Tipping in France - 'Just leave a few coins'

I left anywhere from 2 to 4 euros for really good service. Only a few times did we only leave 2 euros. We left 6 euros once but the guy serving us was so awesome it deserved it.

I may be wrong. We have only been once last fall. I hope I was doing it right.

We had lunch with a Parisian friend and I asked him about this age-old question. He said what has often been said here, round it up and leave the change if you were happy, or leave 1 or 2 euro if service was exceptional. Actually handing it to your server is a nice gesture too.

I would probably pay 80 total, if I had it in exact bills. Rick's suggestion of 5% for exceptional service would bring you to 82. A service charge is already built into the total.

You don't have to feel guilty if you leave absolutely nothing on the table.
You can walk away, scot-free, and nobody will be chasing you down the street because you "forgot" to leave a tip. You won't get any dirty looks, either, unless you make the mistake of eating in one of those down-and-dirty tourist traps.
I've been living here since 2008, and it took me a long time to get over this habit.

It's important to realize that waiters make a very good living, including: paid transportation passes, paid vacations, paid insurance and full medical benefits, a full meal (with alcohol) per shift, full retirement benefits and allocations for their children's schooling and related expenses. They take home enough money to pay the rent, utilities, buy food and clothing and have some fun when they're not working. They work hard, but are trained to handle the stress, so you don't have to feel sorry for "the guy who's handling the entire restaurant by himself."

If someone really goes out of his way to help you solve some kind of problem, if you want to leave him 1 or 2 EU, you can, but it might embarrass him and you really don't have to - a smile and a handshake are appreciated just as much. It's the waiter's job to see that you are happy, so no monetary reward is necessary.

Where do I apply Chex?

There is a risk that an obliged tip can be seen as patronizing. If it is a gesture of appreciation you can indeed pay 80 euros and say “keep the chance” or “c’est bien” (or something like that). More important for the waiters is that you want to come back or do word of mouth. So they do their best you will have a pleasant time, as that guarantees their income and ofcourse make their work more pleasant too.

With a husband who works in the restaurant business, I can assure you that the "extra" tips are appreciated (and they aren't making all THAT much money, although yes they are better cared for than in the States. And of course they themselves also contribute to their insurance, transport pass, retirement, etc etc., it's not that it's all handed to them on a silver platter. Plus they work insane hours in most places -- the 35-hour workweek does NOT apply in restaurants, and while they may be supposed to get a break in the afternoon between lunch and dinner services, the one who comes home to me works from about 11:30 in the morning until 1:30 in the morning five days a week with office work in between his shifts on the floor. That's a lot of hard work, and with rent being so high here in Paris at least, even being a two-income, no child family, we don't really have very much money left over for very many "fun" things. I'm not complaining, my husband loves his job, and we chose this life -- but just trying to paint a realistic picture).

On a 78-euro bill, I probably normally would leave 80 euros -- unless I was at a place where I'm a regular, or I was really happy with the service, where I probably would leave either 5 euros on top of the 78, or maybe even 85. But that's pretty exceptional.

Rounding up to 80, you look courteous and appreciative, while not looking like an American sucker who added 10% or 20%!

: ) And yes, to emphasize again, it's not required to leave ANYthing. But it is nice if you're able to do so.

Kim--what's your take on Dave's suggestion to hand money directly. Knowing the French discretion about anything to do with money, I thought it was too forward/direct. Maybe I'm wrong. You and your husband are the best placed of all to answer.

I always wonder why American are so anxious to graft this filthy habit of tipping onto countries where that is not the norm. It is hideous that in the US waiters are often not paid adequately and customers are supposed to make up the difference which they may or may not do. What about that is desirable in any way? Why would we want to impose it on a culture that pays its workers without expectation of customers volunteering extra to do so? American big tippers just create expectations that the arm should be put on other American tourists. 'A few coins' has generally meant change from a cup of coffee or rounding up because it is convenient.

I was in Europe for 3 weeks in May. There were two occasions (both in Paris) where I felt the waiter was angling for a tip. One was in a cafe (not full of tourists!) and we just ordered cappuccinos. It took forever to get them and they were very fancy (and not even hot). He explained that they took so long because he he'd made them specially for us. Yeah, we just wanted ordinary HOT cappuccinos, kay? No one else was getting anything special. We did not tip. I wonder if clueless Americans have been leaving tips "just because" so he's come to expect it. I hope that isn't becoming a thing. I also think Americans are more likely to pay in cash, which makes it easier to leave a tip, where other nationalities are using their cards.

On the other hand, a few times we had such outstanding service that we rounded up rather than waiting for change.

By the way, I have some French clients (they've been living in Seattle less than a year) and before I left we had a short discussion about tipping, and they both said absolutely no need, and don't do it or the restaurants and cafes will come to expect it, and no one wants that.

Of course, there are some waiters in France that angle for tips, especially if the patrons are Americans. There are Americans who like my husband think that they should tip at the same level in France as they do in the USA and I understand completely if waiters in heavily touristed areas come to expect tips from Americans. I have even seen a tip jar on a counter of a crepe stand in the 6th arrondissement. I round up -- so leaving 80 euros for a 78 euro meal, but my husband would probably "round up" to 90 euros, which is less than what he would leave in the US where is generally a 20% tipper. It is difficult for him to walk away without leaving a tip. That being said, I am usually the one to ask for the check when we are in France and I tip by rounding up by up to 5 euros depending on the bills in my wallet. I think that what a lot of Americans find odd is the idea of leaving 2 euros for a 78 euro tab and leaving 1 euro for a 9 euro tab because of the disproportionality of the "tip" for the 78 euro tab when compared to US standards. It's very hard for me because I tend to tip generously in the US but I just took a deep breath and accepted rounding up as the norm in France and do that when I am there. So far, no server has chased me down on the street to ask why I left so little as happened to me once in New York City when I left no tip because the service was horrendous.

accepted rounding up as the norm in France and do that when I am
there.

Or you could accept that tipping is not the "norm" and not do it.

k2 capuccinos in France are entirely different from what you get in Italy -- it usually involves Chocolate shavings and whipped cream in Paris. The local equivalent is a 'creme' which is quite similar to an Italian capuccino or Austrian melange. So yeah they are a specialty drink. But no begging waiters don't need to be gratified. This is what comes of American who don't conform to local norms; they just make it unpleasant for everyone who follows them.

@k2, I understand that tipping is not the norm and so I do not tip, but I do round up which I have been told is another norm. So, if I pay by credit card, I don't add a percentage to the bill or leave additional cash as a tip, but if I pay with cash and, for example, the bill is 21.50 and I have 22 euros, I do not wait for the change. Nor do I leave another 1 or 2 euros which is what I would do in the US. And if I have exact change, I don't worry about having to leave more to include a tip.

On our first several trips to France, I probably tipped excessively high, just because I was so used to tipping that I couldn't imagine not tipping. Then I had a discussion with my French teacher, who had been born in France and lived there for many years before coming to the US. She said the French don't tip; period. So now, unless there's a special reason to do otherwise, I at most round up or leave a euro or 2. On a trip this Spring we had dinner with an American couple who have been living in France for over 10 years. Dinner was excellent, and so was the service (it was a family-run restaurant). When I asked our dining companions whether we should give a significant tip, they said no, if you do so it's like you're throwing money at them; that is, you're flaunting your money.

janettravels44, I drank many cappuccinos in Paris (and elsewhere) and that was the only one that was so elaborate. All the rest were what I expected, not a 'specialty'. And it really annoyed me that the thing wasn't even hot! Looked beautiful but meh.

There is a lot to gain if you can leave your own habits at home and open your mind for the habits (and so accept them as they are) in other countries. So when in Rome, do as the Romans do - or in other words travel with an open mind or at least try to do so.....(and if you can't so be it).

If you're seated outside on the terrace, and want to leave a tip, it's safer to hand it directly to the waiter - sometimes there's a little tray for change, sometimes not. The reason for this is that many times people passing by will help themselves to whatever money is left unattended on a table.

The good restaurant jobs are the ones where the employees stay until they retire.
And since it's now become practically impossible to fire anyone, the employer couldn't get a better employee even if he wanted to.
I live near 3 restaurants that are owned by the same company. Two of the restaurants will hire anyone, and the staff changes every other week, because nobody can stand to work there. The other is strictly "reglo" and people have been working there happily for years.
There are a lot of new, inexperienced chefs in town who don't always play by the rules. Many of them only last a couple of years before they move on to another venture. It's very easy for them to lose money if their employees are unhappy.

Wil, I love your response! Good advice for all of us.

The post from Kim is spot on. You can use it for some of the other countries in Europe too, as it makes very valid points.

Don't leave the tip on the table. The tipping is done when the server collects for your bill and is making change.

Hmmm. I almost always leave any tip on the table, as many people do. One thing that I never do though is leave the money for the check on an outside café table.

It's different in France from Jo's Germany: you say you don't want change when paying ( just say "c'est bien"), or leave the change in the little plastic tray, or leave it on the table. Handling money directly hand to hand is a bit forward.

Edit: Listen to Jo for Germany ;) I remember being surprised at the difference when we were in Frankfurt.

Listen to Bets. She will know better than anyone.

My husband drinks capuccinos in Italy and absentmindedly has ordered them in Paris a couple of times and each time they were these whip cream icks. The French have a perfectly good name for this type drink i.e. 'creme' and so many restaurants distinguish the capuccino and make it a specialty tourist trap. Of course the price will be on the menu, but people rarely look at the menu when ordering what they think is a standard drink.

We just returned from Europe on Tuesday, in Barcelona and France. It was really hard in Barcelona not leaving a large tip, since it's habit. But after observing many other people pay their checks, we found that a great majority paid with a credit card, where from our experience there is no option to add a tip (as is normal in the US). In addition, when paying cash (which we did most of the time), if the bill was 40 Euros and you paid with a 50, would get a 10 euro bill back (clearly no tip was expected). In the US if you paid with a 50 you'd get a $5 and 5 $1's so you had change to tip appropriately. On occasion at a counter, we'd see a tip jar, but not often.

We ate at a really nice restaurant in our hotel in Provence (bill was around 125 Euros with wine) and waiter asked if we wanted on our room (again eliminating opportunity to tip as we didn't even see the check).