Confused about whether to tip or not in restaurants

Never tipped at restaurants in Italy in my whole life (and most of it lived there).
If you pay by credit card, they don't even have the line for gratuity like in the US.
If you pay cash, you might want to leave the change (for example if the bill is €78, you leave €80), but it's not expected and sometimes I'm afraid that would be more insulting than appreciated.
In most cases Italians don't even wait for the waiter to bring the bill. They just get up and go to the cash register to pay and walk out. My friends overthere and I always do that. We have no patience for waiting for the waiter to take our money or credit card.

A lot of Americans will leave something, especially if it was good service. But nowhere near the standard 20% is needed. As Roberto says, at most leave a couple euro or the loose change.

If you do leave something, be sure to give it to the waiter directly. Never leave it on the table like we do here.

Perhaps northern Italy is a bit different than the rest of Italy. The wait person in Venice seemed to appreciate the round up on my dinner bill.

At the end of a 10 day stay at a small hotel with half board in Asiagio, our American XC Ski group (we occupied most of the hotel's rooms), passed a basket and collected a thank you gratuity for the hotel's wait and kitchen staff. The staff seemed very appreciative the gratuity.

Could it be that Italian wait persons don't expect anything but appreciate appreciation?

If there is a cover charge then the answer is simple in my mind...no tip. Otherwise maybe a euro or two.

I don't get the link between the bread&cover charge and tipping.
Anyway I'm Italian, I live in a town where the only tourists we (seldom) see are French and nobody neither tips nor rounds up. Waiters get a living wage, that's all.

Here's a cut-and-paste for tips I've prepared for my friends on restaurants in Italy. Some of these are repetitive of what's been said above:
1. The whole “when to tip your waiter” thing will get you hilariously inconsistent advice across Italy. Here's my take: If there is a “servizio” charge included, you don’t need to leave any tip at all. If there isn’t such a charge, you might leave one or two euros per person or nothing, if all the waiter did was take your order. If he (they’re usually men) was particularly helpful and engaging, then I might leave as much as 10% (but again, not if the servizio was included).
2. If the waiter volunteers that “the tip is not included” when he hands you the bill, you’re in a place that caters to tourists and he’s trying to get a big tip out of you because he knows you’re American. It’s totally at your discretion how much, if anything, to leave.
3. If you pay with a credit card (which is fine at most restaurants), there will not be any place to add a tip. You have to tip in cash, if you’re tipping. If you’re sitting outside and the money could be swiped by someone walking by, hand the tip to your waiter directly and say “Grazie.” (pronounced “GRAHT-see-yeh”, not “GRAHT-see”. Note the final syllable.)
4. Every restaurant is required by law to give you an itemized list of your order, with the total. (It’s called a “ricevuta fiscale”). You get to take that with you, and it’s a nifty little souvenir to keep, since it has the name and usually the logo and information about the restaurant. (Technically, you’re required to have it with you when you leave the restaurant.) Writing the amount you owe on the paper tablecloth is against the law and might be a sign that they're trying to evade taxes.
5. If you’re in a hurry to pay and the waiter is nowhere to be found, you can almost always take the check up to the cash register yourself to pay. That’s actually what a lot of Italians do. If the waiter hasn’t brought you your check, you can still go up to the cash register to pay. Just show them where you were sitting, if they don't already know.
6. Italians are used to loooooong meals (often 2 hours minimum). After you order your food, the waiter will not come back to your table unless and until you catch his eye and wave at him. That’s also how you ask for your check – “il conto, per favore” (eel KOHN-toh, per fah-VOR-eh), because they will likely not bring you your check until you ask for it. Or do the universal sign for check by scribbling in your palm with an imaginary pen.

I would love any suggestions on improvements to those. Thanks.

Never been confused about this:
Good service tip: €0
Outstanding service tip: €0
I don't even wait for the check. I get up and pay at the cash register. Just tell them which table you were sitting.
It doesn't get any simpler than that. Tips to waiters is not an Italian customs just like it's not customary in America to leave a tip to the teller when you go to the bank.

Oh my gosh, you mean it's not expected to leave tips for bank tellers in the US? I've been leaving 10 percent for years. No wonder I'm so broke.

Larry, considering they are only paying you a half of one percent on your money, you are really in the hole, LOL!

Thanks to Roberto and Michael for those posts. I regularly have to show such info to my wife who just can't get over my not tipping waiters when we are in Italy.

As I have said several times when this topic has come up, I can't get over some feeling of discomfort at not leaving a tip, except, of course, when service has been bad. However, it is true that you don't see Italians (or Germans or a lot of other Europeans) tipping. Unfortunately, we have begun to see cc receipts with a line for tips, mostly in very heavily touristed areas like Sorrento. We even had one waiter there, rather brazenly, tell us not to forget it. I suspect he saved that for Americans.

I am gonna throw in what I think may be a not too popular response here... if you are American and out to dinner in a popular part of Italy, the waiter has come to expect a tip from you. Does that mean you have to leave a tip? No, hell, you don't have to in the US (as a waiter in college I and my co-workers got a fair amount of that crap). But is it expected of you, specifically, as an American tourist? At this point, yes it is. So, you don't have to, but they will be upset if you don't, because they are used to American's tipping.

But is it expected of you, specifically, as an American tourist? At this point, yes it is. So, you don't have to, but they will be upset if you don't, because they are used to American's tipping.

I understand what you are saying, and it is true (in many places in Europe, not just Italy), that SOME waiters think they can get a tip from you. But to say "expect" is not accurate in the sense that they are somehow entitled to one. And my experience is that those brazen waiters are found more in popular tourist restaurants, like on main plazas, not in ordinary family restaurants (whether they cater to tourists or not). If someone pressures you, you don't have to tip just because you do in the US and you don't have to feel guilty if they get all huffy about it. Of course, that is easier said than done for many people.

I have occasionally left a one euro tip because I had an entertaining evening.

Here is an example.

Late afternoon, early evening, not yet dinner time. After a long day of walking around my daughter and I decide it is time for a glass of cold white wine and decided to sit in Campo die Fiori at a cafe - shudder, yes we were paying the extra to sit and watch and it was close to our rooms. We were right on the edge so we were privy to the activities of the gentlemen who work for the cafe/restaurant whose job it is to get customers. unlike most of the ones who were dressed in suits he was in jeans and a shirt and he was quite entertaining and fun to watch. We sat for an hour watching the crowds, talking, joking a bit with him, then we left. As we left I gave him a euro and he was shocked and tried hard to give it back to me. He asked why i was tipping and i just said because I had a good time sitting there watching you and talking to you.

Americans who don't understand foreign cultures and create the expectation that they are easy marks don't do any of us a service. Tips are required in the US because that is how we compensate waiters who in many states are paid less than half minimum wage. To eat and not tip is to steal there service. It is not a great system, but it is what it is . In Europe waiters are paid a living wage and tips are not part of the culture To give tips just helps create an expectation in touristy areas that Americans are profligate and a bit naive.

It isn't the custom. We shouldn't be doing it. When in Rome . . .

jkc, I appreciate your intent, but he might have been more insulted than shocked. Imagine if someone came up to you after watching you do your job and gave you a dollar and thirty cents, saying that they enjoyed watching you. Don't you think you might be offended?