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Having Friend's Children Stay in Room

If my friend asks me if her two teenage children can share a room with me on a joint vacation, and she is sharing a room with her husband, should she contribute money to the room? If so, how much?

Thank you.

Posted by
2665 posts

Personally, I wouldn't want to be saddled with that at any price, but if you are willing to do so, then you need to consider the hotel terms and conditions of age of children/adults and if there is a charge for a 3rd person. From there, I would look at charging 2/3 the cost, as you are giving up 2/3 of the space (and if they are girls, then a lot more than 2/3 haha)
Alternatively, I would be looking at apartments with 3 bedrooms and you pay 1/3. Really, an apartment would be so much more comfortable and often more cost effective.

Posted by
187 posts

She should pay 2/3 of the cost of the room. But are you sure you really want to have her kids in your room? What if there's an injury/illness, etc? Why can't her kids stay in her room?

Posted by
3354 posts

My immediate thought is two words - Solo room!

Why get a larger room to then be inconvenienced during your vacation? One of many reasons - Many of the hotels only have one key, so you could be locked out. I doubt teenagers will be going to bed and getting up with your schedule.

And bluntly, the parents would get all of the fun, and you would be signing up for all of the responsibility and inconvenience. I wouldn’t even apologize when I responded “No thanks”.

Posted by
1082 posts

I agree an apartment would be a better alternative where you have your own room and pay 1/3 of cost.

Or let them rent a second room for their two children or get a family room for four. They are their children.

If you want to accommodate your friends, I would take one child and let them have the other. Triples are tight and it makes no sense for you to have the triple and they the double when they are their children.

We shared rooms traveling all the time with our kids but it is much tougher to share with teenagers. We only would do it while on the way to somewhere that we rented an apartment or house.

Posted by
175 posts

Oh, this sounds extremely unpleasant, but yes, she should pay the entire cost of the room, and here is why - 2/3 of the occupants are her kids, in addition to you having to put up with them and be responsible for whatever they end up doing while in the room. I personally would never do this. I would want my own room. I wouldn't even do this if the friend paid 100% of the cost, because it isn't worth it to me. In my opinion, if she asks you to share a room with two teenagers, then she should pay for all of it.

Posted by
187 posts

Yes, good point, Adrienne. This is sort of like the OP babysitting, not getting paid, and also paying for a room where she's conducing the free babysitting.

Posted by
3 posts

Another related question: how would you divide costs if you were sharing one room with your friend and her two teenage children?

Posted by
1839 posts

You know the friend (and I assume the husband and the two teenagers). If the teenagers (I assume they are both girls) are decent kids and you SERIOUSLY do not mind sharing a room, then the friend should pay 2/3 of the cost.

Your second question about sharing a room with the mom and the two teens, then she should pay 3/4 of the cost.

But, I assume you WANT to keep your room cost as low as possible? If you are not on a very tight budget, then I would suggest getting a solo room, and let the two teens share a room by themselves.

Travel can be stressful. Have you traveled with this family before? Shared rooms with any of them? If not, do consider that sometimes there is a such a thing as "too much togetherness." Having your OWN room can provide a peaceful escape in the evening/night/morning (or just during the day when you want to relax).

Let us all know what you decide, and then after your trip, how you survive :)

Posted by
2408 posts

My immediate thought is two words - Solo room!

I agree for both rooming scenarios. Unless you are extremely close to these kids, like an aunt or something. Don't do it. You'll be with these people all day long, give yourself some time alone at night.

Posted by
11153 posts

I agree that I wouldn't want to do this, at any price. Here are some issues to consider besides money:

1) You will need to make sure you get a room that can is designated to sleep three people. European hotels and European beds are much smaller than US ones, and you can't put any more people in a room than it is rated for. And often, anyone over about 10 or 12 is an "adult" for hotel purposes. Don't think you can get a room for 2 and then put all 3 of you in it - you'll need a triple.

2) This triple will have only one bathroom. Will you and the two teenagers be OK with that?

For these reasons, either getting three rooms, or getting an apartment with multiple bedrooms and bathrooms, is a much better idea.

Posted by
3221 posts

You put this in the "Beyond Europe" section. So not sure where you are planning on going on this vacation.

If you do go to Europe, it is very important that you reserve rooms for the number of people that will be in each room. This is because in many hotels, B&B, other places to stay, your room will be barely large enough for the people count you reserve. Is one of the reasons for having the children stay with you is so it is one room for 2 and a second room for 3 which would in many cases cost less than a room for 4 and a single room? In the US, most rooms in chain hotels can be reserved with 2 queen size beads which can easily fit 4 people. You don't have to specify and many don't charge extra for the extra person unless you ask for an extra bed (roll away).

My personal opinion is the parents get one room ,the children get room 2, and you get your own room. After spending the day on vacation doing all the vacation activities, I really would want my own room to unwind in to get ready for another day of the same.

Posted by
10885 posts

I would charge 2x the cost of the room for putting up the little buggers.....

Posted by
2360 posts

2 teenage girls would leave you no time in the bathroom.

Posted by
8293 posts

So, it seems your friends have not already asked you to share your room with their kids. The fact that you are asking if the parents should contribute to the cost of the room leads me to think that you are considering it. Why would you even give it a second's thought? Of course, it would be good for your budget but would it be good for your overall enjoyment? You have to wonder what the two teenagers would feel about it, as well. Does anyone know a teenager who would welcome rooming with a friend of Mum and Dad on vacation?

Posted by
1960 posts

Another related question: how would you divide costs if you were sharing one room with your friend and her two teenage children?

Unless you love these children as much or more than your own, I would stay home.

Posted by
4804 posts

I guess one issue that may have not been stated directly, but needs to, "Do you know how rooms are typically charged out in Europe vs the US?"

In the US, it is typical that you pay for a room, and you can have up to four people in that room. Not so in Europe for most hotels. In Europe you pay for a Single, A Double, a Triple, or possibly a Family room. Each designation is just that, a single for one, a double for 2, etc. In this case, you would need to reserve a Triple, which costs significantly more than a single. The parents may not even be able to get a Quad anyway, meaning they are probably looking at getting two doubles.

I guess I would start looking at hotels. The simplest is that, as a group, you will need a double for the parents, A double for the kids, and a single for you. At the very least, if you do get a triple, then they should pay the difference between a Single and a Triple. They can also look for a Family room, which may be set up as sort of a suite, but those are rare. You might also look at Apartments with several rooms.

I guess, I should dd an edit, after responding noticed that this is a first time poster and under "Beyond Europe" take my advice if it applies, if not, then fine.

Posted by
3354 posts

I have to ask - is this posting’s intention actually trying to ask how much you can reduce the cost for your vacation, i.e. the friend hasn't asked you to share a room, but you're trying to find out how much you can share rooms and reduce your personal vacation expenses?

As a previous poster mentioned, I doubt the teenagers would be excited about these options, and you may ruin your friendship with too much "togetherness" on vacation if you're just trying to be frugal.

Posted by
850 posts

I don't understand why this is even a question. If it's a triple room, and there are 2 teens, they are using ⅔ of the room, and pay ⅔ of the price of the room.

Posted by
3133 posts

Is this a serious question as this sounds like madness. Someone wants to impose her two teenagers on a solo traveler so the parents can have a hotel room to themselves and the OP's concern is who pays what.....REALLY. LOL

Posted by
5019 posts

No - this would be if the husband doesn't come on trip.

Sounds like Hubby is no fool. He knows something you are yet to learn. I'd take his hint.

Posted by
30931 posts

alison,

This sounds like a recipe for a very unpleasant travel experience. I agree with others on this point - single room! The cost isn't a factor as I wouldn't do this at any cost! If the parents want privacy, they can pay for an extra room for the kids.

Posted by
6118 posts

Truly an odd sequence of question and responses.

OP presumably is a woman, ( alisonjney), but this has been a presumption among the respondents, not an established fact.

The gender(s) of the teenagers is unknown ( 2 girls, 2 boys, 1 of each?)

Is OP traveling solo? Seemingly so, but again an 'assumption'.

And given this is in the 'Beyond Europe' section, just where is the proposed trip? Hotel configurations do vary by country/region, so theorizing about how it would work and what the appropriate financial arrangement might be is, at this point, like discussing how many angels can sit on a pinhead.

Posted by
258 posts

In the past when my daughters were younger, I have traveled with them, my husband along with another couple (no kids). It would never in a million years occur to me to ask them to take on the responsibility of my children. That being said, they have usually offered to have the girls sleep with them 1 night of the trip so my husband & I can have a date night, which I gratefully accepted and then would pay for dinner one night as a thank you. I have also traveled with just my friend & daughters. When they were younger, we all shared a room and I paid 3/4. once they became teenagers, I booked 2 rooms, 1 for my kids & 1 for my friend & I. I then paid for 1 1/2 rooms. the one for my daughters and 1/2 of the room I shared with my friend.

Anything less, then you are being taken advantage of, unless of course you are very close to these kids and are more like an Aunt and truly would love to spend all your waking moments of your vacation with them. Or of course if you have much more disposable income than your friend and are a generous soul.

Posted by
187 posts

I shouldn't have bothered giving a serious reply. In retrospect, it seems like a question asked in jest.

Posted by
23384 posts

I agree - there hasn't been anything to get our teeth into since the 29th, and not much then. Either a drive by or a joke.

Posted by
1493 posts

If my friend asks me

Yikes. "Must be a really good friend." So, it's not settled yet as an affirmative?

Even if you love kids (or they call you "Auntie") don't you want your own privacy?

Was this an off hand discussion between you and your friends? They are a family, so why must they have a private room while you share?

I think I read from another poster that they can get an adjoining room. They still have their privacy and so do the teens, but still within arms reach so to speak. How old are the teens? -- beginning or entering adult hood.

If they wanted a second honeymoon, then they should offer some compensation. And yes, they need to pay for their share of your room. Goodness. Some forum questions are too funny ^,^