Planning for 2023- Too many places to see?

For me the compromise is to go to fewer places--which allows you time to branch out to less tourist parts of the city you're in--or to leave one of the biggies for a future trip and substitute a smaller place where you can take things more slowly. The smaller place could be close to one of the biggies that remains on your itinerary or not. There are lots of options for the smaller places; some that I've enjoyed (I don't claim they're undiscovered) are Padua near Venice, Lucca near Florence and Orvieto between Florence and Rome.

Try to focus on having the most fun you can have during the trip, not on what places you don't have time to see. I can assure you that, even if you had 3 months, you still would be missing a lot of great places. That's just the way it is. I do think it's worth avoiding a trip that has you constantly hopping from city to city, because after the first hour or so, time spent sitting on a train or bus is pretty much a dead loss. (Packing a meal helps, though.)

Check out the 'itinerary' tab for this tour https://www.ricksteves.com/tours/italy/venice-florence-rome

you can get a frame work of what can be done.

Making your trip 14 days(nights) would be much better than 10. If limited to 10 days, I would suggest "pick 2 cities"

Besides the actual number of nights in Italy, it would be very useful to know the approximate dates of your trip. Both of these matter a lot. Getting around isn't a problem, trains are plentiful, fast and comfortable. What may be more of a challenge is finding the right lodgings.

I just finished with a 10 night trip with my husband and 2 adult sons. We arrived in Milan just one night
Milan - 1 night
Venice- 2 nights
Florence -3 night
Rome - 4 nights.

They actually loved it all and were glad we went to the big 3. My only con, and we all agreed , is I over scheduled us just a little. We needed more time to just walk around. I had 7 tours. 2 could have been scrapped easily. 5 would have been perfect. They loved Venice, I wish I had scheduled one more night and one less guided tour.

I would do 3 nights Venice, 4 nights Florence, 4 nights Rome. (11 nights). That’s how we would do it again, with more free time.

With 14 days, I would pick two out of the big three (Florence, Rome, Venice), and add in maybe a few days in between in a smaller city to break it up. Your number isn't going to be much of a problem if you use public transport, but it does slightly hamper your availability to take taxis, because you'll need two instead of one. Depending on when you go, this might not be an issue. For example, Florence is very walkable, but when it's hot out, we frequently will hop in a taxi to save 20 minutes of walking. When it's nice out, walking is much more manageable.

Either way, I would try to limit yourself to one "major" site per day, and leave part of the day free for wandering, eating gelato, or sipping wine.

If you can swing 11 to 14 nights go to all three. All are wonderful cities with so much history, architecture and food. 14 nights would give you a slower pace or some day trips. 4 nights Venice with a day trip someplace Padua maybe? 5 nights Florence. Day trip to Lucca? Day trip Pisa? Rome 5 nights a day trip to? Or no day trips and a slower pace of travel in each city. They are 3 of the most visited cities in Italy for a reason.

If you can push your trip to more versus fewer days, I don't see why you can't explore the attractions of the "Holy Trinity" (Rome ,Florence and Venice) and have R&R time as well. Additionally, as 4 of your offspring are adults, you don't HAVE to do everything as a group. You can occasionally split up to accommodate different interests and individual down-time needs.

Choosing just 3 cities will cut down on time-consuming packing up and moving from one city/accommodation to another, and allow for some flexibility to work around weather and fatigue. For instance, 4 nights/3.5 days Venice, 5 nights/4.5 days Florence and 5 nights/4.5 days Rome. If you fly into Venice and out of Rome, you would only change cities and accommodations twice: Venice to Florence, and Florence to Rome.

Florence makes a good base for some easy day trips to some interesting places around the region - Siena, Lucca, Pisa, Arezzo, etc. - so you could even take a day from Venice and add it that one. No right or wrong to how you allocate your time, it's very much up to your tribe's interests. Day trips can be nice as there's no packing up, checking out, unpacking, etc. needed.

The suggestion to limit the biggest attractions to one per day is a good one. It's not recommended, say, to do the Vatican Museum and the Colosseum/Forum/Palatine the same day. The duomo complex (museum, baptistry, church, dome or belltower) can be one day's single big event in Florence. Oh, and right there is a good opportunity to split up: some of your group may be up for the dome or belltower climb but others may not.

Accommodations for 7 will be a challenge. Your best bets are apartments, and they'll be economical choices as well as it will allow you to eat some of your meals in. Breakfast is a no-brainer; pick up fixings and let everyone make their own. No need to get everyone in and out of the bathrooms (you need more than 1!!!!) at the same time to go out to eat. Some lunches can be "in" as well. As you research apartments, pay close attention to the bed descriptions; a "bed" might consists of a pullout in the main living area, maybe even more than one of those.

Yes, it would help to know what time of year you're planning to do this. As well? Enlist those young adults in the planning duties! If they've not done so already, It's the perfect opportunity to learn how to research, organize and book future trips of their own, and take some of the stress off having to do it all yourself. :O)

Thanks everyone so much!! This is definitely helping me get started! I’m sure as I go along I’ll have more questions.

We just did 12 days in March/April.

From my perspective, I think all three are doable and enjoyable in that time if you do not take day trips or schedule things all day every day.

They are touristy places... but they are also magical places. Though there are souvenir shops and long lines to things, there are plenty of small shops and quiet streets to stroll on if you go just a little bit out of your way.

Early mornings are also a very different feel. If you want to walk around Venice in the mist with hardly a tourist in sight, go at 7am. (Gondoliers will be out pretty early and I don't think a gondola ride is a bit overrated, especially if you're out on the water with mainly delivery boats and fishermen. If you want to go especially early, talk to a gondolier and arrange it the night before.) If you want to see the Spanish Steps without a huge crowd, take a rest in the heat of the day then sneak out with your young adults at 1am. (The piazza and steps are beautifully lit at night, as is the Trevi Fountain.)

There is such an abundance of historic sites in Rome, you can come across an amazing basilica tucked into a neighborhood and, most of the time, you can see it for free or a small donation and there aren't any crowds in the vast majority of the ones that don't make the "lists". I have to tell you, the art is just as stunning (and often by quite famous artists!) and many have fascinating histories.

It's difficult not to want to fit everything in, but our best days were the ones in which we did not have guided tours of tourist sites. (and our tours were great!).

I keep recommending it to people, but with your crowd (if you're not too prudish), this tour would be ideal and it's in the evening, when most historical sites are closed. https://www.guruwalk.com/walks/38348-free-walking-tour-of-ghosts-and-mysteries-of-rome
It's a "free" tour, but the instructions are very clear that it's a "pay-what-you-wish" scenario. My teens loved it more than our expensive tours of the "big" stuff. I am very careful with money and I was happy to pay a fair price and tip. We won't forget it! It was actually chock full of real historical figures and events that we didn't hear from anywhere else... and we fact checked! ;)

You can take the bus to neighborhoods where no one will automatically speak English to you, and see amazing street art, with or without a guide. If money is no object, you can reach out to a number of talented guides and specifically ask them to take you to the amazing places people skip or to places with fewer tourists, or to the "big" places at the least busy times. (It actually may be quite economical with the size and age of your group as a single 3 hour tour can easily cost $100 per person. A private guide could give you a lot more bang for your buck and is unlikely to charge $700.00 for a 3 hour tour. Highly qualified guides quoted friends around 600 for a full day/300 for half.)

ETA: Great advice from Kathy! Just switching from 2 to 3 people dramatically limits options for accommodation. I would focus on apartments (booking.com, airbnb, vrbo) as close to historical areas as possible to minimize needing to bus with your whole group. (Walking is wonderful in all three cities.) In Rome (much larger than the other 2), look near Navona, Pantheon, Trevi for centrality and an "authentic" feel. Monti is a great option too, but I'd look in the North/West part to stay away from loud night life and too many tourists.) If you're having no luck, Trastevere is closer than people think.

Florence is less than 1/10th the ground area, so if you're in the city, you're in! It's pretty darn walkable. Same with the main islands of Venice.

Three cities in 14 days is a great pace! Travel between each by train (Super easy coming from someone who uses a car 24/7 and had never used public transport before Europe).
You can sleep at home...that is our travel moto so no problem with Gogogo. The relaxing part of the trip for me are the train rides between places, I can catch by breath, journal, look out the window, chat with my husband, read. Also you will walk ALOT! Even though these are big touristy places each one has places of peace and beauty.

1) I think in 14 days (presuming at least 12 are on the ground in Italy) is good to see the Big 3. It is a bit too rushed for my pace, but it can be done.

2) Venice is worth 2 nights - we loved wandering the streets the most. Also do a gondola ride...yes, touristy, but so worth it. We did a mid afternoon ride and it is a highlight of our trip.

3) Florence is magical, especially at night. Go up to Piazzale Michaelangelo near sunset one evening and then walk back across one of the bridges at night for an absolute delight.

4) Rome is full of history and wonder - everything we saw was awesome.

Just know that you won't see and do everything. Prioritize the "musts" and see what else you can fit in. Yes, you will be on the go but if that is your style, go for it. We already know we will go back to Italy to do a less busy trip and see the coast.