I am a 39 (thirty nine) year old single man. I already have tickets to go to Los Angeles in December when my workplace will be closed. The company will be closed between Christmas and new years. Factoring in the fact that we don't work on weekends and that two weekdays will be paid holidays because both Christmas and New Years will be on weekends, I probably will only use up 3 paid vacation days. That leaves 7 paid vacation days left. I could get permission to take 3 extra unpaid days off. If I did that I would just lie and tell my parents that all my vacation days are paid time off. I am thinking of going to Mexico City and maybe Teotihuacan and possibly somewhere else outside Mexico City, in 2023 sometime before my paid vacation expires, maybe March.
But I could be persuaded to find a place in the USA to go to. My paid vacation time resets on my anniversary date which is in the 3rd week of June. Should I skip Mexico permanently, go but wait a year after Los Angeles, or find a "safer" destination??
I already feel quite guilty and/or stupid enough about going to Los Angeles. The top reason I think I feel so stupid about traveling on my time off work is because my mother is always so horrified at me for traveling. Maybe part of my brain thinks I should not travel because my travel causes my mom's anxiety about my travel. I logically know that I do rather thorough research and pick reasonably safe places. All people have hipocracies and contradictions. Another part of my brain thinks my guilt about travel is ridiculous or non-sensical. The ultra-maxium length I would travel for is 14 nights. I am not talking about doing something stupid like quitting work and traveling for a super long time like some people on youtube claim to have done.
At first glance it looks like I have enough money to afford it but when I convince my mom that I pick reasonably safe places, she switches to saying that "Michael, you can't afford to travel!", so I might feel guilty about the cost of a trip(s). I keep track of my bank accounts. I have no student loan payments, no car payments or other debts, no mortgage (I live on my own but I am renting). Without giving too much information, I usually am extremely careful with money. Travel is one of the few things I let myself spend money. Even when I travel I try to do it in a cheap way. For example, my last major trip to Spain was 13 nights on the ground, 1 night on the plane and cost me under approximately $2,800. I have 2 so far minimally funded retirement accounts + stocks that if I sold them would give me roughly 6 or more years of living expenses + other random piles of un-invested money in checking and savings accounts + my paycheck goes into one checking account and I set up transferring $300 from that into another checking account held by the investment bank that holds my stocks. Maybe by accident I am a genius at managing money. But still, part of my brain feels guilty for spending money on travel. My salary is not high, I just am good at hoarding money, not buying unnecessary stuff, avoiding debts, and so on. How can I justify spending money on a trip when I could buy more stocks or funds? Am I traveling too frequently? How do I give myself permission to travel or quit feeling so guilty for travel on my time off work? Am I responsible for not doing activities that activate my parent's anxiety? Kids aren't supposed to do activities without their parents permission. Part of my brain might feel like I am kid-like while everybody else who is chronologically an adult is adult-like.