Small Towns Outside Paris for Extended Stay

I like the idea of a smaller town with a slower pace, where I can integrate with the community more.

Nearly impossible to integrate into a small town community as a foreigner. The only people I know who have successfully down this was an American couple and their 3 children who did a 2 year home swap with a couple from the Bordeaux area. The American family immediately slipped into the social/family groups of the Bordeaux residents who had moved into their home in the US. It was a rare example of getting the most out of a home exchange.

Other than that, you will always be an outsider, even if your language skills are excellent.

This is one of the reasons I would stay in Paris and attempt to join as many activities as possible, just to meet other people. You will have 90 days unless you obtain a resident visa of which there are two groups, those possibly renewing after 1 year, and those not renewing who are give temporary visa for a period of from 90 to 365 days.

Parenthetically, I can´t think of a more touristy place, outside Paris, than Giverny.

Nearly impossible to integrate into a small town community as a foreigner.

Thank you for the reality check. A French acquaintance from Burgundy had similar thoughts. It’d take 10 years to be accepted, and even then, I’d still be the newcomer. Their advice was to find a quieter neighborhood in Paris with a community of English-speaking expats.

I just tend to be more comfortable in smaller towns, in the states and Britain and other places I’ve traveled, though TBH that’s part of why like Paris so much. Some neighborhoods have that relaxed pace, a feeling one can slow down, even in the heart of a major city.

That’s also why I wanted to scout some towns before I got too attached to this idea. Thanks again!

I don't know what you mean by integrate with my community more but if you mean have the baker, florist, butcher etc. remember you after a couple of visits and chit chat with you, that will happen everywhere. I actually think that small towns are less welcoming and less accessible for finding "your people" as a newcomer. That being said, keep going through An Hour Outside of Paris by Annabel Simms for some suggested places. That's how I found Rambouillet which I really like. I also feel that way about Compiègne and that has a population of about 40,000. Another place you might want to look at is Senlis. All of these places are over 10,000 people which some people might not consider a smaller town like I do. Muret-sur-Loring is about 5,000 people if you are looking for someplace smaller than the others that I mentioned. As to Paris, I have found some quiet areas in the 18th arrondissement (sort of behind Sacre Coeur), near Parc Montsouris in the 14th arrondissement, and near the Covention metro station in the 15th arrondissement. If you are willing to go farther afield (2 hours), take a look at Chablis and Auxerre.

I don't know what you mean by integrate with my community more

Yes, it’s a little vague, even for me. I mean everything you said but also just make connections with people, start to understand their lives and morals and priorities, start to feel less like a stranger and more like an acquaintance. I think it’s finally sinking in that might be easier in the city though.

Thank you very much for the specific suggestions. Rambouillet is high on my list. I’ll add the others too, including the pars of Paris.

I've always thought about living in Bayeux. So charming and the people so friendly.

I lived for a summer in a very small town south of Chalon-sur-Saone. It was not at all what I hoped it would be. I never met any of my neighbors. There was nothing to do in town. It had a traiteur, a pharmacy, and a tabac -- the end. Once per week a pizza food truck came to town. The town had a population of about 2,300. We had to drive for everything. After that trip, I decided that any small town in France that I stayed in had to be a market town or be known for something so even though Chablis is the same size as the town that I stayed in, it is much livelier because it is both a market town and it is known for Chablis. I mention all of this to suggest that you really think about what you want to do during your three months and picture what an ideal day will look like for you. When you have that set and described, you may get better suggestions. Some small towns have tons to do and some not so much. For example, my husband is very introverted and loves to drive every day and is not a person who always wants to do something every day and found the summer quite lovely. Guess who is just the opposite.

I suspect if you contacted Bets, she could have you living the life in Paris in no time, or Ms. Jo in Frankfurt or a guy I know in Budapest. It is always easier and more possible with a little coaching and some introductions.

Try just spending time somewhere in France without your complex goals. I lived in Europe for 13 years and while it was home you simply do not waltz into town and suddenly become bonded with those around you.

I have a place to go/live in western France. Locals accept my wife and I but it took a long, long time. See how you like being off the American “grid” and how you like living (not vacationing!!) in a foreign country. Certainly don’t want to be discouraging but you have big expectations that won’t be answered in 3 months. RS is useful for vacations but not for making the big leap that you are considering.

Wish you luck and patience in your new journey.

Try just spending time somewhere in France without your complex goals.

I appreciate the sentiment and will receive it in the spirit it was given. I guess I was trying not to have complex goals. :) I just want to live somewhere pleasant and try immerse myself in a different pace, connect with the people and culture.

I was trying to avoid listing a bunch of requirements, like it must be near water and have exactly 3 used bookstores or whatever. I want to be open to what life brings.

Thank you for your thoughtful reply!

We’ve enjoyed Rennes and Caen. Both are mid-sized cities with lots of young people, yet near such historic areas.

Thank you so much to all of you for the thoughts! I know I didn’t give a lot to work with, trying to avoid writing a novel here.

As I read the responses, I’m thinking I need to spend more time in Normandy, a lot of towns in the region mentioned. Bayeux sounds lovely, as do the others, along with Deauville and Trouville, which a friend recommended. I think that’ll be the focus of my fall excursion.

I’ve only rented a car in France once before, which was not a great experience, but it might be worth it if I want to do a little circuit of Normandy in a week, with some flexibility.

Thank you again!

Arlic, All the best. Do know that lovely Bayeux is all tourists, and probably the majority American and Canadian, so for sure a wonderful place to visit, but perhaps not exactly what you may be seeking for 3 months of living a less touristy place. O

As far as driving, I was very impressed with the conditions of the roads, in Brittany/Normandy. We found driving to be a pleasure. Take the train from Paris to Caen or Rennes and pick up a rental car from there.

Alric, Normandy is a great area. So is Brittany. For a while, every French person I met in America who was from Paris had a family/second home in Normandy and recently it seems like every Youtube video that I see is about an American who now lives permanently in Normandy. There is a couple who moved to France and document their adventures on their Youtube channel which is called Beneath the Surface. I watch them every so often but the husband is little to cerebral for me so I do not subscribe. I think they just settled in Normandy but I am not sure. As to Brittany, this video is from a couple who moved to Brittany and set up a Youtube channel to document their renovation of a chateau. In the linked video they recounted how the last four years have gone. It could be a fun watch for you.

Something you might try on your exploratory trip is looking on the Gites de France website for B&Bs (chambres d'hotes) which you can rent by the night (gites rent only by the week). Find some places that have four or five rooms so that there will be other guests, hopefully mostly French. Be sure to go to breakfast every morning when the other guests do. We have learned a lot about France at the breakfast table among, most of the time, French people. We speak enough French to understand the conversations and sometimes even contribute, and often there's someone who can translate a sentence that we don't understand.

You will meet people from different parts of France and you can ask them about the town or region they live in. After a few days at the same BNB, your hosts will be quite chatty. They will probably not have much time to spend with you because running a B&B is a lot of work but they will be interested in you and help you make connections.

The French value fidelity so if/when you do pick a village or small town to stay in, decide on your favorite bakery and then go there every day, even if you wind up throwing out a hunk of bread each night. Return to the same restaurant, go to the weekly market and buy strawberries from the same seller, buy cheese from the same seller every week. Ask for advice and make every transaction a conversation.

If you're doing some research online, the French Yellow Pages/pagesjaunes can give you a sense of how lively the town is. How many boulangeries does it have? Is there a cinema? Laundromat? What brand of supermarket and how big is it? ATM? Pharmacy? Decent restaurant?

If you can find a French-English conversation group, you'll make connections there.

We're familiar with a lot of small towns in two particular areas, and few of them, though great little towns, would provide what you are looking for in a 3-month stay. One I can think of is La Ferte Bernard, population 9000. It has a train station, some excellent restaurants, an attractive church, a lively lunch/tea room/brocante, historic buildings, nice stores, bars, and two markets a week. A river runs through the town in small channels, which always makes a town interesting in my opinion.

In addition to what Crumbs said, you should get a French teacher immediately or enroll in a French program. This gives you a little foot in the door.

Fall is a good time to spend three months because medium size towns will still have festivals and activities going. France culture runs on joining and participating in organisations. It does not run on church activities. So whatever interests you where you are now is what you should aim to do there: yoga, bicycling, art museums, cooking classes, hiking groups, whatever.
You mentioned expats, but that’s a different world and will keep you from immersing. Meeting people for deeper relationships takes time and doing many activities together, hence the organizations. A village or small town will have very little.
Friend in France is a rarified relationship, much cherished. A copain or copine is someone you pal around with and who may become a friend one day. We don’t use the word friend lightly.
Just be kind, respectful, ask questions but never too personal. I get into conversations about recipes at the market all the time, particularly the North African foods.
If you don’t find the right place in the north, come south. We’re friendly south of the Loire.