Restaurant Ediquite

Our practice when we dine out in Italy, wherever we are, is to each order an antipasto ( which we contemplate sharing) and then he orders a prima (pasta) dish and I order from the secondi ( meat and fish dishes). He loves pasta but I cannot eat gluten. We also order a bottle of water and a bottle of wine. We do not eat dessert. Never have we experienced negative vibes or felt in any way that we offended anyone by eating this way.

Join the crowd. What you describe is how my wife and I spent 30 days in Italy. Only we did not order a bottle of local wine, just a carafe. This subject has been discussed many times and the general answer seems to be eat what you want. No one is judging you.

no one frowns as long as you pay the bill. It is pretty laid back not like your experiences in America as they ain't relying on tips based on the size of the bill like the phony waiters here

they ain't relying on tips based on the size of the bill like the
phony waiters here

Phony waiters? You have a problem with people impersonating waiters in your city? Now there's a scam I haven't heard of before.

Consider ordering house wine - it's usually local and quite drinkable. You can ask to taste it before you commit. House wine can be ordered by the glass and by the carafe (1/4 liter, 1/2 liter, your choice).

When you order, you can ask your waiter how big a portion is - especially for an appetizer. Also remember that generally servings are not huge, like they are in the US.

It's very rare that you would be rushed to leave a table in Europe. Generally you will have call the waiter to order coffee and/or dessert (don't be surprised if the waiter offers a complimentary after-dinner drink like limoncello), and you will almost invariably have to call the waiter to get your check. Otherwise you'll be there until they start washing the floor.

What time you want to eat can make a difference in what kind of establishment you choose. Nice restaurants will often have specific hours for lunch and dinner and closed in between. If you want to dine earlier (or lunch later), a trattoria or osteria would be your options.

Chris,

I also don't eat the same quantities as I used to when younger, so tend to order smaller meals in Italy. I often order something like a salad or a small plate of grilled vegetables to start with, and then a Primi dish (usually pasta) for the main course, along with a glass (or two) of the house wine and a bottle of water.

I've never felt that my dining choices were frowned upon or that I was breaking any etiquette rules.

We did exactly that in Bologna; it’ quite acceptable.
During the week we would eat the muli-course fix-price lunch. The portion were very reasonable as these lunches, that include wine, are for people who have to go back to work after lunch. Eat like a local!

Consider ordering house wine - it's usually local and quite drinkable.
You can ask to taste it before you commit. House wine can be ordered
by the glass and by the carafe (1/4 liter, 1/2 liter, your choice).

Great suggestion from Chani. My husband like reds and I only do whites so we do separate 1/4 liter carafes of house wines all the time, or you could share a bigger size of either. And yes, we've split appetizers and/or desserts with no issues.

Thanks for the responses.
I assumed that there would be no problems but we will be in Bologina and didn't want to cause any problems while dining in some of the larger recommended restaurants.
Thanks for the feedback.