best way to get from Milan near Duomo/La Scala to meet arrival at Malpensa by 10am?

Malpensa is far from the city. I doubt there are cheap hotels in the city center that would offer a free shuttle (or any shuttle at all). The fastest (and cheapest) way to get to the airport is actually with the Malpensa express trains from the Milano N.Cadorna station, which takes only 35 min and costs, I think, €10 (or €12 max). The N.Cadorna station is near the Castello Sforzesco (Sforza Castle), not far from the Duomo. Check Google maps to see the location and also to find a nearby hotel (zoom in and hotel names will appear, or enter "hotels" in the search box).
The schedule of the Malpensa express trains is below:
www.malpensaexpress.it
Or you can go by taxi, but the taxi fare is €90 and I doubt you'll get there in less than 45-50 min.

I like staying near Milano Centrale at the Hotel Berna. There are also trains to Malpensa from Milano Centrale every half hour. They take a little longer (~50 minutes) because they make a couple of stops along the way. It costs the same. Getting to/from La Scala can be by taxi or Metro.
So I think finding a hotel you are comfortable with in central Milan is the first order of business. One of the two stations (Cadorna or Centrale) will be close enough to walk to, or at the very least a short, inexpensive taxi ride away. When are you going and what are you seeing?

You can spend the night either near the Duomo/La Scala or near the train station. From the Duomo, take the Metro (one entrance is literally in the Piazza of the Duomo) to Milano Centrale and then take the Malpensa Express to the airport. Or, take the Metro to Cadorna stop and take the train to the airport from there (less time-consuming).

I'm looking at seeing "Girl of the West" because it fits into my schedule. I am also thinking about going even earlier (ouch my budget!) to see the opera on the 10th... then tour around Milan. I have plans to stay in the country until June 3 so i hesitate to extend on the front end (would rather extend on the back end and maybe spend an extra night at some farm in Tuscany!)

I don't know how late the opera will go and don't want to start my group trip being exhausted!

Ok I see the train schedules ITHANK YOU!
I need to keep the hotel expense LOW LOW LOW for this couple of days in Milan. I see a small place near the March Metro Station... is there a safety concern anywhere that I should be aware of? $46/night would help me with the lavish plans i have in Bellagio, Venice and Portofino!

"La Fanciulla del West" has a run time of 2 hours and 20 minutes according to La Scala. Starts at 8 pm, so you should be snug in your bed by 11 pm. Take a 9 am train to the airport and you should be fine.

I am not familiar with the neighborhood around Marche, but it is outside the standard tourist beat. The Marche Metro station is on on the brand new M5 line. It is just 3 stops from Porta Garibaldi train station where you can get the Malpensa Express train to the airport. Trains go at 5 and 35 past the hour, take 41 minutes and cost 12 euro.
To get to La Scala, take the M5 one stop to Zara and change to the M3 line to Duomo.
You might want to get a multi-day Milan transit pass at any tabacchi. A 2-day ticket is 8.25 euro.

looking at the map for the express train to MXP - "Milano N Cadorna Station" i don't mean to be dull, but don't want to be at almost the right train station.
i see "Milano Nord Cadorna" which has a little blue train icon rather than the red "M" icon on the map and looks like a street car station...? there are also red "M" metro stations "Cardona FN M2" and "Cardona FN M1" Which station do I want for the Express to MXP? thanks!

thank you Sam. I posted another topic asking about safety of neighborhoods, since I'm a woman traveling this leg alone. Want to avoid a stupid moment (had them before).

There are 2 Malpensa Express trains, one to/from Cadorna station, and one to/from Milano Centrale station. The one that is to/from Milano Centrale also stops at Milano Porta Garibaldi station. That is your closest station and the one I would use (assuming you stay near Marche).
Edit- On the link that Roberto sent you, in the "From" box, click on the button and you will see Milano Porta Garibaldi as one of the stations to get the Malpensa Express. Going to N. Cadorna, you would need to change to the M2 line to get there.

A small side question. Is your travel group starting at Malpensa? Or could you meet at Centrale? Just about everything has to pass through Milan.

"i see "Milano Nord Cadorna" which has a little blue train icon rather than the red "M" icon on the map and looks like a street car station...? there are also red "M" metro stations "Cardona FN M2" and "Cardona FN M1" Which station do I want for the Express to MXP? thanks!"

They are all the same station (or to be more correct, different parts of the same station). Cadorna is both a Metro station and a train station. At Cadorna, you can get Metro line 1 ("M1" - usually red on maps), Metro line 2 ("M2" - usually green on maps), or the Trenord Malpensa Express service to the airport ("Milano Nord Cadorna").

Note that you can switch between M1 and M2 at this station without paying a separate fee (free transfer). Trenord service is not part of the Metro, so that needs a separate ticket (no free transfer).

Milan has many train stations, and they will all have "Milano" in the name - Milano Centrale, Milano Cadorna, Milano Porta Garabaldi, Milano Porta Genova, etc. This confuses people who hop out at the first "Milano" station they see - make sure you head to the correct one to get your departing train, and make sure you get off at the correct one when arriving.

My tip for what Michael described is to focus on the station before. If going to E, look for D. So that you are both prepared to get off and you the right station. And if for some reason you miss the station, most of the time you can get off at the next station, cross over, and come back. Done that more than once.