3 days in Naples or Sorrento

We liked Sorrento a lot but there is not much reason to be there other than access to Pompeii and Capri.
And it’s a pain to get to.

I would stay in Naples. Since you are arriving and departing from Naples, keep it simple.
I’d probably want to be IN Naples night before departure anyway.

Visit Pompeii and see the Archeological Museum
Maybe skip Capri and see more of Naples. Or consider Ischia

I haven’t been to Naples but have been accumulating info for a hopeful visit next spring- here is a thread I have saved
https://community.ricksteves.com/travel-forum/italy/napoli-finally

I’d lean toward Naples. It’s kind of an intense city, especially compared to Sorrento, but I think experienced travelers such as yourselves will appreciate it more. Sorrento itself is kind of dull, but it’s a fantastic jumping off point and on a busy itinerary is the sort of chill home base that can recharge your batteries. Logistically for your objectives, there is more upside for Naples.

Glad to hear you’re seeing both Pompeii and Herculaneum! I always like to point out that Herculaneum is open late in season, and the late afternoon is a great time to see it.

Month and year? Pompeii and Capri both take a full day, so where you sleep makes less difference. Naples has much more history and art than Sorrento. Naples can be a hot, crowded, and gritty city. But some visitors also want to glance at the Amalfi Coast. (Positano, Amalfi, Ravello, for examples.) Note that Sorrento is built on a cliff, and thus not really a beach town. But many people choose Sorrento for its purpose-built resort atmosphere, perhaps more relaxing. It can be impossible to fly out of Rome from some of these distant locations.

Sorrento will be more relaxing after a day of exploring, but Naples is a closer train ride to both Pompeii (slightly shorter) and Herculaneum (much shorter). However that saved time might be eaten up by the time it takes you to get to the train station in Naples as compared to Sorrento. We spent 2 weeks in Sorrento and the only regret was not spending more than 1 day in Naples. It's an intense city and you may love it or you may hate it, but it is like no other city I've ever experienced.

*If Pompeii and Herculaneum are of interest, I suggest a 1 hour visit to Oplontis as well. It's one train station north of the Pompeii Scavi station. The Villa of Oplontis is a rich guys house that was also buried by Vesuvius. It's a hidden gem. To tie all the sites together I suggest you also make time for the Archeological Museum in Naples.

We loved Sorrento. We stayed in a cliffside hotel with a sea view room near the Villa Comunale Park which has amazing views and an elevator down to the harbor. The lights across the Bay of Naples at night look like a jeweled necklace, and the sunsets over the Bay of Naples in Sorrento are gorgeous. We enjoyed walking to the Sorrento restaurants and shops in the Centro Storico area of Sorrento. It is easy to take a ferry from Sorrento to Capri for the day and another day we took the train to Pompeii. The night before we flew home from Naples we stayed in Naples, and that afternoon we also toured the Archaeology Museum which was good to see after we had been to Pompeii.

Thank you everyone, all the advise is so helpful! We will be there the first week of October, 7-12th. We decided to stay in Sorrento as it will be the end of 10 days in Croatia. We found a lovely B&B to stay, Divina House.