Racism

Sorry you had this experience

the water and bread arrived, no oil or plates.

Just for your own information, serving oil with bread is an Italian-American thing. It's not done in Italy except when there's a new harvest of olive oil.

And bread is usually just put on the table and not a plate. Bread is not eaten prior to the meal as it is in the USA. The Italians don't believe in filling up on it. It's best used to sop up any gravy or sauce left on a plate.

I'm sorry this happened to you. Did the pizzas of other diners have more ingredients? Maybe this is just not a good restaurant.

Welcome to the forum!
Is it possible this was your first visit to Italy?
European wait staff don't introduce themselves or welcome you with a big smile. As mentioned above, no oil or plate for bread in Italy, and pizzas generally aren't loaded with toppings like the US.

Could there have been racism? Of course.

Sorry this happened. People can really suck sometimes. And I’m not going to deny that what you think happened, did indeed happen. Your radar for this is no doubt a whole lot better than mine. Italy is beautiful and I hope your trip improves for you and your family. God bless.

Many of the things you have complaints about are also cultural differences between what you're used to in the US and what's customary in Italy. No, they don't 'do' the oil-on-the-plate thing - that's an American thing - nor do they tend to fall all over themselves at the host/hostess stand, another American thing. Yes, the bread can be very crusty and is not intended to be eaten before the meal but for wiping up sauce served with your pasta. It can also be common that other patrons had reservations for those visually open seats up front thus those were not available for you. And yes, pizza in Italy is generally not the same as in the US: not as overloaded with stuff.

This dinner aside, hope you found many experiences to enjoy during your Italian adventure!

I am also a minority person, maybe not the same skin color as you but not white. I am also a pretty experienced traveler to Italy. I believe what you experienced had more to do with being an American tourist than the color of your skin. Part of it was a lack of the cultural norms in Italy restaurants, like they don’t offer oil or plates with the bread. The bread is meant to sop up sauce from your pasta, so they serve it stale and crusty. And pizza is very different there.

But I think the main problem is that Amalfi is a place besieged with tourists from all over, many of whom do not know the routine in restaurants. The waiters are worn out and don’t feel the need to be nice. Maybe it was a place that is so busy and crowded they just want to rush through with low quality food and get you out, because they know you won’t be back. Cynical but that is how it can be in over-touristy places.

And please take a lesson from this, learn the customs and routine in restaurants, and enjoy your trip.

PS we were asked to leave a restaurant in Venice because we did not “order enough food”. How is that for discrimination? But it wasn’t. They had a rule there that each per had to order their own main dish, no sharing. Lesson learned.

As a white person, I regard myself as poorly equipped to discuss what is and isn't racist behavior as experienced by black folks. I hope the OP finds more agreeable tourist experiences elsewhere, and I'd encourage that person, and other tourists, to research local behavioral customs before drawing too extensive a conclusion regarding any single experience.

This thread brought to mind a book I read a few years ago, and when I heard the author speak at an event. It's fairly specific to the black British experience, but many ideas within would also apply to other nationalities. It makes me think I should buy my own copy and read it again. It was a bit of an eye opener for white guy like me who is ready to take a stand against racism where I see it.

Why I’m No Longer Talking to White People About Race - Reni Eddo-Lodge

Here's an article in The Guardian where the author covers some of the points raised within -

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/may/30/why-im-no-longer-talking-to-white-people-about-race

Perhaps we shouldn't tell the OP he just doesn’t understand the culture. Here is some light reading.

https://www.infomigrants.net/en/post/55983/survey-reveals-perceptions-of-racism-towards-africans-in-italy
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-62476406
https://www.cronachediordinariorazzismo.org/libro-bianco/racism-in-italy-official-data/

My son, who is and looks a lot more ethnic than I do, was surprised with the racism he faced when he moved to Europe a few years ago. “Dad, if you listen to the news the US is the worst. But I never dealt with this sort of thing where we lived.”

Like the current Miller Lite commercials, "why can't it be both". Yes racism, but the points about differences in service and expectations can be valid too.

As a white person, I regard myself as poorly equipped to discuss what is and isn't racist behavior as experienced by black folks.

Me, too.

Hey folks, I've cleared out a bit to keep this thread a bit more on track and to improve how this topic is being discussed.

Noting the cultural differences is important and informative, and this could have been shared in ways that didn't infer or conclude that the OP wasn't on the receiving end of racist behavior. That is frankly not up to you to judge or determine. Assume there is more to it than what was shared as the OP is not required to write at length to convince you. Critiquing whether or not something is racist... that is not welcoming to those who regularly deal with racism, and this forum is to be welcoming for all travelers. I know you all to be thoughtful individuals, and I thank you all in advance for being more thoughtful on such subjects in the future.

More posts came in as I was writing my last one, and those weren't fitting the direction I'd hope for in this discussion either. I'm locking the thread.