25th Anniversary Trip

Congrats! We need some clarity here on timelines, etc., but it sounds like the perfect solution would be to take a tour and then set off on your own--I cant gauge whether you want to do the legwork or not at this point. Croatia is a super easy place to travel--English widely spoken, tourism infrastructure well established. Really just a day wit ha guide book would have you set up. You don't have to drive unless you want to explore the interior in detail. You can always do a day rental to explore a large island or the hill towns of Istria for example. The bus was fine; the catamarans part of the appeal (good views).
I am very picky about accommodations so could never leave that up to anyone else. It was cumbersome one day, but now it takes mere minutes to sort through the choices--with photos and verified reviews at your fingertips. (I use Booking.com and have no complaints.)
You posted in Croatia but mentioned interest in Montenegro (I only did a quick foray there) and Slovenia (not yet but high on my list, too), so you'll need to narrow down a bit, but for the beach time, you can not find a better place if you like clear seas and beautiful views.

This link has a collection of tourist videos in Montenegro. You might get some ideas from them. I thought there was another with videos in Bosnis and Herzegovina, but haven't found it yet. https://community.ricksteves.com/travel-forum/montenegro/podgorica-to-dubrovnik-by-car.

The Bosnia & Herzegovina (BiH) video thread link. https://community.ricksteves.com/travel-forum/croatia/the-best-of-croatia-and-slovenia-in-12-14-days.

I have talked this one to death so I will be short.

more out of the way places where there (might) be fewer tourists and
to vacation more like the locals would and enjoy the culture, cuisine
and countryside.

I am thinking Stari bar and Ulcinj in Montenegro and Travnik or Jayce in BiH and while there Sarajevo is sort of a must see.

We also like a bit more of an active holiday so hiking and seeing
places

I am certain the opportunities exist in BiH, but I know there are great opportunities in Montenegro. Rafting, kayaking (river and ocean), paragliding, hiking, even diving. But not my expertise so tell Dijana (or whom ever you find to assist, but do get some help because BiH and Montenegro are still not developed for tourism like Croatia is. But that I think is what you are looking for). Or if you want to do a real hike this might be one of the last great hikes: https://www.ourbigjourney.com/valbona-to-theth-hike-in-albania/

We also would like to have some beach time.

Easy, the coast of Montenegro.

At this point it will probably be a combination of a tour if Montenegro with Dijana and then another tour of Slovenia with possibly Slovenia Explorer. We are still deciding though to be honest. The original plan, which we may still go with is to do the RS Tour of the Adriatic. However, the issue then is we wouldn't have much time to really explore what Montenegro has to offer. From what I see of your posts and others, it has a lot to offer and can be much less expensive. I have had contact with Dijana and am looking forward to what she has to offer. At this point it looks to be a significant cost savings. I've seen your videos of Montenegro and it looks like it has so much to offer. What can you tell me about Montenegro? Are there any out of the way beaches or waterfalls or places to see? Where do the locals go for holidays? I talk to Dijana for the first time next Wednesday to come up with more of a plan. What tips would you have for when I talk to her? So far, its' just been through email.

I know you are looking for input other than me. So think of this as me bumping your post to the top again. Hopefully TexasTravelMom (TTM) will see this as I know she has been to Montenegro recently.

A few of my favorite stops over the years.

Đurđevića Tara Bridge: Stunning views into the deepest canyone in Europe. Zip lines across it and river rafting in it. Some local markets on one end of the bridge. The same end that has the Motel Tara MB which has this deck that looks out over all of it. Simple but nice hotel that has gotten me back twice so far.

Ostrog Monastery: Seeing it stuck in the side of the vertical wall of the mountain is pretty impressive. The tour is good. A few minutes down the road is the Sokoline Hotel with a deck that may have one of the more impressive views I have every encountered. Food is good too.

Garnet Winery: A long winding road not far from the border with Albania will take you up to this maybe 500 year old pretty much abandoned stone village. Here is Garnet Winery. Okay, to be honest not the best wine I ever had, but i am picky. But the views going up, the beauty of the abandoned old stone buildings that cling to the side of the mountain, the atmosphere of the tasing porch and the kindness of the host make it a fantastic trip.

Lucka Olive Oil: A fairly new olive vinyeard oil production company. Family owned. They will set up the picknic table for you and treat you like family for a few hours and feed you way too much as you sample the oil and learn about it. Again, time very well spent.

Stari Bar: A medieval ghost town and one of the loveliest but most simple streets i have encountered in the Balkans. For some reason a place I love to return to. There is a hotel there that I think TTM stayed at. I am jealous. Maybe next trip.

I love Budva. Sorry. Just works. The old town is small but comfortable. Its definately not Dubrovnik and I understand it can get a bit crowded in July/August. There is a gentleman that runs and excellent day fishing trip off the coast. If that interests you I can look up the name. I enjoyed it. Oh, then he gave us the name of a restaurant to take the fish and have it cooked for dinner. Pretty special meal.

Perast: The restaurant at the hotel Conte. It sits on the edge of the bay. Dinner as the sunset is a moment you just can not forget.

Njegusi prosciutto. You go up this winding switchback road out of Kotor with views that will knock you socks off and at the top is a village (well more like spread out along the road) famous for the prosciutto. One has a curing house you can tour before you try. Just a lovely day.

Okay, your post is back at the top.

Hi,
This all sounds wonderful. I look forward to our trip already and its a year away. With that in mind, how long and where wold you stay in each of those places? I know that Hotel Mara would be wonderful but how many nights? What about in Perast? 2 nights? Stari? What are your thoughts on Lake Skadar I think it is spelled? Dormitory National Park? Is the winery you mentioned and the Olive Oil place close together that they could be combined in one day? Maybe I should ask Dijana these questions or maybe she will design a tour with these in mind? I talk to her this next week. Would it be best to stay in most places 2 nights and then branch out for day trips so we don't switch accommodations so much. After all, holidays are supposed to be relaxing. Having a "base of operations" and driving aren't the end of the world and we are used to driving a couple hours a day on holidays anyways.

What so impressed you with Budva? Just the ambiance? Food? Was it noisy with the party scene I the summer? We are planning for late May / early June next year.

Where exactly is Njegusi prosciutto.? This sounds interesting.

Have you ever done the cable car above Kotor? Was it worth it? Is there something better?

So much to see and do.

I'm still waiting to hear back from TTM as well.

Mr E, Have you ever visited Tivat? Thoughts?. Recommendations? I know that we can't visit it all so I would like to know if its worth it or is it a stop that can be replaced by another day elsewhere?