Tipping Question

When they are making change, they make it with the tip added in. So, if your bill was 22€ and you give them a 50€ bill, you can say, 23 or 24€ and you get the appropriate change back. It has nothing to do with you being female, but they don't want you leaving change on the table. People will walk by and take it. This is just how it is done, though it is not normal for them to ask. If they do, I would say zero. It is not appropriate to ask. Though a tip is normal, it is also ok to leave nothing if you were not happy. In this case, you were not happy. Tell them this if you like. I know I would.
Not sure where you are going, but have never had that happen to me and I go out solo all the time.

A service charge in Germany is not the same as a tip. The wait staff do not ever get the service charge. This goes to the restaurant.

What I would do is say "give me my change and then I will decide how much to leave."

Then leave nothing.

And leave a negative review on the restaurants TripAdvisor page.

When I go into a restaurant, I'm always pleasant and respectful. I expect the waiter to be the same or at least professional. I don't let them inimidate me.

Normally, I round up or leave about 10%. But if they were rude like this, I'd leave nothing.

Oh, and I now pay with a credit card. When I do, I will tell them how much extra to add for a tip. But not if they ask.

Oh, and I now pay with a credit card. When I do, I will tell them how much extra to add for a tip. But not if they ask.

I agree with both Ms. Jo and Frank II. It is easier (IMO) to pay with a credit card, and then you just tell them the total amount to add to the card machine. This system is common in many countries (I am in Romania right now, and it's the same system). But as Frank noted, they should not be asking for a tip. And feel free to ask them to wait while you calculate the tip. I've been doing that a lot in Romania, as I am not that familiar with the money here. They will wait. 😊

One other note about Germany. When you do leave a tip, it is considered polite to thank the server at the time you give the tip. It makes it more personal.

Not really familiar with Austria, but in Germany I never had this type of conversation. Definitely not because you’re female - at best, because you are presumed to be from the US.
For CC‘s, the preset tip rates have somewhat swapped over from the US, and since effectively only non-Europeans pay by CC (most Europeans will use cash or EU Debit), no local really notices - and they might be tempted to ask the same question to foreign customers anyway. Or they are just trying to offer you a more familiar experience than the normal one of doing the math yourself.
Say the amount you want to give as tip (service charge is different, as noted, but should already be included in Germany), like 28€ for a 25,90€ bill. If they are rude about it give nothing. Or even better, just ask why they are asking you in advance - it could just be a weird cultural misunderstanding.

Round off to the nearest whole euro. Period.

If they're asking for tips, or don't make change, they know your American and are ripping you off. Tipping is not required. Anywhere. If you want to tip, that's on you. But it's YOUR choice.

KGC: Nothing personal, but rounding up to the nearest whole Euro for a 37,90€ bill is probably worse than doing nothing - a 0,10€ tip is just a deliberate insult. I guess you mean rounding up to the nearest appropriate value (in my example I feel like 40€ would be)?

l-b_m, I have often left 10 cent tips .... but always to make a point. Yes, it is insulting, and I doubt that's what KGC meant or intended.

Mr Ɛ
I was just unsure if KGC was not writing what they actually meant and it could have sparked further confusion or misunderstandings. If you are deliberate about it to make a point - go for it.

In over 40 years of travel to Europe, only once was I ever asked for a tip, and it was in Germany in 2018, at a popular tourist restaurant in Berlin, Dickie Wirtin...I was caught off guard, and I gave the waiter a tip, more generous than I would have otherwise given. And I felt a bit foolish for doing it. FWIW I have always been a tipper in Europe, of the "round up to the nearest euro or two" variety, as long as the waiter assures me that they are allowed to keep the tip. If it goes to the restaurant, I don't tip.

I agree with Frank II completely on how to deal with it.

Thanks all, I feel more confident now and I will follow the advice you have given.

l-b_m, you and I are on the same page about tipping and about what KGC probably meant. I either tip fairly well by European standards or nothing depending on the service. It's a different attitude here, so what I do is common. The 20 cent tips I save for the US where the message is understood. But it's rare that I do it.

I had my first "tip is not included" experience recently. I ate at a Vietnamese restaurant in the Charlottenburg area of Berlin. The server spoke sparse English until delivering the check which was laid on the table with server saying, "Tip is not included." I tipped as I normally would in Berlin -- in the 5-10% range.

It's not an insult, it's not a tip. You just don't want to deal with small change.

You want to leave them more, OK, but if you don't, don't. I don't want to deal with coins less than one euro. I still get them, mostly from shops, but the waiter is not going to be upset if you don't leave a tip. He gets paid a wage that doesn't take into account tips. And he shouldn't be insulted if he doesn't get one.

I had a meal yesterday in a popular tourist destination. The tab was 24.80. I paid 25 euro and nothing was said except, "Thank you, Have a nice day." (Danke, und schoen tag.) That's all that was expected. Nothing more. The .20 euro wasn't a tip, it was a way to prevent the waiter making change and me dealing with it. We both knew that. That's how it works.

I have been to Germany maybe 8 or 9 times over 25 years, the last being a year ago. And to be honest, yes, I noticed the "prompted tip" more the last trip than ever.

Yes, like many others, I used to pay cash, then rounded up or added a couple euro to a dinner bill (never more than 10%, much less if we are talking a 50 euro or more meal). The advent of more credit card usage has put a kink into it, there you need to tell the server what to input for the total amount, if you want to leave a tip. Of course many do this with cash as well, handing them a 50 euro note, and asking for some amount back. I do think this goes against the grain of many Americans, they prefer to make a calculation in private, then either leave money on the table, or write an amount on a credit card slip, discussing the tip with a server, is a bit different.

I can say, that a couple of the servers mentioned it, as if I was not aware I could do that, not really being pushy, just prompting. But yes, some were more direct than others. I do have to say, that most of this was in the more tourist trod towns, but not necessarily just the tourist trap places.

Some experiences that stood out?

My credit card has a PIN and is Pin Priority, meaning even if I tap, if over 50€, I have to input my pin, if I insert my card, also have to input my PIN. One restaurant though, they brought the POS device, not sure if the server did something, but a slip with a tip line printed out, just never have had that happen.

Oktoberfest. In the tents is basically a cash business, especially if you are getting just a beer. Last year, and I hear this year, rather than a simple price, a liter of beer cost some odd amount...so like 15.10€ or 14.60€. Servers are loathe to give small change, so you, or they, or who knows who after 2 or 3 liters, will round your change.

And, like I said, probably 3 places in the month where I was directly asked about the tip.

My advice, it really is somewhat a custom to leave a small tip in Germany. Basically, you need to take the initiative, and either leave the amount you wish, expecting no change; ask only for the amount you want back in change; or tell them directly what amount to put into the POS device for a credit card.

Aside from the insidious "discretionary service charge" automatically added to bills in England, this past Sunday I was asked for a tip for the very first time in Europe, at the Inselbrau restaurant on Fraueninsel. Against my better judgement I left a fair tip, but there was an entertaining fracas going off between a different server and customer which more than my made up for my regret.

In some countries (many, all?), the law requires that the service charge, if any, be printed in an obvious fashion in the menu. That's true in Budapest, for instance, and I have gotten used to looking before I order. Then, the tip screen will come up on the credit card machine and often as not the server will point out that the service charge is already in the bill.

Shanah Tovah U'Metukah
שָׁנָה טוֹבָה וּמְתוּקָה

And a happy and healthy new year to you as well, Mr E and all readers.

Sitting in Stuttgart starting a three week trip. Since I prefer to pay by card, I always tell the waiter to a specific amount "for you" as a was told many years ago to directly hand any tip directly to the waiter. I would love to see more restaurants in the US go paper free and contactless billing where we add any tip before a card is tapped.

We travel to Germany every year and have never been asked about a tip. When we pay with cash,we tell them how much change we want back,thus letting them know what their tip is. We do the same when we pay with the credit card. Very occasionally they give our change back then we give them their tip. I'm amazed that you had someone ask about it.

In Germany, to use the figure quoted already above as the example, 37,90 Euro, I would leave , ie tell the waiter directly 40 Euro or 41 Euro paying him directly in cash. Likewise in France saying Vous faites 40 Euro or 41Euro. (I'll make up my mind then and there.)

This time in Paris I actually did hear a waiter at a restaurant across from Nord who happened to be my waiter too, say to two different British couples , all seniors, with whom he in the course their dinner and his service say to them (he spoke and chatted with them in English), " are you going leave something for me?" as they were paying with the cc.

I was pretty stunned at this guy's temerity, both times. When it was my turn to pay, as I pulled out my cc, he did not ask that question. Maybe because in the course of the dinner, I had engaged in no chatting and I had spoken in French.

Sorry, but the US seems to have arrived in Germany. I fellow traveler arrived in Frankfurt this morning and stopped for a coffee. The pay point presented him with his bill and just like the US asked if he wanted to leave a tip.

jkh: yeah, for CC in particular this has really swapped over - especially since people from the US are more likely to pay by card than locals, and thus encounter a familiar experience
In all honesty, it might be a default setting from the CC reader company - I have already been told by waiters to just skip over it, they found it to be intrusive themselves, apparently.

I tend to agree with the above, ".....it might be a default setting from the CC reader company." But, no matter how it's presented, I simply say, "round up to €xx". Simple, easy and I've never have had any issues doing so. The servers are always appreciative.

Hearing of the strikes against civilians in 🇺🇦 Ukraine the evening before upsets my day and casts a shadow over personal enjoyment. Requests for tips fall into the P.I.A. category (pain in a....). I deal with much more problematic issues several times a day. I also reject the premises that 10% of all the tourists in Europe (Americans) have so much sway over local cultures that they can cause major shifts in local cultures. I really don't think we are that important in such matters. I think Europeans are creative enough, greedy enough and intelligent enough to come up with this stuff with out coaching from across the Atlantic.

Requests for tips fall into the P.I.A. category (pain in a....).

Same for me, a nuisance, but one that must be kept in proper perspective.

If asked for a tip, simply say "no". Pay the bill with a smile, and never return to that establishment.