When will you be traveling? The length of the period between purchase and travel is a big factor since prices rise as tickets sell.
If you buy the right day passes for regional train travel - at the station - the two of you can do those 3 legs for about €110 total. The Bayern/Bavaria ticket would be involved for those 3 trips; on trip #1, you'd need additional local RMV tickets to reach Bavaria (less than €20/2 from FRA.) The RMV is a local transit authority for the Frankfurt area. You won't find much if anything about it on Rick Steves or the DB website. Here's the webpage but it's somewhat impenetrable. Don't waste a lot of time on it. The idea is to just buy the RMV and Bayern Tickets from an airport station ticket machine and go.
You might want to reconsider the Black Forest by car. From Ulm you can get there cheaply by day pass, and once you're there, train travel around the entire BF is free of charge when you stay in a participating KONUS town. For details, click on the Konus flyer on the following page:
http://www.blackforest-tourism.com/info/KONUS