Julia,
Your RS profile doesn't tell us much about what you like to do, so it's hard to recommend too many specifics. Why recommend a great hillwalk when you prefer art museums!? Tell us a bit about what you want to DO during the travel!
Are you set on staying in Kilkenny city, or do you mean Kilkenny the county? I recently stayed in Graiguenamana (that is spelled many ways in Ireland) and did day trips into Kilkenny to see the castle, etc. It was much more relaxing, as Kilkenny felt like a big city full of commuters and tourists!
Also if you're set on that itinerary above, I'd suggest 2 nights Dingle and 2 Ring of Kerry (Kenmare or wherever that ends up being.....). As the previous commenter says, one night anywhere doesn't give you much to see besides the steering wheel!
re: Oughterard - if you're still looking in that area, consider the Leenane Hotel in Leenaun (another place spelled many ways!). I've stayed there and at Delphi Resort nearby - that area is so lovely!! It's where they filmed The Field . If you do stay in that area, be sure to check out the Killary Fjord cruise. I've done it three times, and still go back each time I am in the area.
Also near Maam Cross there is a little house/shop/photo gallery/cafe that is run by a father and daughter and is a joy to discover! The dad was a hillwalker before he was injured, and his photos are fantastic! I spent hours there just gabbing with them one day!
Susan
Expat in Waterville, Ring of Kerry