at least where I come from in the US.

The concept that maybe Americans are to blame for larger portions in Europe supposes that something less than 10% of all the tourists in Europe have influenced the local markets. I doubt there is a lot of truth to that. Do keep in mind that no matter how influential and important we think we are …. Just ain’t so in the big scheme of life. Specific to Italy Americans make up about 9% of the tourists, Germans almost 3x that.

Sorry OP. Way off topic. My apologies.

At least pretend to be eating a meal. Two antipasti and then one primi and secondi that you switch plates with might work and most restaurants will serve one person a pasta and one a meat dish at the same time -- each person needs to order one main course at least and one other dish. In anything but a pizza joint, getting not even a full meal for two and sharing is abusive of a restaurant.