Getting the check in Italian restaurants

You're fine, it's only your expectation that is wrong. Generally, Italian restaurants will not bring a bill to the table as this would be seen as trying to get you to leave. After you tell the waiter you are done, just saunter up to the reception desk on your way out and ask for the conto if it's not presented automatically.

It's normal, a single waiter has more tables to take care of in the evening and if you don't say you are in a hurry they think it's kinder to let you stay as long as you want.

Those who really want to go away pay at the cashier or tell the waiter something like: "abbiamo fretta".

Many Italians coming back from US think the way american waiters bring the check at the table to be quite unpolite, as if they wanted you to go away. I remember my parents complaining about it for ages when telling stories about their honeymoon in the states.

It's a matter of cultural differences, for example the Russians once thought that arriving five/ten minutes late as guests for dinner was good elementary education. Like "let's give our hosts five minutes more to get ready". Imagine how the Germans reacted!

Italian waiters do take their time; adjusting expectations is a good idea. We cut them some slack when the restaurant is busy, but usually they say "subito" when you ask for the check and I'd say it is rare for us to have to wait more than 10 minutes after requesting the check. You do not have to feel rude in getting up and seeking out a waiter -- any waiter -- and re-requesting the check if it does not come in a reasonable time. They know we North Americans are an impatient lot.

Your waiter is being polite to you. Catch his or her eye or even another server and make a sign like you are signing a paper,i.e., signing a credit card slip. I am in Italy and they understand this.

Most restaurants are small operations, and the owner is the only one who computes the check and handles the payments. I think you'll find that when you've asked for the conto, it has been prepared and is waiting for you at the reception/cashier desk. The waiter will not actually bring it to the table unless asked specifically, and that 30 minute wait is the time it takes the waiter to figure out that you are a foreigner that expects something different.

While 30-40 minutes is a long time to wait, it doesn't surprise me based on my experiences. You DO have to ask, it is never brought to you without asking. And sometimes the waiter forgets or is super busy. It's not at all rude to ask a second time or get their attention as a reminder.

Coffee after dinner is not expected and in many places is thought of as rather odd. My understanding is after dinner coffee is more of an American thing - especially the whole decaf thing...

One option is to ask for the check as soon as you are done eating, expecting that you may wait awhile for it. And once you get it, there is no rush for you to pay or to leave after you have paid.

I have a slightly different take on this issue. (Please don't flame me. I am of Italian decent. Both of my parents were born there and I still have aunts, uncles and cousins there).

Indeed American restaurants "turn" tables far more quickly than Restaurants in Italy.

From a waitstaffs perspective, the "turned" table in the USA, while making for an increased workload, also virtually guarantees them the opportunity to earn more money (since tips are common here and is the main way American waitstaff earns income).

In Italy where the tip is typically small or non existent, there is no motivation for the waitstaff to turn a table as it will mean more work for the same pay.

When we were there six weeks ago there, we also endured some very slow service. Especially waiting for the bill.

I've stopped asking for the check at restaurants in Italy. I just do what the Italians do when I'm ready to leave - go to the cash register or reception desk. They know what table you were sitting at and you just pay there. Piece of cake.

whodatnation

we don't flame here. You must be thinking of some other forum.

There are several issues to take into consideration and I talked about this with a friend who owns a restaurant in Florence (i'cche c'e' c'e') and who also works as special guest chef at a country club near Atlanta in August when he closes in Florence.

1. There is a cultural issue. Bringing the check to the table quickly is considered by Italian guests bad service. Once you go to a restaurant the table is yours until closing time.
2. Staffing. Restaurant staff is very plentiful in American restaurants because the pay is low (most of income is through tips). In Italy the pay is higher by law (it's based on national bargaining contracts). On avg a waiter in America serves 4 tables and has busing staff to clean up. In Italy a waiter does everything (including busing) and often serves at least 8-10 tables.
3. Giving a check is not a priority and there is no incentive to turn tables quickly. The waiter gets no extra tip (no tip at all) for bringing you the check.
4. In fact Italian guests don't request the check at the table. They simply get up when they are ready and on the way out pay at the cash register (where the owner usually collect the money) more or less like when you go to the grocery store. There is no wait if you do so. Expecting the check at the table from the waiter is not customary in most restaurants and therefore it's extra work for the already busy waiting staff whose priority is serving food not bringing you the check. The payment part is not considered by waiters as their job. It's the owners' job at the register.

So moral of the story, when in Rome do what the Romans do. When you are done eating just get up, walk away and on your way out pay your dinner at the register. No need to wait, or to tip.

One more thing.
Don't leave the receipt in the restaurant.
You must take the receipt from the restaurant (actually from any establishment) with you and keep it for at least 100mt outside the establishment or face potential fines from the Tax Police. Issuing a receipt is mandatory and it is also mandatory for the customer to take it.
By not issuing receipts the establishment would dodge the VAT or Value Added Tax, hence the law requirement for both the business and also the customer.

Robbe' la 4 è una bischerata, dai... hai ridotto tutti i ristoranti italiani a pizzerie e trattorie. Ma ti pare che in un ristorante vero ti alzi e paghi alla cassa?

Thanks for the helpful responses everyone. I have a follow-up question (related to darioalb's, I think) for those who have suggested that we "just get up." Does that advice apply in all eating establishments? A formal restaurant? A trattoria without a front desk or register? What about a cafe/bar where you've elected to sit at a table outside? Will the person at the register know what table you're sitting at?

Mary Sue,

Vis a vis your last question. Yes, just get up, especially at a cafe/bar where you were sitting outside, and tell the cashier what you ate and drank. He/She will either find the check or verify with the other waitstaff what you ate and drank if you are unable to be clear.

In my experience, the more formal the restaurant, the more likely you will get a check at the table when you ask for it. At a trattoria, much less formal.

My experience is about the same as Laurel's.

This is so odd, but I've never gotten up in Italy after a meal to pay. Usually the waiters tell me to remain seated, and they always bring me the bill. Sometimes the bill is inside a book, just like here. Other times I just get the bill without a book. So either I put cash or credit card inside the book, or I pay directly to the waiter.

I don't see anybody paying at a register. I don't see a register. It's Not like here where it's easy to identify the pay station if it exists. I figured they walked the payment to a Cage in the back like they do here, or someplace out of sight.

I've seen my waiter walk my payment to the owner in the kitchen, but the register was behind a wall and out of sight, and there were never any lines at that register. Usually I don't see where the waiter goes, they just vanish. But I'm used to that here, so it doesn't bother me.

Sandra, perhaps you eat at fancier restaurants than I can afford.

When I am ready to leave, in Venice, Rome, and recently in Orvieto, my wife and I gather our stuff, she goes to the door and I go to the chap sitting on a stool (usually a stool) in the vicinity of the front of the eating place.

I've never been questioned.

Dario. Non e' sempre il caso, ma scommetto che il poster ha dovuto aspettare 40 minuti proprio in una trattoria casareccia dove noi italiani normalmente andiamo a pagare alla cassa quando usciamo. Nei ristoranti "veri", come dici tu, magari il conto non te lo portano in due secondi, ma non certo in 40 minuti. Ma stai tranquillo che questi non sono andati all'enoteca Pinchiorri.

Yes, more formal, fancier restaurants are likely to bring you the check at the table, and pretty quickly. They also can afford more waiting staff. At a trattoria or pizzeria, you either wait 30 min for the check at the table, or just get up and pay at the register. It's up to you. If You want fast service, you go to more expensive restaurants. You get what you pay for. In San Francisco Italian restaurants bring me the check before I even ask. I also have to pay at least $140 for me and my wife.

I don't go anywhere fancy or expensive.

I edited to say that I do pay at registers at caffe' bars. Even those vary. Some want payment upfront; others want me to pay when I leave. Rarely do they let me carry my own order to a table. They tell me to find a table outside and they bring out my order, or inside if arranged that way. I'm perfectly capable of carrying my own order. I always clean my table and return utensil, dish and glassware to the counter, and no one ever objects to that.

Thanks very much for the responses. This is making much more sense to me now.

I do find it bizarre that it would take 30-40 minutes after you've asked for the check, as you explained in your post. (We all know about the European custom that the check isn't brought until you've asked for it. That's not what's happening here, according to Mary Sue.)

When I'm in this situation, I do as the other posters do -- I get up and find the cash register/till. I don't do it automatically, at every single meal, but when I've asked for the check and have waited then longer than seems reasonable (a subjective decision, to be sure), I get up and go to the till. That encourages them to get me out of there, because they don't want me standing around at the till (I do this at home here in France too). I am very careful not to be "put out" or act impatient, just that I politely want to pay and go.

I learned a useful method for getting the check, without even talking! This trick works in Spain, Italy, Portugal, and Mexico.
And has the benefit of being polite to the waiter, and shows some level of sophistication on your part, which wait staff tends to respect.
Step 1, is catch the eye of your waiter.

Step 2 with your palm outstretched at a level visible to the waiter, make a gesture with your other hand on your open palm as if you are writing.
Generally the waiter will nod or make some other form of non verbal acknowledgment, and your bill will appear usually quickly.
Has always worked liked a charm for me!

I am like Sandra puzzled by the responses. At Italian restaurants checks for everyone were brought to the table. I am thinking $8/meal places which is not what most consider a fancy place. Actually only once, at our fanciest restaurant ($25/meal) were we told checks were not made up, pay at the cashier.