So almost every time I fly through CDG, I end up with some awful story. This is a trend over decades--I have numerous stories and will pay extra to fly via another airport. This time, I was not transferring, so I thought I would be okay. Turns out, Paris got me anyway!
I flew from Hamburg to CDG this weekend to see a friend in Versailles. The flight in was fine--landed, found the RER B easily enough, and an easy transfer at St. Michel Notre Dame had me on my way to Versailles with no hassle. Like anywhere in France outside of Paris, I had an amazing experience. This town is seriously lovely, and visiting friends is always amazing.
Cue the return trip. I arrived at the train station in Versailles and bought a ticket, even asking about the transfer at St. M ND. I was informed that the train went only to Invalides (why?) and that I would need to take the metro to SMND. No problem except there is no metro between those stops. So a short walk along the Seine, and I figure I will take a bus. Except . . . there were line disruptions, so when the very delayed bus finally showed up, it was very crowded. That's okay, only a few km. I still had plenty of time and a clean shirt in my bag.
I arrived at SMND only to find the station's RER B section closed. Um . . . but some nice French couple who were also headed for CDG were able to get information that there was a closure for that day only and that we should take the metro two stops to Chatelet Les Halles. Took the super jammed metro, found the RER B, and there were people on the platform. Except the train to CDG doesn't seem to be running. Only trains to Mitry Claye and Aulnay sous Bois. These seem to be three separate RER B trains as the stops listed for each do not overlap (turns out, it's mostly one line, but each of the three trains stops in different spots, but how is a stranger to know that?). Cue several confused airport-bound tourists. Why is no CDG train running?
Well, my eagle eye figures there must be a notification, and sure enough, I spot a small scrolling notification in French--but it is scrolling, so little chance of getting google translate involved, and while I think it says something about a bus, it doesn't seem to tell us which train to take. Meanwhile google maps and other apps are giving us conflicting information on which train to board and what to do upon arrival in either Aulney or Mitry. Locals advised us to go to Mitry, but other locals advised us to go to Aulney. After several trains have passed through, we finally decide that Mitry looks close to the airport and that we can always try to split a cab when we get there.
So on the (again, packed) train to Mitry--again filled with confused tourists--there is an announcement for passengers to CDG. The announcement is in French. Only in French. I don't expect all regional trains to have announcements in English, but if the announcement is for passengers to the international airport, it seems reasonable to do at least that one announcement in English, right?
Anyway, I was pretty sure it was telling us to stay on the train all the way to Mitry. And in Mitry, we were told to go into one of two lines for busses to CDG. Okay. I get in the T1/3 line. Three busses stop for the T2 line, none for us--cue lots of locals yelling about this in angry French. After another packed bus ride, we pull up, but nobody says whether this is T1 or T3 despite lots of asking. I knew there was an airport train between terminals, so after being told it was T1, I, like most on the bus got off--only to find it was T3, and I had to take yet another train.
The whole adventure could have been avoided with a few signs.
I had plenty of time when I left, so I was still well within my time, and the rest of the trip was amazing. I got a little walk on the Seine and a pic of the Eiffel Tower and Notre Dame. I made it home.
But seriously Paris, why can't you be like the rest of France???