People Watching in the Piazza: Any Words of Wisdom for a Bookworm?

I would like to suggest 2 authors whose books will give you some idea of life in modern Italy. The first is Donna Leon who is an American who has lived in Venice for over 25 years. She writes mysteries with the same central characters throughout. She does a great job of commenting on the real sitation in Italy and Venice in particular (for this reason she won't publish her books in Italy!). They are gentle mysteries...no violence, blood and gore. Suggest you start with her first books..Death at La Fenice and Aqua Alta. The other author is the late Magdalen Nabb, an Englishwoman living in Florence for a long time. She also always has the same central characters and she will give you a good feel for life in "real" Florence. Unfortunately she died at a relatively young age last year. These are just 2 suggestions that I highly endorse. I am sure there are many more!

If I understand John's question, he's asking about how to best experience and observe Italian life "in the flesh", not through books.

If that's the case, I suspect that Ron and Claire will both have a lot to offer.

John: It's a good question, we have two correspondents living in Italy, Ron and Claire--maybe they will have some thoughts. Leslie has already pointed out that you're not necessarily looking for more books, but I was wondering whether you had read Frances Mayes "Under the Tuscan Sun", to me it offered some insights on what you're asking.

When I was in Rome I bought a book written by an American about his experiences living in Rome with his family, and it was great. Unfortunately I can't remember the name of it or him. He did write about piazzas and cafes etc. Maybe Ron or someone else knows of him or this book. Whilst it was about Rome it's still pertinent. I'll see if I can find the book.

We've read many books while living here... I'll have to go look at the bookcase and pull some out.

At the heart of your question is a major cultural difference between US & Italy. I come from a business executive background; very analytical. John, I was much like you when I came here - my wife the opposite!

I found it very difficult to "sit still." I always had to have "something to do," an agenda as my wife calls it. It was a major shift for me to just SLOW DOWN... Just the other day, about 6-8 Americans living here in Rome were talking at a soccer game and we all laughed when this topic came up. We all agreed that living here had caused us a MAJOR shift in our patience, tolerance, and acceptance. You HAVE NO CHOICE... you just have to "go with the flow," and that flow is FAR SLOWER than in the US.

The challenge for folks visiting is you want to see SO MUCH... and there's SO MUCH to see. My wife & I have been here almost a year and we still find new things in Rome - daily!

I think your point is extremely valid - there is a whole side of Italy that many "rushed" visitors just miss. I've come to appreciate not just the art, history, etc. but as you say, the culture - moreover "the experience!" That's what WE CAME FOR.

I always advise folks, "piano, piano." That's take it slowly, because that is part of Italy. (Actually it's most of Italy, just try and get something fixed or installed!). Your question signifies your understanding!

Ciao,
Ron

Okay having said all that, would I offer some advice? (Claire help!!!) First of all you will probably have to "schedule" your "people watching." I know that goes against the principle but unless you do it, the "things to see" will become tasks and will fill time and overwhelm the principle of "people watching" and absorbing the culture! So make it part of your itinerary.

Engage a local - Often I've gone and sat in piazzas and locals will tell me the entire history of the area... things you will not find in guidebooks!

Head to a cafe. If you order a multi-course meal you will be there for a minimum of 2 hours - probably more. Waiters are also great folks to engage; They have great stories to tell. Our last waiter in Venice shared his kids photos, life experiences, etc. He was great! Cafe's, Bar's (coffee houses) are great places to people watch.

Go to a mass. If you want to absorb Italian culture, there may be no better place. I'm not Catholic but I've probably been to 15-20 masses. My first time was when I was in a church, mass was about to start, all the "tourists" were leaving and an elderly lady asked me if I wanted to stay. I did and later had an incredible conversation with her - primarily about lifestyle in Italy!

It's okay to take a crutch, like a book or an audio to help you "adjust" to sitting still. For me this was great because I would listen/read about the piazza/city/site I was in while I sat and people watched!

Don't worry - about anything! My Italian friends always chide me when I try and stay "on task and on-time." They would say "BOH!" which can mean many things but in this case meant WHATEVER! And that has to be your perspective -"Whatever!" I'm on vacation -- and I'm sitting here! Everything else is insignificant! "Piano, Piano!"

Good Luck!

Ciao,
Ron

My honest advice is to get away from these tourist hot spots and plunge into towns that aren't listed or discussed much in guide books. Try Severgnini's own town of Crema for example, given only a mention in most books, but pretty "real", along with being a little gem of a city. My mother always says that for her the real Italy begins when we take her to the supermarket, now that's the real Italy. Or if we go to the park with the kids, she finds it really neat watching the other parents with their children. Italy is many things, but don't think it can only be found taking a gondola in Venice. It can be found doing the most mundane things, in what we might consider mundane places, just don't sit back and hope the "real" will come to you, you have to take an active role yourself.

We are fortunate to have family in a small village in Abruzzo. We visit Fallo during Festa (1st full weekend in August). I love to sit on a bench in the square - or outside the Bacchi court and just watch. and watch and watch.

Other favorite spots are Piazza Navona in Rome and St. Marks Square in Venice. The Republica Piazza in Florence is fun at night.

Just find a seat, have a cocktail, and watch.

Thank you to Claire and Ron for taking the time to contribute and share such thoughtful insights on "People Watching in the Piazza."

Thanks to all for your helpful input on my question! Really appreciate it. The book thing, well, I've got that down pat. It's the slowing down long enough to really see what's taking place--and somehow placing what I've read about this wonderful and complicated country in a real context, in the moment--that I've found a struggle simply because it doesn't suit me to slow down, ordinarily. Maybe more indulging in birra alla spina around siesta time will do the trick. There's a line in Severgnini that refers to the need to go beyond "the tyranny of the picturesque" to really 'get' Italia. But as an American born & raised on the south side of Chicago, the "picturesque" is so damn "picturesque" that I find it hard to do! Thanks, again. (:

John: Just when I thought the Helpline was only a nuts and bolts kind of board, you and Ron and Claire enliven it with some insights! When in Europe I am still often surprised by the significant cultural differences between here and there. There is so much I will never know about Europe, but for someone who finds differences interesting and worth pondering, Europe is a feast. It can be much more than just a checklist or big "theme park" kind of experience. I'm not very good at it, even after many trips--like you, John, I unfortunately naturally gravitate toward the "what does the guidebook say" approach. But with help from others with insights, maybe there's hope for me yet.

ken, ron, john and claire...i wanted to add things to this discussion..after our too short week in Rome, but was "afraid of the master"...oh well, ...Like Claire's mother i think supermarkets are the BEST museums with excellent gift shops. One day near Santa Maria Maggiore i saw a man carrying grocery bags...and stared at them..He looked at me like i was a shopping snatcher!!..I explained in French/English that i was just trying to find the supermarket...and he walked me to the underground store entrance..I went back twice...We did have an apt with a terrace so were "obligated" to have a few meals at "home"...doing the "piano method".
Small suggestion to appreciate local, even in a big city, is to get up early...That's not often easy for vacationers..but i'm always awake by 6:00...and it's such a wonderful time...the sky and sounds of early morning are quite special...and you'll meet only "locals" when you go out for the coffee....Plus for me, my best Michelangelo experience was at

730 am in San Pietro in Vincoli...priest saying mass for three nuns and two older women, via a microphone...; and the cleaning man saying with head and finger gestures "don't walk on my marble floor"; other than them, it was just me and Moses.. and that was pretty good.

.........sorry..i'm not very clever in the computer dept...but you probably get the idea that paragraph 2 should got after paragraph 1

Regina - that's a great story... I often seek and get help in the supermercato! I also like to go to the daily markets. We go to the market on Via Andrea Doria near the Vatican - it's about 98% locals and I enjoy "eating" my way through the 4 block market... then I take my friends over to St. Peter's... It's a great way to get the local flavor and start the day!

Ciao,
Ron

My wife and I are avid people watchers.

Everywhere seems to have some type of evening stroll where the main item on the agenda is people watching.

I think the best thing is to wander off the beaten path. Even a few blocks from a tourist area can become the real thing.

When you are sure you have left the tourists behind. Ask someone where their favorite restaurant is. This will start the conversation. Since you aren't in a tourist zone, they probably won't speak perfect English but you can always get the idea across. Sit down, relax, laugh, eat great food, adopt the "come what may" attitude and you're there.

The book I was referring to was "As the Romans Do" by Alan Epstein. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Not sure how easy it is to get.