Italy or Ireland

Which 8 nights (what time of year)? What are your interests? Why Ireland or Italy?
One thing I will say is that you can see a lot more of Ireland in 8 days than you can of Italy. As evidence, I will point out that the Heart of Ireland RS tour is only 7 days, while the Heart of Italy is 9 (I was surprised there was an Italy so short, TBH).
If you decide on Italy, I recommend contacting Sarah Murdoch (former RS Italy guide), who does custom tours. If you take a look at her Facebook page, she had some recent posts regarding a multi-generational custom family tour that she did. https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1GUoznqhnN/

You need a car for Ireland but nor for Italy.

You don't "need" a car for Ireland, but with 9 people, if you want to travel by car, you would need more than one car.

Adore Ireland but for first trip I’d go with Italy.

With such a short amount of time I would pick just two cities in either country to base yourself in for four days each. In Italy, you could fly into Venice then train to Rome and fly home from there. In Ireland, you could fly into Dublin then train to Galway, or Belfast. The only problem with Galway is that you would have to train back to Dublin to fly home. I think Italy would be more of a focus on history, but I’m sure the younger ones would enjoy the canals and boats in Venice. In Ireland, you might get out into nature more, especially around Galway. There are certainly other towns you could choose, but these choices are fairly easy, and quick. You don’t want to be spending a lot of time getting to the next place instead of seeing the sights.

I'm assuming that the trip you were asking about last year did not happen. Do those 8 nights include the transatlantic flights? In that case, you only have 6 nights in the country you select. If that is the case, and you choose Italy, pick one city that you can easily day trip from. Any of the big 3 - Venice, Florence, Rome - are good for at least 3-4 days. Then a couple of day trips to nearby towns. Or pick 2 of the 3 and forget any day trips. It would help to know the time of year.

Any thoughts?

With your group I would suggest 2 places in Italy.

Depending which cities you choose and how you allocate the 8 nights, a day trip may be possible.

Moving that many people that far for just 8 nights is a lot of work for limited return.

Is the 8 nights truly carved in stone?

The Family Tour you contemplated previously looks so much better.

Good luck

I would pick Italy and do Florence and Rome.

If you are traveling during the summer I would head north to Ireland. It’s too hot in Italy in June, July, and August for us.
If you choose Ireland check out Bulters Tours. They can customize an itinerary for you and they have vans of varying sizes with a driver/tour guide.
We were looking to use them in 2020 but that never happened. Still have them on our radar for a future family trip. Just waiting for the grandkids to be a little older.

Is language is a problem? They speak something that can be understood as English in Ireland. If your group has no international experience; Ireland is easy and familiar.

With respect to train vs. car. Yes, you will need 2 cars - or - your will need 9 train tickets, (these add up quickly).

We have been to both Ireland and Italy. We loved them both. Safe travels.

Train tickets in Ireland, purchased in advance, are very inexpensive. And they have discounted family tickets for 2 adults and up to four children. Depending on where you choose to go in Ireland, the bus may be the only available mode of transport. Fares are also quite low and discounted for children. See Transport for Ireland for more info: https://www.transportforireland.ie/#

Ireland could be frustrating with or without a car for a group that size. I agree on Rome and Florence. Stay at a centrally located hotel in Florence and people can easily do their own thing there instead of being glued to the entire group.

I agree with G3rryCee: Time of year would be a major factor for me.

As this is a first time trip for your group, the time of year will impact where you'll want to go to get the most enjoyment for all ages. I've been to both countries many times and love them both (though I'm Irish so partial to Ireland :-) ) For 8 nights, and with a variety of ages, you will want to narrow it down to a couple of cities to get the most out of your first trip. I'd avoid Italy in summer as it's hot and crowded but spring and fall are lovely. Ireland is, imo, beautiful spring through fall, though I don't mind grey or rain. Some had mentioned transportation. While it's true Italy is better connected throughout the country with trains, you can easily get from Dublin, Cork, Galway, Belfast by train or bus in Ireland (just the countryside is more difficult to access in Ireland--doable but cumbersome especially with 9 people.) I'd suggest not renting a car in either place as you will want to, I'm sure, visit the "must sees" as it is a first visit and many are in cities. Driving is fine but parking can often be a pain. Honestly I think whichever you chose will be a good choice. Both countries have so much to offer and are beautiful. Keep us posted on where you picked!

Did one intergenerational trip for 9 to Ireland in August 2023, and one for 7 to Italy in May 2025. As others have stated time of year is a big factor. For both of these trips the weather was spectacular - mild, sunny, perfect (maybe a little Irish luck there). Other big factor could be transportation preferences. In Ireland we rented 3 cars (a bit of a challenge for me to drive, but not so stressful for the other 2 drivers lol) - for this method I highly recommend a dedicated "navigator" for each vehicle. In Italy we did a mix of train and rented cars in Tuscany which worked well.
Feel free to PM me if you want additional info on our itineraries. Good luck and enjoy this time with your family. It is truly a gift.

You need a car for Ireland

You do not need a car. I just had a fantastic trip in Ireland this past May with no car.

https://community.ricksteves.com/travel-forum/trip-reports/solo-in-ireland-may-2025-my-trip-report

This post has little to do with the choice between countries. I have been to both and prefer Ireland by a very slight margin.

You mentioned navigator if you chose to rent a car. Which BTW is my preferred choice in any country. That provides you with a flexible schedule. But the point is, that if you do not get a GPS in your rental, you will regret it. Why would you want someone in your party to be looking at a map, and perhaps misinterpret it, instead of enjoying the looking out the window?